Third time's the charm...karyn's journal

[karynnix]

Today was a pretty good day. I didn't eat very healthful, but I didn't eat nearly as much!! Last night before bed, I ended up eating a bowl of Frosted Flakes because I was starving. That's what happens when you eat dinner at 3:30!! Weight this morning was 136.2, but I felt really bloated. Fibromyalgia does that to me. This morning, everything hurt and I had a splitting headache. I feel a little better tonight. I made an appointment for Lasik today. I will have the consultation on Saturday at 7:30 am. That's early!! The following week, I have an appointment with a rheumatologist about the fibro and a vein specialist about some veins in my leg. Maybe I will get everything fixed that is broken soon!!

Breakfast: none

Lunch: 3 biscuits and pot pie
some Fritos

Dinner: will be a bowl of Frosted Flakes

What I could have done differently today: I need to exercise, but I'm just too sore and wiped out. I should have eaten some breakfast. I probably could have done without the Fritos, but they were good. I won't feel bad about eating them.

What I did well: I only ate half of the pot pie that I put on my plate. I stopped eating when I was full.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Karyn,

Its nice to see you back on WISH again! I am with you, I won't give up until this whole thing is behind me and I am healthy! You are watching your portions and that is great. Its good to not exercise when you are sore or exhausted. Listening to your body is the best route always! I hope you get your physical issues worked out, that must be so frustrating! Keep up the good work, you can do it!

Amy

 

[karynnix]

Today has been okay. I REALLY wanted some popcorn chicken last night around 9:30. I had a long talk with myself, and decided to wait. So guess what I had for breakfast?? It was good, but not nearly as good as I made it out to be in my mind last night. I'm glad that I made myself wait, though. My weight was back down to 135.2 this morning.

My well-meaning and very sweet neighbor just brought over a cheesecake. That's one of my weaknesses. I had one slice and (though it about killed me) I tossed the rest. I did enjoy my slice! If I had kept it, I would have eaten it all and that would not have been good. Plus, it's not like I threw out a whole meal. Just a distraction.

Breakfast: popcorn chicken

Lunch: Pasta Roni parmesan pasta and a 100 calorie snack

Dinner: cheesecake

I plan to exercise tonight. I'll do my 3 or 4 mile Leslie Sansone.

What I could have done better today: I didn't eat any vegetables. I could have had something better for breakfast, but I had to take care of that craving!

What I did well today: THROWING OUT THE CHEESECAKE!!! Not giving into temptation last night.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Karyn, great job enjoying one piece and throwing the rest out! I have had to do that on several occasions. We have to do what we have to do! Good luck getting the veggies in, its hard but it does help to fill you up and with health in general. Start out slow and work your way up! Keep up your hard work, you can do it!

 

[karynnix]

Today was so-so. Actually, I could have done a LOT better. I have to drive past a Chinese place on my way home from school everyday. They have the best chicken fried rice that I have ever eaten there. It's so tempting. Today was cold and rainy, and rice was just what I needed. I'll pay for it later, though!

Breakfast: 4 mini cheese pizzas from Schwan's

Lunch: chicken fired rice (a wheelbarrow full )

Dinner: I am hungry, but I blew it earlier. I may have to eat a bowl of cereal to be able to sleep. I'll do better tomorrow...

What I did well today: Nothing that I can think of...

What I could have done better: not eat the rice, I should have exercised, no vegetables whatsoever (except the sauce on the pizzas)

 

[karynnix]

My eating habits are just pathetic. I did better today, though.
Last night, when I got hungry, I drank a Slim-Fast shake, and that seemed to take care of the hunger pangs. I was still 135 this morning, so yesterday didn't do any damage!

Breakfast: mini pizzas

Lunch: Huge salad with popcorn chicken, bacon bits, 2 pcs of cheese and ranch dressing (yes, I used full-fat...I can't give up everything!!)

Dinner: Fritos...I could have done a LOT better than that.

I exercised for 30 minutes and drank 36 ounces of water.

What I did well today: that salad and got in some exercise

What I could have done better: not eaten the Fritos

 

[Amy&Dan]

Karyn: Way to go getting that salad in! I used fully fatted dressing too, I dip my fork tines in the dressing. I hate ff salad dressing. Try that trick, it really works and you will use about a tablespoon for a large salad doing that. You are doing so well, don't say you are pathetic! It takes a lot of small steps and you actually took two large ones today!

I love my Fritos too!

 

[karynnix]

Thanks for all of your support, Amy! You are a big encouragement to me.

I didn't post yesterday because DH got home after being gone for 3 weeks and we spent some time together as a family. I did well eating, though.

Breakfast: mini pizzas

Lunch: Schwan's sesame chicken meal with chicken, rice, and 2 vegetable egg rolls (chicken and egg rolls were baked)

Dinner: Frosted Flakes and skim milk

Snack: 2 packs of Swiss Miss hot chocolate

Weight this morning was 134.4, so I must have done well!

What I did well: Only eating when I was hungry, having hot chocolate to satisfy my sweet tooth

What I could have done better: eating more vegetables (of course), I didn't exercise yesterday

 

[karynnix]

I had a good day yesterday...good so far today. With a few exceptions...

Weight this morning was 134.4. Still on track, but I am waiting for the carpet to get pulled out from under me. If I keep doing what I am doing, I should be okay!

Yesterday:

Breakfast: mini pizzas
Lunch: Stoffer's chicken and rice casserole
Dinner: salad with Baco's and cheese (two 2% milk slices) and a little ranch dressing
Snack: Schwan's 100 calorie ice cream

Today:

Breakfast: Krispy Kreme doughnut (that was the first KK doughnut that I have had in YEARS!! I enjoyed every single bite)

Lunch: Cracker Barrel...Egg Beaters
1 pc smoked sausage and 1 pc turkey sausage
grits
1 biscuit with butter and grape jam
few spoonfulls of hashbrown casserole

I'm not really hungry right now, but I will be later. I will probably have a bowl of cereal in an hour or so.

What I did well today: I didn't go overboard at Cracker Barrel

What I could have done better: not eaten the doughnut...but it was so good!!

 

[Amy&Dan]

Karyn if you can only eat one Krispy Kreme and do that well at Cracker Barrell you have some serious will power and dedication! Your food is looking really good, way to go getting those salads in! Keep up the good work, glad your dh is home!

 

[karynnix]

Well, I'm back to 135.4. I can't stand how one bad day can affect my weight so drastically. And it wasn't even that bad of a day!! I feel sometimes like I can't have a treat once in a while because I know I 'll have to pay for it later. Why can't I be one of those women that can eat anything they want and not gain weight?? Arrrgghhh....

Breakfast yesterday: mini pizzas...okay not the BEST choice, but I like them so much!!

Lunch yesterday: spaghetti...I used the Ronzoni Smart Taste pasta and it was great!! Jack ate it with no problem, and if it had tasted differently, he would have noticed. I also used 96% lean ground beef and Ragu pasta sauce.

Snack: FF jello with ff Cool Whip

Dinner: Frosted Flakes

I'll make sure to post tonight with today's damage.

 

[karynnix]

Today has been one of those "why me??" days. Why do I like food so much? Why does everything I eat affect me so strongly? Why is it so important for me to be thin? I have a sis-in-law that apparently has a medical problem that is making her lose weight. For a few moments today, I was actually jealous of her. That's terrible. I should be happy with myself and my weight, but I am not. My self image is linked directly to my weight. I can't seem to shake that.

Breakfast today: mini pizzas

Lunch: Lloyd's bbq on a bun
some Fritos...the LAST of them!! No more temptation!!

Dinner: I have some popcorn chicken in the microwave.

I hope to walk tonight. My daughter has a friend over, so I may have to send her home in a little while to go walk. It's so nice outside today. We got up to 50 degrees!!!

 

[karynnix]

Wow!! I feel great today!! Weight was 135 this morning. I sat down last night and prayed. I prayed that God would help me to accept myself for who I am and my body for what it is. I prayed for Him to help me through this and to give me support. I prayed for energy to exercise and willpower to turn away from the table. I feel like a weight has been lifted off of me, and I know in my heart that God does not want me feeling like I'm not good enough. I have the power now to take control of my life and my self image. I still want to lose weight and get healthier, but it's not going to shape how I feel about myself anymore. If I lose weight, I'll thank God. If I don't, I'll still thank God.

Breakfast: I baked some bread last night and had a piece with light butter

Lunch: 4 small pancakes and 3 pieces of turkey bacon

Dinner: Chicken and mashed potatoes Hormel Compleats meal

I did Leslie Sansone's 4 mile walk/jog DVD today. It lasted 50 minutes, and I did the whole thing!! I feel great after doing that DVD. I walked after dinner for 45 minutes, too!! That's 95 minutes of GOOD exercise today.

What I did well today: Exercising and changing my attitude!!

What I could have done better: I keep saying that I need to eat more vegetables, but I just don't think that will happen. I don't like vegetables, and I haven't eaten them for most of my life. I am happy eating what I do, and I am losing weight (sometimes), so I am not going to push myself to eat something that I really don't like.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Karyn, great job doing that 4 mile routine! That is a serious workout. I have those why me days too and sometimes I think being sick and therefore losing weight wouldn't be all bad. Its terrible and I feel bad but when you are desparate to lose weight, you feel some desparate feelings. Have you tried V8 Fusion? One 8 oz serving has one serving of fruit AND one serving of vegetables. Another WISH member (caitsmama) recommended this and it really has helped me. Try it, I get it at Sams a lot cheaper (its sort of pricey). Getting veggies in is a challenge for me too.

I'll be gone for a few days, I'll "see" you when I get back. Keep up the good work, you can do it!

 

[karynnix]

Weight was 136.4 this morning. What the heck??? I'm guessing the exercise did it. I thought you LOST weight when you exercised!?!? I do feel better gettnig a bit more mobile, but today I am really sore. I'm going to take a break from the DVD and just walk this evening.

Breakfast: Pasta Roni parmesan pasta...I know, I know...I could have had something MUCH better than that. I'm beating myself up over eating it, but what's done is done.

Lunch: grilled chicken and small salad with a tiny bit of ranch dressing

Not hungry right now for dinner, but I probably will be later. It's only 3:00, so there is no telling what the evening will bring! I will walk tonight for at least 45 minutes.

 

[karynnix]

I didn't get to walk last night...things just got too busy. I tried to do a DVD today, but I started feeling rotten and stopped it. The weather has my fibro screaming. I go to a rheumatologist on Monday, and I hope to get some relief soon. I'm ready for bed and it's only 6:00! Weight this morning was 134.2, so I'm moving back in the right direction. I'm back on my Synthroid because my hair started falling out again. That's how I know my thyroid is messed up! Maybe that is helping to speed up the weight loss.

Breakfast: mini pizzas...I got some more from Schwan's yesterday

Lunch: sesame chicken meal with chicken, rice and 2 vegetable egg rolls (that were baked) from Schwan's...I love their food!!

No dinner yet. I just finished Jack's homework and I have some work to do myself. I'm too tired to think about too much right now.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Karyn, hope you are feeling better! Listen to your body, if you aren't up to par then exercise is not wise. I am proud of that grilled chicken and salad lunch you had recently! Keep that up and exercise or no, you'll take off pounds. Again, I hope the meds are making you feel better.

 

[karynnix]

I'm back...again. I can't seem to stay focused on weight loss. I'm still around 136 pounds. I have eaten MUCH MORE than I should have today. I need some will power! We are being transferred to Mississippi in a few months, and the stress is killing me! Plus, I won't be working or going to school when the kids start back next week, so I will have too much free time on my hands. I hope I can use that time to get healthy!! I had my food day all planned out today, and I got off track after breakfast. Yeah, it didn't take long! I really want to do better. I just like food too much. Tomorrow is another day.

Breakfast-Slim fast shake with skim milk

Lunch-I went to a housewarming party at 10:00 and ate 1/2 of a HUGE cinnamon roll, some grapes and a few small cookies. Then I took the kids to Pizza Hut. I had 3 Cheese Rotini pasta and a salad with ranch dressing, bacon bits, and cheese.

Dinner-I made the mistake of bringing home another cinnamon roll. Yep...I ate the whole thing. I can hardly breathe right now. What good does it do when you eat until you are uncomfortable? I'm miserable. I am too full and I feel very disappointed in myself. This has to stop.

 

[Amy&Dan]

Hi Karyn,

First of all, I am so happy to see you again! Tomorrow is a new day. I am right there with you, wanting to lose weight, but seemingly unable to do what it takes to make that happen. But I know we can do it, we may not have found the perfect formula but we are persistant!

Its very hard to do well when you go to a party where you have no control over what is served. Don't beat yourself up. Its over and done with, just start fresh tomorrow.

Are you happy to be moving to Mississippi? I hope so! Don't give up on you, I am not going to that's for sure!

 

[karynnix]

Today was a good day...not great, but better than it has been! Weight this morning was 135.2. Not as bad as I was anticipating after the fiasco yesterday.

I had to take the kids to church this evening to meet with the preacher (they are both getting baptized on Sunday) and we decided to walk the 3/4 mile. I can't wait for DH to get home in a few days so that I can get back to walking in the evenings. I'll miss this neighborhood when we move. It's great for walking. The move is going to be good. We are going to a great city with LOTS of history. We'll be much closer to our families. I'll get to homeschool the kids. But for now, we are just waiting. Waiting for the house to sell. Waiting for the orders to move. Waiting...waiting. I hate not being in control of things.

Breakfast-Honey Nut Cheerios and skim milk

Lunch-Spam Singles (Light) on bread with a little mayo and some coleslaw

Dinner-some chicken bites from Schwan's and I ate a few bites of Katelyn's waffle that she didn't eat. I didn't even want it. It was cold and didn't taste all that great. I just ate it because it was there. I need to stop doing that if I am going to get healthy.

Snack-about 8:45, I got hungry. My stomach was growling, and I knew that I would need to eat something so I could sleep. I got a packet of Simple Harvest oatmeal and made it with skim milk.

I feel a bit more in control today. Let's see if I can stick with it!!