twisted wishes

[Good Ol Gal]

granted, but you drink so much that you pass out on your keyboard. Your boss finds you that way and fires you on the spot.

I wish I could go to the bathroom without having a kid knocking on the door.

 

[Jrsy Boy]

granted, but you drink so much that you pass out on your keyboard. Your boss finds you that way and fires you on the spot.

I wish I could go to the bathroom without having a kid knocking on the door.

Granted...but now there are grown men knocking because you are in the men's room.

I wish that I was in better shape.

 

[Bbgrizzle]

Granted, but now you have dirty old ladies pawing at you whenever you go to the beach.

I wish I were going to see POTC today.

P.S. Good Ol Gal, I LOVE my Tivo too!

 

[wils]

Granted but you are going to see the original film not 'POTC2 -Dead Man's Chest'

I wish that it was the weekend already!

 

[Good Ol Gal]

I wish that it was the weekend already!

Granted, but it's Sunday at 11:59pm... weekends over!

I wish that I didn't have to clean out the litter box

 

[laurajetter]

granted, but now the cat's favorite spot to poop is on your bed pillow.

I wish my house was completely clean, every nook and cranny.

 

[Jrsy Boy]

granted, but now the cat's favorite spot to poop is on your bed pillow.

I wish my house was completely clean, every nook and cranny.

Granted...but now your house smells like a hospital and no one wants to visit you.

I wish I had x-ray vision.

 

[Grumpy's Wife]

Granted but the only place it works in at a retirement village

I wish I had homemade cookies in my cookie jar

 

[Good Ol Gal]

granted, but you're cookie jar is at you're old, stinky, hairy neighbor's house.

I wish I didn't have to go to the post office today.

 

[Darth Cupcake]

Granted --- But everyone who walks through the post office door today gets a 1000 $100 bills.

I wish weeds didn't grow in my lawn.

 

[Grumpy's Wife]

Granted but now all your bills are past due

I wish weekends were longer than two days

 

[Good Ol Gal]

I wish weeds didn't grow in my lawn.

Granted, but grass doesn't grow either, so now it's just a big pile of mud

I wish weekends were longer than two days

Granted, weekends are now 5 days long. Problem is, you only work weekends.

I wish I could tap a nap right now.

 

[Bbgrizzle]

Granted, but you wake up with a long beard and realize you've been asleep for 100 years!

I wish I had a screen name as witty as Darth Cupcake's!

 

[Jrsy Boy]

Granted, but you wake up with a long beard and realize you've been asleep for 100 years!

I wish I had a screen name as witty as Darth Cupcake's!

Granted...but now every thread you post on gets hijacked by people telling you what a witty screen name you have.

I wish I could get tags for my friends ImMarcik, Jsme and LuluLovesDisney .

 

[bevtoy]

Granted...but now every thread you post on gets hijacked by people telling you what a witty screen name you have.

I wish I could get tags for my friends ImMarcik, Jsme and LuluLovesDisney .

Granted, but the tags are Huey, Duey and Luey

I wish to win the lottery

 

[MrsKreamer]

Granted, but the tags are Huey, Duey and Luey

I wish to win the lottery

Granted but by the time the government takes out taxes you only get $1, and the lottery ticket cost $5.

I wish I could lose this baby weight faster!

 

[Shel]

Granted, but you get pregnant right away again.

I wish I had a hot date with Johnny Depp tonight.

 

[duchess_tisha]

Granted but by the time the government takes out taxes you only get $1, and the lottery ticket cost $5.

I wish I could lose this baby weight faster!

Granted, but just in time to find out you are pregnant with TRIPLETS.

I wish I was riding POTC right now...

 

[juligrl]

Granted, but you get pregnant right away again.

I wish I had a hot date with Johnny Depp tonight.

Granted, but it's literally a "hot date" and just as he gets to your door to pick you up he passes out from heat exhaustion.

Granted, but just in time to find out you are pregnant with TRIPLETS.

I wish I was riding POTC right now...

Granted, but the ride seriously malfunctions and you somehow get diverted to IASW where you then get stuck for 24hrs.

I wish I could fly.

 

[Grumpy's Wife]

I wish I could fly.

Granted but now you have wings and one is broken.

I wish the kitchen would clean itself.