Dax
Emma and Christopher's Mommy - Best job ever
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2000
- Messages
- 4,171
The Explanation of Life
Makes sense to me . . . .
On the first day God created the cow.
God said, "You must go to field with the farmer all
day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and
give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a
life span of sixty years."
The cow said, "That's a kind of a tough life you want
me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty years
and I'll give back the other forty."
And God agreed.
On the second day, God created the dog.
God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and
bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will
give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me
ten years and I'll give back the other ten."
So God agreed (sigh).
On the third day God created the monkey.
God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make
them laugh. I'll give you a twenty year life span."
Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty
years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so
that's what I'll do too, okay?"
And God agreed again.
On the fourth day God created man.
God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do
nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you twenty
years."
Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way, man.
Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty cow
gave back, and the ten dog gave back and the ten
monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."
So that is why for the first twenty years we eat,
sleep, play, have sex, enjoy, and do nothing; for the
next forty years we slave in the sun to support our
family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to
entertain our grandchildren; and for the last ten
years we sit in front of the house and bark at
everybody.
Life has now been explained.
Makes sense to me . . . .
On the first day God created the cow.
God said, "You must go to field with the farmer all
day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and
give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a
life span of sixty years."
The cow said, "That's a kind of a tough life you want
me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty years
and I'll give back the other forty."
And God agreed.
On the second day, God created the dog.
God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and
bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will
give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me
ten years and I'll give back the other ten."
So God agreed (sigh).
On the third day God created the monkey.
God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make
them laugh. I'll give you a twenty year life span."
Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty
years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so
that's what I'll do too, okay?"
And God agreed again.
On the fourth day God created man.
God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do
nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you twenty
years."
Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way, man.
Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty cow
gave back, and the ten dog gave back and the ten
monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."
So that is why for the first twenty years we eat,
sleep, play, have sex, enjoy, and do nothing; for the
next forty years we slave in the sun to support our
family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to
entertain our grandchildren; and for the last ten
years we sit in front of the house and bark at
everybody.
Life has now been explained.
