Toddler "leash"

[Tigger&Belle]

beaglegirl1, you're obviously respectful of others, which is all I expect from any poster. It's nice to agree to disagree without getting hostile. Pulling a child around with the harness is dangerous for both the child and any other people around who might get tangled in the harness.


asktriplets, wow, three 1yo's? Do you take energy boosters to get you through the day? Yes, I'd use the harnesses, too, if I were you. Any time parents are outnumbered, especially by 1yo's you need all the help you can get.

T&B

 

[POOH&PIGLET]

i know everyone just wants this topic to end

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Originally posted by POOH&PIGLET

As long as people are discussing things reasonably and respectfully I'm not sure what the issue is.

T&B

 

[erinz]

Sorry, I just had to add my 2 cents....

First of all, I think we can all agree that a 1 or 2 yr old is not going to walk around on a leash saying to themselves " leashes are really for animals....this is so degrading!". They are just thinking something like, "oh, I guess I can't go as far as I want, I don't like this!".

Causing a child to feel uncomfortable with forced boundaries is not cruel, nor is it treating them like an animal.

The feeling that leashes are just for animals, or are cruel, come from the minds of the adults.

So, the bottom line is, if we had to choose, do we want to avoid the possibility that other adults will perceive us as cruel, or do we want to make sure our children are as safe as possible?

And by the way, are we being cruel when we put our 1yr olds in "cages" at night?

Just something to think about...

 

[WDWFAN9]

well, I've skimmed this entire thread and haven't read anything about the use of a leash/harness as a deterent. On the first night of one of our extended family WDW trips we all met in my Mom and Dad's room to go over expectations and plans - my kids had been well prepped before arrival at CBR, but we wanted ALL the kids (10 ranging in age from 15 to 6)to hear the expectations about their behavior at the same time. One of the biggies was the importance of staying with the group. At home my sister's boys had a tendency to wander off, and we did not want to have to worry about that at WDW. Not that we were worried about their safety, they were old enough not to get scared if they became separated from us, but because we did not want to waste valuable park time looking for them because they decided to head in a different directions as we were all walking along. Anyway, at that meeting my Mom pulled out a couple of those wrist leashes and stated that anyone who did not stay with the group would spend the rest of the trip tethered to her wheelchair (which she used because she couldn't walk the distances that the parks require). Those boys never strayed during our entire trip!!

I've never used a harness or leash for any of my four kids at WDW, mostly because they were content to ride in a stroller. I did however use a harness the summer I was pregnant with my fourth. The oldest two were playing baseball/softball and the third was only 18 months old. It is one thing to sit in a moving stroller, but quite another to spend over an hour in one at a ball game. I was continually following her around making sure she was safe and I was absolutely exhausted. I could have chosen not to attend the games, but instead purchased a pink gingham harness and a pink webbed dog leash. YES! A real live 6ft leash that I attached to the back of the harness. I could sit under a shade tree on an old blanket and DD could wander around me 6ft in any direction. It was a really life saver that summer!

 

[Momamy3]

A lot of opinions here...that is for sure!

If there is one thing I have learned as a parent, it is never say never. I will never again say, "My child will never....". Now, I will say, "My child will never....without correction."

Anyway, I used to be one of those who never thought she would use a leash. That is until I was alone on a trip with my two year old dd (who usually was compliant). The stroller was holding the luggage, and I needed both hands to keep the car seat on the stroller (too old for the car seat that fit in the stroller), and I was trying to get her to follow me. She could tell I had no recourse, and she was walking away from me at an airport! It was AWFUL. I don't even know how I eventually managed, but for the next leg of the trip, she had a leash.

You do what you gotta do!

 

[julia & nicks mom]

Princess rn -

I will be at WDW the same week as you and am taking a leash for my extremely active DD who will turn 3 on our trip - I worked in an amusement park as a teenager and I was just like all those who was appalled by leashes...until Julia.

I spend my life saying "until Julia..." and really that is what this boils down to - I always tell people everything you need to know about my Julia you can tell from her hair - she is beautiful and care-free and I wouldn't change her for the world - with her spirit comes challenges I never thought I would have to face - she is way smarter than me or my DH (he skipped two grades in school) apparently she got both of our brain power and I can just see the wheels turning in her little head on how to outsmart us at every corner. She is so full of life and just wants to run first and ask questions later - and so I will have a leash - we go to our local amusement park a lot and she is pretty good but even at 15 months she just started wondering down Main Street oblivious to me or my DH - now she just rips her hand out of mine regardless of how tight my grip is and takes off - with a DS 1 chasing her can be a challenge - so we will have the harness for peace of mind

But just in case you see my spirited curly top running towards you could you grab her and send her back my way - I will be sure to return the favor.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

One look at Julia's picture and we can see that impish look in her eye. Looking at your son's picture and I can see him thinking, "go, Julia, go!".

Yes, I also have my "before Jake, after Jake" days. It's not that he's that gifted (I don't mean that he's not smart, it's just that our challenge isn't there)--it's his stubborn, loud personality. He has a temper and knows how to use it.

Momamy3, you're right, never say never.

Maybe I should have threatened to put a leash on my oldest son. He still doesn't pay attention and stay with us and did get lost one time at WDW. I think it was the visit when he was 7yo and we were in a gift shop. He thought we left (why, I don't know--we hadn't moved towards the door even) so he left. He's now almost 14yo and still doesn't pay attention.

T&B

 

[POOH&PIGLET]

Originally posted by Tigger&Belle
As long as people are discussing things reasonably and respectfully I'm not sure what the issue is.

A few pages back the discussion wasn't so reasonable and respectful. Hopefully the tone of the thread will continue to remain positive.

Originally posted by erinz
Sorry, I just had to add my 2 cents....

First of all, I think we can all agree that a 1 or 2 yr old is not going to walk around on a leash saying to themselves " leashes are really for animals....this is so degrading!". They are just thinking something like, "oh, I guess I can't go as far as I want, I don't like this!".

Causing a child to feel uncomfortable with forced boundaries is not cruel, nor is it treating them like an animal.

The feeling that leashes are just for animals, or are cruel, come from the minds of the adults.

So, the bottom line is, if we had to choose, do we want to avoid the possibility that other adults will perceive us as cruel, or do we want to make sure our children are as safe as possible?

And by the way, are we being cruel when we put our 1yr olds in "cages" at night?

Just something to think about...

I agree with your first statement, but leashes aren’t only being used for 1 or 2 year olds.

The feeling that leashes are just for animals, or are cruel, does not only come from the minds of the adults, it comes from the minds of children as well. I was at Hershey Park during the Labor Day weekend. We saw only one child on a leash/harness. He was yelling, screaming, and behaving very poorly (to put it politely). I would estimate he was 5 years old (possibly 6). After he was hauled away, my 4-yr-old DD looked at me with confusion. She then said Dad did you see that boy, he had a dog leash. She couldn't believe the boy was on a dog leash. I thought of this thread and smiled.

As I stated way back on page 1, "I understand why people use them but for us we never will." If you have an active 2-yr-old that will run away unless tethered, then by all means use a restraint. However, many people use a leash/harness because they are too lazy to teach their child right from wrong or they are too inattentive to pay attention to their child .

A well-behaved child on a leash will probably not garner much attention. A 5-year-old brat on a leash will get lots of attention from all those around. This may be what leads some to make inappropriate comments, they notice the latter but not the former. Based on this anecdotal evidence, many people believe that leashes are used for older children who should know how to behave more appropriately.

I have no problem with anyone using a restraint as a safety device. That is what I believe all of the above DIS posters use them. That is why people put their children in "cages" at night, for the child's safety. I have a big problem with parents who do not take the time and effort to teach their children how to behave. For some parents, a leash is easier then teaching their children to stay nearby and not run away. For some parents, a leash is easier then paying attention to their child. These are the parents that give leashes a bad rap.

“Give a man a fish; you have fed him for today. Teach a man to fish; and you have fed him for a lifetime.”
Keep a child on a leash; you have made him safe for today. Teach a child right from wrong, how to behave, etc.; and you have made him safe for a lifetime.

 

[GEM]

AsI said way back in this thread, we will be using one in December for our then 20 month old. However, we won't be using it for a "safety device".

Like I said before, our little one is extra tiny. I know that I could keep up with him and I could grab him if he started to wander off, etc. I'm really not worried about him getting lost. At his age, if he were out of the stroller, I would never even take my eyes off him for a second.

For us, the harness will be more of a "happy" device than a "safety" device. Paul is just learning to walk and really enjoys being able to do so. I know that by December he will not be nearly as happy to sit in his stroller all the time as he was on our May trip. So, having the harness will allow him to get out and have a little bit of a chance to move around without me having to hold his hand (which, as I explained, is very hard physically for both of us) and without me having to stop every few steps and go get him when he starts to wander off. (Do you know any 20 month olds who would just toddle right alongside their parents at Disney World without getting distracted?) I don't know that he will be any safer, but I know he will be much happier.

I guess I could try to explain to him that he has to stay in the stroller all day because some adults feel that wearing a harness is degrading. He has sort of a limited vocabulary, though, and I'm not sure "degrading" is one of the words he knows. So, I really don't think it would be fair to him.

 

[Gillian]

Originally posted by POOH&PIGLET
A well-behaved child on a leash will probably not garner much attention. A 5-year-old brat on a leash will get lots of attention from all those around. This may be what leads some to make inappropriate comments, they notice the latter but not the former. Based on this anecdotal evidence, many people believe that leashes are used for older children who should know how to behave more appropriately.

I have no problem with anyone using a restraint as a safety device. That is what I believe all of the above DIS posters use them. That is why people put their children in "cages" at night, for the child's safety. I have a big problem with parents who do not take the time and effort to teach their children how to behave. For some parents, a leash is easier then teaching their children to stay nearby and not run away. For some parents, a leash is easier then paying attention to their child. These are the parents that give leashes a bad rap.

The only problem I have with your post it that it assumes that we can tell the reasons a child is misbehaving just by looking at them. And it further assumes that a child who is not acting appropriately has not been taught how to behave by their parents.

I don't believe this is true. And I don't think people use leashes because they are lazy parents. You cannot always tell why a child is acting up, just as you cannot always identify a disability by looking at someone.

My MIL has 5 children. She and her husband were strict with them. All 5 were taught good manners and proper behavior. But each child has a different personality and had different behavioral issues. She knew which one required an iron grip on the wrist, even though people stared. I bet she would have used a harness if they were available back then!

 

[erinz]

POOH&PIGLET:

You made a good point. I didn't think about older children feeling concerned about younger kids on leashes.....I guess we just need to be sensitive to this and explain the purpose of it (like I'm sure you did) so they would understand.

One great thing about this thread....... even though there is alot of disagreement, it sure is clear that what ever the opinion is, there are alot of parents out there who deeply care about what's best for their children!!