The Official New Mom Thread

[tkyes]

Happy Birthday Joats!! {{{hugs}}} Next time you're at the store, get yourself a big, sugar-loaded cupcake!

tamie

 

[Alice28]

lissawynn: that checkout girl was a total jerk. I would be writing a letter to the store manager on that one.

joats: yes, I think it's possible to be so exhausted and distracted from baby that he forgot. I bet it was a case of, "I have to get my wife a card....gotta remember that...need to go get her a present..." And then every time his brain tried to store that info, he got distracted with baby or people trying to visit baby, or whatever. It sucks, but I'm sure he meant to! Definitely go get some cake or buy yourself your favorite stuff from Bath and Body Works and try and move on. Maybe you can hint that you can celebrate your bdays together and he can have a second chance to go get you something.

 

[DisKim]

lissawynn - I can't stand when people complain about their jobs and act like it is your fault because you had the nerve to be a customer.

joats - I would be upset too. That being said, I have been very forgetful from the lack of sleep due to the baby. Your DH is probably the same way. I know it's upsetting, but I would forgive him and move on. I think Alice 28's idea of celebrating your birthdays together is a great idea.

I feel like a single mother lately. My DH has started his graduate work. OMG , I did not realize how much work two courses would be. He is also working during the day. It seems like every day this week he has looked at the kids for two seconds and gotten to work on the computer for the rest of the day/night. He actually asked me to take the kids out for at least six hours so he could get work done. I understand he needs to concentrate but I have three kids. I'm scared to take them out alone for six hours! I solved the situation by making my bedroom into a "movie theater" for them and letting the shamelessly watch hours of dvd's. They loved it. So, for those of you whose DH's work a lot or are away, how do you deal with it? I don't want to be a whiny wife. We both dreamed of going to graduate school when we got married. He is doing it first and I need to support him as I expect him to support me when I go for my graduate degree.

 

[Tasha+Scott]

I posted this on the CB but thought I would post it here too since I know several of you are teachers:

Hey, everyone! Well, I have really been thinking about going back to school and majoring in elementary education. I took the year off from school last year since I was preg. and I kept changing my major anyway. I am pretty sure that I want to go into teaching. I kind of always have but didn't know if it was worth it since the pay isn't as great as it rightfully should be but now I have decided money isn't everything if you aren't happy with what you are doing. SO I am thinking that I want to go into it afterall. I am going to go to the college either today, tomorrow, or next week sometime and talk to an advisor/counselor about it. I already have quite a few classes under my belt but some of them won't transfer into my major. I guess that's what happens when you change your major too many times! I plan to take online classes so I won't need a babysitter other than when I need to go to the school to take my exams. Anyone on here teach elementary school? Or are you all in secondary education? Either way since I know several of you are teachers I'd like to know what the pros and cons are of your job. I don't care if you teach HS instead of elementary school b/c I may go into secondary education instead if it seems like something I would rather do. I am not sure yet. Please share your experiences with me though so I can have some info. of some sort!

 

[lissawynn]

joats Happy belated birthday! I'm so sorry your DH forget your first mommy "holiday". I would have killed my DH if he had forgotten my b-day. I don't think my sister would have allowed that, though. She was the one who picked out the gift he got me.

Tasha+Scott If teaching is what you want to do, go for it. It takes a special person to teach elementary school, IMO. I know I couldn't do it. Teaching 7th graders takes all the patience I have.

DisKim I'm sure your DH appreciates the sacrifice you're making for him. I'm sure he'll do the same thing for you when you go back for your degree. I'm considering returning to school in the fall for my principal's certificate. It will probably take me 2-3 years to finish the classes, but I know my DH will do whatever he can to help out.

Jimmy and I are going to visit my gramma. DH's nan was here yesterday for a visit. Have a great day!

 

[Alice28]

DisKim- Well, coming from someone who has been a "single mom" now for 10+ months, it's hard. Really hard sometimes. And I've learned a lot. Sometimes marriage isn't always about equality. Sometimes it isn't fair. Sometimes you have to give a LOT more than you take to make it work. Sometimes you just have to "do" and then "do" some more to make things smooth. Just keep telling yourself that what your husband is doing is so worth it in the long run and someday you will have your turn to either go to school or whatever it is you want to do. Just please consider my advice and don't whine----from experience it will only make your husband more irritable! If you need a break, request it calmly & straight up instead of hinting, whining, expecting him to read your mind, etc. Trust me, I have been there, done that & learned my lesson.

Tasha- I have a BA in Child Developement, which I intended to use for teaching K-6. (I took the courses for that age vs. young childhood). I substitute taught those grades for about a year, and then moved to Oregon, where the licensing laws are different than CA. So, I started to prep for getting into the license program here in OR.What a nightmare. Long story short, it didn't happen cause I got pregnant with Sam. I did before and after school care for 70 kids for 8 years & that brought me a lot of fulfillment. I love that age and I encourage you to do it. The other side for me is now it would cost me approx. $12,000 for my one year of school I need to do. Which makes me choke cause to get my BA in California, I think it cost my parents under $5,000 (I lived at home and did the first two years at a Comm. College). I'm not sure what the heck I am going to do when I start working again, if I start working again, but it would take a lot of years of teaching to earn that $12,000 back. Good luck and I completely understand your fascination with that age- I LOVE it!

 

[lissawynn]

Ladies, I have found nirvana! For the last couple of weeks, Jimmy hasn't napped for longer than 30 minutes (at the most). It's not that I don't love playing with him during the day, but I still have laundry, cleaning, etc. to do. Yesterday, while he was playing on the floor, he rolled over and fell asleep on his tummy. The little monkey slept for about and hour and a half.
When he started to fuss today (after a 15 minutes cat nap on our way home from visiting my gramma), I put him in his crib on his tummy. I did have to go in and settle him a few times, but he's still sleeping! We're going on 2 1/2 hours! I got two loads of laundry done, hosed off our front porch, scrubbed the outside table, etc.
I'm going to wake him soon so he isn't up all night long, but I just had to share my joy with all of you!

 

[Alice28]

Ladies, I have found nirvana! For the last couple of weeks, Jimmy hasn't napped for longer than 30 minutes (at the most). It's not that I don't love playing with him during the day, but I still have laundry, cleaning, etc. to do. Yesterday, while he was playing on the floor, he rolled over and fell asleep on his tummy. The little monkey slept for about and hour and a half.
When he started to fuss today (after a 15 minutes cat nap on our way home from visiting my gramma), I put him in his crib on his tummy. I did have to go in and settle him a few times, but he's still sleeping! We're going on 2 1/2 hours! I got two loads of laundry done, hosed off our front porch, scrubbed the outside table, etc.
I'm going to wake him soon so he isn't up all night long, but I just had to share my joy with all of you!

WOO HOO! Molly is the same way when she naps on her tummy...she'll sometimes sleep for up to 3 hours! Since she has only had a tiny nap this AM, I am hoping for a good nap this afternoon! Ihope so since my house is a pigpen and I have 5 loads of laundry to fold!

 

[castlegazer]

I began sleeping my daughter on her tummy a few weeks ago and she now sleeps thru the night - from 8:30 - 5 am! Its been heaven, and I too found that she will nap on weekends, which she wouldn't before, when she is on her tummy too. She had reflux, so I think that made sleeping on her back a little painful for her. She's over it now, but she still really prefers her tummy.

Good for you!!!

 

[Tasha+Scott]

Kylie likes to lay on her stomach when I rock her and I know she prefers laying that way but I haven't actually let her sleep on her stomach when I am not holding her yet. I think she'd be fine b/c she is extremely strong for an 8 week old and can lift her head and turn it from side to side easily so I am sure suffocation wouldn't be an issue. Yet I am still a paranoid 1st time mommy so that's why I haven't. Maybe in a few weeks I will. Besides she is trying really hard to roll from her back onto her stomach. She hasn't quite done it yet but she's getting close. Once she learns how to do that it will be much harder to control how she sleeps.

Alice~ I taught preschool for a year and it could be stressful at times but I still really enjoyed it which is why I am seriously considering elem. ed. I really like that age group too. I went and registered at our comm. college a few hours ago. It is not only cheaper but it offers more online than the university does. I plan to get an associates degree and then transfer to the university to earn my bachelors and maybe even my masters eventually. The university is 2 hours from here and the cc is only 15 min. from here which is another reason I am going there 1st. It just makes more sense right now and will save us a lot of money. Like you said universities are really expensive now! I am so excited to be going back to school (starting Aug. 22) even if my classroom will be my home computer for a couple of years. It's the best of both worlds--I get to stay home w/Kylie and work towards my degree at the same time!

 

[J&D]

lissawynn- My DD has started to do the same. That is how she puts herself to sleep at night. We flip her back over before we go to sleep. Still nervous about having her sleep all night on her tummy.


Have a great July 4th, everyone!

 

[Gwene65]

Isn't it funny that all of our babies are tummy sleepers? My DS slept on his back no problem, but not DD.

I just got back from her 4 month check up. She had to get her immunizations, and she didn't cry too much this time around. I held her and gave her some tylynol and she seems ok right now. Just a little fever. Hopefully she will sleep good tonight.

Tasha, I read your teaching thread. I always wanted to be a teacher, if not exclusive history then grade school. I think you should go back and get your teaching degree.

Guess that's all for now.

 

[MommyPoppins]

Only one of my DS's have slept on their back. I tried all of them that way but they just wouldn't sleep. Kaleb sleeps anyway now that he rolls and scoots all over his crib. He is days away from getting his 2 bottom teeth too. I can see them. They get big so fast.

 

[DisKim]

Thanks for the advice ladies - I went shopping the last two days and that made me feel better. I actually took all three kids with me and they were good!

Tasha - Ask me anything you want about the teaching profession. I love it! I teach high school though. I could never teach elementary. I was a substitute in an elementary school for a couple of days and I could not figure out how to control the little buggers, nor could I get anything done with them because I didn't have the heart to interrupt them when they were telling me "stories". As far as the pay goes, consider the fact that your salary is for 10 months, not 12. Also, consider the amount of time you'll have off with Kylie. I've been teaching for 8 years and I think the pay is very good. You also have good benefits. It is the best job for a mother IMHO. I would say the negative for me is dealing with administrators, but that's just my school. It is not run very well and there is alot of favoritism. Really, any of the negative aspects of my job that I can think of stem from the fact that I am a high school teacher or are specific to my school.

 

[joats]

Thanks everyone for my bday wishes.

I just wanted to give an update: DH made me a fabulous dinner the day after my birthday: filet mignon (Mmm-Mmm). He also surprised me by picking up a small version of our wedding cake that is my absolute favorite dessert (choc. cake w/choc. mousse and cheesecake - it's out of this world). That night after dinner I went to get the baby up and in his bassinet was a card addressed to me from Jace (which is really all I wanted). DH really made me feel special. It really didn't matter it was a day late.

Today is DH birthday, (and like Alice28 said) - I've been trying to remember to wish him a Happy Birthday and get his cards together. I'm having a hard time getting anything done. It also gives me a little more forgiveness for DH - it is hard to focus on anything but Jace and our exhaustion.

Tomorrow night my parents are coming to watch Jace so we can go out to dinner to celebrate our birthdays.

So, thanks again. I appreciate your support!

T & S: I think you should go for it!! I originally thought about being a teacher myself. I went to observe classrooms a few times and then realized I clearly didn't have the patience for teaching.

 

[Tasha+Scott]

Tasha - Ask me anything you want about the teaching profession. I love it! I teach high school though. I could never teach elementary. I was a substitute in an elementary school for a couple of days and I could not figure out how to control the little buggers, nor could I get anything done with them because I didn't have the heart to interrupt them when they were telling me "stories". As far as the pay goes, consider the fact that your salary is for 10 months, not 12. Also, consider the amount of time you'll have off with Kylie. I've been teaching for 8 years and I think the pay is very good. You also have good benefits. It is the best job for a mother IMHO. I would say the negative for me is dealing with administrators, but that's just my school. It is not run very well and there is alot of favoritism. Really, any of the negative aspects of my job that I can think of stem from the fact that I am a high school teacher or are specific to my school.

Well, last night I talked to Dh. He used to work in an elem. school and he told me that the demand for elem. school teachers in our area is extremely low. He said for every job opening there were literally dozens of applicants. So now I am not sure that I want to do elem. ed. b/c I don't want to go to school for years and then not be able to find a job! I am seriously considering sec. ed. now and trying to find a job at a high school. They are always looking for teachers around here so I know I could find a job anyway. You said to ask you anything so I do have one question. On the thread I posted on the CB a lot of people were saying I shouldn't major in elem. or sec. ed.--that I should major in a chosen field such as Eng. or Journalism and then get my masters in it. What do you think? I am thinking about doing that b/c I think it would also give me something to fall back on if teaching doesn't work out but I am not 100% decided on anything at this point. Did you major in sec. ed. or did you major in a certain field? I wonder how much easier it would be to get a job with a degree in a certain field. Thanks for the info. you have given me so far and thanks for whatever you will give me later! I am taking classes this fall that will go towards any of the majors I would be considering as well as toward sec. ed. or elem. ed. so I don't have to make any major decisions this semester. Of course I would like to but at least I will be taking classes and earning credits until I do decide.

Anyway, Sunday is my dad's b-day and he has invited us to his house along with my brothers, sisters, stepsister and her boyfriend, and my stepmother's parents. They have not seen Kylie since I was still in the hospital with her so they will be in for a shock when they see how big she has gotten since then! Monday we are going to Scott's family's house for the 4th. I really think they would all faint if there wasn't a get together for every single holiday but that's okay. I am actually looking forward to it for a change. I like getting out of the house with Kylie. It helps her sleep better. She and I ran around all day yesterday looking into the whole college thing, grocery shopping, etc. She was so tired last night that she slept 8 hours straight! She woke up earlier long enough to eat and play a little bit and now she is sleeping again! Tues. she goes for her shots. Then I am going to let her rest the rest of the week and she gets her pictures taken Sat., the 9th. Phew! I am getting tired just typing what all we have planned next week! Hope all of you have a wonderful 4th of July weekend!

 

[Alice28]

Tasha, that is another reason I have decided to not get my Oregon license....so many applicants for positions around here, it's very hard to get a elem. teaching job. My advisor told me that the way to go is to teach science or math at the jr. high or high school level----lots of openings for those positions.

Either way I commend you for wanting to continue your education! Woo Hoo!

 

[lissawynn]

Re: teaching positions Twenty teachers retired in my district this year. Most of them were in the elementary schools. Unfortunately, 6 1/2 of their positions have been cut due to low enrollment in one of our elementary schools. For the elementary jobs the district does have to fill, they will receive hundreds of applications. There are just too many elem. certified teachers and not enough positions.

 

[DisKim]

I just took Aidan in the pool for the first time. He was so cute. He loved it! He was so relaxed in the water that he fell asleep on my shoulder. I took him out of the pool and he slept on my chest on a lounge chair . There's nothing like a baby sleeping on your chest.

Tasha - When I went to college, I considered getting certified in elementary ed. I decided to go secondary when the dean of education came in and told us not to major in elementary because there were no jobs. He also said not to major in english or history for the same reason. Well, I stuck with english and I had a very hard time finding a job. Honestly, it is something you should really consider before committing yourself to a program. I graduated in 1994 and did not find a steady job until 1996. I went to a prestigious college, graduated with honors and participated in tons of organizations and honor societies. None of that seemed to matter when it came to looking for a job. No one cared that I did honors research, etc. It was very depressing. I had to teach in two really tough school districts. My first job was in an urban district whose budget never passed. The district had to cut the 7 newest teachers, so I got cut since I was the newest. Then, I got hired at an alternate high school. These were the kids that were too bad for the regular high school. I taught in a trailer across from what was known as "the jungle" because of all the drug dealing and murders that happened there. Kids got arrested right out of my classroom. I could just go on with stories from there. Luckily, I only had to work there for 4 months before I got hired in the district I'm currently working for. I have to say that I sometimes marvel at the fact that I got hired in my district based on my own merit. It seems that jobs in my district are gotten on the basis of who you know and not what you know. It sometimes makes for very poor choices in staff. I'm kind of rambling here, but I thought I'd share my experience. Was it hard? Yes. Would I do it again? Yes. I'd even go back to the jungle if I had to. I love what I do and I love watching my students experience classic novels for the first time. It is so exciting to me. Could you major in both elementary ed and something else? My DH went to college for elementary ed, but he was also a psych major. Now, he works with computers - go figure! I majored in english, psychology and secondary ed was considered a "program", not a major. I say go for what is really in your heart and maybe pick up a second major on the side just in case. You could try working in a couple of districts as a substitute. That's a good way to get your foot in the door. Student teaching also gives you a chance to network. My student teacher got lucky and was hired for a position in my school as soon as she was finished. One last thing, don't forget about the most important perk to teaching - you will be off when Kylie is off. You will also be home early in the day. I get out of school at 2pm. I have lots of time with the kids and I don't have to worry about what to do with them in the summer or during school breaks.

 

[Tasha+Scott]

Thanks Alice, lissawynn, and DisKim for the replies! I guess I will def. need to rethink going into elem. ed. at this point. I was thinking of majoring in Eng. and Journalism since those are the areas I excel in but I had suspected that they were not as easy to find a job with and what Alice and DK wrote only helps to confirm it. I also really like science but am not sure if it is something I would enjoy majoring in or not. I guess I really have a lot to look into and consider first. If nothing else I could always get my liberal arts degree at the comm. college and go from there. I guess after I have researched it better I will have a better idea of what I want to do. My second choice for a career is journalism but that's another limited career field in my area. Too bad I like all of the limited jobs. If I wanted to be a nurse I would have no trouble finding a job! Oh, well. I will do some soul-searching and sort it out before long. For now I am just happy that I will finally be on the path to finishing my degree! Wish me luck! And DisKim, thanks for your last post. That answered a lot of questions for me!