The "I WANT TO ARGUE!" thread - JOKE THREAD!

[DuskKodesh]

I understand. I choose the wrong time to get bangs.

Would it make you guys feel better if I told you I am about four days growth from just shaving my entire head?

 

[disneychrista]

Would it make you guys feel better if I told you I am about four days growth from just shaving my entire head?

I'm just reminding myself to keep the scissors out of my hair. I still have to work so I can't just hide at home until any mess I make grows out.

 

[ronandannette]

I understand. I chose the wrong time to get bangs.

Hon, you can trim your bangs yourself - go ahead, I promise it will be alright. Me, I've got a precision cut that goes from this-to-this when it gets a 1/4" too long.

 

[2Lunds]

Got any tips? I'll be that desperate in a day or two. It's either that or ask my DH to give it a go. He's the only person I'm getting within 6' of these days.

How long is your hair? There are two YT channels that I've seen give good, pretty easy tutorials on cutting your own hair, but it had to be about shoulder length or longer to really reach the sections properly.

Brad Mondo:

Elle Bangs:

(this is an older one of hers)

(so is this one)

If your hair is shorter than this, then my best recommendation is just to follow the lines you already have and point cut just the very tips off. I used to cut my own pixie, and I would take small square sections, twist them, then use the razor to shave the tips off. That refreshes the layers and gives a nice shaggy look that hides lots of imperfections. You can to that to add some texture to a bob as well.

 

[chickapin parterre]

Appropriate or Inappropriate???? !!! I don't have cable and only have access to the four major networks, two sub networks and the best network in North America....Telemundo..and they are airing Noah...yikes...don't need that dark film.....so over on Fox,...March of the Penguins....takes place in the dark and most of the content is dark....so the argument is .....appropriate or inappropriate that we should be listening to Morgan Freeman and soundtrack of March of the Penguins, knowing his narration work with Tom Cruise?

 

[lucyanna girl]

My husband wants to express his (wrong) opinion about everything. Which is wrong because I'm right because I said so!

I wonder why he keeps watching all of those true crime shows where the husband murders his wife. Hummm

 

[JimMIA]

My husband wants to express his (wrong) opinion about everything. Which is wrong because I'm right because I said so!

I wonder why he keeps watching all of those true crime shows where the husband murders his wife. Hummm

OMG, you complain about everything!

It's TV. It's fiction. He's just bored.

Relax, but don't back down! Stand up for yourself! Call him out!

Now, if you see him sharpening a big butcher knife, that might be a good time to make a grocery run...

But I'm sure you have nothing to worry about. Probably.

 

[JimMIA]

Relax folks...it's a joke...

 

[monkeydawn]

My husband is always like "you know what sounds good?" and I'm like "what?" and he's like "a good margarita."..and then he promptly remembers I don't like tequila

Ya know, the first bottle of tequila we ever tried (Cuervo) we thought had gone bad. LOL It took a few years before we tried straight tequila again. Unless you've tried a really nice sipping tequila, preferably well paired with food, then you havent really tried it. Most places use swill in their Margaritas because all the sugar will "hide" the taste anyway. Well, unfortunately with a bad tequila its less likely to be pure and the additives are what will give you a headache/ hangover. This is why a lot of people dont like or think they cant handle tequila. But that's really kind of like saying Cold Duck is indicative of all Champagnes.

Our state only allows the import of about 100 different kinds of tequilas. Right off the top about half are impure and not worth drinking. Beyond that there can be pure ones that are still bad. There are maybe 30 that we could get that are acceptable to us, maybe 10 that are actually really good in our opinion and worth sipping. Anytime we travel we stop at out of state liquor stores to browse their selections. Luckily we had several road trips last fall and early winter and we were able to stock a nice variety. I inventoried before lock down and we had 14 unopened bottles. Wonder what we will have left by the end...

 

[LSUmiss]

People who hang their TP over the top have never owned a cat.

Not true! I just have always locked my cats out of the bathroom!

 

[Deb & Bill]

Yes, roughly 60 inches to 40 inches. But the thing about Miami is we only have two seasons -- wet and dry. We are currently in the dry season, which runs roughly from October to May, and it hasn't rained for at least a week.

Good news: the sprinklers are sprinkling.

And no...this is not the same as watching grass grow.

You get to run your sprinklers before midnight? On Marco, Even number addresses water Tues, Thur, Sun starting at midnight until 8AM. Odd number Mon, Wed, Sat No daylight sprinkler operation.

 

[JimMIA]

You get to run your sprinklers before midnight? On Marco, Even number addresses water Tues, Thur, Sun starting at midnight until 8AM. Odd number Mon, Wed, Sat No daylight sprinkler operation.

I live in Miami. Nobody's telling me when to sprinkle my lawn -- because I am special, and exempt from all rules!

 

[Deb & Bill]

Sprinkles on donuts are WRONG!! Why ruin a nice soft bite of heaven with some hard and waxy pieces of disgustingness.

Sprinkles on anything are wrong.

 

[Deb & Bill]

It is still NOT okay for the clothing store on Main Street to be open when every other one is closed. I see it every day. It is across the street from my “essential” job. I hope NO ONE is going in. Why the cops/enforcement haven’t closed them down is shocking to me.

Are they selling scrubs? Those would be essential.

 

[disneychrista]

Are they selling scrubs? Those would be essential.

No. They sell wranglers, carhart and similar. Not any more essential then my need for business dress clothing.

 

[chickapin parterre]

Sprinkles on anything are wrong.

Jimmies is the most popular term for sprinkles in the Philadelphia and Boston regions.[9] The origin of the name "jimmies" is uncertain, but it was first documented in 1930, as a topping for cake.[10]

Though the Just Born Candy Company of Bethlehem, PA claims to have invented jimmies and named them after an employee,[11] this is unlikely.[12][13] The rumor that the name somehow refers to Jim Crow is also likely false.[2][12][14]

Another unlikely claim on the name "jimmies" originates from Dr. Sidney Farber and Edward Brigham. Dr. Farber co-founded the Dana–Farber Cancer Institute in Boston, Massachusetts as well as a charity named after one of his child patients, The Jimmy Fund. Edward Brigham opened an ice cream restaurant called Brigham’s and charged an extra penny for chocolate sprinkles on a cone, which benefited The Jimmy Fund. The fund however was started in 1948, well after the first historical reference.[14]

 

[easyas123]

In South Jersey, where I grew up, you had two choices: rainbow jimmies or chocolate jimmies.

 

[Pucks104]

You have a point. I guess the proverbially "pick your battles" came into play. It's a minor annoyance for sure, it is lazy, but I opted to focus on much larger issues way back in the day.

I'd say my husband's "pick your battles" moment with me that probably most likens the toilet paper thing is I'm constantly losing the remotes. I'm terrible at that. I set it down and I'll lose it, it'll fall between the cushions, get lost somewhere on the blanket I'm using especially the fire tv stick remote (it's so dang tiny!) I'm bringing it into other rooms and can't find it again, etc. He gave up years ago trying to get me to remember to place it in a very visible spot every single time. So ya know.

Attach a TILE to the remote. It will save a ton of searching time!

 

[JimMIA]

I wish there was one giant blended thread and let the people fight until the horse is dead on it instead the start rinse and repeat over and over.

No offense "love," but YOU are WRONG.

There is such a thread, and even if the horse is already dead, we can still beat it.

Enjoy!

P.S. Hopefully, you realize this is all in jest!

 

[Carol_]

The metric system is far superior to imperial measurements.

Also, why do we drive on a parkway, but park on a driveway?

Grapenuts contain neither grapes nor nuts. (also, they taste terrible)

Something, something about reclining seats on an airplane

Also, if I *really* want to argue.. I'll go into our bathrooms, and put the toilet seats up.

*Rolling up my sleeves and putting up my dukes*
Grape Nuts are delicious and keep things moving!