Taking food from 1 restaurant to another for your child - okay?

[pjlla]

I haven't read all of the replies, yet, but I'm chiming in here. We do that when we go to Boston Market. DS (just turned 8) really doesn't like anything there, but the rest of us really like the food. So we usually stop at McDonald's on the way over and pick up a Happy Meal for DS. Everyone is happy. And since that is not a table service restaurant, I am not offending any waitresses. I've never had anyone say anything. But we have never done it at a regular table service restaurant.....................P

 

[inaminute]

Haven't read the entire thread, but based on the info given by the OP, my initial reaction would have been that the child may have had allergies to seafood--chicken fingers may have been cooked in the same oil as seafood. It also sounds like Mom was out with friends or family and may not have had a lot of say in the matter of where they were dining. If there was no one to sit for Junior, what else could she do?

My second thought would have been a reminder to myself that I really have no reason to be concerned about it. As long as no one was hurting me or mine, it's none of my business.

 

[PatriciaH]

I don't think little kids should be eating McDonalds anyway but that is whole other can of worms. I'll side with tacky. I also think "childrens menu" chicken fingers and fries at nice restaurants are tacky too though. Lets just shovel the worst junk you can into them. How about veggies and dip? Salad? A small steak? Chicken salad with celery? Hard boiled eggs? Children's menus are disgusting

 

[Planogirl]

I'm not enthused with nuggets and fries either but as an occasional treat, I see nothing wrong with it. I don't allow such food in my house but at restaurants all bets are off.

 

[Jockaroo]

We didn't eat out very often when I was growing up, but my mother always had me eat something from the restaurant. I was a semi-picky eater, but always could find something--typically half her entree, as I left my meal sitting! I have a great mama.

I do see parents bring outside food into certain restaurants in my area. It tends to be Mexican and the fish camp style restaurants. One of my favorite Mexian restaurants in the past posted a sign that stated "No outside food, except children's meals." Families would come in with their kid's Happy Meals and the wait staff would still fuss over the children, bringing them small bowls of queso dip and salsa to try with their fries, or offering them "squishy beans." I don't have kids, but feel this was a nice gesture on the part of the restaurant staff.

What I did find tacky recently was an 11-12 year old boy whose family brought in a full-size pizza to a very popular cafeteria. It was extremely crowded, but the boy sat at a table for 4-6, spread out his pizza box and ate all alone, while elderly patrons were holding their lunch trays looking for tables. Although pizza was not on the menu, the cafeteria did have many child-friendly options available.

 

[Micca]

One evening we were dining at a pretty upscale place and the server ran through a list of specials that all sounded unbelievably mouth-watering. Just as a joke, I made some comment about "can't a guy get a Big Mac around this joint?" and the server said that they had made some Mickey-D's runs for
families with picky kids. Now that's service- can't imagine what you want to tip for that little perk

 

[skiwee1]

We've done it before without a problem. I have a friend who owns a nice restaurant in the city. He can't carry everything under the sun for kids so he is perfectly fine with someone bringing something the child likes but he doesn't provide. As he says, he's much rather have ther family eat at his place rather then avoid it for one child. Since he owns a 4 star restaurant I take his expert opinion over anyone elses! Wanted to add that we have never brought food in from another restaurant. We used to bring pb&j for DD from home. She isn't a chicken finger, hot dog loving kind of a kid!

 

[pooh4evr]

I used to ba an assistant mgr at Chuck E Cheese in college and you would not believe the kinds of things people would bring in for birthday parties- the best were- Crock pots with hot dogs and a few other things, and one time somebody came walking in with a 6 foot subway sandwich!! We had to say no way to those things - when they would ask why it was health code things, (can't specifically remember what) basically there were no outside food ar drinks allowed other than store bought cakes and ice cream. People brought in 2 liters, their own beer...it goes on and on- oH never let your kids play in the ball pits

 

[pearlieq]

For a fast food restaurant, I don't think it's a big deal as long as it's handled discreetly. At a sitdown restaurant it's just tacky. I'm sure everyone can dream up an extenuating circumstance, but most of the time people just do it for their own convenience and I think it's impolite.

 

[RadioNate]

As a mom of a REALLY picky kid I'm torn. I've seen a lot of 'can't your kid eat' things mentioned.

Buttered noodles - nope
Anything grilled - nope
Anything with BBQ sauce - nope
Veggies and dip - no way
Salad - nope
Steak - maybe if it didn't have any charing or grill marks on it
Chicken salad with celery - he would vomit
Hard boiled eggs - maybe

I get very frustrated that just because your child eats it doesn't mean all kids will. It also very frustrating to have a picky kid. A kid who will vomit over a bite of banana or anything with mayonaise or cheese. I LOVE going out to eat. I hate to cook, I'd rather clean my toilets than cook. I despise it. The last thing on earth I want is my DS puking at a restaurant because he is refusing to eat something. So we stick with what we know.

Now that said I can only recall bringing in other food once (I brought soup from the deli next door in to Costco because my inlaws were having hotdogs and my DS won't eat hotdogs) but I've been known to bring in a lot of PB&J sandwiches.

No one has every had a problem with it. DS is happy and I don't have to cook. In an ideal world we'd all have sitters at our beck and call or love cooking gourmet meals at home but life doesn't always work that way.

I have enough on my plate to worry about so I generally don't concern myself with what other people do.

 

[mum4jenn]

We did this a few times when we wanted to eat Mexican food and dd was just a toddler. We also took baby food to restaurants but once she was at the "finger food" stage we did do this but only at the Mexican restaurant. Everyplace else we ate had things she would eat. I remember all she used to eat at Applebees was a baked potato!! But the food at our fav. Mex. rest was spicy and I did not want to upset her stomach. But also it is a very friendly place and one of the managers actually suggested that we do this. We did and they were perfectly ok with it since we still spent lots of money in there. Oh and also we were very discreet when we did this. We never showed the bag around and always disposed of that trash ourselves.This place is now our Dds favorite place to eat and they know her by name since she was a week old the first time we took her in there.

Once she was probably 3-4 years old she started learning to love some of the milder dishes so we never have to do this anymore. Just when she was age 2ish.

 

[DisneyPhD]

If allergies is an issue, I personally would still attempt to avoid a situation where I brought in outside food. I'd either have the child stay with a sitter or be at a friends house, just order take out and eat at home, or I'd call ahead and inquire about the ingrediants and see if there was something on the menu my child could enjoy and not cause a reaction. This saves the hassle of tieing up the poor server with "does this have X in it?" questions and finding out too late that everything on the menu is off limits. I'd only bring in outside food as a last resort, and even then I'd bring food from home (sandwich and chips or whatever) rather than food from a fast food place. It could cause liability problems for the restaurant, and just looks rude (even though it isn't intended to).

My sympathies for anyone that has a child with food allergies, I'm sure it can't be easy. I've had a few close calls with DH and his allergy to cantalope (which until I met him, I'd never heard of!), and he's an adult! It must be a million times harder with kids!

I am rather suprized by this because your DH has food allergies, but melons are pretty easy to avoid. However as you should know there is no cheating on food allergy diets unlike other diets. You live with this 24 /7. I am sorry but I don't get a baby sitter too often and we go out to eat with my child. If we want to eat in a restuarnt and do so, as hard as it can be. Do you have any idea how old it gets calling ahead and asking what you can eat? As much as it is hasleing the sever, do you have any idea what a hassel it is to be the person who has to do it? Oh my to just eat food with out questionsing what is in? What a luxury! Do you know how hard it is to find food that is safe to eat? Reading every label before it touches your mouth or you childs? Wacthing your kid cry when others get treats they want to eat but can't? I try to plan ahead and always have some treats she can eat when she is offered something she can't, but it isn't easy. She can't have birthday cake at parties, cookies. No desserts in any resturant. It is not an easy life.

I must say I have never bought outside food from other places into a restuarnt. I do always have a can of peaches, sometimes lunch meat or noodles in my bag along with safe crackers. However this child currenlty spends all day telling me she wants to eat, and refused everything offered to her. My point is food allergies is a major pain, it effects you 24/7 and you can't just not go out to eat. You can't get a sitter or leave her with others just because you want to eat with out worring about it. You have to live your life.

However I see no point in judging others, how does this help anyone. It doesn't make you feel better so why do it?

 

[Chicago526]

I am rather suprized by this because your DH has food allergies, but melons are pretty easy to avoid. However as you should know there is no cheating on food allergy diets unlike other diets. You live with this 24 /7. I am sorry but I don't get a baby sitter too often and we go out to eat with my child. If we want to eat in a restuarnt and do so, as hard as it can be. Do you have any idea how old it gets calling ahead and asking what you can eat? As much as it is hasleing the sever, do you have any idea what a hassel it is to be the person who has to do it? Oh my to just eat food with out questionsing what is in? What a luxury! Do you know how hard it is to find food that is safe to eat? Reading every label before it touches your mouth or you childs? Wacthing your kid cry when others get treats they want to eat but can't? I try to plan ahead and always have some treats she can eat when she is offered something she can't, but it isn't easy. She can't have birthday cake at parties, cookies. No desserts in any resturant. It is not an easy life.

I must say I have never bought outside food from other places into a restuarnt. I do always have a can of peaches, sometimes lunch meat or noodles in my bag along with safe crackers. However this child currenlty spends all day telling me she wants to eat, and refused everything offered to her. My point is food allergies is a major pain, it effects you 24/7 and you can't just not go out to eat. You can't get a sitter or leave her with others just because you want to eat with out worring about it. You have to live your life.

However I see no point in judging others, how does this help anyone. It doesn't make you feel better so why do it?

All I said was that in the case of a food allergy, I'd try to avoid it at all costs (and gave examples of how it may be avoided), and if not avoidable (which is not only possible, but likely to happen at some point or another), I'd bring food from home rather than a differant restaurant. I don't see how that is judgemental of people with food allergies, but okay, whatever floats your boat. I was being judgemental of those who bring in food for kids that are just picky, but since that isn't your situation, I don't understand why you would care.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I was being judgemental of those who bring in food for kids that are just picky, but since that isn't your situation, I don't understand why you would care.

But why be judgemental at all for something that doesn't affect you? I can see if you are judgemental towards someone who smokes in a restaurant when it's not allowed since that affects you--you have to breathe in the smoke. Or someone who talks loudly throughout a meal on a cell phone (or not on a cell) since you have to then listen to a loud conversation. Or someone who lets their kids run wild in the restaurant because it disturbs your dining experience. Judge the things that affect you. Now if you want to point out that you personally wouldn't bring food it, the reasons why, and how you would handle certain situations, that's fine, but judging others is a different thing.

Let the restaurants decide how to handle people bringing food in. Some might look at it as $ that they are losing by those people not buying a kids meal, but most will look at it as making $ since those people are in their restaurant buying most of their food. But regardless, it's the restaurant's decision how they will handle it.

 

[goodeats]

But why be judgemental at all for something that doesn't affect you?

Because it signifies the general decline of our society. So in that, it does affect me. For instance, I see a mom give in to a tantrum throwing brat at Target. Yes, I'm going to judge her. Does it affect me directly? Not really. But in 20 years when this entitled brat is working under me (or whomever he is working under), it's certainly going to affect society.

I think it's a big load of hooey that people think people shouldn't judge other people. We make judgements every single day! And if you say you don't, I think you're lying. Or at least not admitting it to yourself.

ETA - The subject of the thread was, Do you think it's OK? People are just giving their replies. Personally, no I don't think it's OK.

 

[CEDmom]

Because it signifies the general decline of our society. So in that, it does affect me. For instance, I see a mom give in to a tantrum throwing brat at Target. Yes, I'm going to judge her. Does it affect me directly? Not really. But in 20 years when this entitled brat is working under me (or whomever he is working under), it's certainly going to affect society.

I think it's a big load of hooey that people think people shouldn't judge other people. We make judgements every single day! And if you say you don't, I think you're lying.

I said way back on page 1 that I wouldn't do this with my child but that's mostly because I can get something she enjoys when we go out. However, if I saw someone do it I wouldn't give it much thought. BTW, I think it's a far stretch to go from bringing McDonalds into another restaurant to the downfall of our society. Ensuring your child has something they like to eat while you're enjoying your meal is not in itself creating a brat.

 

[Southern4sure]

Well, I'm guilty. I have done this twice to the same restaurant...Chinese. My boys are not picky eaters (never have been) and they love to eat. This particular Chinese rest., we were regular patrons (before we moved) almost weekly since DS#1 was 8 yrs old. One day we were going to eat there and DS#2 didnt want to eat Chinese. He wanted Burger King. So I bought him his meal and took it into the Chinese rest. and he was 7 yrs old! The rest. was fine with it. I did not feel like we were cheating the rest. or short changing the waitress. We certainly were not taking up the space of "paying customers" since we did purchase 3 adult meals (DS#1 was considered an adult, he was 13).

We tipped like we always do and no harm came to anyone except maybe to the patron scrutinizing us for bring in Burger King!....

 

[Nancy]

As a mom of a REALLY picky kid I'm torn. I've seen a lot of 'can't your kid eat' things mentioned.

Buttered noodles - nope
Anything grilled - nope
Anything with BBQ sauce - nope
Veggies and dip - no way
Salad - nope
Steak - maybe if it didn't have any charing or grill marks on it
Chicken salad with celery - he would vomit
Hard boiled eggs - maybe

I get very frustrated that just because your child eats it doesn't mean all kids will. It also very frustrating to have a picky kid. A kid who will vomit over a bite of banana or anything with mayonaise or cheese. I LOVE going out to eat. I hate to cook, I'd rather clean my toilets than cook. I despise it. The last thing on earth I want is my DS puking at a restaurant because he is refusing to eat something. So we stick with what we know.

Now that said I can only recall bringing in other food once (I brought soup from the deli next door in to Costco because my inlaws were having hotdogs and my DS won't eat hotdogs) but I've been known to bring in a lot of PB&J sandwiches.

No one has every had a problem with it. DS is happy and I don't have to cook. In an ideal world we'd all have sitters at our beck and call or love cooking gourmet meals at home but life doesn't always work that way.

I have enough on my plate to worry about so I generally don't concern myself with what other people do.

Yep it would be nice if we all had perfect kids that would eat those foods! My kids are great eaters now that they are in their teens, but when they were toddlers??? OH my! They could "love" something for weeks and then turn their nose up at it the next day. MY youngest will not touch grilled cheese sandwiches, PB and J or melted cheese on pizza. But she will eat mayo sandwiches and ketchup sandwiches She will also eat chicken caeser salads and chinese food. My 2 older will try anything...and I mean anything (I am actually the picky eater in our family) My oldest went through her not eating meat faze, no turkey, chicken or beef...so we learned to cook and eat different things with her. She will now eat chicken and turkey again but she has not had red meat since she was 6 years old. (her choice). My middle DD will not eat pasta of any kind unless she has no choice..like nothing else to eat. But she eats lobster, steamed clams, and mushrooms stuffed with crab meat. None of these kids got their food tastes from me or their Dad.

So back to the OP...I never brought in food from another rest. but I did bring in stuff from home. Sometimes it was just finger food, other times it was a sandwich. We could usually find something on the menu to order for them...even if it was just french fries.

 

[JoBird]

Yes, I do take fast food into another restaurant for my almost 4 year old who does not have food allergies. Why? Because she is the pickiest eater on the face of the earth. Always has been; I have video of her picking green beans out of her food and throwing them on the floor at 10 months old. She never ate baby food...I have dealt with this since she was able to eat. I wish she wasn't so picky. It worries me to death that she will eat no vegetables, no fruit. The only meat she will eat are Arby's roast beef sandwiches or a chic fil a sandwich.
On a typical day, for breakfast she eats DRY toast (has said "no bubber" since she could talk) and a carton of yogurt, as long as it has no fruit in it.
For lunch, it's mac n cheese (only kraft, nothing else).
For dinner, EVERY night, it's scrambled eggs. Always the same. Never changes. So for me to finally get something in her that is meat, even if it is fast food, I am dancing. When we go out to dinner, we pick up a sandwich and take it with us to the restaurant of choice.
For someone who has never had a picky child, please don't say "you would never..." because you don't know what you'd do in a situation you've, thankfully, never had to deal with.
And please don't say that I am just trying to pacify a child. I have tried being adamant that she eat what everyone else eats. On the third day of her eating NOTHING and her becoming listless, I gave in.
At least I am not abusing her by making her eat what she does not want. There are too many people who are scarred, emotionally, by their parents demanding that the child eat something they are repulsed by.
If my bringing in a bag of food for my child bothers you, then when you own your own restaurant, you can tell me to leave. Until then, I will bring in food for my child and watch her munch along happily, while the other kids in the restaurant yell and scream and make the other patrons, including me, miserable.
Oh, and by the way, if an establishment is concerned about losing money on a $4.99 child's meal, they are already in a world of trouble, financially.
PS>>> We always tip 20-30% regardless of if the service was good, bad or otherwise, even if we are dining with or without the children.

 

[RadioNate]

JoBird - your DD sounds exactly like my DS. We've gone the 3 days without eating anything too. It is so scary, I swear he'd let him self starve before he'd eat something he doesn't like.

The good news is that at nearly 5 he is starting to try new things. Now often he spits them out but he's doing better. If course he did vomit at a taste of strawberry yogurt the other day.