Tough Decision...Advice Please?!

[VolleyballQt07]

So, as my username gives away, I play volleyball. I've been playing since I was in 5th grade and I'm currently a junior in high school; so 7 years. I have been on Varsity the past two years and I have been playing up an age level in J.O. volleyball for the past 4 years.... You can say I'm obsessed with volleyball and that it is my life. But I have a dilema...

I don't know whether or not I should play this season or not. It's getting to the point where I've been up all night thinking about this. I have a few reasons for both sides of my problem. The positives of playing are it's my senior year....and sadly, that's kind of it. The negatives lists is a bit longer. For one, the coach is one of the biggest *insert bad word, you pick* in the world. He plays favorites and does not recognize any talent other than his daughter's...and he's not the most encouraging person. He told me I was not Varsity material, I wasn't even JV material yet 3 months later I earned Offensive Player of the Year on my J.O. team in which I played ONE YEAR UP! Ugh! Anywho.. Our high school volleyball program is very political. I don't mean to sound big headed or anything but I'm one of the better players overall...if not the best and most experienced. But my coach does not recognize that and when other parents mention me or my playing to him he shrugs it off or changes the subject. My parents have a strong hate for him and they are two of the most caring people in the world...

Also, I really want to focus on school. I am taking to AP classes as well as 3 college classes next year. PLUS, I work 5 times a week. Volleyball on top of that would be an overload I cannot handle. I have a very high and unhealthy stress level... But my major requires a lot of time and dedication, as well as good grades. So I really need to focus on school.

In the past season, I did not learn anything, other than I'm "useless and not a strong contributor" to the team, when I lead in kills....figure that one out. The girls on the team are very dramatic, and they have huge attitudes, which I cannot stand dealing with, yet they get to play because they are liked by the coach.

Finally, playing collegiate is out of the question.. The school I'm going to has an awful volleyball program, it doesn't offer any scholarships, and you only play if you're "well-known". Plus I want to focus on doing well in school and getting out as soon as possible... So I don't need to impress any college coaches.

Sorry that was so long. Anyways, my question is, if you were in my position, what would you do?! I could really use all the help I could get. My parents and my friends support me, whatever I decide to do. The thing is...I don't know WHAT to do. Help. :/

Thanks!

 

[WestCOT]

Well the most important thing to remember is that even if you don't play volleyball this year, it doesn't mean that you'll never play again. If you love it, pick it back up down the road.

But yes, what I'm leading up to is that it sounds to me as though the volleyball program at your school is a toxic environment that's keeping you from being happy and successful. When you're the best player on the team and the coach (the one person concerned with the team who's supposed to be the most in your corner!) doesn't even want to acknowledge it, it's time to let it go, because it's not going to get any better. I've dealt with similar situations in class environments, which can be really tough because there are just some classes that you can't drop. Removing negative stuff from your life is the best thing you can do.

If I was in your shoes, I would have quit volleyball a year or two ago: it sounds like you only keep playing because of your long ties to the game and how much you like the game itself. It's just sad when people like the coach and the other players have to come in and ruin the game you're playing. People like that are really bad and really tough on your psyche.

I'd recommend dropping volleyball for the year. Do well in school, and enjoy what free time you have. Senior year goes by too fast anyway and they do tend to like to pile on the assignments because it's supposed to "prepare you for university." For this year, you're likely better off without volleyball.

And if you do love volleyball like you say you do, then don't let anything stop you from playing it casually, with friends and family or even with a self-organized small team, at any time throughout the next year and into the future. Volleyball is a great game, and sports can be wonderful fun even when not played competitively.

 

[VolleyballQt07]

Thank you. Very much. Everything you said is 100% right. The only time I was happy while playing volleyball in high school was my freshman year, when I had a different coach. Your advice helped relieve some of the stress I have been dealing with and because of it, my decision not to play just became a little more official. Thanks again.

 

[PirateSnowmen]

I say drop volleyball. It doesn't sound like its worth the hassle, especially if you aren't going to play in college. Once you get to college check to see if they have intramurals. You might be able to sign up and play volleyball that way if you really enjoy it.

 

[Sparx]

I'd quit volleyball. You're not playing it in college, there's no reason to stay in this toxic environment.

When I was a senior, I quit 4H, something I'd been doing since the 4th grade. I was so heavily involved, and I put all of my free time towards it. Once I quit, I realized how toxic it was. I didn't have ANY friends and everyone used me to get their own stuff done, but they never treated me well. Even the "adults" that were in charge just ridiculed me when I wasn't there to answer their every whim. I was SO much happier without it, and I don't regret quitting at all. I had so much more time to commit to other things in my life (that I actually enjoyed)

 

[yellowlabforever]

I experienced the exact same thing my junior year. I was in volleyball, and it was not a good situation that I was in. I was playing since sixth grade. There were numerous reasons why volleyball was a toxic environment for me, and I had a tough decision to make. I was taking an AP class the next year, and I was planning on being in a bunch of different bands and orchestras which would eat up my time.

I ended up choosing not to play this year, and it was a good decision for me. I was able to better concentrate on my studies, and I took a college-course as well. I wouldn't call it quitting, because quitting is something that someone does in the middle of the season when there are still games going on. I'd call it taking a break, because you can play volleyball in college as well (intermurals).

Don't stress over it. The best decision will come to you, and you don't need to obsess over it. Just think it over occasionally, and something will happen that will push you one way or the other.

,

 

[dwonderz]

I would say stop. The coach just sounds mean and if you really love volleyball and don't think your other resoponsibilities (school, etc.) would be too much - maybe you could find a way to play volleyball elsewhere (if you wanted to)?

 

[snowyjoey]

i have that same problem at my school the school and town is so small your either the coaches daughter, have influential parents or are getting screwed over. i get screwed because they judge me on apperence. i say if the coach isn't letting you play stop and see how the season goes without you. this is my first year in sports where it matters and trust me i didn't get played. my sport is basketball and we had the new coach. but when the team started losing he put me in cause he saw me at practice making all the shots. so really if he sees your good at practice i say go out. god this is a hard question but if your good at something i say forget the guy and just give it your all at practice and if he sees that guess who will get played

 

[VolleyballQt07]

I experienced the exact same thing my junior year. I was in volleyball, and it was not a good situation that I was in. I was playing since sixth grade. There were numerous reasons why volleyball was a toxic environment for me, and I had a tough decision to make. I was taking an AP class the next year, and I was planning on being in a bunch of different bands and orchestras which would eat up my time.

I ended up choosing not to play this year, and it was a good decision for me. I was able to better concentrate on my studies, and I took a college-course as well. I wouldn't call it quitting, because quitting is something that someone does in the middle of the season when there are still games going on. I'd call it taking a break, because you can play volleyball in college as well (intermurals).

Don't stress over it. The best decision will come to you, and you don't need to obsess over it. Just think it over occasionally, and something will happen that will push you one way or the other.

,

my only problem is i don't want to regret making the wrong decision. i don't want to play but end up being miserable...and i don't not want to play and miss out on everything...good or bad. right now i'm leaning towards not playing...but i still haven't fully made up my mind.

i have that same problem at my school the school and town is so small your either the coaches daughter, have influential parents or are getting screwed over. i get screwed because they judge me on apperence. i say if the coach isn't letting you play stop and see how the season goes without you. this is my first year in sports where it matters and trust me i didn't get played. my sport is basketball and we had the new coach. but when the team started losing he put me in cause he saw me at practice making all the shots. so really if he sees your good at practice i say go out. god this is a hard question but if your good at something i say forget the guy and just give it your all at practice and if he sees that guess who will get played

the problem is, in practice he treats me even worse. like i said in my first post, at practice he told me i was not varsity material..and that i wasn't even jv material. i literally went home after that practice and cried myself to sleep.


thank you everyone though, for your advice. it's really helping make this decision a lot easier!

 

[iNeedGlee]

If I were you, I would take a break.
Because......
Just because you quit your school team doesn't mean you have to quit volleyball period.
There are many other opportunities and community teams out there that can be compatible with your schedule.

 

[nicksmom87]

Some things to consider....

Do you want to play in college? If so, focus on club volleyball. College coaches RARELY see HS games, as the seasons are overlapping. Most college recruiting is done on the club circuit. If you don't want to play in college, it doesn't really matter what you decide to do. If you LOVE the sport, but not looking to be recruited for college, you can always play in a women's league, and be rid of your "insert bad word here" coach. It sounds like you already know what you want/need to do. It will be your ONLY senior year....make it the very best senior year you can. If that means NOT playing the sport you love at your school, sobeit. You can always keep playing, and enjoy it more than it sounds like you currently are. Good luck!

 

[VolleyballQt07]

Some things to consider....

Do you want to play in college? If so, focus on club volleyball. College coaches RARELY see HS games, as the seasons are overlapping. Most college recruiting is done on the club circuit. If you don't want to play in college, it doesn't really matter what you decide to do. If you LOVE the sport, but not looking to be recruited for college, you can always play in a women's league, and be rid of your "insert bad word here" coach. It sounds like you already know what you want/need to do. It will be your ONLY senior year....make it the very best senior year you can. If that means NOT playing the sport you love at your school, sobeit. You can always keep playing, and enjoy it more than it sounds like you currently are. Good luck!

Thank you

 

[KidGoofy]

I would say stick with it...I was in the same dilemma as you. Ive played through my basketball system since the 4th grade. He played me in the wrong position and when I had a chance in the right position I lost it to a lame excuse of I didn't play hard...meanwhile we beat the team by 40. But the feeling of accomplishing something you stuck to your whole life feels amazing especially if you have a Senior game.