Update from Disney Meeting... I have a replacement.

[MsDisney23]

Again, for those of you who have followed this. Please do not flame me as I was only being kind.

I do have a replacement, I have asked another girlfriend, she was so excited. I talked with her this morning, then I went over to see her and drop off all the information. She said she was 99% sure that she would go. I just know that she will fit right in with the rest of us. I must be honest and tell you that I feel so much better with her going. I feel it will be better for myself and the rest of the group going.

I was very honest with my girlfriend who is now going and told her the story. I told her how bad that I felt, but this was out of my hands and the stress became to much for me to handle. After all I did nothing wrong and I am very hurt of how my friend treated me, as I would have never done that to her.

All of my friends in the group knew this was a hard decision for me to have to make, but they all feel it was the best one. As some have said, what would happen when we got there. Well I do not want to find out.

Now, My friend was so very disrespectful, rude and way out of line. I am not sure how to tell her that I have a change of heart and have replaced her. One of the girls told me that since it would cost $100.00 change fee that maybe Elaine did not think that I would make a change. I feel terrible over this, but this was her doing.

How would you tell her? Should I be just like her and do and say nothing and let her figure it out for herself. ( A taste of her own medicine) write her, just what to do and how. I would like to go ahead and keep planning this wonderful trip for me and my friends...

 

[poohbears5]

 

[battricia]

I would suggest calling or writing to her, and saying, Since you didn't seem interested in the trip I decided to find a replacement for you. I know your children are very important to you, and I wouldn't want my meetings, or the trip to come between that, so I felt it was better for the both of us that I find a replacement.



tricia.

 

[chell]

Should I be just like her and do and say nothing and let her figure it out for herself. ( A taste of her own medicine)

No. I would be the bigger person. You should tell her, the sooner the better.

Sorry you've had to deal with all this.

 

[janette]

I don't think I'd have made the offer to someone else before I told the first person they were being replaced. Could get complicated, tell her as soon as you can as tactfully as you can.

 

[kasar]

I don't know, MsDisney, I think you owe her the courtesy of talking to her first before finding someone else. Yes, she has been rude and inconsiderate to you but you DID ask her first and she accepted, sort of an agreement. I'm not flaming here, you have every right to do whatever you want. She may be happy to not be going but I really feel you should have found that out first. That's my 2 cents.

 

[kilee]

I definetly think I'd talk to her. And ASAP!! I mean she is your friend, even if she isn't acting the greatest right now. I don't think it's overly fair to ask someone else, before you and her talked.

Out of curiosity how did you win the trip????? That would be so exciting.

 

[MsDisney23]

Again when I called her to make our meeting on a night that would be could for her, she bluntly told me off! Now what is wrong with this picture. I have tried to please her and talk with her many of times. I have to consider my other friends that are going as well. All of them have been so involved and excited. They also have been stood up her.

How I won this trip. I live in South Jersey, and every year on Channel 6, Philadelphia they put on their annual Thanksgiving Day/Boscov's Parade. They advertised this parade two weeks prior to the day. They said to go to your local Boscov's and enter to win one of three Grand Prize. Then watch live on Thanksgiving Day to see if you name is shown as a Grand Prize winner. I saw my name!!!!! My house went crazy.

Please all of you know that I feel very very bad over this situation, however I do not deserved to be told off for being kind and inviting her and trying to include her with the group. Trust me I am very hurt over this.

 

[Beth E. (NJ)]

Congratulations to you on winning the trip and being kind and generous enough to take some of your friends with you! If anyone drops out I will volunteer to take their place! LOL

No flames here -- but I do think you need to tell your friend as soon as you can. I don't envy you the job of telling her. I would have some serious stomach knots if I had to have that conversation. But I think that she needs to know as soon as possible so she won't be mentally planning for a trip that doesn't happen.

Have a wonderful time on your trip!

 

[meeshi]

Wow, I'm sorry that something as wonderful as winning a trip to Disney has turned into such a stressful situation for you.

I think you should tell your friend asap about the replacement and probably should have talked to her before you offered it to someone else.

 

[MsDisney23]

How does one talk with someone who bluntly tells them off and then says they have to go? There is no more that I can do to please her! I did not deserve any of this.

 

[kasar]

I really don't think anyone has told you off. You asked for opinions on this and I think everyone has been completely understanding and helpful in their opinions. You asked us how you should tell her and we've pretty much all answered the same way. Whether you take that advice or not is completely up to you.

I still stand by my opinion that you should let her know either as a courtesy to her or just for your own peace of mind. I know I'd be a nervous wreck thinking that someone else would tell her before I had the chance. I really wish you luck with this one - I'm sure this is not how you imagined this whole situation when you won!

Good luck.

 

[ScarlettO]

Write her a note. She isn't worth your anxiety.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

Well as it stands right now, you've invited one extra person on the trip. Hey - it's your prize and your decision to make on who should go. But I have to agree that you owe whomever is uninvited to courtesy of letting them know.

I realize you're angry with her for missing the t-shirt planning meeting. But still, if you say NOTHING then there is a chance that she is going to want to show up on your doorstep with her bags packed the day of the trip - And that wouldn't be much fun for anybody.

If you can't stand the thought of telling her in person, then write her a letter or email. I agree that you need to do it ASAP.

 

[MsDisney23]

Dear Kasar,

I did not mean that anyone here on Dis told me off. I mean my so called girlfriend, she bluntly told me off lastnight, There was NO talking to her.

I do plan on telling her that due to the situation that I have to rescend my invitation. I will let her know how hurt and upset all of this has made me. I was only being kind to her and extending my friendship to her.

 

[Poohbear123]

Best of Luck, and I would have done the SAME thing!

 

[kasar]

I did not mean that anyone here on Dis told me off. I mean my so called girlfriend, she bluntly told me off lastnight, There was NO talking to her.

I misunderstood you. Sorry.

 

[annemariec]

I'd probably just tell her by phone. Being that she didn't make any effort to make good on her commitments to seeing you (and the group) in person. Didn't give you the courtesy of telling you she couldn't make it. And she told you off. I think it would be more stressful to do it in person, and you don't need it.

She may "see" it coming. You don't treat people like that and not have any consequences. Most people won't stand for it.

I probably would have told her first, but then I'm not in the thick of it. Good luck. You are entitled to your feelings. Try to have a great trip. Don't let this mess spoil it.

Annemarie

 

[zurgswife]

Good luck letting your friend know....


What a hard spot to be in....

 

[Serena]

I would tell her as soon as possible.