I would be willing to follow this thread anywhere.
I thought long and hard about posting this but here goes.
***************If you do not want to bring up a lot of bad memories in your own life then do not read any further.
I had wanted to tell everyone that my wish for the new year was that everyone would have a safe year, filled with rich memories, good times, and be able to get over the occasional bump in the road new year.
But I also know that there are some of us that are having trouble with holidays because someone we have loved dearly has left this world. Each holiday is hard because you remember the special times that you had with that person and it is hard to look past the sad times.
Why we get thru some years easier than others I cannot even to begin to wonder or explain why. But then you get a special note or picture from someone connected to the loved one and it takes you right back to the DAY.
Thirteen years ago my DH's brother was taken away before his time. The first year after was the worst. No one celebrated any holiday. We were like robots. I had a stair stepper in the living room and when my DD asked if i was going to set up a tree, I told her no. She got really mad and i put the presents around the stair stepper and strung tinsel all over it. But in my mind that was all I could do at the time and no one else in the family had a tree so why should I?
He had moved to California and set up a landscaping business and found the mate of his life and they married and everything was so perfect for them. Since this family keeps in touch, he made a video and sent it home for all of us and of course we responded with our own sense of very dry humor. our own version of Brad the landscaper dealing with workers he had picked off the side of the road, hunting from the back deck. the top ten reasons for not using the BIG movie light for taking movies of the family and on and on. Plus every so often he came back to visit because to him, family was so very important
The night of Jan 3, 1993, a Sunday night, we got a call that Brad and Stephanie were expecting their first child. I cannot even begin to tell you the excitement every family member was feeling. Our kids will tell you about Uncle Brad singing Black Bird on his guitar and how they could not wait till he did this with his own child. (My DD had this played at her wedding while my DH and she danced the first dance) not a dry eye in the place.
The next day we got the call that he was dead. Weird thing, he was repairing a brick wall of damage from 30 days before and some idiot that had just been released from the hospital for chest pains was out driving and passed out, went over the median and hit Brad and killed him almost instantly. There was concern whether we would be able to have a viewing because of that kind of injury. (Some of us were in the mindset that we would see him no matter what)
The funeral was just unbelievable. The procession from the church to the cemetary was about a mile long of cars. It was so comforting to all of us. Because of their excitement, they had sent another tape and that arrived two days after he was killed. We could not watch that tape for about 6 months. Funny thing tho, three days after, we all sat around and watched him when he was on The Price Is Right. To hear "Bradley Hartman, come on down!!!!" again was so touching. Afterwards, we all looked at each other with smiles on our faces and someone in the room piped up "Brad still didnt win the Showcase Showdown!!!
Well Jacob was born 8 months later and he is just the light of the family. His Mom comes to visit and he really is coming into his own. He was ring bearer at my DD's wedding on 5/11/02 and if things had been different on 9/15/01 he would have been the same for my DS. In fact his Mom remarried and Jake has a brother and sister. We got his picture this Christmas and this is what stirred my emotions upside down. he looks so very much like his dad.
Love your family and love your life. It comes and goes so very fast. Time is very unforgiving.
Terry
I'm sorry. Next weekend is a three day weekend though!!! Sending you lots of 
that Julia and Nick are healthy soon (and that you and Steve stay healthy too!)
Go me!
