Well, here's the thing...(can't believe I am actually admitting this...) in my family, I am a TRUE winner. I have the coolie gifts, have my 'stuff' together, etc. Now, you have heard some of my tales of reality, so you are now thinking, "She's a "winner" in her family??" Yes, it's true. My sibs are all kinds of trouble (Bro borrows money from the folks only to turn around lend it to his in-laws, sis got preggers in H.S., etc.)
Don't get me wrong, they are nice people but I am relatively low maintenance and 'drama-free' compared to them, thus making me a winner to the family. Sorry. Please don't boot me. DH thinks I am a total Loser (won't tell you what he thinks of my family!) and I only clean the shower stall tracks if company is coming (but I have to wear gloves to do it by then!)
Am I forgiven??
I can relate. I, too, am the winner in my family. Which is a sad state of affairs, because I'm certainly in the Loser category.
My mother and father are seperated, but living in the same house, while my mother has an affair, and my father is clinically depressed because he wants my mother to be a "wife" again (especially in the bedroom). They are in financial turmoil because at one point they got behind on their bills, and refinanced. And then they were still behind on the bills, so they got a second mortgage. And then they had problems paying that, so they got an equity line of credit, and I'm basically waiting for them to call me and tell me they're homeless.
My brother who is 26 has never left home. He still lives with my parents. He actually got married, moved his wife in, and they've had three children since then.
My brother also went to a strip club, and fell in love with a stripper on his very first visit, proceeded to tell his wife that he wanted to see other people, and now his wife (who has moved out) is planning on taking the kids to Mexico to live with her mother while she remains here in the States, working to support them.
The three children live with my brother 6 days a week, yet he pays over $600 a month in child support.
One grandmother has a care giver that spends 8 hours a day with her. The care giver became good friends with my aunt. The care giver had money issues and needed help with heat for her home, and since my uncle works at an oil company, he helped her set up an account at his company so she could get oil on credit instead of having to pay for it upon delivery. Since my uncles name was also on this account (the only way the care giver could get credit), he got a phone call that there was hundreds of dollars past due, and they were going to hold him responsible since Ms.CareGiver wasn't paying. My aunt got mad and confronted Ms.CareGiver, and Ms.CareGiver in turn filed a report that my aunt was "coming on to her", and stuck her finger up Ms.CareGivers butt when Ms.CareGiver was bent over. Now my aunt has a restraining order on her, and isn't allowed in my grandmothers house so long as my grandmother wants to have a care giver provided by the state.
My other grandmother has a boyfriend that's probably 20 years younger than her that got both of them kicked out of the retirement community for selling weed. They now live in a trailer park, and her boyfriend has bought a new/used truck as a way to "settle down" since he won't have the money to throw parties every day, and he'll have a truck payment to make instead. I can only visualize my 80 year old grandmother partying with a pot head every night.
Then there's my husbands sister. I saw a redneck book in the bookstore (Foxworthy jokes with funny cartoon illustrations), and highlighted every redneck joke that pertained to her and her family, and mailed it to her anonymously. They must have gotten the hint, because a week later, they were all out in the yard, cleaning and cutting grass.
As if there aren't 20 teachers out there to make sure they get in the door!
When I take grandkids to school I do the same thing. I can't help it. Just so you know I did not do that with my children. See what happens when you get old. You get soft.
DH too.
Makes me want to suffocate him in his sleep, but I have to admit it DOES crack me up
. They have an interview with Mike Judge and alot of sound bites from the movie that can be used as ring tones if you have a USB cable for your phone
