Okay, so it's not like we three ever called ourselves the Illuminati, or met anyone who did, or even discussed it at all. But Maria was our superb server at Rose and Crown, and I didn't come up with a real title last time. This was the best I could do today.
And no, it's not raining today, in case you were wondering. So I blame it on the sunshine. Only there's no song with those particular lyrics. For which you're probably grateful.
Anyway. Moving on.
Or not moving on quite yet, because you should brace yourself. There are no photos in this post. Well, in between typing this sentence and the last in the post, I may decide to look up and then purloin something online, but I don't have any pictures that I took.
Yes, this is the Illuminations post. And we did indeed see Illuminations. And it was indeed marvelous, and we did go "ooh" and "ahh" and applaud. But my mad skillz don't cross over to taking fireworks photos, even though my camera ostensibly is capable of taking fireworks shots if I feed it filet mignon with a 1945 Cabernet or put its profile on an online dating site and hook it up with its one true love, or if I read the manual and learn what are the proper settings for fireworks shots. But alas, I was all out of Cabernet, it cost way too much to connect to the Internet, and I'd left the manual at home. Even if I'd had time for the Internet or to read the manual. So there will be no fireworks shots.
At least, none of mine.
So now we're moving on.
Again, please don't cheer too loudly.
So there we were, at the Rose and Crown, waiting for our table, which we hoped would be on the patio. And it was! But not at a prime Illuminations-viewing spot. Instead we were on the left edge, second table from the very back. If we craned our necks, we might have been able to make out a sliver of the stuff that was done on the water. So we resigned ourselves to enjoying our meal and then migrating over to the front of the patio when it was time for Illuminations to begin.
We cast uneasy looks at the sky, since it was still cloudy and showed signs of wanting to dump more precipitation on us. Our wonderful server, Maria, assured us that they wouldn't cancel Illuminations, since it had gone on in the past even when it was pouring.
Melneth had the fish and chips. Nevi had the Bangers and Mash, but substituted bread pudding for the cabbage. I also had the Bangers and Mash, but stuck with the cabbage.
Everything tasted good for English food, which has never been my favorite. But we were there for the fireworks and not necessarily the food.
As we ate, the last of my headache disappeared and I returned to my more chipper self. But I did tell Nevi and Melneth that I wasn't going to be the first one up the next morning. I couldn't take the four-hour nights much longer. They agreed, but didn't select who would be the sacrificial lamb.
Not that sacrificial lamb makes terribly much sense in that context. But I have intelligent readers, so I'm sure you understand what I mean.
Meals finished, we considered dessert, all deciding upon the sticky toffee pudding, and ensured with Maria that it'd be all right to eat and then head on down to the patio. "Yes, but hold on a second. Let me go see what I can do."
Whenever a CM says "Let me go see what I can do," you know it's something good.
Sure enough, Maria returned shortly. "Okay, I can get you a table on the lower patio and you can eat your dessert there for Illuminations. Will that work for you?"
"Yes!" we screeched in unison.
So she took us to the lower patio and showed us to our table, which was at the far right edge. We got ourselves situated, ignoring the increasing gloom of the clouds in the dying light. Maria SuperCM had told us that Illuminations would still go on, and we placed our faith in her. Had she not gotten us the fantabulous table? And was she not the bringer of Sticky Toffee Pudding, which we all devoured with numerous moans of pleasure? Did she not get an excellent tip?
Yes, yes she did. But that was later.
Melneth explained that Illuminations was meant to sort of encapsulate Earth's history in a 13-minute timespan. I forget if she'd read that in the Unofficial Guide or if she happened upon it before the trip as she was researching the Touring Plans (which I'd sent to both Nevi and Melneth for their approval). It was a factoid that sounded familiar when she mentioned it, but I'd forgotten it somewhere along the way.
Nevi, epitome of affability that she is, was just happy to be there. Illuminations could've been meant to present the history of toast and she would've been fine.
About fifteen minutes before start-time, it began to rain again. We got out our umbrellas to protect ourselves and the last few crumbs of our Sticky Toffee Pudding. Another group of people came down to the lower patio and stood to our left. As the rain increased, we invited them to sit down, but they informed us they weren't paying guests, so they weren't actually allowed to sit.
Having never seen Illuminations before, I can't compare our viewing spot to another, but the lower patio was spectacular. We had an unobstructed view; not even the overhead canopy troubled us. And of course there were no heads to peer over. We could feel the heat from the pyrotechnics--not unwelcome due to the rain. And Nevi and Melneth were so engrossed (well, I like to think they were so engrossed) that at least five minutes of me alternately poking first one, and then the other, with my umbrella (we'd tried to use them to make a sort of screen to cover the three of us). After Nevi let out an "Ow!" I endeavored to be more still.
The part I remember best is the Earth Globe, which, on a later Gratuitous Video, I mimed using my hand in an upturned position, with the fingers meeting together. As I twirled my hand around, I came up with this brilliant description: "Spinny spinny glowy pretty!"
"And don't forget how it opened up!" Nevi said, putting her hand into the frame, again upturned, with the fingers meeting. Then she opened her palm.
"Oooh," Melneth and I said in unison, reenacting our reactions.
That video, the lengthiest of our GVs, is my favorite. If my mad skillz extended to video editing and I could figure out how to blot out Nevi and Melneth's faces, I might have tried to include a clip of it. But I'm the one who can't even take fireworks pictures. So you're stuck with the typing out of "Spinny spinny glowy pretty!"
Your mouse is right there. You can close out of the post at anytime.
Only if you do, don't tell me. Since I have a fragile ego and all.
Illuminations ended and we clapped madly, then waited for SuperMaria to bring us our bill. "How was the show?" she asked in her delightful English accent.
Did I mention that we found Maria delightful on the whole?
We enthused over Illuminations and Maria smiled and left us our bill. We looked at the suggested 20% tip and then gave her more than that.
By the time we finished paying our bill, the Mass Exodus was largely over and we were able to stroll out of the park without having our feet trampled or getting shoved by other departing guests. It was an excellent way to end out our penultimate night in the World.
So yeah. I recommend the Rose and Crown for viewing Illuminations. And if you can get Maria for your server, you will be more than set.
As long as you've properly bribed your own camera into taking decent fireworks pictures, that is.
Up Next: Our last full day, Part 1.
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