Toddler harness?

[jk and ek]

i haven't been defensive because i've done nothing that needs to be defended...but nice try.

i've got no problem with debate, it just seems that several people are getting too heated for it to be constructive. but if that's what you wanna do... carry on, then!

ETA: i also never once made the dog comparison. i don't speak for others and they don't speak for me. i even plainly said that i understand the appeal of leashes and then explained why they still aren't for us.

 

[minniemous]

I'm sorry, but wouldn't your anger be better directed at something more productive? This person is genuinely trying to keep their child safe in the way THEY deem best for THEIR child and you are equating her efforts to emotional and physical abuse? Obviously you have your opinions but I would challenge you to produce actual peer reviewed, scientific evidence of these harnesses doing harm to anyone's child.

I'm sure there are things you do as a parent that others would deem harmful. Yelling, spanking, circumcision, time outs, you name it and someone has an opinion on what you're doing "wrong". Let's cut each other some slack and just agree that what works for some doesn't work for others and leave it at that.

 

[Susiequsie60]

Wow. Such strong strong strong feelings both ways. I honestly don't get it.

Here's my take: I never used one. I'm just not crazy about them, and I don't think they were necessary nor right for my kids.

However, maybe a harness would work great for you. Give it a try.

If it works for you and your child, put it on, feel secure, and don't give a hoot what anyone else thinks!

I understand that you wanted opinions from others, but I'm assuming it was from people who had actually used a harness and had something constructive to tell you. Do you really care if someone who has never used one wants to tell you that they're not a good choice?

Put one on your kid around the neighborhood or in the super market and see how it goes. Then make your decision.

Just my opinion . . .

 

[Nancyg56]

Again, keep making this kid - dog comparison. You're really making my point for me!

"I mean, hey, why not put a leash on my kid? I put a leash on my dog!"

When My daughter was 2 my sister and I were at Mystic Aquarium with mythree children. My sister had Marisa by the hand when the doors to the show opened and a sea of people swept out and literally pulled my tiny daughter out of he aunts gasp. I cannot describe the fear the two of us had, and thesight of my mittle girl, hysterical because she was so scared is still tttooed in my memory. We were not lazy women, and we certainly were accustomed to having littles in our cae, but we never could have predicted this.

You get to decide what is appropriate for you family, but you do nt get to determine other's comfot level. I am almost 60, and my daughte is now almost 40, but I still remember this one moment in time so when my lovely little 2 YO granddaughter came with us to the Big E, my DD had an Elmo harness for her. You see there are swarms of people there as well, and that little Peanut was way too precious for us to worry about small minded judgemental people.

 

[galaxygirl76]

Our daughter(she was 2 when we went to wdw) is a runner so we decided to get a kitty backpack for her. She loved it, would put it on herself and everything. The one time we didn't put it on her she took off like a bat out of hell.

 

[kellyjeanie]

It was a nice discussion until some of the anti-"leash" people started to get nasty and, now, condescending. I appreciate the "live and let live" style of parenting; honestly I could care less whether or not you use a harness - do what works for you. That doesn't get me up in arms. What grinds my gears is the "parent the way I do or you're doing it wrong" style. The people who cannot seem to accept that some parents make different decisions than they do.

 

[Susiequsie60]

It was a nice discussion until some of the anti-"leash" people started to get nasty and, now, condescending. I appreciate the "live and let live" style of parenting; honestly I could care less whether or not you use a harness - do what works for you. That doesn't get me up in arms. What grinds my gears is the "parent the way I do or you're doing it wrong" style. The people who cannot seem to accept that some parents make different decisions than they do.

True that! Parenting is definitely the hardest thing I personally have ever done. I've run into situations that I would have bet the farm would never happen to me! I think all the parents out there should cut some slack to all of the other parents. If it doesn't affect you directly, who cares?

 

[Magic Band Defender]

I do not own nor have ever used a child harness for my 2.5 year old little sprinter. Luckily for us he likes his stroller.

I do not see how, when used properly, a child harness is abusive or neglectful. I admit I think they look goofy, but child safety is more important than a strangers opinion.

As a parent I would rather use a child harness if necessary than risk my child getting lost somewhere as large and busy as WDW.

TLDR: Do whatever you need to keep your kids safe. You'll get no judgey looks from me.

 

[beck00]

We brought one for our then 17-month-old, VERY mobile DD, but used it all of about 5 seconds. She wasn't a fan, and preferred to kick back in the stroller and view the sights. No way we'll be so lucky again this November when she'll be 1 month shy of 3.

 

[cakebaker]

If you've got a wanderer, hold their hand. If they don't want to hold your hand, they go back in the stroller. they can whine and fuss as much as they want - that's the rules. Sooner or later, they'll figure out that it's better to hold a hand than be cooped up in the stroller.

.

Those are your rules and you're free to have them and apply them to your children.

I used a harness on each of my twin girls when we went in the 80's and my now 3 yr old grandson wore one last trip and will wear it again on our trip this summer.

We like giving him the freedom to move on his own at his own pace and enjoy the parks on foot just like we do as much as possible. The harness allows him to have both hands free to touch and explore. It has nothing to do with the worry that he'll run off or mis-behave. It has everything to do with allowing him more mobility and being part of the family experience rather than being tucked away in a stroller where he can't be heard and all we see is the back of his head.

And those are MY rules- you don't have to like mine and I don't have to like yours. To each their own.

 

[North of Mouse]

I did not ever use a leash (harness), whatever they are all called now, but if that's a way to keep a child close to you, only you know your child and how they listen.

My fear would be if the leash was too long, it could be a danger to others tripping between you and your child if they do not see it. It's not exactly something you would be looking for. I would go for a very short reach, and not something that your child could tug very far for their safety and others.

 

[MsMagical]

No judgment from this non-harness use either. I have never used one and never will but it doesn't matter to me if someone else does.

I have actually considered using one at Disney World and decided against it. One of my concerns was that my child might decide last minute to walk into the path of an on coming person or stroller or wheelchair and end up getting hurt or tripping and hurting someone else. Though I would have a hold of the harness' leash, I wouldn't be able to scoop them out of the way like I could if we were holding hands. With my daughter, that was a real concern because she is a bit of a dreamer and sort of flits here and there distracted by shiny things and whatever thoughts run through her head. My son wouldn't need a harness because he's sharp and alert to his environment and hangs near me always. Anyway, that is something to consider. I haven't used one so I'm not sure how likely this scenario might be in real life but it was a factor in our decision.

 

[Nata]

You see, there are already 3 of us on this thread who consider harnesses to be less safe in a crowded situation. I would be so worried about someone tripping on the leash. I can see how easy it is not to notice it. We all had been bumped into by people, strollers, ECVs, imagine the same thing happening to a leash with your toddler attached to it.

 

[kangamangus]

Do whatever works for your family, we wouldn't use them, because I dont want my little ones thinking that it's okay to walk freely several feet ahead of me. We walk together or you go back in the stroller. That's how we roll, you do what's right for your family.

 

[mirak]

for all the parents that are pro-leash; if you are secure in your decision to use them, maybe try not be so defensive about it. if you think they are the right choice for you, just own it. when you argue about it, you sound like you're self conscious and trying to convince yourself that you're doing the right thing because you certainly aren't going to convince the anti-leash crowd.

i mean, i guess this can apply to a lot of parenting decisions people argue about. i get that it's hard to not take things personally when people don't agree with the things you do with your children, but if you're doing the right thing you should feel good enough about it to not feel the need to get up in arms about it when somebody disagrees.

Yes, the "I like to walk my children around on leashes like dogs because it makes my job easier" crowd really got defensive about it!

 

[Newsies]

Pro-leash: We used them, they worked for us but we understand they're not for everyone! Your miles may vary, whatever works to keep your kids safe.

Anti-leash: YOUR KIDS ARE NOT DOGS WHY ARE YOU TREATING YOUR KIDS LIKE DOGS LEARN SOME PARENTING YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS

Pro-leash: Hey, they're not that bad!

Anti-leash: Why are you so defensive?

That's essentially what I've been reading, too.

 

[isabellea]

Have you considered a kid handle attached to your stroller? We have one attached to our stroller and my toddler knows that she has three choices: hold mommy or daddy's hand, hold the handle (more comfortable than adult hand because it's at their height) or you stay in the stroller. You run, you go back to the stroller for the rest of the day. Last August we visited MK and she loved holding Mickey's handle (my plain handle had a Mickey sticker on it). She felt grown up and she was always next to me.

http://www.amazon.ca/Skip-Hop-Walk-Along-Stroller-Handle/dp/B00I3ZRPPW

 

[IrishNYC]

Two problems with that comparison. (1) Dogs don't walk on 2 legs. (2) They're dogs - not children.

If you've got a wanderer, hold their hand. If they don't want to hold your hand, they go back in the stroller. they can whine and fuss as much as they want - that's the rules. Sooner or later, they'll figure out that it's better to hold a hand than be cooped up in the stroller.

Modern Family nailed it. Putting a kid on a leash not only looks absolutely ridiculous, it's a PITA for everyone else in the crowd trying not to get tangled up in your bad parenting.

You know what's ridiculous? Judging someone else's parenting.

 

[Jing]

The first harness I saw was when I was a kid and a peer was wearing one. I thought to myself "how embarrassing - I hope mom doesn't get any ideas." I was around 5.

Well we are in the same boat as OP in that our Mr. Littles will be 22 months in October. In yet another karmic "I'll never do that" parenthood moment, I found myself looking at the harness backpacks in target. He isn't even walking yet, and our plan is to use our boba and maybe the stroller, but at this point I am not interested in shutting down viable possibilities just because another mommy waves the "I'm better than you" stick at me.

 

[mirak]

You know what's ridiculous? Judging someone else's parenting.

That's not ridiculous at all. Our society judges bad parents all the time. We take kids away. We put bad parents in jail. Now of course putting your kid on a leash doesn't rise to that level - it's just silly and degrading to leash your kiddo like a dog - but we absolutely can and should judge bad parenting.