Told the school today...

[kldmom2000]

Our district is very, very strict. I went to my DD's 1st grade orientation last week and I was going to tell her teacher that night about our trip this Sept.29-Oct. 4. Before I had the chance, she gave her speech and told all the parents that she does not allow family vacations during the course of the school year. It's being pushed by the superintendant, the principal, and the teachers as well I've been sick to my stomach trying to think of how to word this letter to send in this week. My DH is self-employed and due to the nature of his job, cannot take off any time during school vacations We've had a rough year medically (my DD's and myself) and we really need this trip. My DD will miss 4 days of 1st grade and I don't intend on doing it again now that I know the ramifications.... I just hope that we don't start the school year off poorly with this teacher I can't cancel either or I lose $710 in airfare, $160 in MNSSHP tix, and $100 on the hotel pkg... almost $1000!!!!

 

[BeccaGrace]

I am dreading having to tell the school and we aren't even going until '08!

My youngest DD has special needs and she is in summer school most of the summer and in August when she is off we can't go to Florida because of the heat (one of her medications makes her unable to sweat and cool off naturally; so we need to go during a cooler time period).

I dread going during Jersey week because of the crowds and higher prices (not to mention that it's still missing 3 1/2 days and parent teacher conferences)...we'd like to go the 1st week of December like last time because it was cheaper, low crowds and we had perfect weather for her.

However, the threat of unexcused absences is making me feel like a criminal for even trying to go that week! It's so sad that I'm already stressing about this two years in advance. I'm tempted to bring it up during one of her IEP meetings to see what her child study team suggests; hopefully if they see my point of view it won't be as much of an issue with the school.

 

[Beth E. (NJ)]

kldmom2000 -- the teacher "does not allow" family vacations during the school year? what does she think she would do -- send you to your room? LOL

I feel for you, but I wouldn't "allow" her to alter my plans.

 

[kldmom2000]

kldmom2000 -- the teacher "does not allow" family vacations during the school year? what does she think she would do -- send you to your room? LOL

I feel for you, but I wouldn't "allow" her to alter my plans.

Yes-I was quite SHOCKED to hear her say that... I was literally waiting for her to say she was just kidding..... but the principal of our elementary school has this thing about wanting to be #1 for attendance in the district. There are 16 public schools in our city and we always fall in 2nd or 3rd place. My DD had perfect attendance last year in Kindergarten, but my neighbor called her DD out on a couple of occasions. Once, the principal answered and she gave my neighbor the 3rd degree. She said if her DD did not have a fever and was not throwing up or complaining of diarrhea, she should be in school The superintendant and school board just instituted a policy where you cannot have more than 10 absences during the school year or else you will automatically be held back I wish I had the patience to homeschool!!!!!

 

[PaMom001]

And the states are coming down hard because they will lose some federal funding if they don't follow what the feds want. But

My DD and DS's school district allow 2 "Educational" trips per year not totaling more than 5 days. So when I take my kids out of 4th and 2nd grade, in 17 days , they will not be marked as unexcused as long as I notify them at least one week in advance.

DisneyDad, you and I must live very close together. My DD went to Disney in 2nd and 4th grade and both times were educational trips. I filled out the form and wrote down things like map reading, orientation in the parks on the map(think "you are here"). I never had any problems.

 

[disnutt]

I am dreading having to tell the school and we aren't even going until '08!

However, the threat of unexcused absences is making me feel like a criminal for even trying to go that week! It's so sad that I'm already stressing about this two years in advance. I'm tempted to bring it up during one of her IEP meetings to see what her child study team suggests; hopefully if they see my point of view it won't be as much of an issue with the school.

Like others have said before, this is part of the reason I started homeschooling this year. The erosion of parental rights to make decisions about their own children is getting ridiculous and scary.

 

[emh1129]

This is so irritating..
Like someone else said, I'M the parent, I make the decisions for my child!
DS will be in his second year of preschool this year and I don't think they are going to give me a problem.. I'm planning to homeschool after that and threads like this one make me more secure in my decision!

 

[tarheelmjfan]

I can understand them being hesitant for students that are struggling in school, but my son is on the honor roll and is listed as one of Ohio's gifted children. I doubt a week of fun at Disney will cause any damage. Sorry, just got ranted and couldn't stop

I know exactly what you're saying, but thought I'd offer a different perspective. My DS is also considered "gifted". (As his parent, I think that sounds so snobby. ) He's in HS this year with all Honors classes, except gym. In elementary & middle school, our county does have the type of policy you wish for. As long as a child is a good student, & can still make the school & teacher look good by scoring in the top percentile on state tests, they can miss as much as they want. Poor students get grief for being sick. Hey, it worked for us!!! Then one of our many vacations was a week visiting family in NC. My nephew who is the same age as my son was heartbroken because his principal wouldn't allow him to miss one day to stay home with my DS who happened to be missing 5 for that trip. My nephew struggles in school, & felt that he wasn't as good as my DS, because he couldn't even miss one day. After that, my DS still missed for vacations (too often really), but I never felt the criteria was quite fair. Now that he's in HS, the party's over. I'm glad we took him out, when we could.

On the subject of tuxes, my DS wore his 1st tux at 8 months old. It was also on a cruise. He was dressed identically to his dad. He looked so cute & everyone stopped us to tell us how adorable he was.

 

[talie95]

My dd's school is also pretty strict. My dd just started Kindergarten so I haven't had any experience yet with the school and taking her out for vacations. Before school started we were making our plans for DL from OCT. 2-4 and we were going to take her out of school for that. Then at orientation a couple days before school started we got the school "guidlines" and after 3 unexcused absences(only illness or death in the family is considered excused) you get sent to some Attendance Board for review. I couldn't believe it! I was still going to take her out regardless b/c she's my daughter and if we want 3 days to be together than that's our perogative! Then I looked at the school calendar and saw that we had our fall break from Oct. 2-6 so I felt so relieved! It's like the Gods were telling us to go to DL at that time. Anyway, I don't see why the schools have to come down so hard on everyone. Going on vacations IS educational! Kids see and learn sooo much from being in new and different environments. I remember when I was a kid we had field trips all the time and now it's all "bookwork". They plan 1 or maybe 2 field trips for the entire school year.....give me a break!!!

 

[kerry34]

Wow! I cannot believe the grief some of you have to take. Anytime I have notified my kids schools in the past about trips, the teachers have been very good about it. The kids made up their work and that was the end of it. I guess it just depends on the district and teachers. We are opting to take our next trip during April vacation, but the kids will be missing two days of school. One day before vacation and one day after because we are driving. I am laughing to myself about it now because my SIL just became the principal of my son's elementary school. In the past she had made comments about how bad it was of me to take my kids out of school for a vacation. When she sent home a informational letter at the beginning of this school year she had written in bold and underlined letters that vacations during the school year are strongly discouraged. DH and I both agreed that was probably directed right at us. LOL. Oh well. What can you do except live a little I say.

 

[3DisneyKids]

Wow, I never realized I was so lucky. Our district does not blink at absences due to vacation. I'm sure if a kid missed 20 or so days throughout the course of a year they might...but for a one week vacation...they APPLAUD it. They think that time spent with the family is as valuable--if not more--than time spent in school. And yes, this is a public school.

I should mention, maybe, that this is an extremely family-oriented community, where the majority of moms are SAHMs, volunteer in the school, etc. I just went to DS's 2nd grade parent orientation night, and of the 16 kids in his class, 14 of the moms (or dads) will be in the classroom volunteering for at least 1.5 hours per week. Maybe this is part of the reason that the school is so lenient about absences due to vacation? They assume that since the parents are actively involved in the classroom, that those parents will also make sure that school is a priority and actively work with the kids on academics at home, etc.

In any case, I am sorry to hear that so many get a hard time from schools when trying to do something so special for the family! Good luck to all--

 

[HeatherC]

KLD2000 - Don't tell them. Who are they to dictate this. Just go and then when you come home send in a note saying your child was sick. How would they prove your child wasn't sick?

Don't get wrong, I don't advocate lying. But ridiculous rules like this just annoy me so much. I think as I get older, I really refuse to explain my and dh's decisions to anyone.

Best of luck to you! And....have a wonderful trip!!!!

HeatherC

 

[3DisneyKids]

KLD2000 - Don't tell them. Who are they to dictate this. Just go and then when you come home send in a note saying your child was sick. How would they prove your child wasn't sick?

Don't get wrong, I don't advocate lying. But ridiculous rules like this just annoy me so much. I think as I get older, I really refuse to explain my and dh's decisions to anyone.

Best of luck to you! And....have a wonderful trip!!!!

HeatherC

Please don't set your kid up like this. If he has just returned from WDW, hw WILL talk about it at school. And if your send a note saying he was sick while he is talking about his trip....

Not the way to go.

Good luck.

 

[disneyfan2kids]

...
I should mention, maybe, that this is an extremely family-oriented community, where the majority of moms are SAHMs, volunteer in the school, etc. ....

Sorry... sore spot for me ...it's not just the SAHM's that are family-oriented. Nor does being SAHM make you a more involved parent. Just as being a Working parent does not mean you are not involved.

I'm a working mommy (because I "want to" not because I "have to") and I'm still very involved in my kids lives and schooling.

(I'll get off my soapbox now...I feel the need to rant when anyone equates "SAHM" to a "better" mom in any way/shape/form. <exhale>

 

[DizChick05]

Wow. Thats harsh., My childs private school lets her take as many absences as she needs. I just cant belive your school is so harsh.

 

[ToyStory#1fan'sMom]

I told my ds' teacher last week that he will miss a week at the end of the month. She was extremely nice. Suggested I sign up for my week of snacks after we get back in case we find something neat there that ds would like to bring. It's kindergarten, she said there will be no homework to worry about, just take some pictures and let him bring them in one day when you're back so he can "educate" the class. She did say I had to write a letter for the office, so they would excuse the unexcused absences (unexcused absences gets you nasty notes until you get them excused) Anway, wrote a simple letter, just saying I had talked to ds' teacher and that I wanted to let them know why ds would be absent. The secretary gave me such attitude! Went on and on about how it was okay to take them out of elementary classes, but once he was in junior high we would have to rethink our vacation schedules. *Side note* we planned this trip BEFORE we knew ds was going to go to school this year, we were going to hold him back. Anyway, I was not happy with the way she acted, guess she's jealous!

Kate

 

[3DisneyKids]

...
I should mention, maybe, that this is an extremely family-oriented community, where the majority of moms are SAHMs, volunteer in the school, etc. ....

Sorry... sore spot for me ...it's not just the SAHM's that are family-oriented. Nor does being SAHM make you a more involved parent. Just as being a Working parent does not mean you are not involved.

I'm a working mommy (because I "want to" not because I "have to") and I'm still very involved in my kids lives and schooling.

(I'll get off my soapbox now...I feel the need to rant when anyone equates "SAHM" to a "better" mom in any way/shape/form. <exhale>

Never once did I say that SAHM's are better than any other type of parent. I simply said that this is a family-oriented community and a community with lots of SAHM's and a community with lots of involved parents. You made the leap about subjectivity on your own...you connected some dots where there were no connections to be made. Perpahps because this is a topic you are so passionate about and/or have had to defend in the past, but regardless, that is not how my post was intended. I am a WAHM, so I certainly would not say that SAHMs are better than those who work.

 

[makinorlando]

FL has really cracked down on unexcused absences. I guess it's taken seriously because there are too many parents that don't think it is necessary to send their children to school regularly.

I felt like a criminal last spring when I got a call from DDs school because she had 5 unexcused days - actually I had just not gotten the excuse in for two sick days that happened to of occured directly after three days I took her out of school to spend time with her cousin who was visiting over his spring break! I had the teacher's "blessing" on these days, and Tara made all the work up.

If I had not had an "excuse" ER and Dr. for the sick days- my name would have been turned over to the state officials! YIKES!

 

[tlmdisney]

I had read your post the other day and got nervous about telling my daughters teachers that we were going on vacation. Our responses were a little different then your. Both teachers told us to have a great trip.

 

[Cinderella_68]

We just told DS's teacher on Friday. She was not happy. Too bad. I already looked up the policies for both children's schools and they can each have up to 12 unexcused absences per year.
I notified my oldest child's case manager, she is special education, and he's okay with it. I'm just waiting to hear from the individual teachers, now.
We have lots of projects that we are doing while we are there, as well as doing their homework before our trip.
I just don't like that they are trying to make us feel like some kind of criminals for wanting to spend time with our children in a place we all love to be! The secretary at both schools looked at my like I'd grown another eye in the middle of my forehead. I know my children and I know they are smart enough to handle this, and they understand that going on vacation means more work, but they don't mind. It IS WDW, after all!