Too many "Please don't flame me" openings.

[tvwalsh]

We all should think about the environment we are setting up on these boards when so many people think it is necessary to begin a thread with ,"Please don't flame me!"

 

[DisDaydreamer]

And who are YOU to be dictating....

Just kidding

Actually, I think flamming is down a bit.

I don't think this type of opening is the envorinment as much as the poster having comtemplated the responses to their post and going ahead with what they think might a volatile topic. I think the "don't flame me opening" is kind of saying "I am putting forward this, but not intending to be confrontational"... sometimes it helps.

I'm guessing you never visited a political message board... Now that's a bad environment. Everyone with their guns drawn environment.

JMHO Don't flame me.

 

[DVCconvert]

 

[CarolMN]

Perhaps there have been more posts beginning with a request not to be flamed lately, but I have not noticed any true "flaming" going on. Granted, I've been away from the boards for the last couple of weeks.

The mods do try to get rid of "flames" as soon as we see them.

At times, some posters seem to think that any post that does not share their opinion is a flame (or resort bashing). That's not the definition the DIS uses.

Personal attacks are definitley not welcome, but all respectfully stated opinions are.

 

[Budshark]

In general, and please don't flame me ,

I am a VERY VERY active member of several community boards - most dealing with technology. I am a VERY VERY active member of DVC. I find Disboards to be the #1 source of information for DVC, but of all the many boards I frequent I find this site to be the most "negative".

I don't know if its based on a more personal topic, or a user body that is less internet savy - but comments/winks/sarcasm here tends to not be understood and result in a large amount of "counter attacks". I also see a lot of comments taken WAY out of context and responded to, which tends to spin out of control and feed even more negativity.

Just my thoughts on why people are starting out with the "please don't..." comments. I've had those thoughts here as well, but haven't put that in the title/comments because when you post that it tends to send the track off on the wrong foot.

Chris

 

[MILLZ]

You are not alound to flame! These boards a censored. So saying your opinion isnt even an option. That is the reason I believe you dont see it as much as soon as you express an opinion thats not within the rules you get points on your record I actually feel like im in grade school again. At least this thread is new and not another WHY SO MANY RESALES AT SSR

 

[twinklebug]

The DVC boards are nothing compared to the community boards and even the transportation board can even take a nasty turn on occasion

I've been all over the web and moderated chat rooms for all kinds of companies and I'll agree that the Dis is one of the better places to be. There will always be folk everywhere that look to be combative.

What I find off here is the unusually high number of posters with an entitled attitude. It is definitely stronger here than most other boards. I guess Disney does that to some folk?

One of my very first posts on the Dis years back was asking for help in getting my best friend through the loss of her niece so she could enjoy Disney (their last trip before that had been through make a wish). I immediately had response posters telling me telling me my GF should just be glad she gets to go to Disney every year. OK, there are people who don't really *read* posts before replying either... but again, that happens everywhere.

 

[Deb & Bill]

The ones that start out with please don't flame me, usually are people who are stating the fact that they intend to break the rules and want some confirmation that others have broken the same rule. Whether it's the "my child is three/four, but looks two" or "we are having seven people stay in our room at All Stars Movies" or "I'm getting such a good deal on the partially used tickets". Most of the time they already know what they are planning on doing is wrong, but we need to look the other way because they are special.

 

[Budshark]

Most of the time they already know what they are planning on doing is wrong, but we need to look the other way because they are special.

Uh oh... here we go in the please don't flame me thread... but ...

IMO this is part of the problem. I know there are some trends in posts, but a lot of times I see the casual poster come in and ask a question that apparently has some history on the board. Oh the poor poster... they get slammed immediately and have no idea why!

We have to look at each person independently and put all the other posts in the past. Sometimes people ask the question because they just don't know... sometimes they do it to see if they can start a war... sometimes they are just curious if anyone has ever done something... but as members in the community we really really have to look at each post independently. That would go a LONG way to helping the newer members avoid stepping into a trap...

Chris

 

[bobbiwoz]

When I see those words, I figure it's an SSR owner who wants to stay somewhere else. I think people here have been pretty hard on SSR, the resort.
I read the posts, but would tend to ignore thereafter rather than flame.

Bobbi

 

[Deb & Bill]

Uh oh... here we go in the please don't flame me thread... but ...

IMO this is part of the problem. I know there are some trends in posts, but a lot of times I see the casual poster come in and ask a question that apparently has some history on the board. Oh the poor poster... they get slammed immediately and have no idea why!...

The first timer wouldn't start out "Please don't flame me", it's the poster who already knows what they are about to ask is wrong or against the rules and they are seeking confirmation. I do agree that there are many unsuspecting newcomers posting for the first or almost first time who get flamed because they asked one of the hot button questions.

I just read the post on this board that started "please don't flame me, but I didn't care for SSR". No problem with that in my book. But there are some pretty opinionated people on the DIS. I think it's the posters who start out with " XXX is the worst resort because..." who might get flamed rather quickly, rather than "I didn't care for XXX because..." Trying to state an opinion as a fact is bound to light the flamethrower.

 

[Budshark]

The first timer wouldn't start out "Please don't flame me", it's the poster who already knows what they are about to ask is wrong or against the rules and they are seeking confirmation. I do agree that there are many unsuspecting newcomers posting for the first or almost first time who get flamed because they asked one of the hot button questions.

I just read the post on this board that started "please don't flame me, but I didn't care for SSR". No problem with that in my book. But there are some pretty opinionated people on the DIS. I think it's the posters who start out with " XXX is the worst resort because..." who might get flamed rather quickly, rather than "I didn't care for XXX because..." Trying to state an opinion as a fact is bound to light the flamethrower.

Thats fair, although its quite possible for a newbie whos been reading a lot on the board to start out with a please don't flame me... We all have our pet peaves and people/comments that set us off. We just have to be cautious to not generalize or assume too much. Either post in a helpful/answering manner or ignore the thread... I think this would go a long way towards addressing the OP concerns about the overall environment.

Chris

 

[Dean]

Often they are thread's with a controversial subject and know it's possible to get things going. Also, many seem to perceive disagrement with flames. If one can't stand posts in disagreement, they simply shouldn't post at all as that is the nature of BBS. While I could say that a certain respect to the OP and their requests is in order, it seems too many think they can limit the type of posts to the ones they want in a given thread, sometimes inappropriately so.

 

[dudelydude]

The first timer wouldn't start out "Please don't flame me"

You guys just reminded me of a recent thread that I read...you all probably read it too. It was posted by (what seemed to be) a first timer. She had many posts, but mostly all on the non-DVC portions of the DIS. She asked, "Why so many SSR resales?" A few respondents stood in a circle around her, emptied their gas cans onto her and lit a match. This poor person was innocently asking a question and had NO idea how much that question has been asked and what it means to some people. She was blind-sided by people who thought that maybe she was antagonizing or trying to incite a riot. I felt bad for her and explained the situation. When we spend so much time on these boards with so many people that are DVC Disboard regulars, we sometimes forget that there will be people making their very first appearance who don't know some of the hot issues, jargon, acronyms, etc. Some people simply need to be more patient.

 

[bookwormde]

From what I have seen DIS is very mild as far as personal attacks and the moderators do a good job of keeping that way. The more ”public” portions are a little worse but as for DVC while we have our family disagreements but we are still all part of a “family” (DVC) that we love even though it frustrates us some time.

bookwormde

 

[CarolA]

IMHO the DVC boards are amoung the least friendly boards on the DIS.

...

I know people who find the atmosphere on the DVC boards so rough they don't post at all!

 

[DisDaydreamer]

Uh oh... here we go in the please don't flame me thread... but ...

IMO this is part of the problem. I know there are some trends in posts, but a lot of times I see the casual poster come in and ask a question that apparently has some history on the board. Oh the poor poster... they get slammed immediately and have no idea why!

We have to look at each person independently and put all the other posts in the past. Sometimes people ask the question because they just don't know... sometimes they do it to see if they can start a war... sometimes they are just curious if anyone has ever done something... but as members in the community we really really have to look at each post independently. That would go a LONG way to helping the newer members avoid stepping into a trap...

Chris

Hey Chris... not flaming you, but I would like to offer some of my perspective. You're basically lecturing people, many with many thousands and tens of thousands of posts, and many of whom have been members for many years before I or you ever even heard of the DISboards. I wouldn't try to tell these core members how to best act on these boards any more than I would try to tell them how to raise their children. At least not until I have 5 digits in my post count.

Dudelydude... I just looked back at 8 threads concerning the very issue. I did not find one that had the OP getting torched. However, there were times when the follow-ups got into it with each other. It happens. It also happens that people TROLL and start these threads of a sensitive or passionate nature and then watch it for fun. It happens all the time.

All-in-all I find these boards entertaining and informative. If it were only the latter I probably wouldn't be posting this response. The mods do a good job and the community does a good job of policing inappropriate behavior.

 

[parlay]

Unfortunately I have to agree that these boards are not the most welcoming. My join date is April of 2007, but I've been lurking since 2004, and you can see I only have 30+ posts. And this is a direct result of the atmosphere, and to be fair it could just be my perception of the atmosphere. (If I have an opinion or a question that could even remotely be controversial I post on another board.) But back on point, there are more than just a few people who, IMHO, need to give people the benefit of the doubt and learn a little patience.

With that being said, I find these boards to be filled with a wealth of information from extremely knowledgeable and generous people willing to share their expertise - Thank you.

 

[WolfpackFan]

I think what bugs me about some of these threads is, if the people had just done a little bit of research they would observe that some of these topics have been discussed to death. For instance the person who asks "why so many SSR resales", I remember when the last one came out if the OP had just scrolled down a page or two he would have seen an identical thread already started. This seems to happen so often. I'm not trying to censure anyone, but I do get tired of reading the same thing over and over to the point that I just scan the thread titles and only go into the ones that seem genuinely interesting or informative. Another pet peeve are the threads that begin "should I buy DVC". I can't believe someone would ask a bunch of total strangers their opinion as to whether they should make such a major financial decision. People should do their homework first and then ask specific questions if they have any. Now please don't flame me for this .

 

[Dean]

I think what bugs me about some of these threads is, if the people had just done a little bit of research they would observe that some of these topics have been discussed to death. For instance the person who asks "why so many SSR resales", I remember when the last one came out if the OP had just scrolled down a page or two he would have seen an identical thread already started. This seems to happen so often. I'm not trying to censure anyone, but I do get tired of reading the same thing over and over to the point that I just scan the thread titles and only go into the ones that seem genuinely interesting or informative. Another pet peeve are the threads that begin "should I buy DVC". I can't believe someone would ask a bunch of total strangers their opinion as to whether they should make such a major financial decision. People should do their homework first and then ask specific questions if they have any. Now please don't flame me for this .

I admit that it does get tiring answering the same questions time after time however, I realize that it's difficult to search and get a good perspective, even with a fully functioning search feature. Thus I do not hold it againts anyone that posts the same question we see every few weeks. I may not answer if I'm feeling tired but I would never chastise them for asking simply because it's a repeat. OTOH, I don't mind giving a perspective on threads like "Do we get free dining with DVC". Any negative comments would be the same first time or 1000th.