Spin off... if your child gifted?

[jenrose66]

is that directed at me? I dont assume anyone is lying.. I'd really LOVE to hear about what other kids have been able to do in their short lives... I dont think I know any really gifted kids around me... It seems there are a ton here.. How did you know they were gifted? ppl talk about them being tested what kind of test is it? how do you go and ask for it at school? I honest to god want to know.. My dd8 is smart... gifted? I dunno.. how do I go about finding out?

My son was labeled at gifted this past may. He is quirky and socially awkward so he received evaluations by a psychologist, regular teacher, speech teacher, special ed teacher, occupational therapist, and physical therapist. That's an awful lot of evaluations!!! I don't agree with them but that's what schools do now a days.

Anyway....he took some type of test with the psychologist and maxed out all the questions, he got everyone right and she said this test was for students up to 8 years old. She says that she's never seen that (and has been working in her field for over 20 years) and that there's no telling how much further he could have gone. They came to the conclusion that he has trouble socially because he has trouble identifying with kids his own age because he's an old soul.

Personally I wondered if we should just skip him a grade or two to keep him stimulated in class and the evaluators said that would be up to me and the principal of the school, however DH is adamantly against him skipping grades. Anyway...they decided to give him group therapy to help him learn how to be more socially appropriate.

So anyway, not sure if this post was sarcastic or not but I'll share with you some stuff about my son in case you were truly curious. He can read on his own pretty good, not just memorization, I can give him a book he's never seen and he can read it to me for the most part. He also can take things apart and put them back together, he's very interested in how things work. He also plays a lot with blocks, tinker toys, etc..and builds elaborate cars, transformers, planes, with moving parts.

While I'm very happy my son is so smart, I truly just want him to be a normal boy. I want him to be able to make friends and be normal, I don't want kids to say he's weird and make fun of him. My son did make one friend this year at school, I got to know the mother and we have been getting together for regular playdates this summer and I think that has been helping him immensely.

 

[LisaR]

My son was labeled at gifted this past may. He is quirky and socially awkward so he received evaluations by a psychologist, regular teacher, speech teacher, special ed teacher, occupational therapist, and physical therapist. That's an awful lot of evaluations!!! I don't agree with them but that's what schools do now a days.

Anyway....he took some type of test with the psychologist and maxed out all the questions, he got everyone right and she said this test was for students up to 8 years old. She says that she's never seen that (and has been working in her field for over 20 years) and that there's no telling how much further he could have gone. They came to the conclusion that he has trouble socially because he has trouble identifying with kids his own age because he's an old soul.

Personally I wondered if we should just skip him a grade or two to keep him stimulated in class and the evaluators said that would be up to me and the principal of the school, however DH is adamantly against him skipping grades. Anyway...they decided to give him group therapy to help him learn how to be more socially appropriate.

So anyway, not sure if this post was sarcastic or not but I'll share with you some stuff about my son in case you were truly curious. He can read on his own pretty good, not just memorization, I can give him a book he's never seen and he can read it to me for the most part. He also can take things apart and put them back together, he's very interested in how things work. He also plays a lot with blocks, tinker toys, etc..and builds elaborate cars, transformers, planes, with moving parts.

While I'm very happy my son is so smart, I truly just want him to be a normal boy. I want him to be able to make friends and be normal, I don't want kids to say he's weird and make fun of him. My son did make one friend this year at school, I got to know the mother and we have been getting together for regular playdates this summer and I think that has been helping him immensely.

I'm not a psychiatrist and I don't play one on TV, plus we have already established through this thread that I am an idiot that doesn't hang out with intelligent people, so take my comments with a grain of salt.

I'm not sure what type of test they gave your son that he maxed out on. I am assuming we are talking about your 5 y/o in your signature line and not the 2 y/o. If we are talking about the 2 y/o, I will retract my statement.

There are academic achievement tests that should be done along with IQ testing. The academic achievement can test through high school. If the child tests above the high school level, it will show up as >12.9 (greater than 12th grade, 9th month). I'm not sure why they would stop at something an 8 y/o would do if he was capable of doing more. My son has never had any type of testing that was done by age. His testing has always been based on grade level and has always been able to test through high school.

Based on what I have always been told, an academic achievement score that is 2 or 3 grade levels higher than where the child is at currently is not overly unusual when they are younger. Many kids have a huge head start in the early years and things level out when they hit 3rd or 4th grade. It is the reason why many schools do not offer a gifted program for the younger grades.

I am NOT suggesting the testing results were wrong or that your son isn't smart. I am just curious if they did academic achievement testing?

 

[drag n' fly]

Yes my kids are gifted...at xbox, texting and laptops. They are great normal everyday kids who I wouldn't trade for the world

 

[dandave]

Yes and no. I was tested in the fifth grade, but my mother was only told that my IQ is above "X." I know the X value, but I certainly don't feel the need to share.
IQ only matters, if you use it. Otherwise, you're an idiot with a high IQ.
My kids are both... kids.

 

[collegejunkie]

don't have kids, but i'm a gifted kid. i do think that measuring accomplishments is completely different from measuring being gifted, however (like the examples in the first post).

 

[bluesaturn]

I'm not a psychiatrist and I don't play one on TV, plus we have already established through this thread that I am an idiot that doesn't hang out with intelligent people, so take my comments with a grain of salt.

I'm not sure what type of test they gave your son that he maxed out on. I am assuming we are talking about your 5 y/o in your signature line and not the 2 y/o. If we are talking about the 2 y/o, I will retract my statement.

There are academic achievement tests that should be done along with IQ testing. The academic achievement can test through high school. If the child tests above the high school level, it will show up as >12.9 (greater than 12th grade, 9th month). I'm not sure why they would stop at something an 8 y/o would do if he was capable of doing more. My son has never had any type of testing that was done by age. His testing has always been based on grade level and has always been able to test through high school.

Based on what I have always been told, an academic achievement score that is 2 or 3 grade levels higher than where the child is at currently is not overly unusual when they are younger. Many kids have a huge head start in the early years and things level out when they hit 3rd or 4th grade. It is the reason why many schools do not offer a gifted program for the younger grades.

I am NOT suggesting the testing results were wrong or that your son isn't smart. I am just curious if they did academic achievement testing?

It might have been the WPSII, which is the Weschler IQ test for ages (about) 2 to 7. So it maxes out at 7 and can't tell you where your child places beyond that. The next test (WISC) is for ages 6 to 18 so that's probably why they didn't give him another test yet. There is an academic achievement standardized test by the same creator that can be used as young as 4. It's useful in comparing "ability" to "achievement".

Also just on a random note, you'll usually see psychologists doing IQ testing not psychiatrists. I don't think most psychiatrists are trained in testing, they focus on medication.

 

[islandmum]

Now, our DD is a gifted athlete in golf. She has amazing natural ability with the golf and scores as well or better than other kids that work with swing coaches, sports psychologists, etc. all year round. She plays a few times in the winter and once or twice a week in the summer.

I was a scratch player in my mid teens, and plus 2 by 18 .... where is your daughters handicap at?

IMO a gifted golfer is way better than me, by the time I turned pro and had done the "I'm so brilliant at Amateur golf" tournament circuit I got the stuffing knocked out of me real quick by people who really WERE gifted at golf. +5, +6 handicaps, I never even got close to shooting their scores or their ability. I didnt last long with my playing career and went into management instead.

Good and talented at golf is one thing, gifted is a whole different level. Theres lots of talented golfers out there like you daughter, and I hope she does well, but gifted golfers .... you'll know them when you see them because they are so far above everyone else.

 

[golfgal]

I was a scratch player in my mid teens, and plus 2 by 18 .... where is your daughters handicap at?

IMO a gifted golfer is way better than me, by the time I turned pro and had done the "I'm so brilliant at Amateur golf" tournament circuit I got the stuffing knocked out of me real quick by people who really WERE gifted at golf. +5, +6 handicaps, I never even got close to shooting their scores or their ability. I didnt last long with my playing career and went into management instead.

Good and talented at golf is one thing, gifted is a whole different level. Theres lots of talented golfers out there like you daughter, and I hope she does well, but gifted golfers .... you'll know them when you see them because they are so far above everyone else.

My DD is about a 4 handicap. Where the "gifted" part comes in and if you had read my post is that she is a 4 handicap without even trying. She rarely practices, she doesn't work with a swing coach, psychologist, putting coach, short game coach, etc., etc. like the other top golfers in the state. She MAYBE plays once or twice a week in the summer. Most of her talent is natural. That is where the "gifted" part comes in.

 

[eliza61]

Yes my kids are gifted...at xbox, texting and laptops. They are great normal everyday kids who I wouldn't trade for the world

I'll go one step further. My teens have been known to do a bone headed thing a time or two.

I am amazed at the number of teens here that are the poster child for responsibility. they know exactly what they want to do in college, they are able to handle a full time job, never speed, never do anything ever that is unresponsible and get full scholarships.

I'm such a failure.

 

[golfgal]

I'll go one step further. My teens have been known to do a bone headed thing a time or two.

I am amazed at the number of teens here that are the poster child for responsibility. they know exactly what they want to do in college, they are able to handle a full time job, never speed, never do anything ever that is unresponsible and get full scholarships.

I'm such a failure.

Again, it comes down to the general demographics of the board--most people on this board are professionals with a good career (or spouse of such) where education is important, thus the higher likelihood of getting significant scholarship money to college---that and if you know where to look, the money is out there, a lot of people just don't bother. As far as speeding, etc. I think if you go back and read a lot of posts you will find that most parents here have posted on some bonehead (or not so bonehead) stupid stuff kids do. Also, why is it so hard to believe that there ARE good teenagers in the world and not all of the are speeding, drinking, misbehaving kids??

 

[onelilspark]

When I was in 3rd grade I was tested in Jersey and placed into their "Talented & Gifted" Program after scoring the highest possible score on the test.

We moved in the middle of 4th grade back to PA and I took their test. I didn't pass it. In hindsight, I'm glad, I hated the T&G program in Jersey.

I excelled in school and after-school activities. Not totally straight-As, but close and I didn't cheat...I helped those that had higher GPA's than me, but that got them by cheating on tests, homework, etc.

My brother on the other hand easily passed PA's test for Talented & Gifted and struggled all through school.

So IMO, those tests that they give kids to determine if they are "gifted" are kind of crap.

 

[Swan4Me]

One of my nephews is gifted-an only child of my very bright older brother who became his 24/7 mentor since birth

This kid was reading 50+ books every summer. In fact when he started 3rd grade my brother discovered the book she was using as her Reading book-he had read the previous summer.

He has done Quiz bowl, math bowl, science bowl, and in

7th grade recieved a Nationa Award given to 7th graders for Top 2% in the nation ACT scores(his score then is what you wish your High school Junior had)-the Nations averahe is 21

He was totally bored with the advanced classes Freshman year High school-so he applied for a very unique Public Boarding High School my state has in congunction with a University here.

Retook the ACT-scored 32-34 (36 is the highest), grades etc are requires-plus additional school activities and testing is required. Only 50 kids are admitted each year-just a Soph-Senior School(The XX School for Science Math and the Arts") and he got in.
So this year he will be among other genius-geek-brilliant types. The kids at this school all go on to the Major Universities of our Nation.

But I have to say , all in all, he doesnt have a lot of friends-in fact my brother says he wont miss being here because of that. So brilliance does have a price

 

[golfgal]

One of my nephews is gifted-an only child of my very bright older brother who became his 24/7 mentor since birth

This kid was reading 50+ books every summer. In fact when he started 3rd grade my brother discovered the book she was using as her Reading book-he had read the previous summer.

He has done Quiz bowl, math bowl, science bowl, and in 7th grade recieved a Nationa Award given to 7th graders for Top SAT scores(his score then is what you wish your High school Junior had)

He was totally bored with the advanced classes Freshman year High school-so he applied for a very unique Public Boarding High School my state has in congunction with a University here.

Highest SAT, grades etc are requires-plus additional school activities and testing is required. Only 50 kids are admitted each year-just a Soph-Senior School(The XX School for Science Math and the Arts") and he got in.
So this year he will be among other genius-geek-brilliant types. The kids at this school all go on to the Major Universities of our Nation.

But I have to say , all in all, he doesnt have a lot of friends-in fact my brother says he wont miss being here because of that. So brilliance does have a price

Ok, but is he really gifted or is he just a really smart kid??? There are schools like this all over the country full of bright kids, but that doesn't mean he is gifted. Being gifted is much more than just having a high IQ--but most schools use that as their baseline. There are PLENTY of gifted kids that do not have a 140+ IQ but they are gifted in other areas. I am sure there is more to your nephew's story but I can show you a dozen or more kids in our kids' grades at school that are at this level or higher.

I used to work at an elite boarding school in our state that had students from all over the world. They had between 50-60 kids/grade and while they were very bright kids, I can't recall any of them being truly gifted. They all went on to elite universities around the world.

 

[Magpie]

Ok, but is he really gifted or is he just a really smart kid??? There are schools like this all over the country full of bright kids, but that doesn't mean he is gifted. Being gifted is much more than just having a high IQ--but most schools use that as their baseline. There are PLENTY of gifted kids that do not have a 140+ IQ but they are gifted in other areas. I am sure there is more to your nephew's story but I can show you a dozen or more kids in our kids' grades at school that are at this level or higher.

I used to work at an elite boarding school in our state that had students from all over the world. They had between 50-60 kids/grade and while they were very bright kids, I can't recall any of them being truly gifted. They all went on to elite universities around the world.

gift·ed/ˈgiftid/Adjective
1. Having exceptional talent or natural ability: "a gifted musician".
2. Having exceptional intelligence: "gifted students".

I think this is the basic problem with any discussion we try to have on the topic of giftedness - there's no agreement on the definition.

Most psychologists and school boards define "gifted" as a score on a standardized test, indicating a child of particular intellectual potential, who would benefit from a broader, faster or deeper education beyond what's offered in the regular system. The schools use the tests as gatekeepers, to determine who gets into particular programs.

Many people, however, define "gifted" as synonymous with "genius". That kid ain't gifted unless he's doing calculus as a six year old and curing cancer by middle school.

Unless you can agree on terms, it's difficult to have any kind of conversation at all. People can't even agree on what constitutes "exceptional" intelligence! "Oh, he's not gifted just very smart." How smart does he have to be??

Maybe it'd be easier if we just picked a new word for children who demonstrate exceptional intelligence? One that doesn't make people grumpy? How about... My child is asparagus. She tested as highly asparagus on a test. They put her in a class for asparagusses, and for the first time in her life she feels like she belongs. Isn't it wonderful?

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

... How about... My child is asparagus. She tested as highly asparagus on a test. They put her in a class for asparagusses, and for the first time in her life she feels like she belongs. Isn't it wonderful?

I hate asparagus. Can we go with pie instead?

 

[golfgal]

gift·ed/ˈgiftid/Adjective
1. Having exceptional talent or natural ability: "a gifted musician".
2. Having exceptional intelligence: "gifted students".

I think this is the basic problem with any discussion we try to have on the topic of giftedness - there's no agreement on the definition.

Most psychologists and school boards define "gifted" as a score on a standardized test, indicating a child of particular intellectual potential, who would benefit from a broader, faster or deeper education beyond what's offered in the regular system. The schools use the tests as gatekeepers, to determine who gets into particular programs.

Many people, however, define "gifted" as synonymous with "genius". That kid ain't gifted unless he's doing calculus as a six year old and curing cancer by middle school.

Unless you can agree on terms, it's difficult to have any kind of conversation at all. People can't even agree on what constitutes "exceptional" intelligence! "Oh, he's not gifted just very smart." How smart does he have to be??

Maybe it'd be easier if we just picked a new word for children who demonstrate exceptional intelligence? One that doesn't make people grumpy? How about... My child is asparagus. She tested as highly asparagus on a test. They put her in a class for asparagusses, and for the first time in her life she feels like she belongs. Isn't it wonderful?

No, that is not what I am saying at all, but from what the poster posted, he sounds like a bright child, but not gifted. Again, it isn't just about having a high IQ, it is more about how you process that information, it's about "thinking outside of the box", etc. Sure, there are plenty of REALLY smart people out there, but they are still mainstream in their thought processes and are just really smart people, that does not mean they are gifted. The part of the definition that you missed is the "exceptional" part:

ex·cep·tion·al   [ik-sep-shuh-nl] Show IPA
adjective
1.
forming an exception or rare instance; unusual; extraordinary: The warm weather was exceptional for January.
2.
unusually excellent; superior: an exceptional violinist.
3.
Education . (of a child)
a.
being intellectually gifted.
b.
being physically or especially mentally handicapped to an extent that special schooling is required.

In this nephew's case, there are 50 other kids in his class and 100 more in the school just like him, that negates the rare or unusual part. Like I illustrated before, the boy that graduated top of DS19's class, scored 5's on all 27 of the AP tests he took by the end of his sophomore year in high school--that would be exceptional--that is beyond bright/smart. Scoring a 30 on an ACT as a freshman, while good, is not exceptional (rare). That is the difference.

 

[LIDisneyFan]

BIL is exceptional - tested at 180.

Can't keep a relationship because no one is as smart as him. Can't keep a job because no one is as smart as him - even in the astonishing career he has (literally a ricket scientist type thing). He gets bored easily with everything.

He says it was great as a kid and even in his early 20s. Now he sees it as a curse. MIL always said she used to brag about how smart he was and was so happy-and later in life went through the 'be careful what you wish for stage".


I feel bad for him.

 

[Swan4Me]

Ok, but is he really gifted or is he just a really smart kid??? There are schools like this all over the country full of bright kids, but that doesn't mean he is gifted. Being gifted is much more than just having a high IQ--but most schools use that as their baseline. There are PLENTY of gifted kids that do not have a 140+ IQ but they are gifted in other areas. I am sure there is more to your nephew's story but I can show you a dozen or more kids in our kids' grades at school that are at this level or higher..

Oh-I forgot -you live in MN
He is gifted-I'm not going into details

 

[golfgal]

BIL is exceptional - tested at 180.

Can't keep a relationship because no one is as smart as him. Can't keep a job because no one is as smart as him - even in the astonishing career he has (literally a ricket scientist type thing). He gets bored easily with everything.

He says it was great as a kid and even in his early 20s. Now he sees it as a curse. MIL always said she used to brag about how smart he was and was so happy-and later in life went through the 'be careful what you wish for stage".


I feel bad for him.

That would be very difficult. He sounds like our old neighbor--although our old neighbor was married and had kids. His wife was pretty smart and also had a degree in physics so that helped but I think he was just so happy that she did all the mundane stuff that it worked for them. It was almost painful trying to socialize with them as a couple though. He had zero social skills, couldn't keep up a conversation, etc. I dreaded calling their house if he was home because he would pick up the phone, "um, um, um "hello??" (like he had no idea what a phone did). If you asked to talk to his wife "um, well, I'm, well, I don't know, um, let me see if um, maybe she is home, um". Now, ask him about quantum physics or to do advanced calculus problems in his head-he's your guy.

 

[golfgal]

Oh-I forgot -you live in MN
He is gifted-I'm not going into details

There is no need to get snarky--this entire thread is about this exact topic and the definition of "gifted". Again, sounds like a really bright kid but "gifted" depends on much more than that.