They Call Me MISTER PIG- He Said, She Said (9/1 Lights, Thunder, Fantasmic? Page 47)

[karajeboo]

Becca - sounds like things are definitely starting to settle down. Just don't forget to take time for YOU! And despite what He says, don't let your guard down just yet. Continue to protect yourself and your babies.

 

[LuccaDrake]

Pheeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww....huge sigh of relief there. I'm so glad to read that some positive things are happening in your life. Nice to hear that Matt is going to see someone and is trying to mend his relationship with Cat. I hope you will talk with someone yourself. Also super happy to hear that the studio is being flexible. Obviously you have a great kiddo since they want her to stay on teams! I am sorry to hear about your good friend, but it sounds like he's on the up and up. One of the ways sepsis occurs is when your appendix ruptures spilling bacteria into your insides and pretty much infecting everything. It can be treated with strong IV antibiotics and hopefully he'll get better soon. I can't wait for your TR update, too! You could always make something up for the He's part. But it will be great either way!



~Beka~

 

[sunnyday123]

Becca,

my prayers and wishes go out to your friend. I think the fact that you are worried about a friend when you are going through all of this truly shows us what kind of person you are.

Glad He is going to see someone. He has some issues ( not being mean ) that need to be worked through. And I'm also glad to see you are stepping back and looking at what would be best for you. Things happen for a reason and while it would be great if all parents could stay together, sometimes it's not the best thing for everyone involved.

Getting Cat to see a therapist is great. My dd went for years, and really knows how to deal with some of the crap her dad unloads on her. She truly is the adult in their relationship, and while that bites, I know it would be that way if he lived with us. Sometimes it's the idea of a father and not the actual father that they miss. ( Same thing with a broken marriage, I missed the idea of a marriage....)You have to put the three of you back together and do what is right for you and the kids. Take things slow, and like someone else said, don't let your guard down.

have a wonderful weekend!!

 

[brookelizabeth]

Glad to hear things are a bit better for you. Please let us know how Wall-E goes tonight for Cat and He.

And prayers for your friends recovery.

 

[ChevyNat]

I happy to see that you are doing better... I really found (or re-found) myself, once my Husband left. I'm rediscovering myself and doing things that I love, with my kids.
It will get better each day...
My thoughts and prayers are with your friend and his sister... every little thought helps!
Take care!

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Hooray that Cat is feeling better! (and you, too, of course)

I laughed about the Legally Blonde part. That's one of my favorite 'girl-power' musicals, and "Positive" is such a fun song!

Good news about your studio

Let me know if I can talk to Cat or you!

 

[Camster0307]

Sometimes it's the idea of a father and not the actual father that they miss. ( Same thing with a broken marriage, I missed the idea of a marriage....)You have to put the three of you back together and do what is right for you and the kids. Take things slow, and like someone else said, don't let your guard down.

have a wonderful weekend!!

I have this to be so true in my circumstance as well. Well said!

 

[stagemomx3]

I hope your weekend is going ok!

 

[brandi~momof3]

prayers for your friend, sepsis is scary-I am glad he is getting better.
That is great the dance studio is working with you
you and the kids are still in my thoughts and prayers

 

[MAJ RN]

Becca, Happy to hear that you a doing a little better. You are very strong and will come through all of this on top. That is so wonderful that the dance school is being so helpful. Best Wishes


Melissa

 

[Microcell]

Hi Becca. I sat and read your trip report last night. I can't imagine the same guy that wrote that TR with you up and left you and the kids. I will admit though that when I saw your beautiful family picture I wondered what HE had done to get someone as pretty as you I know it's hard right now, but when you come out on the other side you might find that it was for the best.

Ditto! I just spent the better part of the afternoon thinking that humor wise you seem like a great pair (like my DH and I- though looks wise I am the one people wonder about him choosing ). Take heart, though my DH and I never utter the "D" word, we have had our share of fights. If you do try to work things out you have to commit to weather anything that happens.



In case "He" is reading this, yes, even 30 years later, the pain of divorce is still rather searing from the kid's perspective. The truth will out and if you think for one moment she won't know you were in the wrong, you are kidding yourself.

Becca, sounds like you might already know about the childs perspective of divorce yourself, but just a friendly reminder to tell your DD all the time that none of this is her fault, she needs to hear that. I remember to this day thinking, "if I was nicer, or if I could have convinced him not to leave us". I also had an unfortunate burden when my mom was close to death (she had basically given up living for the last year of her life) and had to take care of everything for her. She told me not so say anything to anyone about her lack of a job (she had been fired for a mistake), though my crap father knew, but my uncle would have stepped in had he known. My mom said not to say anything, and I did what my mom said. Once she died my entire family told me I should have told them what was going on. At 16 I took the blame for her death too. I really wish I would have had someone point out that I was just a kid and couldn't possibly have the power to kill someone or split up a family before I was 25 and my husband had to do it.

I will say a double prayer for your friend, my DD had a ruptured Appendix at 5 and almost died. We figured out something was wrong when she was in acute pain, and by that point her bowels were shutting down, she was dying for all intents and purposes. Makes me want to cry when I think about it. They had her on antibiotics or 10 days as general practice, and she was very, very ill for every day of it. There is no worse feeling than watching your baby and not being told if she would live or not. They really would not say "oh get out of here, she will be alright" It was alot of "I would rather not say just yet" or "we will keep monitoring" when the surgeon was asked point blank if she would live. **NOTE TO HE-Then you know, without a moments hesitation that you will die for your children! I would have given anything to have traded places with her. I certainly wouldn't dream of ever leaving her. Anyway, she turned around pretty well once we got her home. Hopefully your friend will as well. He may just be feeling worse because his bowels are "waking up" again.

I need to go because that same girl so close to death five years ago went with a friend to a 4H show to watch her friend ride, and will undoubtedly want to join, and I orignally came on at 2PM to learn about 4H- I was raised in Deeetroit, what do I know about 4H?

 

[nts4wdw]

Thinking of you

 

[dis75ney]

I showed her the MTV airing of the Musical from You Tube and she was like I can do that! And I said "Not Until-" And she finished with "college". Man do I have my baby all sorts of brain washed or what? She has a list a million miles long of alll the things she can't do until college. When she finally goes I am going to be so freaked.

-Becca-

That's okay - I have a laundry list of things my DS7 can't do until he's 30 and married. This includes dating...although he is already engaged to a girl from last year's class. Doesn't help that he's a gigantic flirt...

 

[jake&samsmom]

Hi there, Becca...
I learned abut your TR from a nice Disser I met on a Disney shuttle bus headed to the Magic Kingdom last week. I just wanted to drop in and tell you how sorry I am for everything that has happenned to you and Cat and Baby. You are in my prayers. Stay strong.
Jen

 

[stagemomx3]

Just checking in on you.

 

[reelmom]

I hope that no news is good news. Continuing to pray for you and Matt and the kids.

 

[dad2t&e]

Becca ,

I’ve started reading your trip report and got to the part where the things that have totally shook up your life. My prayers and wishes go out to your, your family and your friend. The things that you have to worry about and still have time to worry about your friend shows what kind of person you are. Pretty special.
You are much stronger than you realize. It sounds like some things are starting to settle down and that’s great. Just don't forget to take some time for YOU and don't let your guard down just yet, despite what he might say or do. REMEMBER to always protect yourself and your children FIRST.
There are many issues that still need to be worked through. Sometimes stepping back and looking at what would be best for you and your children is what needs to be done. Things happen for a variety of reasons and while it would be great if all parents could stay together, sometimes it's not the best thing for everyone involved. I am not saying that all this won’t work out, only that it can’t be fixed overnight. I hope you will talk with someone yourself as well as getting help for your daughter .
You have to do what is right for you and the kids. Take things slow, and like several others have said, don't let your guard down.

 

[LuccaDrake]

Hey Becca, just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you. I hope all is well and that your friend is getting even better.

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
-Eleanor Roosevelt-



~Beka~

 

[SnowWhite607]

Hey Becca, just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you. I hope all is well and that your friend is getting even better.

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
-Eleanor Roosevelt-



~Beka~

I really like that quote. Kinda reminds me of one that a friend used to say to me - no one can walk all over you unless you lay down and let them.

 

[creativeamanda]

Becca, you and your family have been on my heart for a while now. I think about all of you daily. The sun will rise on all of this ugliness. Might not be today, might not be tomorrow. It will happen though. And you will be stronger because of it.

If He is reading (and I'm sure He is), He needs to know that marriage is hard work. Marriage evolves into something that is not equal to the first days when you can't imagine talking to your spouse every five minutes. It's not easy, and it's never going to be perfect, but it takes work. You have to decide if your marriage is important to you. You have to decide if your children are important. At this point, the kids will see that you walked out on not your wife, but on them. A refusal to go into counseling for your family is tantamount to saying you don't care about your children, and that you are putting your wants in front of your family. Marriage and family means sacrifice. The most harsh thing done was chosing to come out with this on the anniversary of your marriage.

Okay, I've said it. I'm pretty sure he reads this, so I've put it out there in the most honest and understanding way I can. That being said, Becca, you are still very much in my prayers. I know your heart hurts. We are all here for you.