Spin off- Vow Renewal?

[java]

Clearly I don't get this. Why the sudden surge in vow renewal. I can see people that maybe didn't get the big party originally wanting to do it up big. But those that already had a wedding. I just don't understand why you would want a vow renewal.
Now I may be biased as the only 3 people that I knew that did vow renewal ended up getting divorced.

So if you have had a vow renewal- why did you do it? I really would like to understand it. Maybe I am missing some magical answer? We have been married 20 years. And I'm all for celebrating our anniversary with a big trip or something but I don't ever feel the need to announce that I chose my husband again. I do that everyday.

 

[JESW]

I don't get it either but to each their own. I said "I Do" once almost 23 years ago and that hasn't changed so why do it again??

I think of Jon & Kate spending all that money (probably TLC's) to go to Hawaii to renew their vows and look at them now!

Dh & I don't usually make a big deal out of our anniversary either except to go out to eat - and we usually bring the kids. We also don't go away without our kids but that is our choice. Our anniversary is in June so there have been a couple of times we were all at Disney and that was fun.

Whatever floats your boat...

Jill

 

[Hillbeans]

I'm not a fan of VR's either, especially the celebrity ones some have every year they are married.

 

[sunnyday123]

My thought is if you have to renew them, they weren't going that great. I always thought it was a personal thing between the couple if after having some issues, they worked through them and wanted to have a ceremony.

Now I just think it's about the attention.

 

[PaulaSue]

LOL, your post remindes me of Kate and Jon plus 8. Looked what happened after theirs.....

 

[KerriSue]

I dont get them either! It seems to me that when people have vow renewals that they are doing it to prove something.

I have a ton of opinions that I keep deleting, lets just leave it at they are a waste of money!

 

[4greatboys]

I'm not sure about a sudden surge. When my husband and I married 11 years ago I thought then it would be nice to do that maybe for our 15th or 20th anniversary. So when we do have one it wont be sudden it will be something I have thought about for many years. Could also be the case for many others.

 

[Nancyg56]

I have to disagree that the VR is for attention. DH and I have been married almost 18 years. Throughout that time we have had plenty of challenges as well as many blessed events. I know that I would love to renew our vows at 20 years, I would celebrate and invite family and friends who have shared the past years with us. Our vows have never faltered and we would remain as committed to one another as we have ever been but I think celebrating our Sacrament and having our Marraige Blessed once again is a joyous occasion. I do not think that it is appropriate for everyone, in fact I am not sure my DH would feel comfortable with this, but if a couple wants to celebrate this way there is no harm to anyone.

We'll see what DH has to say next year

 

[quentina]

I always wanted to elope to a beach and get married at sunset, bare feet....only the minister and the birds present. MyDH's parents made sure that this was not allowed.

Instead.....I had a $25,000 mega wedding in 1994. To this day, it still annoys me that all that money was spent for a few hours.

My DH promised me that he would give me "my dream" on our 5 year anniversary. Well....at that point, we are deep into fertility treatments and it was not possible.

We thought about doing one last year (just us and our kids).....truly, I just can't justify the expense.

No matter what we are married....I would not do a renewal UNLESS, I had the $$$$ to pay for everyone. Under no circumstance would I invite someone and ask them to foot the bill. Personally, I would not attend a renewal at a destination unless the couple was paying or putting a large amount towards it.

 

[Silent1CB]

We were invited to a local one last year. Really didn't want to go but sort of had to.

I don't get them either. If it were somewhere that required traveling for us, we would not have attended.

 

[Magic Mom]

I can understand a small ceremony for just the couple and maybe their kids or parents, but not a big destination vow renewal, especially inviting extended family. But some people really crave that attention I guess.

 

[powellrj]

I understand wanting to renew your vows with your DH, but why in the world do you feel the need to invite other people????? Everyones lives are busy enough.

We have been married over 30 years and trust me, anyone who has been married that long has had some really good years and many years that they were ready to call it quits. I think its something for just you and your DH to celebrate, and not have to make a show for other people.

 

[Cornhusk]

I think that a vow renewal at 25+ years is fine. 10 years though...not so much. It also gets me when people have a renewal after 5 years, what is the point?

 

[Silent1CB]

I understand wanting to renew your vows with your DH, but why in the world do you feel the need to invite other people????? Everyones lives are busy enough.

We have been married over 30 years and trust me, anyone who has been married that long has had some really good years and many years that they were ready to call it quits. I think its something for just you and your DH to celebrate, and not have to make a show for other people.

 

[MIGrandma]

I agree with those who don't feel the need for them.

I took my vows seriously 34 years ago, why do I need to "renew" them?

I guess I can see them a little more for a 25th or 50th anniversary, if you're already planning a big celebration party for that then maybe...but really I doubt if DH and I would do it even then. We're not "party people" though. For our 25th we had dinner at one of the most elegant restaurants in the area, and had our adult children there to celebrate it with, spent the night at a lovely B&B and then a few months later went on a cruise. To us, that was much better than a vow renewal ceremony.

 

[Cornhusk]

I agree with those who don't feel the need for them.

I took my vows seriously 34 years ago, why do I need to "renew" them?

I guess I can see them a little more for a 25th or 50th anniversary, if you're already planning a big celebration party for that then maybe...but really I doubt if DH and I would do it even then. We're not "party people" though. For our 25th we had dinner at one of the most elegant restaurants in the area, and had our adult children there to celebrate it with, spent the night at a lovely B&B and then a few months later went on a cruise. To us, that was much better than a vow renewal ceremony.

I also don't get the term "renewal" did the marriage license expire?

 

[Ember]

I think people enjoy the excitement of all parts of wedding planning. A dress, a special day, attention, etc. They want to re-live their wedding. I'm not a huge fan of vow renewals, but so long as it isn't a gift grab opportunity I have no real problem with them. (A while back I got an invite to a 5 year vow renewal with registry information. ) I think they're more meaningful with it's just the couple, rather than a spectacle, but to each their own.

DH has mentioned a renewal as our entire marriage so far has been tear filled. First he was gone for two years, then both his grandparents died suddenly, and then we we've been dealing with my mum's cancer since June. It has literally been one thing after another. I'm not sure we'll ever do it (I'm in the "I said my vows and meant them" category) but it seems important to him so we may... If we did it would be just the two of us somewhere quiet. No party, no event, just a reaffirmation that we're okay as a couple in spite of the last three years.

 

[crz4mm2]

We wanted to. It was DH's idea. He wanted to do it on our 25th anniversary. I thought it was VERY silly at that time. Fast forward 5 years and we had our renewal with our kids and my BFF and her DH. It was wonderful.
We did ours on a cruise. It was great.

We didn't do it for anyone else, just for us Sure was nice to have the kids and BFF there though!

 

[PixieTopaz]

I understand wanting to renew your vows with your DH, but why in the world do you feel the need to invite other people????? Everyones lives are busy enough.

.

I agree

I think the Bridezilla factor in the last few years on TV and Disney weddings has gotten some women who misssed all that nonsence wanting their day in the sun.

 

[Disneyglobegirl]

I understand wanting to renew your vows with your DH, but why in the world do you feel the need to invite other people????? Everyones lives are busy enough.

We have been married over 30 years and trust me, anyone who has been married that long has had some really good years and many years that they were ready to call it quits. I think its something for just you and your DH to celebrate, and not have to make a show for other people.

I agree with this too I realize that having a vow renewal is important to some people and that is fine but I don't understand this idea that the whole world has to celebrate your special date with you. It just seems that it is another "me me me" thing when a huge event is planned for a VR.

DH and I will be celebrating our 20th this year with a mediterranean cruise and the last thing I want is family and friends tagging along