Ugh - travel hockey could wreck our WDW trip!

[canadakath]

Just needed to vent and figured my fellow Canuck Disney lovers would understand. Oldest DS will be playing his second year of travel hockey this year, but this time on the MD team where he will be one of the better players as opposed to one of the weaker ones. This means the coach does not want him to miss a tournament, and the WDW trip we have booked the last week of November may have to be cancelled, or at least shortened.

Personally, I don't think any sport should control your life for 9 months of the year and I am OK with him missing the tournament. He says he wants to go to Disney instead (there are 2 maybe 3 other tournaments in the year). But DH is harder to convince, and the coach has set out his expectations that these 9 year old kids will be there. Ugh!

We got POR for free dining, all of our ADR's our made, and non-refundable plane tickets purchased. Time to go search for alternatives, but I hope our original plan stays...

Thanks for letting me vent...

 

[sechelt]

Men and their hockey, eh? I get it. I have three sons and a husband but still, I'm on your side. They're children for such a short time so why not enjoy the Disney trip while they still want you around? My youngest is now 28 and I long for those days when he was only 9 and still thought I actually knew something.

Good luck. Hope you win!

 

[MedicGoofy]

While Im not a mom, which means Im not a hockey mom, or a soccer mom, or a travelling van mom of any kind.......at that age, having to schedule your entire life around a 9 year olds hockey schedule is kind of ridiculous. I know that missing a game to a coach is big. I know that they want their players there, and they do believe that when you sign up, that you are committing to the team. BUT, on the flip side, if a family decides to do something, than that takes priority. Even if it is to see the mouse

The mere fact that your son has said he would rather go to Disney says a lot. It's not like you are taking him kicking and screaming while he wants to stay and play hockey.

Good luck deciding, hold your head up high. Hockey is just a sport. Family time is forever

Jenn

 

[Mickey1Fan]

Let the coach know now your DS won't be there. He can plan accordingly. Hockey will overtake your whole life if you let it!

A coworker gave up everything for her son to play hockey figuring he'd be the next big goaltender in the NHL. No one picked him up and she regrets all the hours and hours spent in a rink! They did nothing else for 15 years!

 

[damo]

I cherish every single tournament my son played in as a rep hockey player. Those were wonderful times . Just as wonderful as any Disney trip. It is all what you make of it. We made each tournament a family vacation and our hockey team was one big extended family for years and years. Life long friendships were made. I will never regret the time we devoted to it. We planned other family vacations in non-hockey times. And I was a hockey mom, not a dad.

 

[CanuckTraveller]

I'm with the OP, hockey does not modify a trip that is already booked, especially when your son is choosing the trip over hockey. I'm a hockey mom, my son is a goalie, so I know all about the coach's wrath when you miss a tournament for a vacation I tell them at the start of the season when we will be away and that's it. Unfortunately you know about the tournament now, I find announcing the trip before the schedule is announced works best. Go, enjoy the trip, there will be lots of hockey left to play when you return.
Speaking of which, I'd better get on that announcement

 

[dis_guy]

I'm a guy and I don't get the "hockey at all costs" attitude. These are 9 year olds for heaven's sake.

I'm a teacher and I've struggled with the "hockey is more important than school" thing for 30 years now.

 

[kenziesmum]

My dd plays rep hockey also (Minor Bantam). She also is a goalie. This year we are going to Disney in September. She will miss 4 exhibition games. She is kinda bummed about that, but rather go to Disney ETA - her coach this year is pretty cool about it also.

A few years ago, my parents took her to Disney for her bday. She was the only goalie on her team that year (she played minor atom A). We let the coach know when the team was chosen that she would miss a week in December. He didn't schedule any games that week, only practices and was very good about it.

It depends on the coach you have. Hockey is important, but it is 3rd on my list. 1. Family, 2. School, 3. Hockey.

 

[canadakath]

We are still exploring options but it is definitely frustrating. On one hand, I can understand the coach's request for commitment. On the other hand, Disney trips (at least the way I like to do them) require advance planning and I don't want to give up what I've already got! I avoided any weekends that we had tournaments last year, but lost in my crap shoot anyways.

One option is to have good friends of ours (who are overlapping our trip at the beginning) have the mom and daughter stick around with youngest DS and I, while DH and oldest DS catch an $80 one way flight home early for the tournie. DS still says he wants to go on the trip over the tournie, but we can fit a lot into the four days he would be there if we upgrade to park hoppers. Youngest DS would love having his friend around for the last few days and the food and room are already paid for so our friends would just have to add extra days to their tickets.

Another option is to go in September instead, but we really like November for weather etc. And I am not sure that I can get that time off work instead of the November time I already have booked.

In the end we will do whatever is best for our family, regardless of the coach's opinion. We are pretty easy-going as hockey parents go, DH has volunteered as trainer, and we won't cause any other troubles over the year (I hope!) Even DS said today "I'll play at all the other tournaments. Just because I miss one shouldn't mean I don't get to play the rest of the year". Well said, young man, well said.

 

[lynypixie]

My son is starting Hockey this year. This is what I fear most, the commitments. I almost hope that he's not that good.

Thing is, he's not my only child. I've got 3, who are close in age. I can't plan my life around him only.

 

[damo]

We are still exploring options but it is definitely frustrating. On one hand, I can understand the coach's request for commitment. On the other hand, Disney trips (at least the way I like to do them) require advance planning and I don't want to give up what I've already got! I avoided any weekends that we had tournaments last year, but lost in my crap shoot anyways.

One option is to have good friends of ours (who are overlapping our trip at the beginning) have the mom and daughter stick around with youngest DS and I, while DH and oldest DS catch an $80 one way flight home early for the tournie. DS still says he wants to go on the trip over the tournie, but we can fit a lot into the four days he would be there if we upgrade to park hoppers. Youngest DS would love having his friend around for the last few days and the food and room are already paid for so our friends would just have to add extra days to their tickets.

Another option is to go in September instead, but we really like November for weather etc. And I am not sure that I can get that time off work instead of the November time I already have booked.

In the end we will do whatever is best for our family, regardless of the coach's opinion. We are pretty easy-going as hockey parents go, DH has volunteered as trainer, and we won't cause any other troubles over the year (I hope!) Even DS said today "I'll play at all the other tournaments. Just because I miss one shouldn't mean I don't get to play the rest of the year". Well said, young man, well said.

It isn't parents like you that good coaches get upset about. You sound very committed and are really looking out for the best for everybody. Sometimes things like this can't be avoided, especially when you've already booked. I wouldn't worry about it and just let the coach know that the vacation was already booked before you knew about the tournament, as you have probably already done.

 

[jerlove]

DS 11 has played Rep hockey for the last 5 years and we have taken him one week each year for our WDW trips.

Some years we get lucky and just miss a couple of games other years we miss a tourney but bottom line is if he was sick they would play with out him so what difference does it make if he leaves for a week for a vacation.

 

[Kat&Dom]

I feel your pain. Last November, we had our disney trip booked then found out it was home tournament. I talked to the coaches and the director. Thankfully, our flight arrived back at 2pm on Saturday so we were able to make the 5pm game. We missed the first 2 games (Friday night and Saturday morning) but made it to the Saturday night and Sunday morning games. I still had to do all my volunteer shifts so when we returned from vacation, it was full blast hockey.

This year, we have a trip to Disneyland booked over the Remembrance day weekend and I am hoping that there is nothing important with hockey that weekend. I don't even have any of the hockey schedule yet - all I know is that tryouts are in 2 weeks. I will tell the coach at the tryouts that we will be missing the one weekend in November plus a week in February.

We did not miss any other games last year other than the 2 home tournament games and we will not miss any games other than our planned vacations this year. It is tough because I believe that you should be committed to the team but family life is important too and one needs to be balanced.

I watched my older brother with his son miss so many family events to have my nephew in various hockey camps, spring hockey, etc. It was a big financial commitment and at age 15, my nephew decided that he didn't want to play hockey anymore so I decided that when my son started playing that I would not sacrifice family time for hockey.

Good luck on your decision!

 

[maryliz]

I'm all for committment, even at the houseleague level, but family time trumps it all. Your vacation is already booked ... end of story. For me, it wouldn't matter if it was houseleague, MD, or all the way up to AAA. Life is too short ... go and have a fabulous vacation. You have given the coach enough notice, and they can secure an AP to take your son's place for that tournament. Shouldn't be a problem whatsoever.

 

[who's ur daddy?]

I think it's ridiculous to have to cancel a pre-planned trip to go to a tournament.

We caused some headache for our team manager by scheduling a March break trip last year. We assumed hockey would be shut down for the March break - I guess not - it's prime time playoff season... But we went on our March break trip nonetheless and surprisingly no one died. Who woulda thunk. We now know that mid-March is prime time playoff season and the team manager has asked (at the beginning of the season) parents to be available during the March break.

I have two kids in competitive hockey. I love the hockey experience and am a crazy hockey dad in every sense of the word. But in my mind life experiences (especially the Disney type) will always trump a silly weekend hockey tournament. I don't want to make MY desire and enjoyment watching my kids play as the reason to pick hockey over the trip...

 

[tgropp]

My son went through the same thing but we had very understanding coaches (AA & AAA) when it came time to family vacations. There was never a problem. But as they got older (14-15) the coach did not want them missing hockey due to concerts, day trips etc as this was the age where they wanted to install discipline and teamwork. If there is a problem with your family vacation, shame on the coach and your citys hockey association.

 

[laura001]

Just needed to vent and figured my fellow Canuck Disney lovers would understand. Oldest DS will be playing his second year of travel hockey this year, but this time on the MD team where he will be one of the better players as opposed to one of the weaker ones. This means the coach does not want him to miss a tournament, and the WDW trip we have booked the last week of November may have to be cancelled, or at least shortened.

Personally, I don't think any sport should control your life for 9 months of the year and I am OK with him missing the tournament. He says he wants to go to Disney instead (there are 2 maybe 3 other tournaments in the year). But DH is harder to convince, and the coach has set out his expectations that these 9 year old kids will be there. Ugh!

We got POR for free dining, all of our ADR's our made, and non-refundable plane tickets purchased. Time to go search for alternatives, but I hope our original plan stays...

Thanks for letting me vent...

We too had a son that played AAA hockey (was MVP of the league a few years in a row) and I will tell you that never a year went by that we did not leave and take our vacation.

The coach always knew that we were going and it was just too darn bad. Hockey rules your life, but only if you LET it!

One year, we actually were away for try outs and came home on the last day. He went that day and still made the team. We never asked for special consideration and never expected it. They knew we weren't there and to tell you the truth, if he didn't make the team because we were away....too bad, he could play somewhere else.

Truth be known, your child in all probability isn't going to the NHL (even if they are the best) and to put HOCKEY ahead of your Family Time is just crazy (IMHO). The team will survive! Don't get me wrong, we never condoned our son missing for any other reason, he was committed to the team, but not at the expense of our family time.

Hockey parents are a different breed, I can remember some parents crying in the arena when their kids didn't make a team....how sad is that?

 

[snowangel72]

Wow Kath that is crazytown for a 9 year old. I am sorry but that's nuts! It's kid's hockey for heaven's sakes!!!! Hockey takes up our winter as well but I would never ever alter my Disney plans for it. Sorry, no way no day. They are only little once. They won't have any interest in vacationing with you in just a few years. People in this country are freakin hockey insane.

What will your DH say if your little guy comes down with bronchitis and can't play in the tourney anyway? Or stomach flu the day before the tourney? Guess he's missing it anyway huh?

 

[canadakath]

Thanks all. We are going as planned and missing the tournie. I gave DS the choice to go for a shorter time and come back for the tournament or go for the whole trip. He chose the trip and I support him 100%. Hockey will be waiting for him when we get back!

 

[LSmith]

We too had a son that played AAA hockey (was MVP of the league a few years in a row) and I will tell you that never a year went by that we did not leave and take our vacation.

The coach always knew that we were going and it was just too darn bad. Hockey rules your life, but only if you LET it!

One year, we actually were away for try outs and came home on the last day. He went that day and still made the team. We never asked for special consideration and never expected it. They knew we weren't there and to tell you the truth, if he didn't make the team because we were away....too bad, he could play somewhere else.

Truth be known, your child in all probability isn't going to the NHL (even if they are the best) and to put HOCKEY ahead of your Family Time is just crazy (IMHO). The team will survive! Don't get me wrong, we never condoned our son missing for any other reason, he was committed to the team, but not at the expense of our family time.

Hockey parents are a different breed, I can remember some parents crying in the arena when their kids didn't make a team....how sad is that?

How refreshing to hear it like this. I always get in trouble for saying that we take our children out of school for travel on the DIS. Some people cannot comprehend it.

Last year my daughter (and son) missed over 35 days of school. My daughter still graduated with high honours and was awarded athlete of the year. My son is still an honour student and athlete.

We did the same with our older child who is now 23. He survived, the school survived and the sports teams he was on survived.

Family is 1st. School 2nd (gasp!). Sports 3rd. Works for us.