Chapter 8: To Infinity And Beyond, As Long As You Have A FastPass
After all of that nagging I’ve been doing over arriving at the parks for Rope Drop…
We missed Rope Drop.
Now, in my defense, it was at 7:00 a.m. More specifically, the new Toy Story Land in Hollywood Studios was opening at 7:00 a.m. It had been open for a grand total of three weeks at that point, so the extended hours were in anticipation of massive crowds for the new attractions.
Naturally, we had wanted to take advantage of the early hours. But with three days of hardcore theme park touring behind us, the spirits were willing, but the bodies were weak. I am ashamed to report that we didn’t make it to Hollywood Studios until about 7:45 a.m. I know…slackers. On the plus side, my parents managed to join us for the morning.
I am not ashamed in the least to say that the park looks 1,000 times better like this, without the giant stupid sorcerer hat in the way.
As usual, we decided to start our day by annoying Drew and taking a family photo instead of getting on a ride.
The crowds didn’t seem too bad that early, even though we knew everyone and their long-lost distant relatives would be heading to Toy Story Land.
Once there, we saw a photographer with no line at the entrance, so we stopped for another quick shot.
We figured that everyone going to Toy Story Land that morning would most likely head straight for the Slinky Dog Dash coaster, and we were right. The line was already at 60 minutes (and it looked packed, too). We had a FP scheduled for later in the day, so I wasn’t worried about trying to get in line at that point. Instead, we decided to take advantage of a normally unheard-of 15-minute wait for Toy Story Mania.
I have always stunk at Toy Story Mania. The pull-string mechanism on the gun has never been my friend—I find it hard to get a good rapid-fire going without cursing myself to permanent carpal-tunnel syndrome for hours afterwards. Even worse, Julie had actually beaten me once at this game (I didn’t even crack 100,000 points), and has never let me hear the end of it. Obviously, that could not be allowed to happen again. So, as with Buzz Lightyear, I cheated and looked up the hints/tricks on YouTube again.
Of course, it’s one thing to know about the hidden secrets in the game. You still have to be able to pull off the shots.
I got to ride with Drew on this one. Being 1) a boy, and 2) 4 years old, he was very excited to shoot a gun at whatever targets he could find. Needless to say, this attraction was right in his wheelhouse.
We got rolling, and I was able to find a shooting position that enabled me to fire quickly without being too uncomfortable. That in turn enabled me to unlock some of the secrets—which was a good feeling, given how badly I’ve done in previous visits. I was able to get the volcano to erupt in the balloon-popping game, get the tank to shoot 5,000-point plates at me in the breaking-dishes game, and open up the giant space robot behind the rocket ship in the ring-toss game. All of these actions netted me some solid points. When I hit the target, anyway.
I ended up with my best score ever!
No, wiseguy, I had the 206,200.
And more importantly, I must note that Julie was also in my vehicle.
After the ride was over, Julie accepted her defeat with class and grace, by which I mean she accused me of cheating and claimed she had a defective gun on her side and the sun was in her eyes and demanded a rematch. I figured her excuses were most likely valid because I know all of you would give me the same benefit of the doubt if the shoe were on the other foot. And there still wasn’t much of a line (the wait was up to 20 minutes), so we jumped right back in for round two. This time I rode with Scotty, who started to struggle halfway through the game with suntan lotion irritating his eyes. Again, if I claimed that, I’m sure you would believe me, so I extended him the same courtesy.
As it turns out, I am remarkably consistent. And I won again!
Julie was undeterred. She still got to see her favorite animated characters of all time.
The line to meet Woody and Jessie extended to Kissimmee, so we bypassed that and instead got in line behind only about 4 families to meet Buzz Lightyear. Buzz was actually really good with the kids. Lots of interaction. Drew really loved him.
Sarah was properly greeted as royalty.
The hero shot:
We decided to try and ride the Alien Swirling Saucers, or AS…(sigh)…2. Crowds were starting to pick up, but the line was still posted at 25 minutes, and we figured it was never going to be any better than that the rest of the day.
As it turned out, we probably waited a little over 30 minutes or so, because the ride went down momentarily a couple of times while we waited. Eventually we made it onboard.
It’s a fun little ride. Best with kids, and worth doing once per visit. I wouldn’t waste a Fastpass or wait any longer than we did, but everybody enjoyed it for what it was.
By now the crowds were streaming into Toy Story Land, and between the masses of people and the sun rising higher in the sky, we were starting to sweat our Alien Swirling Saucers off. We decided to take advantage of 10-minute wait times at Star Tours before the crowds discovered the rest of the park.
As we left, I held my phone up and got the best shot I could of the new Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge expansion. Because I cherish each and every one of my readers and love to reward you, here is an up-to-the-minute look at what the construction progress looked like as of late July 2018.
Stunning, isn’t it? I’m sure they haven’t done much since then.
In all seriousness, I can’t wait to see what it’s like when It’s open. I do love Star Wars, although I’m not the kind of ultra-fan who can name every character and planet. But I think the new rides sound like they’ll be a lot of fun, and I’m sure they’re going to want to knock this one out of the park for the fans (and to ensure sold-out park tickets for months on end).
I just hope the lines have died down in 4-5 years when I actually get the chance to see it.
We made the walk to Star Tours where Drew prepared for his first time on this ride. This is Drew’s Lightsaber Attack Pose.*
*Lightsaber not included.
While we waited for some bathroom breaks, the kids took turns testing out the forest speeder bike nearby.
These are trained professionals. Please, do not try this at home.
I like this one of Drew, because you can virtually hear the sound effects he’s making.
Now it was time for Star Tours. We actually had a Fastpass for it later, but we figured with such a short wait, we might as well go on early.
Longtime readers know that I really love Star Tours, although I have had one ongoing issue with it. Ever since the ride was refurbished and they added the new random destinations and scenes, I have heard rumors of a certain “Darth Vader scene” early in the proceedings where he attacks your starship by using the Force. Said scene is apparently “totally awesome” and “wicked” and “way better than the robot scene”, which of course is the one I always get.
I have been on this ride seven different times since the refurb and never once seen this mystical “Darth Vader scene”. My kids and Julie rode once without me and said they all got the “Darth Vader scene”, and that it was “amazing” and “the best” and “I can’t believe you missed out, but that’s hilarious”.
Anyway, I know better. The “Darth Vader scene” is as real as the Loch Ness Monster. It’s just one of those urban legends that people talk about just to get a rise out of others. Well, I’m not going to dignify their little prank. I know it’s fake news.
We boarded our starship, donned our flight glasses, and took off for the far reaches of the galaxy. We had a great time, and even discovered there was a Rebel spy in our midst…but if Darth Vader knew about it, he sure didn’t show up to do anything. Because, like I said, that scene doesn’t actually exist.
Drew loved the ride, as do the rest of us, so we all decided to jump back in line and ride it again. Maybe ride #9 would be a different experience for me!
Narrator: It wasn’t.
Because, like I said, the “Darth Vader scene” doesn’t actually exist. But, hey--at least we were having fun. Our next stop was the Muppets 3-D movie. Along the way, we saw this:
I can’t wait to see it! Wait, did I already say that?
I know the Muppets 3-D movie has been around forever in Hollywood Studios, but I always enjoy it. Of all the post-Jim Henson era Muppet productions, I feel like this one most captured the spirit of the original Muppet Show. It also has one of the best pre-shows of any of the Disney attractions.
By the way, we also found the key under the mat there. And I like that the Muppet goofiness is carried into the shop next door and around the block.
At that point, we broke out our PB&J sandwiches and ate them in the plaza next to PizzeRizzo. Between us and the people who got pizza there, I’m not sure who had the better meal.
It was time for our Star Tours FP, so we headed back for our third ride of the day. Surely this ride, my tenth attempt overall, would be a different experience.
Actually, it was a different experience. And stop calling me Shirley.
This time, our starship took off, and instead of being stopped by a droid, we made a right turn and suddenly our ship came to a halt as we came face-to-face with a Dark Lord of the Sith. He cut a menacing figure as he announced in that deep, mechanized voice that he was searching for a Rebel spy on our ship. We tried to make an escape, but he held our ship in place by using the powers of the Force. He was toying with us—cutting a figure of pure evil as he tossed our ship to and fro with just a movement of his hand. Finally, we made a desperate move and blasted our way out of the space station, making a narrow escape.
That scene was totally awesome! Wicked! Way better than the robot scene. I was ecstatic—it took me 10 tries, but I’m so glad I finally got to see what it was like to be confronted by Kylo Ren.
I mean, we all know the “Darth Vader scene” doesn’t actually exist. But this one was pretty cool.
We had some time to kill before our next FP, so we went over to catch another old favorite: the Indiana Jones stunt show. Yes, I know this is another one that hasn’t changed in the 30 years the park has been open, but…I don’t care. Raiders of the Lost Ark is my all-time favorite movie, and Indiana Jones is my favorite movie hero, so I’ll always enjoy this one. Plus, I really appreciate all the effort that goes into good stunt work in a movie. These guys really beat themselves up for our entertainment.
Not only that, but there are explosions! You won’t get me to say anything negative about pyrotechnics. They are the bacon of the entertainment world.
It was finally time for our second FP of the day: Slinky Dog Dash. It’s an understatement to say we were all looking forward to trying it. Actually, check that: 5 out of the 6 of us were looking forward to it. Drew wanted no part of the ride.
We didn’t push as hard this time, even though we knew he’d probably enjoy it. We figured his objection was similar to the Barnstormer: from the ground, it looks like there’s a long way to fall with nothing to catch you. Probably intimidating to a 4-year-old.
So, we didn’t make a big deal of it. We just let him hang out with my parents.
When I’d made my FP+ reservations 60 days out, this ride and Flight of Passage were the very first ones I’d reserved. I went back and filled in everything else afterwards. I was really glad I’d done that, too—the lines for this ride never let up the whole time we were there.
We could see storm clouds forming in the sky—the 4:00 Florida Shower was arriving early today. Luckily, we were able to get on the coaster before any rain started.
It’s a really great little coaster! Lots of fun. On the intensity scale, I’d rank it somewhere between the Mine Train and Big Thunder—which is to say, not very intense at all. You get some good speed at the launch and some air time on the first two hills. After that, it’s pretty gentle the rest of the way.
Julie was still shrieking, though. We didn’t make fun of her at all, because we are a kind, loving family. As far as you know.
From there, my parents left to go meet up with my brother and SIL in another part of the park. We were on our own…but we had a lot more on the agenda.
Coming Up Next: There’s one ride I’d never tried at Hollywood Studios. We need to fix that. Plus, this year’s nominee for the Cast Member Hall of Fame.