Tipping Vent...

[heiressly]

When we got to the DCL port on our last cruise, a very eager porter helped us unload our bags from the rental car. When he was finished, he said to my DH, "You won't see me inside, so if you want to take care of me, now is the time." His rudeness made me not want to take care of him.

To me, gratuities are a token of gratitude. Don't ask me for a tip, and don't expect a buck from me just because you have a jar on the counter. Why do all these people suddenly feel they're due a tip for doing their jobs? It's ridiculous. I almost expect to see a tip jar next to the tongue depressers and cotton balls at my next doctor's appointment.

ooh this post just made me think of a similar situation we had on our last cruise.

we pull into port canaveral and before the car even comes to a complete stop, a porter opens the trunk/hatch (suv) and starts pulling out everything that was back there, including an umbrella and a large tivo box (why we'd be taking an open tivo box on a cruise is beyond me ), and loading on to a cart. i also need to mention that every time he took a peice of luggage out, he didn't lift it but instead let it roll and bang right over the bumper of the car. every. single. time., which was lovely. ok i'm trying to not start off the vacation annoyed, so i quickly get out and nicely ask him to hold on, that we're only taking the 3 peices of luggage, none of the other things he took out.

so he gives me an annoyed face, probably because theres other cars pulling up that he could be gracing with his presence, and tosses the other items back into the trunk. so i, still nicely, tell him thanks and to hold on one sec. i get back in the car to grab his tip and i swear as i turned to get back out of the car he was rightthere, in between the slightly opened door and me. now first i should say that during this time, everyone else had already went inside the terminal, so i was alone there and second i told him i would be right back, (and since i went into the passenger side, it wasn't like i was going to drive off without tipping him).

so i was pretty taken aback by that to begin with when he then starts with this creepy monotone of, "ok all done, i've loaded all your luggage for you and will make sure it gets to your room right away, i'm going to take care of everything, on behalf of disney cruise line (he was wearing a dcl hat, even though the porters aren't employed by disney) i'll make sure everything goes smoothly" and he said this like 3 times and actually puts his arms on the door and hood of the car so hes like completely blocking me, so now i'm even more uncomfortable and instead of giving him the singles I had taken out in preparation for this, I take out a 10 figuring it'll keep him happy and keep my luggage out of the atlantic.

he THEN says, "c'mon make it 20, driving a car like this and going on a disney cruise you can afford it" so i grabbed two 10s and gave it to him, and he backs up and goes "thanks a lot have a good cruise"

just thinking back on it makes me sick but i truly felt that if i didn't tip him 20 dollars, or if i tried to get the attention of another porter or someone, that something would happen to my luggage. it was just such a horrible experience and something we've never gone through on over 10 dcl cruises. i mean i have no problem tipping, and we usually tip well (we always tip least 20% when we eat out, and more if the service is good etc.) but i just felt this was like extortion and it left a really bad taste in my mouth. next time i'll have the doors locked before we pull up to the terminal.

ok thread hijack over haha

 

[tinkerone]

My DD13 is a paper carrier, a darn good one, too. She has been for about 5 years now. She has a lot of help from Mom & Grandma, but she puts the papers in the mailbox, on the porch, between the doors, where ever the customer wants it. She does it right after school and earlier if there isn't school. She leaves candy canes on the papers the day before Christmas, not her name & address. They get that when they first start, so they can contact her directly if there's a problem. Yes, she gets tips, but not because she asks or expects them, because she takes care of her customers. She gets paid $0.07 per paper. She even delivered papers on Thanksgiving.

when we had a young carrier that walked door to door i made sure i gave tips on a weekly basis. now a days you seldom find young carriers. its someone driving a car and just tossing the paper and where it lands, it lands.
hope your dd cleans up, not just at christmas but all year round. that is a tough job and i want her to know how greatful everyone is for her service . just wish we had a young carrier again.

 

[torinsmom]

I won't tip the mailman--the USPS pays well from what I hear and my mail gets mixed up all the time anyway.

I will tip the garbagemen this year, because they do a great job. Once in awhile I forget to put the can out and I called and they came out another day to get it. I am not in city limits, so I pay for trash service, but still they do a great job!

If I got a paper, I would tip the carrier. I delivered papers for several years to be able to afford to be home with my son. It is hard work, middle of the night, and after gas and wear and tear on the car, it pays very little. I think I got paid around 10 cents a paper, IF the subscribers paid. If they didn't, I either had to go to their door and try to collect or just eat the cost. You have to pick up the paper, put in the inserts, bag them and then deliver them. And believe me, if everyone got their paper on the doorstep exactly in front of their door, it would have taken me until the next night to be done. We're talking 200-300 papers for most carriers to deliver. Get them at 2-3am and they are supposed to be all delivered by 6am. I always aimed for the front door, but unless I saw that it went in a ditch, I didn't go and retrieve the paper if I missed. That would be time consuming and actually dangerous.

When I delivered papers, I always put a Christmas card in around Thanksgiving with my address on it. I think maybe 30% of my customers tipped me, anywhere from $5-$20, and I really did appreciate it.

What it comes down to is tip if you feel someone deserves it and don't tip if you don't It's not like anyone is keeping score.

Marsha

 

[dis ms.]

so i was pretty taken aback by that to begin with when he then starts with this creepy monotone of, "ok all done, i've loaded all your luggage for you and will make sure it gets to your room right away, i'm going to take care of everything, on behalf of disney cruise line (he was wearing a dcl hat, even though the porters aren't employed by disney) i'll make sure everything goes smoothly" and he said this like 3 times and actually puts his arms on the door and hood of the car so hes like completely blocking me, so now i'm even more uncomfortable and instead of giving him the singles I had taken out in preparation for this, I take out a 10 figuring it'll keep him happy and keep my luggage out of the atlantic.

he THEN says, "c'mon make it 20, driving a car like this and going on a disney cruise you can afford it" so i grabbed two 10s and gave it to him, and he backs up and goes "thanks a lot have a good cruise"

WTH?!!

As a previous poster said, it's customary to tip porters, so they've come to expect it. But expecting it and demanding it are two different things.

 

[Lisa_M]

You're gonna be hard pressed to find many 12 year olds that deliever the paper to their neighborhood these days....this isn't the 1980's much less the 1950's. Most "paperboys" are adults that deliver to hundreds of houses by car each day. Not some kid walking up and down their street.

I can also tell you that back in the mid-80's I was a "paperboy" and I delievered to about 50 houses in my neighborhood and made more then $40's a week. I think it was about $1 / house and that was 20 years ago.

My parents have a paperboy, he's about 13, but he doesn't collect. They pay the paper directly and add a tip in for him. In smaller markets, kids are still delivering papers. Walking door to door to deliver a paper is more deserving of a tip than heaving it out a car window into wet grass or snow. That isn't good customer service, IMO.

 

[momof296&02]

The postman is NOT allowed to take monetary gifts(tips). You may give them a gift just not cash

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

Tipping may be ridiculous... until you walk a mile in their shoes

As I stated, I have worked weekends, holidays and many a night shift. I don't deliever papers and mail from my car either.

I used to wipe people's butts, change adult diapers, clean up puke and deal with unruly family and patients. So I have walked more than a mile in their shoes. I have never recieved a tip nor does the majority of health employees who do the same job as I or worse. Nor do I expect it. We are paid to do a job, we chose our profession, end of story.

So forgive me if I don't tip someone, who rides by and throws my paper in my driveway or leans out the window and sticks my mail in the box. Thats their job, plain and simple.

I tip if service is above and beyond, not for doing the job you were hired to do.

Why do alot of the people on these boards think you're a terrible person if you don't tip everyone with their hand out? I have never even heard of tipping half the people that some here on the Dis do, until I starting coming here.

Gees, I don't care what you do with your money, why Is it such a problem to some people what I "don't" do with mine?

 

[problemchild718]

"Hey, why dont you tape a bedpan to your hip with a sigh that reads"tips" sorry.. "

OMG too funny!!!

 

[veraletta]

My son was a paper carrier for one year, believe me the pay is low, they work every day and they pay for their own gas, plastic bags, rubber bands and insurance because some one may says he broke some thing.
The only reason he worked as a paper boy was because he was looking for work and it was the only place that hired him right away, and this was better than drawing unemployment.
He worked all year thru the holiday and never expected that he would get a tip from any one, but he did and this was very much welcome and appreciated.

You seldom just throw a paper from a car, and hit a pouch.
Your Motor route is a walking motor route, or at least in our area, You are not aloud to throw papers in the yard.

He worked hard; he would have to put paper on a chair on the pouch, as most of the old people would have a hard time bending down to pick it up, so I would say about 10% of his route wanted it on a chair on the pouch, and some even wanted it put in the screen door its were ever the customer wants it.
It would have been easy as pie to just throw it out the car window and just let it land where ever but you wouldn’t make any money, as you would be reported for not delivering their paper.

We would walk up to each pouch or at least close enough to throw the paper on the pouch in front of the door, most people will get mad if they have to hunt down a paper on their pouch, they will call and say that they didn’t get their paper.
All this work in the rain or snow many times I fell down in a hole or over some thing in some ones yard in the dark.

He worked from 2am-6am which is only 4 hours; if the paper was late he didn’t get paid for late papers, wet papers, papers that they say didn’t get put in front of the door.
Then you have the people on Sunday who say I didn’t get the Sunday paper, because they want another set of coupons, which is taken of his pay for a non delivered news paper.
Many times I would go out and help him as he would be sick or the company was late on getting the papers printed out on time, for him to get his papers deliver on time.

Thank god he only had to do this for one year until he got a job at amazon.com.
The only time I enjoyed helping him was in the summer time.

So yeah I tip the paper boy, mail carrier and any one else I feel is under paid or works hard to make my life easier.
My mail carrier will get out of her car and bring me boxes that will not fit in my mail box, so why wouldn’t I show her that I really appreciate that she just doesn’t take it back to the post office for me to pick up.

I feel that they deserve it.
Walk a mile in their shoes then decide if they deserve it.

 

[tinkerbellmagic]

Well, I hesitate to venture into this thread, but here goes: The difference between letter carriers and perhaps other individuals that may be tipped, is that LETTER CARRIERS NEVER ASK FOR TIPS. Letter carriers do not wear a cup around their neck, nor do they leave notes in people's mail boxes asking for tips. If you choose to tip your letter carrier, I am sure he/she will very much appreciate it. If you choose not to, that is fine too.

My husband has been delivering mail for over 30 years. The people on my husband's route love him. He takes care of their letters and packages and sometimes takes care of them too (oops, that came out weirder than intended ).

My husband certainly does not expect tips. Some of the people on his route choose to give him tips and gifts at Christmas. They seem to have a "let them try and stop me" attitude when it comes to the no tipping policy.

Now I realize not everyone has a great mail carrier. My husband works with people that do not have that sense of pride in their routes and he feels sorry for their patrons, so I can understand why some of you do not have the best of feelings concerning your letter carrier.

By the way, I also agree tipping has gotten out of hand to a certain degree. But the thing about tipping is, it is your choice. No one can force you to do so. If you feel it is warranted, so be it. If it makes me feel good to discreetly tip a young person from Best Buy who puts a heavy treadmill in my car, great. If they say they don't accept tips, I just say, "I won't tell" and usually that puts a smile on their face and on mine too.

Here are a couple letter carrier/gift giving threads from last year (there are usually a couple of these a year) if anyone is interested:
http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1300033
http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1262778

tink

 

[tinkerbellmagic]

The postman is NOT allowed to take monetary gifts(tips). You may give them a gift just not cash

Hi, here is the official word as posted by another DISer last year:

My dad was a letter carrier for 30 yrs and he received all sorts of gifts. He really appreciated all of them and would (usually)share with us.

Here's what the post office says the rules are:


"Can USPS® employees receive gifts?

Gifts to Postal Service Employees
While many Postal Service™ customers have traditionally thanked their letter carrier with gifts of cash during the holiday season, this practice puts our employees at risk of violating federal law. The Standards of Ethical Conduct for Employees of the Executive Branch ("Standards"), specifies that Postal Service employees may not accept gifts from outside sources (including Postal Service customers) or gifts given to them because of their official positions. Postal Service employees are also prohibited from soliciting gifts from outside sources.

There are a number of exceptions and exclusions to the general gifts rule. Postal Service employees may accept the following items:

Snacks and beverages that are not offered as part of a meal.
Items with little intrinsic value (i.e., greeting cards, plaques, pens, coffee mugs, etc.).
Perishable items (i.e., flowers, chocolates, cookies, etc.); if the items are clearly worth more than $20, employees should share them with others in the Postal Service workplace.
Items with a market (retail) value of $20 or less.
Gifts motivated solely because of a personal relationship.
Gifts for which the employee has paid market (retail) value.
Gifts paid for by the Postal Service.
Postal Service employees may not accept cash - in any amount or form (bills, checks, money orders) - from an outside source"


Hope this helps...

 

[tinkerbellmagic]

My son was a paper carrier for one year, believe me the pay is low, they work every day and they pay for their own gas, plastic bags, rubber bands and insurance because some one may says he broke some thing.

My sons, too, worked as paper carriers. I do appreciate you letting people know it is not as simple as they make it sound. Thanks for sharing.

So yeah I tip the paper boy, mail carrier and any one else I feel is under paid or works hard to make my life easier.
My mail carrier will get out of her car and bring me boxes that will not fit in my mail box, so why wouldn’t I show her that I really appreciate that she just doesn’t take it back to the post office for me to pick up.

I feel that they deserve it.
Walk a mile in their shoes then decide if they deserve it.

I agree and love the quote walk a mile in their shoes then decide if they deserve it.

My letter carrier husband really does go above and beyond the call of duty. Delivering mail is not just a job to him, it defines who he is and he loves his patrons as much as they love him. He is sometimes the only individual an elderly person sees all day and they look forward to his visits. He has found his patrons' lost dogs who have escaped through the gate and has returned them to their correct backyards. He has rescued injured animals and taken them to the animal shelter on his route (yes, he broke the rules and put an injured dog inside the mail van). He also has gotten bitten by dogs approximately fourteen times, one of the injuries leaving a trail of blood down the stairs so alarming that when the father of the household came home, he thought someone in his family had a terrible accident.

These incidents merely scratch the surface, but yeah, in rain, snow, sleet, and hail, he is always there, on foot, sometimes wearing chains on his boots for traction, trying to get up someone's snowy front stairs who hasn't shoveled in a month, sometimes with icicles hanging from his eyebrows and not one complaint.

tink

 

[JoiseyMom]

My sons, too, worked as paper carriers. I do appreciate you letting people know it is not as simple as they make it sound. Thanks for sharing.



I agree and love the quote walk a mile in their shoes then decide if they deserve it.

My letter carrier husband really does go above and beyond the call of duty. Delivering mail is not just a job to him, it defines who he is and he loves his patrons as much as they love him. He is sometimes the only individual an elderly person sees all day and they look forward to his visits. He has found his patrons' lost dogs who have escaped through the gate and has returned them to their correct backyards. He has rescued injured animals and taken them to the animal shelter on his route (yes, he broke the rules and put an injured dog inside the mail van). He also has gotten bitten by dogs approximately fourteen times, one of the injuries leaving a trail of blood down the stairs so alarming that when the father of the household came home, he thought someone in his family had a terrible accident.

These incidents merely scratch the surface, but yeah, in rain, snow, sleet, and hail, he is always there, on foot, sometimes wearing chains on his boots for traction, trying to get up someone's snowy front stairs who hasn't shoveled in a month, sometimes with icicles hanging from his eyebrows and not one complaint.

tink

If I had a letter carrier like your husband I would more than likely tip him. At least 3 days a week, I get mail that isn't mine. I did yesterday too. It is for my neighbor. My carrier never comes to my door. He will SHOVE it in the box. My DS got his College Diploma in the mail (CC college), and it said DO NOT BEND. Guess what..it was put in MY MAILBOX.

Now the letter carrier we had when we first moved here was GREAT! If there was a package, he came to the door, and brought all the mail, not just the package. I was very sad when he took another route.

I started this thread with the vent of the sense of entitlement of some that expect tips.

 

[EnchantedPrincess]

For those of you who tips the garbage collectors, do you just wait till they come around and run out to give them the tip? Also, there are usually the driver and at least couple other people..so do you tip each one of them? Not that I really would tip our garbage collector this year..our lids are always across the street, or in our neighbor's yard....they are so rough on our garbage can..always breaking them. My dh said that maybe we should tip them this christmas and they will be nicer to us next year....i was thinking about baking cookies...but I never know when they would come around and leaving a batch of cookies on the garbage can for them just doesn't seem right!

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

Well I tip everyone, but our paper man gets out of the car and tosses the paper right at the front door. Never have to search for it. He is an illegal immigrant and is currently teaching my 68 year old father Spanish. Sometimes his little kids are with him and they get candy from my dad. (My dad is outside reading every day at 4:00am).

Where I live, mailboxes are located ON the house by the front door ... so the mailman walks the route everyday and walks up the stairs to get to my mailbox. No lazy mailman here! He is offered water when it is hot, cocoa when it is cold. It is just human kindness.

Garbage men here are the best - they will take ANYTHING - they go right down the alleys AND if anything spills they pick it up. They love beer and usually cases of miller lite are given to them.

At the holidays mail carriers, garbage men, and paper men are all tipped! I would never want any of their jobs.

It is so interesting - I never knew that there were people who did NOT tip until I got on these boards.

I tip housekeepers at hotels and have for more than 30 years, valet (both coming and going), cat sitters, hairdressers. Always tip the host at restaurants too. I have several favorites that my husband and I frequent and NEVER wait for a table. Heck I even give cash to the scheduler at my doctor's office (she always squeezes me in).

 

[jenm2878]

I agree that tipping is out of control. I was in a Subway yesterday and there was a tip jar by the cash register. How is making my sandwich doing a service above and beyond?

We didn't tip our paper carriers as they would wake us up EVERY morning. We live on the corner and they would park their car by our house and procede to argue and scream obscenities EVERY morning while sorting through the papers for the street. After I complained twice, the one woman stood on my front porch, which is right under our bedroom window and screamed at the top of her lungs "I HATE THIS F'ING JOB." It was during the summer (open windows) so that was a lovely thing to wake up to. Needless to say, the paper was cancelled the next day.

We have a mail slot, but my postal carrier will never push the mail through - it always hangs out. (there's PLENTY of room to push it through) We've gotten soggy or opened mail more times then I can count. No tip for him either.

Now our veterinarian on the other hand, gives 110% every time we see him. He's taken our pets home with him after surgery so they could be watched more closely, will come in day or night for our family for an emergency, and will call us from his home to get updates on our pets. Every Christmas he gets either a gift certificate from us or a large plate of bakery, which he thanks us profusely for.

I have no problem tipping excellent service, but I hate feeling bullied into it or like I need to do it to 'buy' a service. (like the poster who mentioned that if they didn't tip the porter what he asked, something would have happened to their luggage)

 

[jenm2878]

Oops! Double post.

 

[tinkerbellmagic]

..i was thinking about baking cookies...but I never know when they would come around and leaving a batch of cookies on the garbage can for them just doesn't seem right!

Hi, Just some advice about giving baked goods for the holidays - baked goods given as gifts to people in the service industry are usually disposed of for the same reason they are not accepted at many bake sales. Unless my husband (letter carrier) personally knows the person who baked the treat, unfortunately, it is tossed out.

Below is from one of last year's gift giving thread:

As another wife of a mail carrier - I agree with everything you've said. One note, is that he never brings home any of the homemade food items because we don't know the giver personally and can't vouch for their cleanliness, etc.... He also gives everyone a thank-you note who gives him a gift unless he's able to thank them face-to-face. And as was already stated - he never forgets who gives him a gift either. DH works hard to keep his customers happy and takes alot of pride in his work.

tink

 

[tinkerbellmagic]

I won't tip the mailman--the USPS pays well from what I hear and my mail gets mixed up all the time anyway.

USPS paid well in the 1970s and 1980s. Because of that, most people are under the delusion that they still do.

I do not blame anyone for not tipping a letter carrier that simply does not care about his/her route. I know many times people can't help but focus on the mistakes letter carrier's make and rightly so, mail is very important. The trouble is, people have no idea how many times misaddressed letters make it into their mail box because your letter carrier/post office did care. I am not talking about junk mail, I am talking about old Aunt Hattie that can't quite get your address right (or even close). She sends a birthday card with $20 in cash with a barely legible and incorrect address, and some how, miraculously, it ends up in your mail box.

 

[TAEMom]

I

How does everyone feel about giving their hairdresser and extra tip
at Christmas? I really need to have my hair colored and cut for the holidays but I don't feel I should have to tip extra because it is the holiday season.
I have been going to the same person for about a year.

Kim

I'm curious about this as well. In the past, at holiday time, I have just given my hairdresser twice what I would normally tip for a haircut/style. This year, I will be getting my hair highlighted too, so she will receive a big tip for that appt. anyway. Do I have to double that?? I have also noticed that she occasionally has gifts at her work area during the Christmas season. What do you give your stylist for a holiday gift?? She has been my stylist for about 3 yrs and does a great job, so I surely don't want to offend her!