Tell us about your strange neighborhood "characters"

[joshsmom]

Originally posted by HeyMickey
There's a guy near me who spends 20 minutes circling his car before he gets in it. He'll open the door and stick his head in, then walk all the way around while looking underneath, stick his head in again . . .

Maybe he's checking out the Febreeze in his car (have you seen the commercial??) or his new car smell!!

 

[ScarlettO]

Originally posted by Lisa L from MI
Well, I don't have strange names of actual people but when referring to some neighbors houses....I refer to their houses...such as:

The Yucky Neighbors house
The ugly porch house
The condemned house (hasn't been in years....they fixed it)
The cop house (the cops moved over 5 years ago)
The drug dealer house (it wasn't....don't know why)
The Augustine Pena house (at our old house...our neighbor resembled this teenage murderer in a surrounding community)

LOL! This is exactly what I do if I'm discussing a neighbor!

"The house with the curved driveway"
"The house with the collie" "The house next to the sewer station" and so on....

 

[lstokes]

He is the neighbor hood vigilante!

We had a rash of "eggings" one summer and the cul-de-sac was sick and tired of it.

My DH took it upon himsef to sit on the porch, with a baseball bat, no less, and wait for the poor souls to try to egg again.

He caught the teen ager with a case of eggs! I was on the phone to the police dispatch and she could hear my DH yelling at the kid he had flat on the driveway with a knee in his back! Dispatcher told me to "Calm my DH down, the officers were on their way."

Kids parents had no idea he was even out of the house at midnight, so hopefully that family had their eyes opened to the kids actions.

DH chases speeders down also to get their license plates and yells at them "that there are children playing here and I will report you!"

Gotta love him!!!

 

[wendyl]

THREADS LIKE THIS ARE WHY I LOVE THE COMMUNITY BOARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for starting this one grinning ghost!!!!

These stories are awesome

 

[Maleficent13]

I have the neighbors across the street. They are a mom, a dad and two kids, one 6 and one 3. For some reason, they have 4 cars. Two in the driveway and two on the street, and sometimes 5, which since they're out of room they park in front of my house. The funny thing is, I never see anyone go in or out, but the cars are always in different spots. Every day I go home and just wonder.

 

[Jeafl]

The people that moved in next door are quite interesting. The woman is a native american, who although was born on a reservation, has lived in the Chicago suburbs for quite awhile. She decided to divorce her husband and marry another native american who has lived on the reservation all his life (they were childhood sweethearts). The problem is, the husband hadn't moved out before the new guy moved in. They were all living together for a few months. The old husband moved into the basement, and the new guy moved in the bedroom with her. They have 3 children 9, 13, and 16 living there as well. Needless to say the kids are a little confused.

Well, the new husband (they recently married) is not used to not being near a lot of open land, so he walks the perimeter of the yard over and over again. He also wears cut off shorts so short that the pockets are longer than the actual shorts. He also rips all his sleeves off his shirts. He hates living in the suburbs and wants to go back to the reservation eventually.

They also were growing pot in the backyard, and thought nobody would notice. My BIL was pushing my nephew on our swingset and noticed it growing next to their deck. He asked him what it was, and the guy next door said "I don't know". Coincidentally, a few days later they dug it up during the middle of the night.

The strangest part of all is that the woman runs an in-home daycare. She is licensed to watch 12 children, but I swear there is more than that at times. There are always a million cars coming and going from that house, and it drives the rest of the neighborhood nuts.

All in all though, they are pleasant people. They don't really bother me much, but a lot of my snobby neighbors want them to move ASAP.

 

[snoopy]

My next door neighbor is a 75-year old retired government worker, yet every day he goes out to get his paper in his bathrobe and hardhat. As far as any of us know, he never worked in construction.

His wife left the house one time in the 12 years we have lived there. Unfortunately for us, it was to come barrelling down the street in reverse, only stopping when she smashed into our van. Apparently something happened to her brakes, whether that was the brakes on her car or the brakes on her impulses we still aren't sure.

They are sweet people though. Weird, and sweet.

 

[DizzieDizney]

We live in a circle...on one end we have "the house with the man with short shorts".....there's nothing really wrong w/ the family...but we always see him working in the yard w/ really really short shorts...and other days he is out playing basketball or football w/ his boys....and yep, he's still wearing those same really really short black shorts....LOL

then across the way from us we have the "weird lady"....every time she comes home she leaves all the doors and back trunk/door of her suv open......she leaves them open all night! and at times she'll leave in the middle of the night and will come back early morning.....she has 2 boys...6 and 3 yrs old...so I don't know when she sleeps.....the times she doesn't leave in the middle of the night she walks around her house talking on the phone....and she is so loud i'm sure the whole neighborhood can hear her.....oh and one time I was throwing out some old stuff.....an old walker, an old broken baby swing, stroller that was broken, and a drawer that we saved from an old dresser that just never got thrown out......she came and took them from the side of the street!!! The next day she came over and told me that she was going to sell the stuff at a flea market! She asked if I was going to be throwing out more stuff. Weird huh?

 

[tkd lisa]

We have a neighbor who's a retired minister. According to other neighbors, they are pretty well off (I know they went to Ireland for several weeks on vacation recently). Anyone he walks down and reads our neighbors paper every day! One time, our neighbor who's paper he reads was on vacation and had asked us to take in the papers (cause he really hates the other guy reading them). Since we are up early, the paper was in our house by the time the minister came by. He actually rang our doorbell and asked to read the paper! After standing on our porch for 10 minutes, he said "do you think they'd mind if I cut out this article? I'm doing a research paper related to it?"

I told him that I thought the neighbors really wanted the paper. I then asked him if he had access to the internet, since the Washington Post is available for free, in it's entirety on-line. He said yes he did, but really preferred it in the paper form. Then he left. That was probably 2 years ago, and I still see him nearly every day reading our neighbors paper out on the street!!

 

[edcrbnsoul]

My BIL has these neighbors across the street we call the Circus people, you'll look outside and there will be 10 kids up in the tree and I'm not talking in the bottom branches, I'm talking the top of the tree where the branches are so thin you can see them bending and the mother will be out there yelling at them and they 'll climb on porch roof, and the husband always making something...no clue he's got welders and wire and wood but you never see any finished project. Its always like a three ring circus we just pull up chairs and watch the fun.

 

[stevenpensacola]

We've got the "dog walking lady".

She lives down the street from us. She walks her dog every morning at 7:00.

The dog is a little pekinese.

The lady is probably 55-60 years old. Overweight but not really fat....sort of round up top with normal looking legs.

She has Dolly Parton hair.

She's wearing silk pajamas.

She also wearing high heels.

She thinks she's lookin' good.

 

[grinningghost]

Originally posted by wendyl
THREADS LIKE THIS ARE WHY I LOVE THE COMMUNITY BOARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for starting this one grinning ghost!!!!

You are very welcome - they're why I love it too.

 

[missypie]

A guy who lived across the street was a cable installer by profession. We once got a phone call from the FBI, asking if we knew what the guy did for a living. Later, the FBI came to his house and asked him to remove the radio equipment that was in his attic...he said "sure." The FBI said "Now. While we watch." The neighborhad so much radio equipment in his attic that it was interfering with the signals at DFW airport!

Guy's wife finally left him. Another lady moved in. DH is home with our baby and gets a call from the police "Do you have a back door? We need you to leave your house through the back door and meet at the end of the block." All the back yards were fenced, so DH climbed over all the fences; police helped with the baby. The guy's wife was holding him hostage at gun point, or something like that. After a while, both guy and wife were taken away in cuffs...he came back after a day or so; she never did.

Guy FINALLY decided to move. Needless to say, his yard looked like something out of the Munsters. His neighbor mowed his lawn and kept his bushes trimmed so someone would buy the house and get him out of the neighborhood!

 

[grinningghost]

My Mom's strange neighbors are a mother and daughter. The mother is in her 60's the daughter is 39.

They are both very short and fat and dress exactly alike. When they decorate their house for holidays, they will spend hours measuring and primping before they settle on something. Then, afterward, they pull out lawn chairs (even in winter) and set them up side by side, facing the house and sit down and look at their work. For hours. And they giggle.

Scary stuff.

 

[DukeStreetKing]

Originally posted by crazyforgoofy

The other is my next door neighbor. We call him Satan's brother-in-law and his wife Satan's sister. She's shrill, really bossy and mean as a snake. He is SO overwhelmed he tries to stay out of her way by working in the yard all day all year round. She yells, he ducks and starts the lawn mower again........

I'm pretty sure I read about this couple in one of delswife's trip reports.

 

[HeyMickey]

Oh, and I forgot about my new across-the-street neighbor, who wears a fur coat and stilletto heels when she takes her baby out for a walk around the (suburban, mostly old people, definitely not fashionable) neighborhood.

 

[MosMom]

At our old house, we had a woman who would smoke outside in a bathrobe. She had a folding chair set up on the driveway and would sit there while smoking. She also would walk the neighborhood in daisy dukes, a super tight tube top with her bra sticking out, and super high heels. She had a son who was about 7 or 8 at the time and one Halloween, he was a pirate and she escorted him as a wench (let's just say it was a VERY authentic costume ). The husband had a plywood room built into their garage and would leave the door open from time to time...I swear it was a sex room. It had all sorts of interesting looking things in there. I can't imagine what else it would be. OH! They also had a red porch light so Chris swears she was a hooker and ran an operation out of her house.

 

[ScarlettO]

My next door neighbor (early 50's) became a widower a couple of years ago. In January, a Blonde woman has suddenly started living with him. She has no vehicle, and stays home all day. She sort of looks like an ex-barmaid.

The other day she was doing yardwork in a swimsuit top and shorts....across her shoulders and down her back is a giant tatoo. I couldn't tell if it was a parrot with a long tail or a big lizard!

 

[missy28]

In my neighborhood we have what I call the Crack House and the Clown House...

The Crack House is full of strange people who like to walk out into the middle of the street in the middle fo the night and have screaming matches... (I work in law enforcement so I get to call my pals to come bust them up all the time)...

The CLown House is across the street, and they seem like a very nice family but there must be about 25 people living in that house!! And the floor plan is the same as mine, so I don't know where they put everyone!!

Growing up, we had a mentally disabled man named Noah who would stand on the corner all day and just wave at the cars... we always had to go "wave to Noah!"

 

[4cruisin]

We've had several strange neighbors. There is the drug runners, they have lived across the street for 5 years. Husband, wife and teenage son. The husband or wife goes out for a 5 to 15 minute car ride about 20 times a day. We have never seen them bring in grocery bags, they never put their shades up or open a window. The wife is the scariest thing I have ever seen. She weighs about 65 lbs and looks like a 12 y o boy. I think they live on coffee and butts. I feel bad for the son, but he is as weird as the parents.

Another couple, both professionals, let their kids run around the neighborhood naked. One neighbor went over to the father one time and said "Hey Jay, little Spike is in Nellie's yard naked." Jay said, "Oh, is he burning his feet? " The other neighbor just shook his head and walked away.

Then there are the Munsters...these people won't even acknowledge you if they walk past you. If you try to strike up a conversation with them, you get 1 word answers and they won't look at you. Again, they never put up a shade or open a window.

Then, there is the neighbor that thinks he is better than everyone else. If you park in front of his house, he takes his vehicles and blocks you in so you cannot move. He thinks he owns the sidewalk and street, (public way) in front of his house. He wants to move to a "better" neighborhood with better neighbors because he thinks we are all slumming it. Mind you, the average selling price of a house in my neighborhood is in the $500,000.00 plus area. Ya know, he's the type that his poop doesn't stink.

I love these stories, keep 'em coming!