Trouble with spouses?

[skorpie]

My DH was really not a "believer" in WDW/DVC, but bought me our DVC membership as a 25th Anniversary gift. However tonight, when I was proposing the plan for this June's trip, he started with "I really don't understand your obsession with WDW". He really knows that I can't help myself (maybe therapy is in order!!). I had plannd to take our DD (12) for a 2 week trip and he was to join us for the second week. We went a total of 3 times in 2003 because of free airline tickets and really low airfares. I am also using free tickets for this June's trip. Does anyone else have a spouse that occasionally gives you grief about your trips to WDW? You folks are my "support group" and I need HELP! Thanks!

 

[pmcpmc]

don't rise to the bait

 

[disneyberry]

don't worry, there are plenty of us here with similar problems.
my dbf used to be a Disney fan, in fact at one point he was a bigger fan than me.
then he claims "the brainwashing" wore off (he attended a corporate training week in the Disney Insitute once years ago).

even worse, over the years i became more obsessed with Disney + WDW. the DISboards sure don't help! LOL
so now because my obsession keeps growing, my dbf is really starting to hate Disney more and more...
he's been bothering me about selling our DVC (and we only just bought it 9 mos ago!), so i can stop obsessively planning our vacations out years in advance.
my response to that is, "hm... sell? i was thinking about buying some more points instead."
okay, that's my rant of the day...

btw, i'm not sure what the "don't rise to the bait" is in regards to...

 

[pirateeast]

How about just replace the non believers with a believer.?




Hey just a thought, there are a few of us single believers out here.

 

[Simba's Mom]

I'm going to assume that this will be your first DVC trip. If so, be careful, things might change. I came back after our first trip as DVC members telling everyone how "DVC gave me a new DH". For 15 years, he tolerated my Disney obsession and grudgingly went along occassionally. But after our first DVC trip, he actually had a smile on his face. Next May we return to OKW. The other night he said (and I thought I'd fall over in shock-I'm still getting used to this new DH), "Well, somehow we'll get to WDW next year, even if I have to walk-but I'm not hooked or anything." DVC has really changed my previously Disney-tolerant (barely) DH.

 

[Desperado]

I don't think it is a spouse problem, but a man problem. After all:

MENtal illness

MENstrual cramps

MENtal breakdown

MENopause

GUYnecologist

AND

When there's REAL trouble, it's a HISterectomy.

Ever notice how all of women's problems start with MEN?



My advice, don't force him or push him, just have wonderful vacations together and let that win him over. Men are slower...

 

[wilderness01]

 

[Dean]

I say leave him. You can likely find a more compatible mate on this board.

 

[Lisa P.]

The more you talk about it and obsess about it, the more you're likely to push him away. Be careful - that's not worth it!

Find those things that he does (or might) enjoy about WDW which are not really so "Disney," so theme park - just fun. Boating? Golf? Tennis? Restaurants? Romantic walks together? ESPN sports bar? Dancing with you? Dueling pianos or comedy? Bicycling or FW trail walks? The Speedway? There must be some things!

Then, whenever you want to share some planning with him, show him that you are considering his interests by asking if he might like to try one of those when you are there next June. Avoid going on about Disney this & that, whatever specifically you've talked about the most, recently. If he sees that you think of it as fun for you both, together and not just "your thing," you're less likely to hear complaints. Remember, if you weren't a biker babe and all he seemed to talk about was his Harley and bike week at some favored location, you'd get tired of it too.

Let your future fun vacations together speak for themselves. There's more to life at home with him than planning a vacation! You sure can and should "help yourself" and your marriage. Keep your perspective and it'll pay off in the long run!

 

[ClarabelleCow]

My DH loves Disney, but not as much as I do, so when I started thinking about DVC, I set a trap!!!! Got the video and info, left it out, would leave mailings in the bathroom, when we would stay at Vero as a hotel guest, I would just leave all the literature out around. Then I got serious, bought Disney Sheets!! Figured if he would go to bed each night with Winnie, Tigger and Eyeore on his pillow, he would be thinking Disney! Then I rented points and stayed at OKW, though I love VWL or even the Epcot area, I new his passion is golf, so why not rent on a golf course!!! It worked, we now own 225 points!!! And I don't think he even new what hit him!!! But, I also didn't put up any fuss when a 1968 Shelby GT500 rolled into the garage, just smiled nicely!!!

 

[Ms. WDW]

Oh My Gosh!!! My husband has another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!

DH and I have been to WDW more times than we could remember. He actually asked me to marry him while standing on the dock of the Poly waiting for the launch to come! But he didn't have that "obsession" like I did. And there came a time he just "got tired of the Mouse" as he put it.

He actually purchased into the DVC for me and DS! He's never even been to the BWV to even see his investment!!! He doesn't hate WDW. He just doesn't have that "love" for it as I do.

But this summer I am finally getting him down there. He's going to finally see the Boardwalk and everything else in WDW that's new. Keep in mind now, he hasn't been there since 1993???? So for him, there's lots of new stuff to see!

 

[stacy6552]

I really want to take a trip to see friends in England. Everytime we start discussing our next trip my husband asks if I really think the kids want to see Big Ben more than Mickey....and off to WDW we go.

 

[tripletvan]

I have a friend who doesn't even have her DH on the deed and she takes her 2 DD's with her once a year and leaves him home fishing!I tried to do that with DH but he had a fit and decided to join us!
I had an issue with my DH so I just went in with my mom when she wanted to buy. I send her a check once a month and we are always on vacation together anyway so it works out. DH thinks till this day that it is hers alone but has finally come around after four years and 5 vacations with DVC that it may be "worth looking into"! He HE HE!
So keep your chin up there are many like us out there.
Persistance!

 

[Stelson]

My DH always said I was Disney crazy, but when I started wanting to buy DVC & spending time on the boards, he said thats enough. He didn't want to hear about it, didn't think I should be on the boards, and did not want to purchase DVC.

Now DH coaches HS Football & basketball & is always watching a game or ESPN talking about a game, or playing fantisy football, when not coaching. I just asked him, Do you tell me about practice every night, Do I go to your games, Do I complain about the TV always turned to a game? No, it makes you happy, and Disney makes me happy. Do you want me to be happy?

He is great now, I limit my info shared with mainly things he would be interested in - like how close BWV is to ESPN club, and things I just have to share. We even made a deal, I get DVC & he can build a rec room any way he wants.

 

[joepoe]

Originally posted by skorpie
My DH was really not a "believer" in WDW/DVC, but bought me our DVC membership as a 25th Anniversary gift. However tonight, when I was proposing the plan for this June's trip, he started with "I really don't understand your obsession with WDW". He really knows that I can't help myself (maybe therapy is in order!!). I had plannd to take our DD (12) for a 2 week trip and he was to join us for the second week. We went a total of 3 times in 2003 because of free airline tickets and really low airfares. I am also using free tickets for this June's trip. Does anyone else have a spouse that occasionally gives you grief about your trips to WDW? You folks are my "support group" and I need HELP! Thanks!

My advice is to dump him. Mixed marriages rarely work!

 

[Maistre Gracey]

Oh how fortunate I am, as my wife is essentially as big a Disney fanatic as I am.

MG

 

[joepoe]

Originally posted by Desperado
I don't think it is a spouse problem, but a man problem. After all:
MENtal illness
MENstrual cramps
MENtal breakdown
MENopause
GUYnecologist
AND
When there's REAL trouble, it's a HISterectomy.
Ever notice how all of women's problems start with MEN?

My advice, don't force him or push him, just have wonderful vacations together and let that win him over. Men are slower...

Hey, I can't defend my gender! My DW is lucky, as I also "get" the magic and enjoy the family vacations we are having. Sometimes I get input overload when I am there, but I grin and bear it for the sake of my wife and kids, since the alternative is to go somewhere else and not have as much fun doing things together, IMHO. Other vacation spots do not have the wide variety of activities for kids that Disney has- they just don't.

 

[Candlelady]

My other half doesn't 'get it' either. He almost wouldn't sign for DVC until I let him know that I didn't need his signature, I could qualify by myself. I also had to gently remind him that I put up with the building he rents to play with his stereo, instuments, and recording equipment. That changed his mind rather quickly as he knows I've rarely, if ever, given him grief about the amount of money all those 'toys' cost.

He joins us every other trip and that works out for both of us. We've been together for years and both understand that we don't always enjoy the same things. I have my Disney fix which is DVC, and he has his 'clubhouse' for his music. We're both happy.

To be honest, I have a better time at Disney without him and that's OK. He just doesn't see and feel the magic like I do so he doesn't need to go as often.

 

[Lesley]

LOL....I don't think I'd be into WDW at all if it wasn't for my dh. He's the one who started it! And he complains now that he's "homesick" when we're not at WDW.

Honestly, he's the big WDW fan in the family....I'm just an obsessive planner. So the combination works for us!

 

[JimC]

We both enjoy Disney. Our first trip together was to the Contemporary on our honeymoon. That was 25 years ago. Over the years, Disney became our favorite regular vacation location.