Spin-off: Funeral costs

[Pea-n-Me]

From the insurance threads. What are funerals costing these days where you are?

We had one recently and it was well over $13,000, not counting the restaurant luncheon ($2500) and flowers (~ $500, I forget, exactly).

As compared to one we had in the 1980s which was $3500. Both were pretty minimal, too, just one day for a few hours, etc.

A friend of mine had an aunt die and had no money, so he literally had her put into a pine box and drove her himself for simple cremation two states away, which I think, in total ran about $1400 at the time (probably 15 yrs ago).

 

[Colleen27]

It is really hard to generalize because there's a huge range based on what "funeral" means to you.

We had a simple cremation, Catholic mass and luncheon at our parish hall for my mother's service. I spent about $3000, and will spend another $1000 (roughly) for opening the family plot to inter her remains and adding a grave marker. But she didn't want a viewing, and while our parish no longer has church ladies who cook for funerals, they don't charge for the use of the hall or help with setup/cleanup (beyond the expected donation for the funeral itself). So my only large costs were cremation, catering and flowers.

 

[ronandannette]

A direct cremation with no other services done by the provider and no special container (remains are returned in a cardboard box), can be had in our city for $1,300.00. Or so the advertisements claim. Most funeral homes here have a fixed price for a package of standard services that include transport, basic preparation for viewing (not including embalming or a casket), using their facilities for a viewing and/or service and them doing all the legal paperwork. A quick google says it’s about $3,500.00.

From there you pay per-item for things like embalming, a casket, a burial plot or other resting place, fees to actually be buried, fees for an officiant and musicians, fees for service folders/memorial cards, fees for family transport in limos, fees for flowers, fees for refreshments/catering. Some people who choose places of worship for funerals may have to pay fees for those too.

In our circle funerals tend to have a bit of a DIY element in that thay are usually memorial services held at our church, which charges no fees, and the church ladies provide the catering on a volunteer basis. No charge for music, as we have many people in our body who volunteer. Most often the final disposition has taken place prior (either burial or cremation) with very little fanfare so it’s hard to know what kind of money was spent.

 

[mjkacmom]

I think my parents’ was around $13,000,viewing for 4 hours, my dad had a quick service at the funeral home and then the ride to the cemetery for a graveside service, my mom transportation to the Catholic Church for funeral Mass and then to the cemetery for graveside service. We had the burial plot already. This didn’t include flowers or repast. No church luncheons here.

 

[leebee]

"Celebrations of Life" are pretty common here now, usually after a burial or cremation. I think it's cost-cutting, for sure. Local crematoria advertise a "full package" for about $1000. Not sure what that includes, but one website says "includes removal from place of death, 48 hour shelter of remains, transportation to local crematory, crematory fee, alternate container, burial/transit permit, Medical Examiner permit, necessary services of staff, return of cremated remains to designated person and postage fee or office appointment to pick up urn." This doesn't include any religious service, public attendance, etc. I have told DH and DD I don't care what they choose except I'd like to be cremated (heat or water); whatever else they want to do is up to them, based on the level of support they need at the time.

 

[TwoMisfits]

From the insurance threads. What are funerals costing these days where you are?

We had one recently and it was well over $13,000, not counting the restaurant luncheon ($2500) and flowers (~ $500, I forget, exactly).

As compared to one we had in the 1980s which was $3500. Both were pretty minimal, too, just one day for a few hours, etc.

A friend of mine had an aunt die and had no money, so he literally had her put into a pine box and drove her himself for simple cremation two states away, which I think, in total ran about $1400 at the time (probably 15 yrs ago).

In 2020, I think we spent about $20K for everything - the viewing, funeral, dinner, embalming, casket, flying the body across states, etc, but we also covered some travel expenses (airline, hotel, rental) for direct out-of-town family inheritors (my mom had $25K in life insurance for her funeral with her 6 kids as beneficiaries, so we all agreed to put that in the funeral pot, since that's what it was intended for per my mom...we split what remained at the end)...

That said, my mom had prepurchased her plot and gravestone, so those large expenses were not in our numbers...

 

[TCRAIG]

My mom’s was @5K for cremation, funeral mass, flowers, music, programs, newspaper notice, food for reception and tips. Her space in our church’s columbarium was already paid for and her mass was free but we did make a generous donation to the church/priest and all other attendants. We also had free use of the after service reception space and the ‘church ladies’ provided much of the food. We also had food brought in as a thank you to all the wonderful staff at the nursing home that mom was in.

 

[SC Minnie]

My stepfather passed in 2020. There was a viewing at the funeral home 2 hours before the service at the funeral home chapel then burial at a local cemetery with a short graveside service. His funeral was ~$8000.

My father passed last year. He was cremated. We had the funeral at the church with the ashes put in the columbarium. His were ~$3000 which included the urn (we picked a very simple one).

 

[Princesca]

My dad passed away recently, and he wanted to be cremated, so I think that was about $500 or $600 where my stepmom had it done. No fancy urn or anything, just a box. Then the memorial service, which was a few hours, was under $2000 I think, and we had food catered from a local deli. His internment in a stone monument at the cemetery was like $2000 including the plaque I think? So all told, about $5k?

 

[BroadwayHermione5]

Yep it’s crazy. My grandfather hasn’t been doing so well lately so my mom and aunt are trying to get stuff settled. Even for a quick two hours visitation in the morning followed by a mass in the funeral home at like noon followed by a burial (Tho we think he will be cremated-he keeps changing his mind what he wants) with a possible luncheon/early dinner with the veteran related relagia is still in the five digit zone. The cremation might bring it back into 4 digits but it’s still rough.

 

[Jangles]

Funerals are more expensive in the U.K. I think. My parents were brought home before the funeral and left in an open coffin until just before the funeral. Then a hearse came, the coffin was sealed and collected. The hearse was then ‘walked’ from the house to the Church. The wake was held at home with food and drink (and an overriding fug of sherry and mothballs). The funeral directors services and the Church services came to around £8000. I don’t think it is possible to have a funeral here for less than £3/4000.

We do have the so called ‘pauper’s funeral’. If no one claims a body the local authority will organise and bear the cost of a funeral director and a cremation.

 

[Kennywood]

I know this might sound bizarre, but one way to save money is to order the casket through Costco. From the reviews, the caskets is hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars less expensive than those offered at funeral homes. And the quality is as good or better than what's offered at funeral homes.

 

[bennifer]

My dad died last week and the couple hours of visitation, the funeral service, flowers and cremation cost $5800. To rent a casket for the visitation was almost $2000!

 

[LoveSpringsteen]

I know this might sound bizarre, but one way to save money is to order the casket through Costco. From the reviews, the caskets is hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars less expensive than those offered at funeral homes. And the quality is as good or better than what's offered at funeral homes.

I've read the same. In fact, I purchased my Mom's urn for her ashes through Costco and it was much less than buying an urn through the funeral home.

 

[LoveSpringsteen]

My dad died last week and the couple hours of visitation, the funeral service, flowers and cremation cost $5800. To rent a casket for the visitation was almost $2000!

I am sorry for the loss of your Dad.

 

[kdonnel]

Funerals seem like a huge waste of money. I hope my family disposes of my body in the cheapest manner possible. If only they could sell my body and make some cash.

 

[Skippy918]

My fil was cremated and I think it was under $1000. There was no service or anything like that.
My grandparents bought their cemetery plot in the 1960’s with some 2 for 1 deal with my great grandparents. Their funerals have already been paid for. My grandma is still living at 98. When she passes, everything is already arranged so my parents don’t have to do anything except call the funeral home. I think they planned their funerals in the 1990s.

 

[Kennywood]

We pre-planned and pre-paid my father-in-law's funeral. When he died, it was so less stressful to not have to worry about the funeral.

 

[Forevermarypoppins]

I think of this often. Neither myself or husband want any type of "funeral, per se". We have no religious affiliation and our families aren't all in the same geographical area.
I'm very much on the cremation and burial and that's it.

 

[Forevermarypoppins]

I know this might sound bizarre, but one way to save money is to order the casket through Costco. From the reviews, the caskets is hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars less expensive than those offered at funeral homes. And the quality is as good or better than what's offered at funeral homes.

I can attest to that. My loving, and faithful Catholic father wanted all the traditional rituals for his funeral. Getting the casket thru Costco was a BIG cost saver.