The happyhaunts go South... the endless trip report!

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Part 33

Day 6, Dec 16: As mentioned in my JBJ Aside... today will be strictly Disney. All Disney. All the time. I promise. I think. The happyhaunts had a wildly funny time at the '50's Primetime Cafe. Actually... you SHOULD really check this one out in the dining review so you know what the heck I'm talkin' about. This morning DH was a grumpy, tired, quiet DH. But... after lunch DH was a bouncy, happy, energized DH. It was because both Calvin and our Cousin Carlos waiter got me but GOOD. And made me sit on a chair for a "nose pickin' potty mouth" timeout. AND... made me BLUSH with embarassment. So DH couldn't have been HAPPIER. Well, maybe if I actually got spanked as well. But we won't go there. DH is a happy man. Now. After lunch. In fact, now that I think about it, every other happyhaunt was a HAPPIERhaunt. Than before lunch. Geez. What does THAT say? You know what it says to me. It says: I WIN. A lot. Probably most of the time. When we all play. Thus, my loving family was SO pleased to see me go down. So sweet. Now, the REALLY happyhaunts move quickly through the Studios straight for The Voyage of the Little Mermaid. I think DH was in the lead. DH likes the Little Mermaid show. It's good. Very thin plot, though. We push our way through the crowd in the waiting area in a slow, polite and considerate manner(ie. We pretend to have to "catch" Tommy who we're actually chasing to the spot we want) To get to the wall so that we can have front row seats when the doors open for the theatre. A thinly disguised ploy which often works. You should try it. We get the first five seats in the front row. Because we're NOT RUDE enough to sit in the middle. We follow the CMs orders and "move all the way down the row to the very end". Unlike some people. At Disney. It really bugs me. And makes me want DH to step on their toes while squeezing by. 'Cause he's heavier than I am. Sheesh. Those rude people! Ha. Everyone enjoys this brief little dose of Ariel. It's SO brief, though, it is hard to follow. Unless you've seen the movie and know the story. Which we all have. Except Tommy. It used to be one of Beth's favourites a long time ago. And we haven't watched it in ages. So, as I was watching Tommy watch The Voyage of the Little Mermaid, I realize that he doesn't have a CLUE what's going on. He actually looked a tad distressed. And THEN Ursula showed up. Let's just say it wasn't his favourite Disney moment. We hustle out of the show when it ends. And go directly to Playhouse Disney Live on Stage. To appease him. It worked. Like a charm. Like magic. Like a magical charm. Ok. I'll stop. But it made him very happy. And me, too, at the same time. For two very different reasons. The first being that he LOVED it. And laughed and sang and boogied away. The second being that DH made ME laugh. The whole time. Because you have to sit down on the floor for the whole shebang. And DH is not much of a floor-sitter. He's big. He's wide. He can't cross his legs for long. He couldn't get comfy. His knees hurt. He wiggled. He squirmed. And jabbed people by accident. And... FINALLY... FINALLY... found a position which suited him. And he was comfortable. It was a position we had just witnessed, moments before, during the Voyage of the Little Mermaid. It was the same position that Ariel sits in on the rock. Legs to the side. Knees gently bent. Leaning back, slightly, on his arm. Really, all he needed to do was a toe-point and I was gonna wet my pants.(WMP) DH is a big, strong, feminine, mermaid-sitter of a DH. MMMWAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! And... he didn't know what I was finding so amusing, either. He thought I was being an idiot. That I found the show as funny as Tommy did. 'Cause he looked at me and said, "What is your problem Mel? Are you five years old?" Ha, ha, ha. It was fun. And then it was over. Too soon. For me. And for Beth who was getting a huge kick out of watching Tommy enjoy himself, too. She's a great sister. Calvin was bored out of his skull. A little aside here. Yes... I lied. Beth is WONDERFUL with Tommy. She really steps up to the plate and takes care of her littlest brother. LOVES him! In fact, Beth is aka "The Cyborg Fairy". Shhhhh. Don't tell Tommy. We have this Hot Wheels track called The Cyborg. Most of the pieces are missing by now. But Tommy loves the Cyborg's Skull. And the green goo that's hanging out of its mouth. He drags it around with him and talks to it. Yes. The terrifying, goo-dripping, car-eating, skeletal Cyborg head. For $49.99. He's afraid of spiders and the dark... but lives for that Cyborg head. So... Beth has now become "The Cyborg Fairy" at home. And leaves him little notes and gifts from "The Cyborg Fairy" in the mornings. Beth is our wonderful, sweet, gentle Cyborg Fairy. Love that girl! Aside, over. Onwards. So we leave Playhouse Disney and head through the park to another favourite: The Muppet Vision 3D. Where something AWFUL happens. I stand in puke. Stranger's puke. Huge, chunky pile of it. Not on purpose. I didn't see it in the waiting area. And I, being the terrific smeller I am, missed THAT completely. But Calvin didn't. Because he said, "Wow. Something smells like choke.", and then screamed, "EWWWW! Mommy's STANDING in CHOKE!" And so I was. The happyhaunts scattered faster than greased lightening. Except for me. I was frozen to the puke-spot in horror. After a second I gathered my wits and gingerly high-stepped out of it. And walked outside to clean off my boots. Scrape. Scrape. Scrape. On a curb. And a flower pot. Someone's Disney stroller wheel. Yada. Headed back in. With good news for the family. Yep. There was NONE on my jean cuffs. Pleased about that. We head into the show and manage to get MORE grossed out. As someone sitting beside us has a fully loaded baby. Stinky, smelly diaper. By now, DH is so grossed out he's mouth-breathing. Throughout the whole show. It couldn't have ended soon enough for us. And, now, I am ending this. For today. Bye.

To be continued.

 

[DisneyGirl4188]

I have to say this is one of the BEST trip reports I have read. I love that you go into such detail. I hate when I am reading a really great report and then it ends. I look forward to going to work and reading this.

You should know though that I may get fired because between you, ZZUB, and VetteChick I don't get any work done. Oh well, it's worth it!

 

[amburger]

Oh wow. I finally got through reading all of that. lol. I kept trying to catch up as you kept posting new reports. lol. But now I'm caught up. Yay. Anyways, love your writing style. I am just loving reading this trip report. I love your sense of humor. So fun.

 

[Joann]

We went onstage at the Detroit Show. If they are going into the 'fan pit' they will be up there for 5 or 6 songs not just 1! It was a fantastic time, one of the girls we went with actually got kissed by Jon! Not to be gross or anything (but where better than within happyhaunts trip report ) but we are talking tongue and all. She about fainted! The previous night she saw them and was in the 'fan pit', she pee'd her pants when he stroked her arm!

Have a nice day Mel! Tell Jon the DIS says "HI".

Ya they were on stage for a few songs... she said it was great that hes so cute upclose!!!

 

[fizz13]

Wow, well after 48 hours I made it through the report. No I'm not a 1st grade reader or anything, it's that I have 3 great kids like you do .

Firstly, happy Birthday to beth for a couple of weeks ago. My DS turned 2 on the same day and I think Friday the 13th is a great day for a birthday. Secondly, I have tickets for Bon Jovi too but I have to wait till July for them to make it over to London Very jealous right now and glad you had a good time with my favourite, hottest-looking geek.

Loving the report like crazy and like many others, am laughing out loud. There seems to be a lot of love with the Happyhaunts, long may it continue keep up the great writing and I'll check in soon,

Claire xx

 

[AshClan]

This report is fantastic!!!! Definitely right up there (perhaps, surpassing, yes, surpassing!) Delswife. You are a great writer, Mel! Special thanks to ZZUB for leading me in your direction (another great writer!).

Thanks for the detail, the laughs, and the mushy stuff, too. Sounds like you have a great family! Keep 'em comin!!!

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Part 34(ha,ha. This is NEVER gonna end)

Day 6, Dec 16: After finishing with our Muppet Smell 'O' Vision 3D experience we headed to Star Tours. Even though what we all really wanted was a long hot shower. And new boots. For me. Star Tours is the official Disney Studios Geek-Magnet Ride. Which we love. We are the space geek, geek-seeking happyhaunts. It's all good. On this ride. Even Beth likes this one. It took an eon to get her on it for the first time. And the promise of a souvenier, afterwards, in the dump shop they call "Tatoonie Traders". So now that she's actually done it... she loves it. But not as much as Calvin and DH. They are both hip-deep in their Star Wars lovin' mode here. And, truth be told(but not to DH or Calvin, please), this ride is a little past its prime. They should redo it. Ramp it up a little. It needs more juice. Because it's getting a little long in the tooth. In the same way The Great Movie Ride is. And Pam Anderson. 'Cause SHE'S looking less like a blond bombshell and more like a bleached-out female impersonator these days. Don't ya think? I do. And... Star Tours is starting to seem like a "good ride" impersonator, itself. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD... fix up Star Tours! 'Cause it will ALWAYS have draw. There. That's my message. To the Mouse. So... we do Star Tours and exit into the wallet-emptying Tatoonie Traders. Did I mention that these dump shops are Disney's greatest idea? Ever. I think maybe I might have. 'Cause I, personally, got stuck in this one for more than an hour last May during Star Wars Weekend... and the release of some godforsaken limited edition pin thingie. I was in line. Over an hour. Cheek to jowl with Steve. Who is the world's biggest Star Wars Fanatic Geek I have ever had the pleasure of chatting with. For a hour. Very tightly squeezed together. In line. He talked the WHOLE time. My gosh. The guy could NOT shut up. I could barely get a word in myself. I hate that. And he must have dropped at least $1000 on limited edition collector items. While I waited, ever so patiently, to purchase one blue lightsaber. For Tommy. Steve was a well-dressed, rich, talky Star Wars geek. I've missed him. But... the BEST... THE BEST thing he said was that he does a "Star Wars Christmas Tree" every year at home. Too funny. He buys and makes little ornaments out of little Star Wars toys. To string up on his tree. Bless him. Whew. After our tour of Tatoonie Traders and a little begging and wailing by Calvin... we joined the masses of people piling into the Lights, Motor, Action! Extreme Stunt Show. Again... I have a suggestion for the Mouse: Fix the blasted entry set-up for this show!!!!! Please! It's a nightmare. First you walk seven miles around the whole stadium to the very back. In the blazing sun. Then everyone gets filtered down in to a tiny double row so they can climb up the stairs to the bleachers. I swear we spent more time, en masse, plodding up those stairs in a line than we actually spent WATCHING this 45 minute show. FIX IT! Somehow. I say. But, all in all, the Lights, Motor, Action! Extreme Stunt Show is pretty darn good. It's fast. It's loud. And the stunts are very good. The boys loved it. And I'm not gonna say much more about it 'cause I don't want to be a spoiler. Go see it. It drags, though, in the places where they're setting up for the stunts. Its transitions are very slow. And the jokes are kinda bad. But... THE BEST PART is when the guy catches on FIRE!!!! (oops...spoiler!) Wow! I LOVED that part. So did Calvin. Which lead us to a long discussion explaining how they SAFELY managed that stunt. Which then led to me hiding all our lighters and matches when we returned home from WDW. Not that I feared for Calvin. Mostly for Tommy. Who is Calvin's stunt double.

To be continued...

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Part 35

Day 6, Dec 16: After our fire safety lecture, we had a little salty snack and walked back up Star Tours way. So that DH and Calvin could do it one more time. And so that Tatoonie Traders could once more cast its spell on our middle son. And we could say "No."... and he could cry. Again. 'Cause he really, really, REALLY wants a Chewbacca gun. Truly. ONLY thing he wants. Now. At this point on the trip. But... MAN... can he put up a fight when he wants to! The Force is Strong in that one. And DH and I have the whole "gun" debate to sort out first. 'Cause DH likes guns. Me, not so much. However. I took a hunting licensing course with DH and about twenty other young, red-blooded Canadian males when I was 24. The only female. ONE. Female. Who SHOWED them all a thing about target shooting. If I do say so myself. Highest score. I can KILL some targets... but I don't really want to hurt anything fluffy or feathery. It was funny. Because after I WON, DH had to pretend not to be my DB. For fear of reprisals. Hee, hee. Not that I'm the greatest shot or anything. But these were all Toronto boys. City slickers. Probably hadn't ever fired a gun. I'm from the country, myself. One stoplight. No McDonalds. A father who took me hunting and liked guns. This aside is now over. So... we tell Calvin to buck up and realize that the Osborne Light Show is about to begin. We head over to the start of the display. The beginning of the street. Wow! It's BRIGHT. Five million Christmas lights. At least. But, the people are PACKED into the street, looking up, tighter than Jon Bon Jovi was packed into his black pants at the concert. At least THAT was somewhat pleasing. To me. Now begins the tale of Mel (me) happyhaunt instantly losing the rest of the happyhaunt clan. Because I was taking pictures of all the Osborne lights overhead and up on all the buildings. Plenty of pictures. Of which... NONE turned out. Zip. Zero. Nada. Why? Because I am a cheap moron. I decided to use up all the disposable cameras for this spectacle. Why? Because I didn't want the kids to WASTE the pictures and have them NOT turn out. So I used them. In the dark. To take pictures of lights. Because they are such high quality cameras. Pathetic. And... to top it all off, during this whole waste of time, money and energy, I tripped twice and landed down on my butt once. Hello, I'm Spazzy McGee. Oops. That's already taken. Hello, I'm Spazzy Molloy. Nice to meet ya. I tripped over the largest woman I have ever seen in my life. Upright, I mean. Not riding a ECV. Therefore, she remained upright and I bought the farm. Principle of inertia. I think. But, it WAS my fault. Guess what? I FOUND the BLACK CAT on the sidestreet, though. (oops... another spoiler) But not really, 'cause they hide it in a new place within the decorations every year. Fun game, that. But... I SAW it and took a cat-worth of pictures of it. And... I WIN! Oops, force of habit because... I LOSE! It was a challenge between DH and I to be the first to find it and the last thing I saw before he disappeared in the crush of people was his hand way up in the air pointing towards the cat... and then making the "I'm NUMBER ONE!" sign. Good one, DH! Love that man. I slide down the edge of the crowd taking more and more pictures and finally end up at the very end of the street. Alone. Finally, I see DH and the rest of the unhappyhaunts. DH looked a little bummed. He said he spent more time trying to find me than looking at the lights. Silly DH. I KNOW where our hotel room is! And they can easily find me if they really want to. Just follow your nose. To my boots.

To be continued.

 

[chirurgeon]

I want to thank you for a great trip report and a great dining review. They have been so fun to read. I'll be sorry to see the last of them. But until then, keep up the excellent work.

Kim

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Part 36

Day 6, Dec 16: After the Osborne Lights, we had made an ADR for the Hollywood Brown Derby Restaurant. It was going to be our first time to this dining establishment. But since we had spent the day as the Commando happyhaunts, the kids were baked. Just looking at them I could tell they weren't up for dinner in a really "nice" venue. The backfire potential was high. I had visions of Calvin annoying Beth. And of Calvin annoying Tommy. And of Calvin annoying Mel(both)... ! 'Cause when Calvin gets tired... Calvin gets annoying. Straight up. So, a better choice was to head back to the BCV and find something easy to eat along the way. Like a hotdog, even. Before we head out of the Studios, though, DH decides to take Calvin and Tommy to do The Tower of Terror ONE MORE TIME! Love that terror tower. I look at Beth. She looks tired. And sad. She doesn't really want to spend the next 30 minutes standing in the ToT dump shop looking through the pin collection again. I tell the boys to go and then tell Beth that we'll go shopping instead. "Ya... sure... ok." she sighs, "Which store?" I look at her, "THE CANDY STORE!" Yahooo! I know how to make my girl happy. Yes, I do. So we head over to the candy store on the corner of Sunset Blvd. The one attached to my FAVOURITE store.... The Disney Villains Shop. 'Cause I want a quick looky thru there, too. We walk in and it's a smeller's delight! It smells delish: like a weight gain of three to five pounds... upon entry. And it is nice and warm, too. But CROWDED. Very. Big line to order and pay. It gives us a chance to really look around while we wait. Watch them make some candy, look at the cookies and all the different kinds of fudge. It's the first time on any Disney trip that I've really spent in a candy store. And I realize something. This is the land of BIG TREATS. Everything was supersized. From the Marshmellow Sticks to the cookies. Holy cow. I felt just like Gilligan. Of the Island. Not Anne. Different island. It made me think of an episode of Gilligan's Island. THAT doesn't come to mind too often these days, huh? Well... I may be a Jon Bon Jovi Eighties Lady... but I'm a true Seventies Kid. 'Cause everyone loves the Seventies. Now. Right? Dodgy movies like The Towering Inferno and the CLASSIC Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. Tell me: How can such a GREAT album have led to, possibly, the WORST movie in the history of MANKIND? Peter Frampton! The Bee Gees! Ha, ha, ha! Well, kiss my grits! And the music of the Seventies! The music! Was GREAT! Who can live the rest of their lives without these tunes: Rhiannon, Free Bird, Thunder Road, Layla, American Pie, Imagine, Sweet Emotion... etc? NOT I! No. Not I. Not to mention the whole entire soundtrack from Grease. And Saturday Night Fever. ("Hey, watch the hair!"). The seventies DID rock. And I was an Adidas shorts and sneaker wearing girl with a light blue baby shirt that had "MEL" across the back in fuzzy mall press-on letters. (OHHH, crap! Did those big iron press machines ever make a GOOD smell!) Or else I was wearing a ****tube. Remember "****tubes". Everyone had one. I had a white ****tube...no ****s, though. Anyway, I was a cool seventies kid startin' my day off with Frankenberry Cereal, chewin' Big Red Gum, eatin' Dip Stix with my fingers and ridin' around town on my banana seat bike. I rocked the seventies. Miss them. Whew! DONE. I need a drink. Maybe a white wine spritzer? Where the he** was I going with all this? I'm lost. Oh, yeah. Gilligan. Gilligan's Island. It's not even a '70's show. Ha, ha, ha. That's funny. To me. But, I watched it in the seventies, in reruns, so it really IS. Anywho... on one episode they grown these really BIG fruits and veggies. It was neat... at first. Then just plain gross. That's EXACTLY how the big oversized candy treats in the store made me feel. It first struck me as "WOW. YUM" but I quickly moved on to "TOO BIG... WAY TOO BIG!" Plus, the CM who worked the line was handing out samples of fudge the whole time. And there were three ladies in front of us who were clearly one of her friends and her sisters. So EVERYBODY got to try plenty of fudge. I mean, she couldn't just let her friends try and nobody else, right? I even tried the pumpkin pie fudge. BLEECH! And the cookies and cream. And just about every other kind going. There's just NO reason for candy to be served up that big, though. It's decadent. But, it's Disney, too. So maybe that's the point. Or else it is to charge $8.00 for three marshmellows on a stick. It's beyond me. We end up buying a cat-worth of fudge for Beth. BLEECH! She was happy. But if I never eat another piece of fudge again in my life, I will die a happy woman. Well... gotta go. Catchya on the FLIP-SIDE 'cause I am Audi 5000! G'night Johnboy.

To be continued.

 

[javamom]

Part 36

Who can live the rest of their lives without these tunes: Rhiannon, Free Bird, Thunder Road, Layla, American Pie, Imagine, Sweet Emotion... etc? NOT I! No. Not I. Not to mention the whole entire soundtrack from Grease. And Saturday Night Fever. ("Hey, watch the hair!"). The seventies DID rock. And I was an Adidas shorts and sneaker wearing girl with a light blue baby shirt that had "MEL" across the back in fuzzy mall press-on letters. (OHHH, crap! Did those big iron press machines ever make a GOOD smell!) Or else I was wearing a ****tube. Remember "****tubes". Everyone had one. I had a white ****tube...no ****s, though. Anyway, I was a cool seventies kid startin' my day off with Frankenberry Cereal, chewin' Big Red Gum, eatin' Dip Stix with my fingers and ridin' around town on my banana seat bike. I rocked the seventies.
To be continued.

Who remembers Zotz candies? Anyone? Oh yeah, and carrying a wide-toothed comb in your back pocket... everywhere? Who else on here is a first-generation Sesame Street kid?

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Who remembers Zotz candies? Anyone? Oh yeah, and carrying a wide-toothed comb in your back pocket... everywhere? Who else on here is a first-generation Sesame Street kid?

Ohmigod! ZOTZ!!!!! Too funny! They came by the string, right? And were hard with a zippy centre! And kinda disgusting... but in a GOOD junky way. Thank you, coffee and/or software lady! You must have rocked the seventies, too!

 

[TEXASPRINCESSES]

Don't remember the candy but definitely a first generations esame street kid and Mr. rogers too.."land of make -believe--coming right up"!!!!!

ohhh..just had a birthday this week--I feel soooo old--thank god this year wasn't the big 40--hopefully the next 360 days will go REEEAAAALLLL sloooooooowwww!

 

[pairofaces889]

Great trip report. I've been lurking for awhile and finally decided to sign up so I could thank you and all the other Diser's who share their trips with all of us.

 

[VanniGirl]

Don't remember the candy - but I am a 1st gen Sesame Street

 

[javamom]

Ohmigod! ZOTZ!!!!! Too funny! They came by the string, right? And were hard with a zippy centre! And kinda disgusting... but in a GOOD junky way. Thank you, coffee and/or software lady! You must have rocked the seventies, too!

Yes, those are Zotz. STILL my all-time favorite candy, although I haven't seen any in ages. And it is coffee lady, I am addicted. However, I am also somewhat of a computer geek, so really either could apply.

Buy stock in Starbucks (I mean it) DH and I are addicts. Also, if I ever get up North, I will make it a point to try out Tim Hortons.

 

[tiki23]

I loved Zotz! (They beat the heck out of Pop Rocks) And I drank a lot of Tab. And Fresca. Loved Jethro Tull and The Eagles. And I loved my feathered hair - ala Farrah.

And I'm loving your trip report. Thanks!

 

[sskem96]

I love slow nights at work! I can't believe I finally caught up to the end of the thread! Great report! Can't wait for more!

 

[Rachael Q]

I printed to read on the train to work. Except I laughed so much, the lady sitting opposite me moved!

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Hey there people of the Dis. It's Mel. I'm not quite sure when I'll get a chance to post the next Part. We had a little bit of "excitement" here at the happyhaunt abode this weekend. Major flooding and water damage on all three floors. There are hordes of contractors here as I type. Ripping out walls, ceilings, crown moldings, carpets and floors. Lot's of water. Here. Lots. Amazed our cat didn't drown. Why? You ask. One word. CALVIN. 'nuff said. It's gonna be busy around here for a little bit. I'll try to write the next part as soon as I can, tho. Wish us luck.