"Thank you, Sweetie."

[NHdisneylover]

While it is not a term I would use with an adult it really wouldn't bother me for more than possibly 2 seconds. I wouldn't remember it long enough to get home and post about it for sure

PLEASE tell me you are joking about preferring to be called a word we can't type here over sweetie

Ma'am does offend many people not from the south. I got reamed by a friend's mom once when I called her Ma'am. I am originally from Texas and it was just habit but her mom thought I was being cheeky. That was the only time anyone got really upset with me, but plenty of other people would shoot daggers with their eyes when I said it. My boss at my first job (retail fabric store) actually asked me to not call customers Ma'am or Sir because it made them uncomfortable.

Oh, and the bank president thing--if she were at Arbys she would probably be called sweetie too--and if you were meeting her at the bank you would probably both call each other Ma'am. It is the situation, as much if not more than, the person which dictates this stuff.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

lMy husband even calls me ma'am sometimes.

If he's saying "YES ma'am!" it's all good.

I'm with you, OP. I don't really like it either. If you don't know me, save the terms of endearment for someone you do know.

I agree. True, it's better than being called a *****, or being ignored, or some other inappropriate behavior, but it's still inappropriate in and of itself, particularly coming from a kid to an older adult. Do I get all worked up over it? No. But, yes, I have an opinion about it and I'm giving it on a discussion board, even knowing there are bigger things in life. In case anyone wants to point any of those things out.

 

[Liberty Belle]

While it is not a term I would use with an adult it really wouldn't bother me for more than possibly 2 seconds. I wouldn't remember it long enough to get home and post about it for sure

PLEASE tell me you are joking about preferring to be called a word we can't type here over sweetie

Ma'am does offend many people not from the south. I got reamed by a friend's mom once when I called her Ma'am. I am originally from Texas and it was just habit but her mom thought I was being cheeky. That was the only time anyone got really upset with me, but plenty of other people would shoot daggers with their eyes when I said it. My boss at my first job (retail fabric store) actually asked me to not call customers Ma'am or Sir because it made them uncomfortable.

Oh, and the bank president thing--if she were at Arbys she would probably be called sweetie too--and if you were meeting her at the bank you would probably both call each other Ma'am. It is the situation, as much if not more than, the person which dictates this stuff.

Only half-way joking.

I see what you're saying about the president/vs Arby's customer.

I guess part of it comes from my personality. I'm kind of formal. It takes a while for me to get close to people, etc. Also, I love 19th century literature, where there weren't many Sweeties and Loves unless it was coming from an older person, but there were a lot more Ma'ams and such.

 

[Liberty Belle]

If he's saying "YES ma'am!" it's all good. I agree. True, it's better than being called a *****, or being ignored, or some other inappropriate behavior, but it's still inappropriate in and of itself, particularly coming from a kid to an older adult. Do I get all worked up over it? No. But, yes, I have an opinion about it and I'm giving it on a discussion board, even knowing there are bigger things in life. In case anyone wants to point any of those things out.

lol it usually is a "yes, ma'am" from him.

 

[ajk912]

I think you are overreacting a bit. That wouldn't even register as a blip on my radar of things I should worry about enough to remember 20+ minutes later to post on the DIS. Like the pps have said, if they are around to take my order and give me my stuff that I asked for with the correct total and correct change- that's all I care about.

 

[HerdOHuds]

I am with the op on this one. While it isn't something that will ruin my whole day, I tend to want to respond to a "Here you go, Sweetie" with an "Sure thing, Honey!"

I really think that those sort of names should be reserved for folks you know really well. Really, really well!


I usually get a chuckle out of it. I heard a server call my dad, "Honey" one time and we couldn't stifle the snorts every time she returned to our table.

 

[Dan Murphy]

Wow, I call people "sweetie" all the time! And it's only the ones I really like AND respect!!...

Hey, have you ever called me 'sweetie'?

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

I think you are overreacting a bit. That wouldn't even register as a blip on my radar of things I should worry about enough to remember 20+ minutes later to post on the DIS. Like the pps have said, if they are around to take my order and give me my stuff that I asked for with the correct total and correct change- that's all I care about.

First, the OP doesn't seem at all "worried" about anything. Second, she posts on the DIS often, and often as a thread starter, so it's probably just a topic she thought about posting more than someone, such as you or myself, who doesn't post/start threads as much, and is not an indication of how "distraught" she was about the topic.

Of course when I'm purchasing something, I want my order taken, I want to get my correct order, and I want my correct change. I would hope that along with all that that we haven't totally dismissed respect for the customer. Obviously, what constitutes respect means different things to different people, and therein lies a reason it's being discussed. When it comes to etiquette, and behavior in general, there's nothing like the DIS for finding out there are far different opinions (my favorite being "It's THEIR wedding...they can do anything they want" ). I'm just not a fan of the idea that "anything goes" as long as I get my food and my money back, but it's never ruined my day, nor the OPs, I'm guessing.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I am with the op on this one. While it isn't something that will ruin my whole day, I tend to want to respond to a "Here you go, Sweetie" with an "Sure thing, Honey!"

I really think that those sort of names should be reserved for folks you know really well. Really, really well!


I usually get a chuckle out of it. I heard a server call my dad, "Honey" one time and we couldn't stifle the snorts every time she returned to our table.

That's how I feel. I didn't post on here because it ruined my day or because I was so angry. It annoys me and I was curious how others felt. I guess there's only a handful of us who feel this way, at least here on the Dis.

And I was a little bored and looking for something to post about.

 

[AndreaDM]

OP, I hear you! This is one of my biggest pet peeves ever! I hate being called hon, sweetie or babe by anyone who isn't either 90 or related to me. I think it sounds degrading coming from a teenager. Sorry, but I'm a 40 year old mother of three with a college degree and a career, I'm NOT your hon!

I walked out of Motherhood when I was hugely pregnant because this chipper little size 2, 19 year old girl kept calling me hon and babe. I don't think you should be allowed to even work there unless you've given birth! A car salesman also lost a sale from us because he kept asking me, "so what do you think of the color sweetie?". Hmm, I was also pregnant that time so maybe it bothered me more then.

I'll take Ma'am over hon any day, I've earned it!

 

[sajetto]

Wow, I call people "sweetie" all the time! And it's only the ones I really like AND respect!!

As for ma'am, never said it, probably never will. And yes, I live in Georgia. Somehow "ma'am" doesn't sound right with a Brooklyn accent...

Sorry you felt bad about it, LB, I'll think twice before I say it again!

Same here. Geez, I really wish I had that much of time on my hands to be so peeved about it.

 

[krcit]

It doesn't bother me but I have been known to throw out a hon or a sweetheart here and there I'm just happy when people are pleasant to each other. In fact, my Dr called me 'sugarplum' the other day...I thought it was adorable

 

[Shyvioletisme]

That's what the Arby's employee said to me today when I picked up shakes for my sons. She was about 17 or 18.

It just annoys the heck out of me. I'm sorry, but I think it's incredibly rude. I am not 10 years old, neither am I 90. Please do not call me sweetie unless we are very close friends (and I'm upset), immediate family, or are intimate!

How do you feel about this?

wouldn't bother me.
Here in Texas I've been called sweetie, darling, and honey numerous times by female store employees. It's just the way some people talk and I've never thought it was rude or meant to be for that matter either. People here of all ages also call people ma'am or sir here a lot as well. I don't see that as rude either, just the way people have always talked here so I am extremely used to it.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Same here. Geez, I really wish I had that much of time on my hands to be so peeved about it.

Aww, don't worry, I'm not "so peeved" about it. As you see above, I posted it because I was curious about how other felt and bored.

But I'm sure there's things you get steamed about that I wouldn't give a second thought to. We all have twenty-four hours in our days.

 

[happygirl]

It wouldn't bother me at all.

 

[KristaTX]

As someone else said, I usually feel sorry for the person saying "sweetie" or "honey" in this situation because they sound like they are trying to be nice but are also ignorant about how it really sounds. I have a coworker who calls patients "sweetie", and I always wonder if I should point out to her that it sounds rather condescending.

"Ma'am" doesn't bother me if the person is under 20 or so. I am "ma'am" to them. But it also doesn't bother me if they don't say it.

On the other hand, I don't like being called "Miss Krista" by children as has become quite common around here. When kids at church or wherever call me that, I tell them with a smile that they can just call me "Krista" .

I am also bothered by "No problem", as has been discussed here on the DIS. I love going to Chick-fil-a because you can tell that they have been trained to say things like "My pleasure" with a smile and usually eye-to-eye contact. I'm sure they must be coached never to say "No problem". I like that they teach their young employees some communication skills.

 

[DisneyFan32WI]

That's what the Arby's employee said to me today when I picked up shakes for my sons. She was about 17 or 18.

It just annoys the heck out of me. I'm sorry, but I think it's incredibly rude. I am not 10 years old, neither am I 90. Please do not call me sweetie unless we are very close friends (and I'm upset), immediate family, or are intimate!

How do you feel about this?

This MUST be a regional thing. NOBODY, I SWEAR, says this in WI.

 

[perdidobay]

i just think it's courteous. Better than them handing you something with no smile, saying nothing at all like they hate their job. But then, i live in the south, so everyone calls everyone sweetie, honey, darlin', etc etc etc

mte

 

[ols386]

Wouldn't bother me at all. Being called ma'am, I really don't like that. Makes me feel old.

 

[Hutchy]

I think it's so weird that people get bothered by sir or ma'am. To me, it's something said because of respect for that person and nothing else.

I agree, I was taught to call people ma'am and sir growing up and I still do it to anyone older than me to this day. I consider it being polite. And I would have no problem with someone calling me Sweetie either, it's a lot better than some names!!