The debate board.. please read

[minniepumpernickel]

Originally posted by Teris
Faith, I am no stranger to messageboards. I have been around them for about 8 years, and have admined on several, before getting fed up with this very type of thing. People end up feeling an emotional connection, and a sense of ownership of something that really isn't in their control. When a step is made that they don't agree with, it becomes very combative. Been there and done that over again. I think life is too short. It's only a message board. I understand the frustration in having the DB suddenly close. I have found myself even clicking on it out of habit.

The point is, the nastiness I refer to that has been happening in the past 24 hours, has shown a sense of intolerance on both sides.

If you read the threads all in regards to the DB closing,, there have been some unwarrented comments directed at the general type of person who tends to post on the CB, not individuals. Just the type of person. Faceless,, and nameless, and the implication that they are brainless because they didnt' participate in the DB.

Be angry if you want to over the closing of a board, but to insult people because they 'need' a little pixie dust, or 'prayers' is really uncalled for. I think the people who have been doing this really should be ashamed of themselves, as at some point in their lives, I am sure they will be wanting others to be supportive of them if they are having a bad time of things.

I think that there is room for people who don't wish to debate to exist here, as well as those who feel lost if they don't get their daily dose of debating. It's the show of intolerance on both sides that there shouldn't be room for.

Yes, but if you read the prayers and good wishes, and illness stuff it gets so depressing all of the time. We used to just have a board for prayers and pd.

You hardly have any posts here, so it must be hard to get the full picture of what has gone on here over the years! It might not be like the other boards you've been to.

 

[jrydberg]

Be angry if you want to over the closing of a board, but to insult people because they 'need' a little pixie dust, or 'prayers' is really uncalled for.

Agreed. At the same time, insulting people because they enjoy a bit of hearty debate is equally uncalled for.

It's the show of intolerance on both sides that there shouldn't be room for.

That's really the problem right there. Let's not add to it. Thanks for your clarification Teris.

 

[richiebaseball]

Originally posted by faithinkarma
Teris, you are right when you say there was bullying and natiness on the DB. But I do not see how that is relevant to the point I am trying to make. That point being that somehow criticism of people from the DB has suddenly become the pc thing to do.

That seems to be very true. Then again it wasn't that uncommon for CBers to be attacked and criticized when they ventured over to the DB. For every CBer that contends all or most DBers are nasty name-callers there is a DBer that contends CBers are somehow less intelligent. I guess it just depends on which side of the fence you're standing on.

Just one man's opinion.

Richard

Edited to add: And if I had read all the posts before I replied to one, I would have seen that Teris basically said this same thing. Thanks for looking anyway.

 

[Teris]

Minnie, I was a daily lurker here about a year or so before I registered, and I have only started posting recently. Hopefully I can feel welcome to stick around. Will have to see what happens.

Faith,, I do see what you are saying,, but the reverse is also true in regards to the way the people who make the CB their 'home'. I think a good majority of those people have posted that they have no problem with debates going on in here.

You are right that if people don't want to read something, they should move along, and find something else that interests them.

But you also have to admit, that for those who want to post what some may consider 'depressing' pleas for pixie dust should be allowed to do so, without being belittled for it.

To each their own. What a dull world it would be, if everyone thought the same way.

I hope the debates continue, the bullying is reduced, and everyone finds their bliss.

 

[faithinkarma]

agreed

 

[Teris]

I agree too

I guess my empathizing with both sides didn't come across very well, but I do feel for both sides.

niteeee

 

[kazzie]

I think it's very regretful that a handful of users of the DB have gotten the board closed down

The vast and overwealming majority who used the board in a lively,supportive way must be feeling bereft at the moment.

Speaking as someone who critized the moderating of the DB I wouldn't have wanted to have seen it closed down.I only asked why there wasn't stronger moderating of the board or even a prescence of someone slapping wrists or keeping things clean.

I would feel lost if I lost the boards I spend so much time on and can understand the people asking why weren't we given a warning,like shape up or ship out,or if these personal attacks continue we will close the board down for good

 

[DSNY FN]

Good post Kazzie and we have asked why there was nothing like that done and we really didn't get an answer from the Wm's that I really saw anyhow. Not sure if others saw it I have not been on here for all the replies etc so I am hoping someone can clarify that one.

 

[MeanLaureen]

I think it's pretty funny that the CBers think the DBers were nasty when at the same time you have a user named MeanLauren.

Hey now John, I might be mean but I'm only mean when a person deserves it... well that or when it's funny - I can't help it. Now don't make me come over there and show you how mean I can be!! Oh yeah, and get it right - it's MeanLaureEn - two e's .. it rhymes

Next - good grief people! The world has not stopped revolving, it was just a message board - repeat after me.. it was just a message board.

Tell me something, do you guys hit the ceiling when a network cancels a TV show you watched too?

As far as wanting a warning that it was going to close - why? Were you guys going to get together and hug or something? Sit around a campfire and sing Cumbaya??

And you know what? You can still have a debate here - big difference is that nastiness and name calling WILL NOT be tolerated on the CB.

Be an adult and have debates on the facts and how you interpret them and if people don't agree with you, don't use insults and derogatory names as a comeback. Not very good debating skills if you ask me. Think you will see debating skills like that at this years Presidential debates?

I can see it now:

"Oh yeah Mr. President? Well your momma wears combat shoes and your butt stinks and I'm always right."

" You think so Mr. Kerry, well you suck and no matter what you say you are an idiot and I'm always right."

Although I have to say I might tend to tune in for that debate.

Who knows, if debates can be held respectfully (instead of I'm right and if you don't agree with me you are an idiot), maybe more people that didn't frequent the debate board might be inclined to join in and add more insight to the subjects.

 

[Lewski709]

Originally posted by MeanLaureen
Next - good grief people! The world has not stopped revolving, it was just a message board - repeat after me.. it was just a message board.

Tell me something, do you guys hit the ceiling when a network cancels a TV show you watched too?

As far as wanting a warning that it was going to close - why? Were you guys going to get together and hug or something? Sit around a campfire and sing Cumbaya??

And you know what? You can still have a debate here - big difference is that nastiness and name calling WILL NOT be tolerated on the CB.

Be an adult and have debates on the facts and how you interpret them and if people don't agree with you, don't use insults and derogatory names as a comeback. Not very good debating skills if you ask me.

Nicely put MeanLaureen!
The DB seemed to make people feel like this

GULP!
Cumbayah!

 

[Lanshark]

I can see it now:

"Oh yeah Mr. President? Well your momma wears combat shoes and your butt stinks and I'm always right."

" You think so Mr. Kerry, well you suck and no matter what you say you are an idiot and I'm always right."

You have been lurking on the DB, haven't you?

 

[sha_lyn]

faithinkara... here is a quote from the post I was refering too

it is on the first page of that thread

Someone learned a lot about religion on the DB? Ummmmmmmmm...unless people over there have a degree in theology, I wouldn't go looking at the DB to learn about religion

My sincere apologies. And I appreciate you taking the time to set me straight. Who knows what opinions I might have mistakenly formed about you? Well, no one would know, since I cannot express them any more

LOL... yep we better be careful about forming opinions that aren't made out of pixie dust LOL... It is a joke folks.. yes DB'ers can joke


Oh and love what you said here...

We had a "home". A place where we knew each other and laughed and fought. And yes, it was getting way out of hand. But none of us made the decision to leave on our own. It was made for us. And if you cannot understand how that would make us gravitate to the next closest room to commiserate and even mourn, then may it never happen to you.

I think you summed up very well what I am feeling.

 

[treesinger]

For the WM's: It's your site, run it how you like. As I've said many times on the debate board, private businesses should be allowed to do anything with their business that is not directly harmful to anyone. Removing the DB is not harmful. It is inconvenient. We'll live. We just don't like inconvenience.

As far as the community aspect goes, I'll bet that most DB'ers will agree that the DB was our CB. It is where we wrestled with the issues of the day, learned a little and, YES, even got to know each other a little better. We didn't discuss the pets, kids etc. much because that is not what many wanted. I enjoy debating for the sake of debating. I've never been mean or nasty (have I DB'ers or am I delusional?). I applied to be a DB moderator a couple months ago and was not accepted. One reason was I didn't see any action taken that was easily visible. It seemed that the nasty mudslinging that did happen was kinda allowed to happen because it was the DB, whereas on another board (CB, Planning, etc.) I think it might have been reigned in more quickly. I, for one, am for crushing the ignorance of people who can't express themselves without attacking people. Alas, I'll never be able to prove that I can do the job.

A message to CB'ers: DB'ers are people just like you, only we prefer to talk more about the issues of the day rather than the intracacies of our lives. Some of us get out of hand the same way that some of you get out of hand with each other. We shake hands and make up the same way you do. And a few DB'ers could have been reigned in a bit to curb the personal attacks, because that crap doesn't fly on any boards anywhere IMO. And stop with the "DB'ers cause trouble" type of comments. By making that very comment, you "lower" yourself to the very bevavior you criticise. Check the subject line. If it says "debate", move along. DB'ers didn't come here looking to crowd your space so stop treating us like the red headed stepchild.

A message to DB'ers: We're allowed to debate on the CB. So just put DB in the subject line and be done with it. Follow the guidelines and curb the personal attacks. And stop with the whole "CB is fluff" thing. We're a FAMILY here. And making comments like that only goes to prove what some CB'ers already think, that we're spoiling for a fight and will pick one wherever we can. We know that's not true and by NOT namecalling, we can prove it to them.

To both sides: First of all, we're all on the same side here, we just have to share a room now. I get the bottom bunk, thank you very much! Has anyone noticed that there have been a few comments from BOTH sides attacking the other side as being too tough/nice? Does anyone here think that any of these types of statements solve anything?

Lastly, because know SOMEONE is thinking it:
Don't anyone try to accuse me of being an armchair moderator. I don't think any one person need be a moderator to ask that people be civil to each other and refrain from personal attacks. Besides, the mods would likely be pleasantly pleased to see us police ourselves so that they can devote more time to running the site rather than putting out whatever fire started on the boards.

I will be around on both the CB and the DB posts and hope that we'll all visit each other and above all RESPECT each other. And for those that have only visited the DB or CB, now might just be the time to gather a few new friendships from the boards we never visited. I hope to make some and I hope all y'all others find some.

 

[Robinrs]

Lastly, because know SOMEONE is thinking iton't anyone try to accuse me of being an armchair moderator.

 

[treesinger]

Originally posted by Robinrs

Robin, I just can't help myself...

Are you agreeing with my sentiment, agreeing that I AM an armchair moderator, or agreeing that people are going to accuse me of it anyway?

 

[wdwdvcdad]

I think people got confused about the notion of attacking an idea rather than attacking a person.

First, some people thought than when their silly ideas are attacked, they were being personally attacked. They then responded personally, rather than dealing with the idea at hand.

Second, there were some mental_midgets who could not debate ideas, and were, therefore, only attacking individuals.

Those 2 types ae the people who should have been banned.

 

[Dan Murphy]

Jason--King of Common Sense....some very well thought out, common sense thoughts there, Jason, well stated, IMO.

 

[Disney Dee]

I have to say to those who think they could have moderated the DB better that just last week I gave out more then 1 warning about closing a thread why do we need to give a warning about closing a board? I also locked afew and deleted afew posts and threads. One day I had 12 reported posts when I got home from work! How many "PLAY NICE" warnings did we have to make???? So the moderating was not non exsistant as some of you think. You all knew the rules.......... There was just to many who constantly broke the already relaxed guidelines over and over again.

I will miss moderating the DB, aside from the problems it constantly had, I enjoyed reading the "real" debates. Now its gone, we will all get over it, as bad as it was getting this past yr or so, I can understand the reasons the webmasters decided to close it.

 

[Kitty 34]

Nicely said, Jason.

 

[RNMOM]

Way to go, Jason!

Just like to add...we are here because several people have worked very hard to establish this site. It belongs to them and they allow us to come over to play. For that I am thankful.