Taking kids out of school for vacation

[Agent J]

I don't think there is any perfect approach but we have found it works for our family to spend an extended amount of time together - work and school keep us very busy during the year and we have taken our son out of school for long vacations from kindergarten to Grade 8 (currently) - he isn't the greatest student and struggles with ADHD and social skills but his teachers are very supportive and see this as an alternative learning opportunity for him - the improvement to his social skills and other exposure he gets on these trips is very beneficial - when he was younger he would do a "trip report" type of assignment and math and language sheets. In older grades their work is on Google Classroom so he is able to log on and keep up with a lot of the work - yes, he misses the in-class instruction but honestly, his grades would likely not be better even if he was there - the one on one time we have with him to go over his lessons a bit each day on vacation actually seems to help him improve - this is the last year we plan on a big trip as he heads to high school next year and it will be harder for him to keep up/catch up but i wouldn't trade our time together for anything and the travel has had a huge impact on his world view - we have sailed 5 transatlantic and 3 panama canal cruises during the school year (he has visited Spain, Portugal, Italy, the Canary Islands, France, UK, Denmark, Norway, Iceland, The Netherlands, Mexico, USA (including Hawaii), Columbia, Aruba, Costa Rica as well as other Canadian Maritime Provinces) - we have cruised primarily in May or over a time when there are some school holidays to minimize the impact. If it works for you and you are comfortable, do what is best for your family.

 

[MikeMontrealer]

It's not something I'd make a habit of, but for our first cruise in February 2021 we'll be pulling out kids out for a week (Grades 5, 3 and K). It's the week after the second term ends so shouldn't be too difficult to work around, and we do a lot of work keeping them on track already so we're willing to accept that responsibility. We can also catch up on March Break and the kids (well, the older ones) are fully aware of that requirement.

I did ask several local teachers and they told me to go ahead if it's a special trip (don't just pull them out for a day trip to a movie, for instance), and this definitely qualifies. We did struggle with the question for a few weeks but we feel what they'll gain in family time and seeing new places (and enjoying what we hope is a trip of a lifetime) will make up for it.

 

[DCSWO]

We pulled them out occasionally when the kids were young (elementary school), and with enthusiastic teacher support in most cases. Once they hit junior high/high school, I think the academic pressure is too much. Our youngest is in high school now and they are only allowed to miss 4 “A“ days and 4 “B” days during the entire school year so it is not an option now. DW and I are doing our next DCL trip without kids due to the limited itinerary dates and school schedule - much to DD’s disappointment.

 

[mevelandry]

Regarding this:

Would you take a younger elementary aged kid (2nd grade) out of school for a cruise if you felt it was significantly better for your family financially? How many people do this?

And this:

(...)

My mother passed away unexpectedly at age 55. It kills me to think of the vacations she had delayed until “after retirement” and then she never retired. I’m not saying you should be irresponsible, but life is short. Live a little.

(...)

Experienced almost the same thing with my own mother (same age, same situation, except it was cancer).

I agree 100%.

Be smart but remember that YOLO.

 

[FigmentSpark]

With regards to a day trip thing... when my guys were in primary school (young elementary), once a year we would do something that took them out, but it was always educational, like the museum or the science center. It just gave them a different view of things they were likely studying anyway or at least would be studying. But otherwise, no day trips for movies unless it was educationally important.

 

[MikeMontrealer]

With regards to a day trip thing... when my guys were in primary school (young elementary), once a year we would do something that took them out, but it was always educational, like the museum or the science center. It just gave them a different view of things they were likely studying anyway or at least would be studying. But otherwise, no day trips for movies unless it was educationally important.

Agreed! I meant to see the newest Marvel movie or something like that.

 

[smmco]

There all kinds of reasons parents might do this and it’s not always financial. I work in a women dominated field. Everyone wants Spring and Fall break off wether their vacationing or not. We cannot take time off during Holiday season. That leaves about 2 months in the Summer when everyone’s competing for time off. My husbands job everything is done by seniority so well depending on where you are on the list....you get the picture.
All I know is when I cruise there’s always a lot of kids onboard. Even our transatlantic in September there were 40 high schoolers. Honestly Ive never given it much thought. It’s not my place to judge what people do. I don’t know their family situation.

I would say just do what works for you and don’t worry about what other people think. If you do pull your kids out of school you certainly won’t be alone.

 

[MinnesotaMouseketeers]

We took our son out of school several times for a cruise up until his Jr. year. But it was for only three days, there was one week in October and one in November (not Thanksgiving week) that had both Thursday and Friday off so we went during one of those weeks. We had to have each teacher sign a sheet approving the days off a few weeks in advance of the vacation. Some had him do some extra homework before he left, some had him do some during the vacation and some waited until he got back to complete it. Or a combination of the three. It was never a problem for him and his teachers were always very nice about it.

 

[hcox31]

Elementary Teacher here. What a elementary aged child would miss over the course of the week is negligible. What they would gain is travel experience and priceless family memories. Just don't ask for homework from the teacher. I work in a district that parents pull their kids to travel "home" for a month or more. THAT is a huge hinderance. A week is not in my opinion. High school is different all together.

Heck, if I was allowed to take time off during the year I would totally pull my own kids out for a family vacation for a week.

 

[Lynn CC]

My son is grown with his own children now. I took him out of school every year from k-8th grade for a family vacation. Sometimes he missed 5 school days, sometimes 8.
It was totally worth the memories.

He went to college & graduate school has a wonderful job, supports his 3 boys & another on the way, his wife is a stay at home mom.
I don’t think they would take my grandchildren out of school though. They are very serious about school attendance, different school district.
It wasn’t like that when my son was in school.
I’d say do it if it feels right for your family.

 

[Spiffy MacSpiff]

We can't, because my husband is a school psychologist and his contract doesn't allow for vacation time when school is in session. If we could, though, we would, without reservation. Both of our boys are high honors students who wouldn't fall behind during a week or two of travel, and they'd experience so much more than they ever would in a classroom. If one or both of them was struggling to keep up with everyday work, though, travel wouldn't be a consideration for us.

 

[Lisa F]

the notion that you are teaching your kids to shirk responsibilities if you take them out of school is ridiculous. Kids learn the lesson YOU teach them... so if you value family time and travel, that is NOT the same as shirking responsibilities. The lesson is not automatically that school is not important. Just that "working" is not the most important thing in the whole world and you can be proactive about meeting your obligations even if you're not at school.

That said, you also have to know your own kid. Before grades were "real" in K-4 I had no problem taking my son out of school and it was with the blessings of all of his teachers. In 5th grade we still had the blessing but he has real grades now and although he had high honors the whole year, missing a whole week of work caused a lot of stress. He is on the spectrum and has anxiety and a couple of missed assignments until made up brought his grade in one class down to an 88 and it was pretty rough. I am pulling him out for the 2 days before February break this year but I know they don't do a whole lot those two days and he won't miss much, if anything. A whole week is too much though! Know your kid but I would say that mine is a bit like the canary in the coal mine with the anxiety and he had zero problem until grades truly counted and high honors came into play.

 

[MrsInsG]

Agreed! I meant to see the newest Marvel movie or something like that.

To each their own. My husband has pulled our girls for each new Star Wars movie. They go to the midnight showing and either go to a restaurant before or after. This is a special thing between him and the girls. I can guarantee they would not remember whatever particular lesson was taught on the day of school they miss, but I am just as sure that one day they will tell their kids (or grandkids) about how it felt to go to IHOP for pancakes at 3 am with Daddy after getting to see a movie at midnight.

I teach and absenteeism is a problem. However, there's a difference between kids who are chronically absent because they simply stay home and those who are at school the vast majority of the time. I have no problem catching up the kids who miss sometimes, and I would rather they spend special time with their parents. Heck, I teach language arts; something out of the ordinary gives the kids a great narrative topic!

 

[DietCokeMommy]

We’re going to take my son out of kindergarten in January for 9 days. On one hand in a little nervous about it, it’s not just a day or two, our trip is 2 full weeks and there happens to be one day in there for a holiday. We are also new this year to having a kid in elementary school so I’m not sure how the school will react. I’ve read our school handbook and it’s kind of vague about “excessive absences” and “may” lead to truancy court.

But really, it’s kindergarten. I know everyone talks about how much kindergarten has become so difficult, but my son seems to spend most of his day coloring and playing (which I am totally ok with). Right now they’re learning about shapes and letters and numbers. Stuff he pretty much already knows.

 

[daisyx3]

I'm a teacher in HS and I took my own kids out for a day or two a few times--they are in a different district that like to have a "spring break" around last week of March, while mine is based around when Easter is. If we were one week after the other, I'd take an unpaid day and take them out for 1 or 2 days to cobble together a vacation. Unfortunately when they were in HS two days was the max they could miss a semester if they wanted to opt out of an exam and I was very careful to do that.
Trust me, some years if Easter was late they would have a week off, we would both be in school the next week, and then I would be off while they were in school. Drove me nuts.
BTW, our band goes to WDW every four years. They always go the week before or after spring break! So the staff has to get all of their homework ready, even though half of them won't do it, LOL.

 

[Kennywood]

When I was in elementary school, I came home to find my family sitting around the dining room table. That wasn't terribly odd but it was a little unusual at that time of day. My parents told me that we were leaving for Florida tomorrow and would be going to Disney World. I don't know why but I didn't believe them. Perhaps it was the fact that we were supposed to be leaving so quickly. I said something like, "Oh, sure......right....". My parents assured me that we were indeed leaving the next day. For some reason, that cause me to doubt it even more. (Hey....I was a weird kid, okay? Lol). Finally, my mom said, "Look, we're leaving for Florida in the morning. If you want to go, you'd better get up when I call you." This was going beyond the usual joking and kidding we usually did, so I said, "Really? We're going to Disney World?" For years afterward, my family would tease me about not believing them.

Anyway, they took me out of school for a week for the trip. I was a straight A student and the teacher assured my parents that the trip wouldn't affect my education or my grades. So, off we went.

I guess the answer to whether or not a child should be removed from school for a trip is whether or not the child's grades are good enough to not be affected by the trip. Every child, family, and trip are unique.

 

[celina14]

We are doing it in February to go on our first cruise. My daughter is also in 2nd grade. She does very well in school so I'm not that worried about it. We did plan it during a time when they have a couple days off anyway so it's not as many days.

 

[ChicosWife]

We personally never did it. I know all the teachers/principals we've had have been very much against it. I never really had a problem with them taking that stance - with one caveat. If, as teachers/principals, you are so against parents taking kids out of school for vacations (WDW, DCL, or where ever), then it should be mandated at the school that there is to be no work of any kind given over the various breaks. If teachers are assigning all kinds of work for the kids to do over Xmas break, February break or Easter/Spring break...then why should parents wait for those breaks and pay the substantial premiums that come with it? It's not really a break then, and is not all that different from taking them out during a school week.

I never thought of this, but excellent point!!!

 

[tankin]

My wife is teacher so I may have a slightly different view than most. Given the stress that school districts (at least locally) and, therefore, teachers are under to get students to perform I can understand most teachers and administrators are against this.

Here's my take, if you're willing to take the time to reteach your student everything they miss and don't expect the classroom teacher to do it, go for it. Just understand that your child may have long term consequences (3rd grade reading guarantee comes to mind, poor GPA for HS students, etc) if they are unable to learn the material.

 

[ChicosWife]

My wife is teacher so I may have a slightly different view than most. Given the stress that school districts (at least locally) and, therefore, teachers are under to get students to perform I can understand most teachers and administrators are against this.

Here's my take, if you're willing to take the time to reteach your student everything they miss and don't expect the classroom teacher to do it, go for it. Just understand that your child may have long term consequences (3rd grade reading guarantee comes to mind, poor GPA for HS students, etc) if they are unable to learn the material.

I am not saying that school isn't important, but no one's future has been reported as ruined by their parents taking them out for a week, for a Disney cruise. J/S.