Sending

and

to everyone. I know you can all use them.
Ok, so I'm not caught up. Not even sure when I last posted. Not sure I am cohrent enough to post. I'm sorry if this post is scatter brained. I just want to update you on my life without breaking down in tears due to frustration.
I have been working too many hours. Plus I had a Brownie sleep over this weekend. Have been sick on and off. Sore throat, earache, nauseous, coughing, I think I might have a sinus infection and I definitely have a fever. I should probably call in sick but I feel way to guilty to do so and after today I think my manager might freak out if I end up sick also.
I am frustrated that today when I went into work my co-worker handed me his keys, said our manager pushed him over the edge and left. *** So now I might be working more hours. I worked almost 70 this week plus planned and held a brownie meeting and planned and held a Brownie sleepover. I really don't think they appreciated it.
Got so much to try and do and so little time. This week I have GS cookie sorting and distribution plus a service unit meeting. Luckily I cancelled the troop meeting, but some parents were giving me grief for it. Hello, we had a sleepover this weekend plus cookie sorting, distrbution and a service unit meeting this coming week. But they just want to have their Wednesday night so they have have their time away from their kid.
I really hope it doesn't snow much because it will make my life harder because I have to go to work whether it snows or not.
My manager stopped in today to attempt to figure out hours to fill in. We didn't get very far. She is doing way too much also. Who knows what is going to happen with filling in the hours. She also does massages. She said I needed a massage. I said she needed a massage. We both decided we need a massage and to get away.
Plus my circle journal which has been booknapped and the person said they were going to release it reccently has yet to do so.
Plus my Grandfather is in the hospital with gout and his heart rate had been at 168 beats per minute. He isn't doing that well. This is a bad time for him to be sick like this because 3 years ago my other grandfather died around this time and we had his funeral on Valentine's day. I am hoping to not have a repeat.
I wish I could just hop on a plane and go anywhere away from here. I need a spontaneous trip, road trip or whatever. I just need to get away.
I am so

. I am really bad about getting my feelings out and I always get to the point where I break down and just cry for hours. But I am not there yet so my frustration level just builds

and I don't know how to reduce it. I try things but they never seem to work. I know I just need to cry but I am not there yet.
Sorry to blab on and on. It's so sad I am apologizing in my own venting. I don't know how to say no and I always feel everything is my fault.
Becky