Hey DDAs...... I could use a little pixie dust today, if you have some to spare
I'm looking over all this stuff that has to be done from March 16th - June 1st and I'm SO overwhelmed, it's not even funny.... and Kyle is out of town and can't calm me down.
What excited me for so long (Match Day, moving, buying a house, starting a family, etc) is REALLY stressing me out.... because it all has to happen so quickly. Someone, HELP! Tell me it's going to be ok even BEFORE residency's over.
We knew better than to plan our lives out.... as soon as you do that, you're thrown a curveball and I HATE curveballs. So we didn't.... we just had a general idea of the direction it was going, and that seemed like enough of a light at the end of this monstrous tunnel.
Now I've ran some numbers and talked with realtors in the places we are looking, and have spoken with employers and schools, etc..... and it is SO much that it has my head spinning.
On March 17th, we wake up after Match Day and the madness begins. Now just the stress of the Match is enough -- finding out where you live, looking for a place, etc in a couple quick months. But add to that grad school, etc...... and I don't know where to begin! If we want to buy a place.... and we're not looking for the house of our dreams, big enough for 3 kids, etc yet.... I'm talking a place that we dont have to deal with crappy landlords, that has a yard and allows dogs, and has a few rooms. And isn't falling apart, because goodness knows we won't have any spare time to deal with home improvements. But if we want that, I can't afford to do a Nurse Practitioner program yet. Which is fine, lots of people wait.... but I wanted this done before having kids, because I want to stay home with them if our situation allows.
So now I feel like we have to chose having a place to live or finishing school or having kids, but can't have more than one. And that's probably not the case, but I just don't even know where to begin right now........
Before anyone says otherwise, I realize that this is no bigger than most people handle. People put off going to school to have kids. People rent for a year before buying a house..... I'm not saying my problems are bigger than the next girl's...
I'm just having one of those days where the light at the end of the tunnel just escaped me again......
Thanks for listening. I feel like I'm alone here without Kyle around and just the dog staring at me crying like I'm nuts!
