Taking your spouse to a school reunion

[SydSim]

DH has a HS reunion coming up. As much as I love to go out to parties with him, since we didn't grow up in the same area, I probably won't know anyone. I don't have any problem at all with him going without me. It's a mega reunion (several different classes), so both his brother and sister are going.

I want him to be able to be free to roam around and reconnect with old friends, without worrying about having to make sure that I'm entertained (if he wants to have long conversations).

I went to my reunion years ago. It was an all girls school and I didn't take DH. Most of the ladies who attended came alone, and the few men that were there looked a little lost and neglected.

What was everyone else's experience?

 

[Disney Ella]

I went to one of DH's reunions. It was nice, but I didn't know anyone and couldn't appreciate the stories about Mr. Whoever's math class or the prom, since I wasn't there at the time. I think it would be nicer for my DH to go to future reunions alone for the reasons you mentioned.

 

[kacaju]

I went to dh's 25 year reunion 5 years ago. It was nice to meet everyone, and at the same time very boring. I refused to go to his 30th this year. Dh went by himself and had fun. He did want me to go. He came home and said that 70% came alone this time!

 

[Disney Doll]

I went to one of DH's reunions. It was OK, but I felt a little like a wallflower or a fish out of water because he was running around gabbing and I would just stand there and smile. He was great about trying to include me and introduce me and so forth, but since I didn't go to the school and and didn't know the players and didn't have the memories, it was a little boring.

If he ever wanted to go to another one, I'd probably tell him to go with his buddies and enjoy himself.

 

[punkin]

DH and I went to the same high school so I went to his 25th this year. There were some people I knew so it was not that bad. I had an OK time and DH had an absolute ball.

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

I recently had my reunion and asked DH if he wanted to go. He didn't, so I went alone. I had an okay time. If he were to ask me to go to his, I would, but I definetely would not offer ahead of time.

 

[MichelleinMaine]

DH doesn't want to go to his own class reunions, much less mine. We recently had our 20th and I'd say 2/3 did not bring spouses.

 

[ilovejack02]

I have gone to one of Dh's reunions, very small school, very small town only about 30 of us total at party. I was the only outsider, everyone was very nice and included me, but I was a bit bored .
They have started a yearly get together, and the group is getting bigger including the grade above and below. This year I sent him on his way with a kiss and a hug. He had a ball, didnt have to keep up with me and said everyone asked about me.
We have now been back in his hometown for 3 years and I am meeting more people. I may attend the next one.

DH doesnt know one person I graduated with and I had a HUGE class. No way am I dragging him to that if he doesn't want to go. I have a feeling he will stay home.

 

[Pakey]

DH and I did not attend same schools. I've never attended any of my reunions (40th is the next one). DH, if he wants to, goes to his alone. I think he's went to 2 in all the years we've been married.

 

[DawnCt1]

I have done both. DH comes when he is available, he came to the last. Another reunion I had, he was gone, so I went by myself. I don't mind going with him to his or without him to mine. Its whatever works at the time. I would prefer to go with him because I like to go out. I am not shy so I can talk to the other wall flowers. There are always some.

 

[tazdev3225]

I have gone to my DH's and he has gone to my reunions. We went to the same school but were 2 years apart. I swear he knew more people than I did at my reunion. He is naturally outgoing and has a great time. I am a little more reserved but still have fun because I am a people watcher. The only time I went to his that was a little weird was years ago. His classmates kept coming up to me and asked me if I used to be so-and-so's sister, as my brother graduated with DH. I told them that the last time I checked I still was.

 

[ckay87]

I really prefer to attend my reunions without DH and I really REALLY prefer not to attend his. So that's the way it's been and everyone has been happy and has had fun.

 

[NMAmy]

DH went to my 20th with me and had a good time. We meet a couple of my very best friends from high school several times a year for dinner so he had people he knew quite well.

I've never had to go to one of his because he went to school in England, the school has been torn down, and he's never heard of them having a reunion.

 

[DMickey28]

DH's 10 year was only about a year after we met. I did not go to that with him. His 15 year, he did not go to because we lived in Florida at the time but I probably would have gone with him to that one. Many of his HS friends are all still friends in a group and I have met them many times. Now that we live back in the area we do see them a lot more often so I'd probably enjoy going now.

 

[Mom-to-2-Princesses]

We live too far away to go to my husbands, but he does come to mine. I think he has more fun than I do sometimes! He brings a deck of cards and gets the other "non-reunioners" together for poker or other card games. Their table is always laughing and having a great time.

 

[tinkerdorabelle]

I really prefer to attend my reunions without DH and I really REALLY prefer not to attend his. So that's the way it's been and everyone has been happy and has had fun.

I wish I did that. I just went to one of mine a month or so back, the first one I ever attended, and I really feel my DH felt a little out of place. It was such a blast, everyone was so nice and complimentary, etc. and I had usually avoided them, just didn't feel like going and I was so happy I went. I didn't feel as free to be myself and talk about the past experiences bc of worrying he would feel out of place or uncomfortable. Next time I'm going to try to go without him. lol.

 

[JoanGirardi]

My husband and I went to each other's 30 year reunions this year and we both had a pretty good time. I talked to some of the other spouses at his, and mine was a group thing where he was comfortable enough for the most part. I grew up in Louisiana and he's from New York, so they kept trying to make the Yankee an honorary Cajun. Neither of us is super outgoing, so we appreciated having our safe haven of each other when we were between conversations with old classmates. I say if your spouse wants to go with you, they'll manage to have fun, but if they'd rather not, go alone and you'll have a good time too.

 

[luvmy3]

I went to dh's 10 year reunion but not his 20th. I knew a few people there so it wasn't so bad but I just didn't want to go to his most recent one. He didn't care.

 

[AKL_Megs]

My DH's and my 10 Year Reunion is just around the corner... we were high school sweethearts (different high schools), so I know most of his old friends. I will NEVER go to mine, but I am sure he will want to go to his. This post just reminded me how much I dread it! I hated high school. UGH!!!

Hope you have fun!

 

[Deb in IA]

DH and I grew up 100+ miles away from each other, so we didn't go to the same high school. They weren't even in the same athletic conference, so they didn't really have anything in common.

But I have gone to each of my DH's reunions since his 10 year one, including the last one, in 2006, which was his 30th. He's kept in touch with a small number of his high school friends - mostly his football, wresting, and rock band buddies - and I've gotten to know them also.

Likewise, DH's has come to all of my HS reunions as well. He doesn't know quite as many of my classmates, but knows enough to be comfortable.

We enjoy the reunions and like to catch up with folks.