Special Needs Story

[jtkem5]

I need your help. I am looking for a story about a family who had a newborn with special needs. The story told of a family going on a planned journey to France and they had all of these plans but the plane unexpectedly landed in Holland and the family experienced all of the wonderful things that Holland offered. Their lives were different but richer having experienced Holland. It was a beautiful story about expectations and how they changed their course and had a wonderful journey despite changing destinations. I really need to find this story and pass it on to a friend.

Thank you for all of your help.
jtkem5

 

[janette]

Welcome To Holland

by
Emily Perl Kingsley
c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved.
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Another favorite from Erma Bombeck.

God Chooses Mom for Disabled Child
Written by Erma Bombeck Published in the Today Newspaper Sept. 4th, 1993

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures, and a couple by habit. This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children.

Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen? Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting his instruments forpropagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger.
"Armstrong, Beth; son; patron saint, Matthew.
"Forrest, Marjorie; daughter; patron saint, Cecelia.
"Rudledge, Carrie; twins; patron saint.... give her Gerard. He's used to profanity.
" Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."
The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a handicapped child a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."
"But has she patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it."
"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence. She'll have to teach the child to live in her world and that's not going to be easy."
"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness." The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, there is a woman I will bless with a child less then perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a spoken word. She will never consider a step ordinary. When her child says "Momma" for the first time, she will be present at a miracle and know it! When she describes a tree or a sunset to her blind child, she will see it as few people ever see my creations." "I will permit her to see clearly the things I see---ignorance, cruelty, prejudice--- and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."
"And what about her patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in midair.
God smiles. "A mirror will suffice."

 

[jtkem5]

Thank you for your reply. Thank you for the Erma Bombeck article. Both of these are perfect. I can't thank you enough!

 

[Snow Brite]

The one about Holland made me cry. That so sums it up perfectly. Thanks for sharing.

 

[joshsmom]

I received both of these when DS10 was born. Welcome to Holland is our life-story (mine and Josh's). I went through the grieving stages--all of them--that I was in Holland instead of Italy. But Holland is a pretty cool place--especially once you learn your way around and learn how to speak the language!! I'm sure Italy is beautiful--but Holland is also very beautiful and I'm blessed to be here.

 

[binny]

thank you, honestly. I needed that today more than you could know.


Im sitting here with tears streaming down my face. Remembering so many things about the struggles we have faced and how very far we have come.

I remember when Karissa said her first word, so much later than others, that first word was "love". I rejoiced! I called everyone I knew, I came here and shared my news. I will always remember what Dan said to me in that post. he said "She said it because she hears it so often" It made me cry then and it makes me cry now. Thanks Dan, you really made a difference to me that day.


Anyway, I'm sorry to hijack this post. Those stories just made me think about that.


Being the mother of a special needs child is a gift though some days its hard to see that. God Bless everyone who has this special gift.

 

[Stacey2grls]

I love that story! I read it for the first time on the Disabillities board, and I cried the first time I read it, it is so beautiful. For anyone with a special needs child, you learn that life isn't always what you thought it would be, and just like in the story, I found that I love Holland, and that Italy is too bright and flashy for me anyway.

 

[Snow Brite]

I love that story! I read it for the first time on the Disabillities board, and I cried the first time I read it, it is so beautiful. For anyone with a special needs child, you learn that life isn't always what you thought it would be, and just like in the story, I found that I love Holland, and that Italy is too bright and flashy for me anyway.

LOL! Yep! Italy has so been done. Who needs it?

 

[Dan Murphy]

Holland.........

binny....

 

[Nana Annie]

 

[LuvN~Travel]

Somebody forgot to hand out the tissues first! I've read the first one many times and it does describe the life with a special needs child. The second one I read for the first time today. Thanks for it from a mom of a special needs child!
Kim