Fishbone†
<font color=blue>Does strange things while sleepin
- Joined
- May 31, 2001
Just as a precursor...for those of you that don't know, Tamie and I work together (and no, we are not married for those of you who may have been confused - luvstiggertoo!! 
). Tamie is our graphic designer, I'm the assistant to the VP of Marketing, so as Tamie is planning this trip for the past nine months somewhat inconveniently one week before our summer convention, I will be her backup in the unfortunate case of an emergency (to be defined as "couldn't be anticipated, and can't be ignored"). I LOVE, LIVE and BREATH Excel, I'm proficient in Word, I put out a mean presentation in Powerpoint, and I write reports in our mainframe, but I know ABSOLUTELY nothing about Quark and Photoshop. ZILCH!! But hey, how hard can it be??? 
I'll get back to you on that.
So, we squeeze in a crash course - it seems relatively simple. I know everyone knows that I'm not the designer - just a "in a pinch" last resort kind of thing......
So this morning our Ad Manager is in full panic - arms flailing, cheeks flushed, papers flying, incomplete sentences, darting from place to place, pacing the floor and slamming cups of coffee. "Can't stop, can't talk, gotta move, gotta go, it's the eleventh hour, we're behind the eight ball, I got like (he looks at his watch for like the tenth time in the last twenty words) no time, Tamie, leaving, going, two weeks, gone, 1:00. Oh my!" Yeah, because he only found out like an hour ago that this was happening. Forget that Tamie has been planning this trip for nine months..... disregard the daily walks down the hall for the past month to remind everyone that July 26th was her last day..... nevermind the brightly colored paper link chain that she strung throughout her cube for the last 99 days making a big show of removing one at the end of each day!! It's quite obvious how this might have snuck up on him!!
So Tamie finally just plain runs away at 2:00 with some last minute instructions (just in case). You could just see the last of the dust particles she had stirred up on her way out settling when all heck broke loose. Not one, not two, not even three or four emergencies pop up..... but five, count them, FIVE project fell across my desk within 20 minutes..... and oh no, not those can you do this sometime next week projects, no, these were those "can you do this (no breath), why isn't it done yet?" projects! Simple changes, right? A pricepoint here, an account name there, YEAH RIGHT!!! No, I believe it was, "can you take just this section out of this picture and place it over here, overlay some different titles, maybe design a little themed backdrop"....... HELLO!!!! Did I happen to mention that I am a math minor, a logical thinker, interested in numbers.......you know numbers, those things that remain constant, never changing, always predictable, no creativity required?!?!?!
Only a little less then two hours after Tamie had left, it's now me that is in full panic mode, cheeks flushed, papers flying...... slamming Dr. Peppers! Want to know why???? 1) Only 2% of Tamie's vacation has expired, 2) I am in the last week crunch / cram session of planning a week long Summer Sales Convention (to include our VPs, Managers, Account Execs, Sales Reps, and Vendors), and 3) I have forgotten ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY EVERYTHING that Tamie taught me just yesterday..... don't know what happened...... I'm an intelligent person..... maybe it just fell out of my head..... I looked under the desk..... didn't see it there...... not sure where it went, but when they come with the straight jacket next week to take me away (HA HA HEE HEE HO HO), they just may find me still looking for it.
Can someone pass the sedatives?????
). Tamie is our graphic designer, I'm the assistant to the VP of Marketing, so as Tamie is planning this trip for the past nine months somewhat inconveniently one week before our summer convention, I will be her backup in the unfortunate case of an emergency (to be defined as "couldn't be anticipated, and can't be ignored"). I LOVE, LIVE and BREATH Excel, I'm proficient in Word, I put out a mean presentation in Powerpoint, and I write reports in our mainframe, but I know ABSOLUTELY nothing about Quark and Photoshop. ZILCH!! But hey, how hard can it be??? I'll get back to you on that. So, we squeeze in a crash course - it seems relatively simple. I know everyone knows that I'm not the designer - just a "in a pinch" last resort kind of thing......
So this morning our Ad Manager is in full panic - arms flailing, cheeks flushed, papers flying, incomplete sentences, darting from place to place, pacing the floor and slamming cups of coffee. "Can't stop, can't talk, gotta move, gotta go, it's the eleventh hour, we're behind the eight ball, I got like (he looks at his watch for like the tenth time in the last twenty words) no time, Tamie, leaving, going, two weeks, gone, 1:00. Oh my!" Yeah, because he only found out like an hour ago that this was happening.
Forget that Tamie has been planning this trip for nine months..... disregard the daily walks down the hall for the past month to remind everyone that July 26th was her last day..... nevermind the brightly colored paper link chain that she strung throughout her cube for the last 99 days making a big show of removing one at the end of each day!! It's quite obvious how this might have snuck up on him!! So Tamie finally just plain runs away at 2:00 with some last minute instructions (just in case). You could just see the last of the dust particles she had stirred up on her way out settling when all heck broke loose. Not one, not two, not even three or four emergencies pop up..... but five, count them, FIVE project fell across my desk within 20 minutes..... and oh no, not those can you do this sometime next week projects, no, these were those "can you do this (no breath), why isn't it done yet?" projects! Simple changes, right? A pricepoint here, an account name there, YEAH RIGHT!!!
No, I believe it was, "can you take just this section out of this picture and place it over here, overlay some different titles, maybe design a little themed backdrop"....... HELLO!!!! Did I happen to mention that I am a math minor, a logical thinker, interested in numbers.......you know numbers, those things that remain constant, never changing, always predictable, no creativity required?!?!?!Only a little less then two hours after Tamie had left, it's now me that is in full panic mode, cheeks flushed, papers flying...... slamming Dr. Peppers! Want to know why???? 1) Only 2% of Tamie's vacation has expired, 2) I am in the last week crunch / cram session of planning a week long Summer Sales Convention (to include our VPs, Managers, Account Execs, Sales Reps, and Vendors), and 3) I have forgotten ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY EVERYTHING that Tamie taught me just yesterday..... don't know what happened...... I'm an intelligent person..... maybe it just fell out of my head..... I looked under the desk..... didn't see it there...... not sure where it went, but when they come with the straight jacket next week to take me away (HA HA HEE HEE HO HO), they just may find me still looking for it.
Can someone pass the sedatives?????
