The DDA Trouble Free Zone Part 18

[ellenbenny]

I swore I wasn't going to do it. I promised myself that it didn't matter, as long as the kids had a fun Christmas. But the blues are starting to get to me and I am trying my best not to let them. I so wish I had someone to share this holiday season with and to make a family with for my kids. There. I said it. I've cried a few tears. Now I need to toughen up and get over it.

Tammi, I am so sorry you are feeling bad.

My issue every year, even after all these years, is I hate sharing my kids with their dad. I do it, and I try not to let it bother me because I obviously know I have to and it's the right thing for them, and yet I always have some moments when I cry over it. I hate holiday moments without them. Good luck staying tough throughout the holidays, but don't feel too bad if you need a good cry every now and again.

 

[babytrees]

I swore I wasn't going to do it. I promised myself that it didn't matter, as long as the kids had a fun Christmas. But the blues are starting to get to me and I am trying my best not to let them. I so wish I had someone to share this holiday season with and to make a family with for my kids. There. I said it. I've cried a few tears. Now I need to toughen up and get over it.

Tammi-

I understand the blues....you are entitled to them and please, please don't hesitate to come to us with them!! Please don't toughen up too much and always remember that even though we aren't there in person you are always on our minds!!

 

[babytrees]

Tammi. It's only natural that you would feel a little bit blue right about now. I'd be worried about you if you weren't. I wish that you and the kids could come here for Christmas. There's so much noise and bustle around my house, I don't think there would be time for the blues. I'm sure that this holiday will be the hardest. However, just look at all you have accomplished without the ex. You have proven that you are a capable woman, who can take care of herself and her children. You are one of the strongest women I know. You should be proud of yourself for the growth that you have made this year.

Let yourself have a good cry. It will do you good. Then, make some new traditions with the kids. Try out a new restaurant, go see a movie, have popcorn and a movie at home in new pj's. Find a way to make this holiday yours and the kids (without the ex!) Make sure you take some time for yourself, too. A bubble bath with some chocolate to nibble on would fit the bill nicely!

Most of all, please know that we are here for you. Vent, cry, scream, and let us help you through this. We're as close as the internet or phone lines can get us.

P.S. My invitation is a sincere one. If you and the kids ever want to take me up on it, you'd be welcome!

I like what Glynis said....start new traditions!! I have no idea what Christmases were like before my parents divorced but I do remember the traditions that were started afterward!!!

 

[babytrees]

Seems silly to be asking this but I can't find my Annabelle's Wish.....I bought the DVD at the same time as Glynis and watched it once but now can't find it again....can you all send some finding dust this way so I can watch it again this Christmas season???

 

[ReAnSt]

Seems silly to be asking this but I can't find my Annabelle's Wish.....I bought the DVD at the same time as Glynis and watched it once but now can't find it again....can you all send some finding dust this way so I can watch it again this Christmas season???

Theresa- Hope you find your movie. Did you ask eveybody in the house if they knew where it is? Perhaps somebody else moved it.

 

[Tammi67]

You all are wonderful! Thank you so much. You have given me much to think and be happy about. Just admitting to myself (and putting it out there to you all) that I am sad made me feel better. I guess that is the first step in dealing with it. I have already thought about the new traditions thing. We are going to Mass on Christmas Eve (usually went in the AM). Now I've decided to have a relaxing morning opening presents and taking the time to enjoy it, then later in the morning making Glynis overnight toast and caramelized bacon. I don't know what we will do the rest of the day. Maybe go to a movie. I bought a glazed ham that just needs to be cooked, although with just me and 2 little kids, we will be eating leftover ham for a long time!

Thank you all. I don't know what I would do without you. And I sincerely mean that.

 

[babytrees]

Theresa- Hope you find your movie. Did you ask eveybody in the house if they knew where it is? Perhaps somebody else moved it.

Yup...that's what's driving me nuts!!

 

[Glynis]

Seems silly to be asking this but I can't find my Annabelle's Wish.....I bought the DVD at the same time as Glynis and watched it once but now can't find it again....can you all send some finding dust this way so I can watch it again this Christmas season???

We would be lost without our Annabelle's Wish. It's the twins favorite Christmas movie. We thought our was lost a couple of days ago, but we found it....in Leslie's backpack. She took it to preschool without telling me about it. I hope your copy is as easy to find!

 

[tinknme]

Thank you all for the suggestions! We have now switched gears & are having a pool party lol

We get use of the pool & an adjacent room for $70. This is for the whole day, we can stay as long as we want! This is at a hotel here in town(to chilly for outdoors lol). I will order pizza & bring some soda & we should be set.

I think I will save the Birthday cake for his actual Birthday, unless Garrett wants one there as well.

 

[Glynis]

You all are wonderful! Thank you so much. You have given me much to think and be happy about. Just admitting to myself (and putting it out there to you all) that I am sad made me feel better. I guess that is the first step in dealing with it. I have already thought about the new traditions thing. We are going to Mass on Christmas Eve (usually went in the AM). Now I've decided to have a relaxing morning opening presents and taking the time to enjoy it, then later in the morning making Glynis overnight toast and caramelized bacon. I don't know what we will do the rest of the day. Maybe go to a movie. I bought a glazed ham that just needs to be cooked, although with just me and 2 little kids, we will be eating leftover ham for a long time!

Thank you all. I don't know what I would do without you. And I sincerely mean that.

One tradition that Alan and I started when we moved away from family, was to buy a new puzzle, wrap it and put it under the tree. After all the presents are opened, we set up a card table, and work on the puzzle in our pj's. We pop popcorn, nibble on chips and dip, and spend the day doing our puzzle. Now the kids get in on it as well. It's become a fun tradition.

 

[tinknme]

Tammi I wish I could be there to give you a hug, hopefully this one will help I know it will be hard for you. You have 2 beautiful children that love you more than anything else in this world & that makes you very blessed.

I swore I wasn't going to do it. I promised myself that it didn't matter, as long as the kids had a fun Christmas. But the blues are starting to get to me and I am trying my best not to let them. I so wish I had someone to share this holiday season with and to make a family with for my kids. There. I said it. I've cried a few tears. Now I need to toughen up and get over it.

 

[tinker1bell]

I swore I wasn't going to do it. I promised myself that it didn't matter, as long as the kids had a fun Christmas. But the blues are starting to get to me and I am trying my best not to let them. I so wish I had someone to share this holiday season with and to make a family with for my kids. There. I said it. I've cried a few tears. Now I need to toughen up and get over it.

Tammi

 

[PrincessLeighsDaddy]

Thanks Glynis! I have a gingerbread cake mix in the pantry. Do you think that I could subsitute that for the cake recipe? I think it should work. Now to make a quick trip to the grocery to get the rest of the ingredients. Can I buy just one marischino cherry? Guess I will have to eat the rest.

Here you go. It's a 2 parter.

Gingerbread Cake

1/2 C. butter flavored shortening
1/3 C. sugar
1 C. molasses
3/4 C. water
1 egg
2 1/3 C. flour
1 ts. baking soda
1 tsp. ground ginger
1 tsp. ground cinnamon
3/4 tsp. salt

In a large mixing bowl, cream shortening and sugar. Add molasses, water and egg. Combine flour, baking soda, ginger, cinnamon and salt; add to creamed mixture and beat until combined. Pour into a greased 15 X 10 X 1" jelly roll pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 18-22 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean.

Gingerbread Trifle

2 C. cold milk
1 pkg. (instant) French Vanilla pudding mix
7 C. cubed gingerbread cake
3/4 C. English toffee bits
1 carton Cool Whip (French vanilla flavor, if you can find it), thawed
1 maraschino cherry

In a mixing bowl, beat milk and pudding mix on low speed for 2 minutes. In a 2 quart trifle bowl, layer half the cake cubes and pudding. Sprinkle with 1/2 cup toffee bits. Top with remaining cake and pudding. Spread Cool Whip over the top; sprinkle with remaining toffee bits. Garnish with the cherry.

Make sure you put it into the refrigerator before you serve it. Also, store any leftovers in the fridge, as well.

 

[mommykds]

Glynis,
That sounds like a wonderful gift!! How long does it chance from each picture?

Elizabeth,
Daniel used that word for about 2 months (maybe 2 years ago) & everyone said to ignore it & he just stopped..Sounds embarrassing in a store but alot of us moms have been there...by the way he learned it from one of his friends on the block, not me!!

Bernadette,
Here is a link to the book for your DH.
http://www.amazon.com/Team-Rivals-Doris-Kearns-Goodwin/dp/0684824906

Tom,
Thanks for the card!!!!!!! What a lovely family picture!

 

[lovesdumbo]

Hi guys. I'm sorry I haven't been around in a while. I was reading along most of the time, but just got tired of posting such negative news about Mom. The short message is that she seemed to be getting much better, then they got as far as they could weaning her and weren't able to make any more progress. We had to turn off the ventilator, as she had a medical directive against living with one, and it was time to end the suffering without hope of her ever getting better.

It was the hardest thing I've ever had to go through -- she's been in the hospital since August 23rd, and I've missed a total of 4 days seeing her. I'm lucky I have such a great boss. It took a real toll on my family, but Randy is an amazing Dad and really did well without me around much.

The support you have shown me has made such a difference to me. I promised my Dad that we would make our scheduled trip to Disney, and although I shed many tears, we are here at WDW. Thank you to everyone who contributed to all the wonderful surprises I've received. Since we had 4 hours to pack before leaving on this trip, a number of things were left behind, including the card reader to be able to post pictures. As soon as we get home, or get a card reader, I will post pictures.

I have also really appreciated the posts, PMs, notes, postcards sent from trips and Christmas cards. I prayed for God to take her because I didn't want to see her suffer, so I was relieved at first, then mad because she didn't take care of herself, and now heartbreaking sorrow that she is no longer with us. Our Pastor said that was normal and that I shouldn't worry or feel guilty, that it's part of the grieving process.

I know many of you have already delt with this, and I may need some advice as we get on down the road. On one hand I still can't believe that the Mom I used to see every day now is gone, yet she's been so sick for so long that it's hard to remember the good times.

Thanks again for everything.

Marci

 

[Glynis]

Thanks Glynis! I have a gingerbread cake mix in the pantry. Do you think that I could subsitute that for the cake recipe? I think it should work. Now to make a quick trip to the grocery to get the rest of the ingredients. Can I buy just one marischino cherry? Guess I will have to eat the rest.

I would think it would work fine. Just make it in a jelly roll pan so it's not so thick.

To tell you the truth, I never use the maraschino cherry. I just add extra toffee bits, and more whipped cream.

 

[Glynis]

Glynis,
That sounds like a wonderful gift!! How long does it chance from each picture?

Elizabeth,
Daniel used that word for about 2 months (maybe 2 years ago) & everyone said to ignore it & he just stopped..Sounds embarrassing in a store but alot of us moms have been there...by the way he learned it from one of his friends on the block, not me!!

Bernadette,
Here is a link to the book for your DH.
http://www.amazon.com/Team-Rivals-Doris-Kearns-Goodwin/dp/0684824906

Tom,
Thanks for the card!!!!!!! What a lovely family picture!

The frame we got was a Kodak frame, and you could set it to change the photos anywhere from 3 seconds per picture to 60 seconds. You can set it to do special effects as the pictures change, you can add music to the slide show. It's really cool! We got it at Target.

 

[PrincessLeighsDaddy]

Tammi, it is o.k. to be a little sad over the holidays.
I am resistant to change sometimes, so I can imagine having to rethink how to do things as a family of three might feel strange now, but I am sure that it will get easier in the future. Know that we are here for you if you need a shoulder to cry on.

You definitely brighten each of my days when I see your use of smilies in the morning. It definitely puts a smile on my face. It is what keeps me coming back for more each day!

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

Anne Marie - My typical response is to ignore it, then ask him a question to try to get him talking about something else. But today he was absolutely bent on yelling it through Target! I am pleased that he stopped when I told him to stop. I must have looked serious about it. Momboss told me he has been saying it on weekends, I just hadn't heard it. Guess he thought he would try it out on me and see what happened.

 

[Kitchensinkguy]

I don't know, Chris....I liked the Hercules, but there's something very appealing about the new siggie!

I'll have to admit, this signature is probally more accurate.