Special kind of bravery

[ValarDisneyus]

I hate admitting this online. I feel like the internet is one of the best places for me to "relax" and "talk" to other people because you can't see me, so you have to judge me on the content of my character as displayed through my words.

*sigh*

Sooooo okay then. Just ripping off the bandaid. I have hypothyroidism, and I'm on treatment for military service related anxiety and depression. I can't say when it happened, but I know after my diagnoses I let myself gooooooo. And not in an Elsa I'm-going-to-rough-up-my-bangs way. Just before I decided I really wanted my family to start doing pretty regular vacations, I stepped on a scale and saw exactly 300 pounds. I am ashamed.

For reference, I'm 5'9", if anyone cares. Suffice it to say I know I've been unhealthy for some time. Even when trying to eat healthy, my weight kept creeping up. Sometimes I just felt like....why even try? My thyroid will never cooperate anyway.

Well, my doctor just adjusted my medicine, and I got seriously motivated to lose weight. I want to DO THINGS with my kiddo. I want to have a standard life expectancy.

I am limiting carbs and reasonably limiting calories. I've lost twenty pounds! I'm thinking about joining Planet Fitness.

I just poked in for support. Somehow joining a gym makes me want to cry. I can't even say why that is. Weight training is supposedly REALLY good for heavy people, though, and I have an elliptical and ample sidewalk at home for some cardio. I've already started walking (not quite as often as I'd like, though) to get myself prepared for long days in Disney. If I said Disney wasn't a HUGE motivator, it'd be a lie. Booking everything and having it just ahead of me keeps me motivated.

I'm really hoping I just posted this in a judgement-free zone. Could I trouble somebody for a high five?

 

[SarahDisney]

High five!

You're moving in the right direction and trying to get healthy, which is such an incredible thing! Twenty pounds is a great start, and I know that if you keep eating well and exercise (and keeping up with your medication, of course), you can lose even more!

Keep up the good work!

 

[pjlla]

I hate admitting this online. I feel like the internet is one of the best places for me to "relax" and "talk" to other people because you can't see me, so you have to judge me on the content of my character as displayed through my words.

*sigh*

Sooooo okay then. Just ripping off the bandaid. I have hypothyroidism, and I'm on treatment for military service related anxiety and depression. I can't say when it happened, but I know after my diagnoses I let myself gooooooo. And not in an Elsa I'm-going-to-rough-up-my-bangs way. Just before I decided I really wanted my family to start doing pretty regular vacations, I stepped on a scale and saw exactly 300 pounds. I am ashamed.

For reference, I'm 5'9", if anyone cares. Suffice it to say I know I've been unhealthy for some time. Even when trying to eat healthy, my weight kept creeping up. Sometimes I just felt like....why even try? My thyroid will never cooperate anyway.

Well, my doctor just adjusted my medicine, and I got seriously motivated to lose weight. I want to DO THINGS with my kiddo. I want to have a standard life expectancy.

I am limiting carbs and reasonably limiting calories. I've lost twenty pounds! I'm thinking about joining Planet Fitness.

I just poked in for support. Somehow joining a gym makes me want to cry. I can't even say why that is. Weight training is supposedly REALLY good for heavy people, though, and I have an elliptical and ample sidewalk at home for some cardio. I've already started walking (not quite as often as I'd like, though) to get myself prepared for long days in Disney. If I said Disney wasn't a HUGE motivator, it'd be a lie. Booking everything and having it just ahead of me keeps me motivated.

I'm really hoping I just posted this in a judgement-free zone. Could I trouble somebody for a high five?

Wow.... I'm super impressed with your "rip the bandaid and come clean" statement here! That took some guts.

Congrats on making the decision to change your life!! And double congrats on the 20 pounds gone for good!

I too restarted a journey to a slimmer better "me" with the motivation of a Disney trip..... but after the trip I got right back on track and made it to my goal weight about 6 years ago!!! And you know what??? If I did it, ANYONE can do it!!

I would like to invite you to join our September WISH challenge right here on the Dis WISH board (and of course, the October challenge when it begins!). We are a wonderful supportive group of like-minded folks who want to share our struggles and our triumphs with this journey called "weight loss"! We all use a different method.... some folks watch carbs, some follow Weight Watchers, other use Sparkpeople.... all over the place. Some folks (myself included) struggle to get an adequate amount of exercise while others run MARATHONS.... and others are in between those two stages. We are from all over the world (literally) and fall between late teens (well.... we did have a few teens at one point.... but not sure if we still do) and old ladies like me! Some are married, some have kiddos, some are SAHM and others are career folks. So as you can see, we cover every base. But we ALL want to lose weight or maintain a weight loss in a HEALTHY sustainable way! So PLEASE feel free to jump right in and join us!!!........................P

 

[bumbershoot]

Yay you!!!

Don't let a gym make you sad. Tour them to make sure you feel comfy there. Some gyms are better than other depending on your needs. My ymca is very easy to be in no matter your size or fitness level, which is nice. They are extremely welcoming and glad you're here. And weight training is great for everyone. I recommend finding a program so you progress nicely and don't get bored. If your gym participates in activtrax, that's a good one.

 

[keahgirl8]

The highest of fives.

This is absolutely a judgement free zone. Odds are, if you are reading this section, you've been there. We've all had that moment when we decided enough was enough. Kudos to you for getting started!

Never be sad or ashamed to go to the gym. You are there because you are doing what is necessary to change your life. Be proud of that. If anyone judges you for it, they aren't worth your time or energy.

 

[keahgirl8]

Yay you!!! Don't let a gym make you sad. Tour them to make sure you feel comfy there. Some gyms are better than other depending on your needs. My ymca is very easy to be in no matter your size or fitness level, which is nice. They are extremely welcoming and glad you're here. And weight training is great for everyone. I recommend finding a program so you progress nicely and don't get bored. If your gym participates in activtrax, that's a good one.

I can agree with this! My gym is a Salvation Army community center and it is awesome. There are people there of all levels, ages and sizes.

 

[ValarDisneyus]

I wish I felt like comfort was in the cards! More than anything else, I need somewhere open 24 hours a day. I work all day, I work on my master's at night. I'm going to start walking on my lunch breaks, but I could still wake up early on Saturday and Sunday and go weight training. (I know it's ideal to put a day of rest in between, but...well. Work with what you've got, right?)

 

[Heather.Mohler]

That is so exciting! Congratulations on taking that first step. I have gotten up to 391 so I understand the feeling of not being able to change things. It just seems insurmountable sometimes. But it can be done. It has been done. And you will do it too. So will I! If there ever was a judgement-free zone, this is it! You have my respect, support, prayers, and shoulder. No worries! My sister joined Planet Fitness and LOVES it. She started a bit over 300 and in about 3 months has lost 35 pounds. She looks great and, more importantly, feels better than she has in years. She is off medicines and did her first 5k with our mother and I last week. I love the change I have seen in her attitude. Once you see that first bit of progress everything else gets easier.

Welcome to the fight!
Heather

 

[ValarDisneyus]

TYSM Heather! It helps SO much to hear about success from others who've been as heavy as I was. It makes it all more real: it reminds me that perseverance really does pay.

Almost 30 down...

 

[Waiting2goback]

First- Thank you for serving our country and I'm sorry you have the issues you have as a result.


I say HOOORAY for you. If you don't like the gym do an at home program like P90X. I first did P90X about 6 years ago and I still love it. You get healthy and in the comfort of your own home and you can fit it into your day whenever you can.

If you like the gym, that is fine too. The important thing is that you do it consistently and before you know it you will LOVE working out. You heard me. You will LOVE it and you will feel lost without it if you take a day off. Why? Because once you see how good you will feel you won't want to stop.

My recommendation is to not focus on the scale too much. I weigh myself only once a month. Those daily fluctuations can make you go crazy. Just focus on making good food choices and regular exercise and the scale will take care of itself. You'll know your losing weight when the clothes start to get loose.

If you need motivation think about signing up for a runDisney race. I signed up for one before I ever ran a step and I will be there Saturday 30 lbs lighter. It was my motivation and it worked. I am even doing my first marathon on 10/19 and I was a couch potato at this time last year. You can do whatever you set your mind to. The only thing stopping you is you!!!

 

[BernardandMissBianca]

Hi five!!! I'm a Planet Fitness geek and I love my gym! Everyone there is super nice.

However, they are not all open 24/7. Mine closes at like 9pm on Friday and are open from 7-7 on Saturday and Sunday. So double check their hours before you sign up.

Don't worry about the scale. Just worry about how you feel. Physical and mentally. I found my mental clarity was better as I ate better and worked out.

Also don't look so far ahead. My long term goal was to lose 70 pounds. I can easily convince myself that that's impossible. But 5 pounds, yeah I can do that. Sometimes my goals in the beginning were things like take the stairs and not be winded. Go 2 days without having to take Maalox. Silly as it sounds I took Maalox 2 times a day for 3-4 years. It was bad. Make small changes, it will go a long way. Join us on the WISH challenge threads, everyone is so supportive there!!

 

[Zoesmama03]

High Five!!

I suffered for a couple of years with anxiety and even though I was already overweight that period and some med changes during the early stages didn't help me and I put on even more weight. I'm finally dropping fairly steady and slow.

My labs started showing increases in fasting blood glucose and I was put on Metformin after about 24 weeks of my NP letting me try to get it lowered on my own. Even after starting it in 4 months or so my numbers weren't dropping so I had it increased. I think a combo of that and with "some" work I've managed to keep it moving downward.

My anxiety was finally controlled with a combo of Lexapro and Xanax which I'm happy to say I've been off for sometime now and still doing well. Only minimal normal anxiety levels and no more panic attacks. I learned some valuable coping skills but at one time I thought it would never end. Just hang in there. I know I'll probably always be prone to it but for now I function and don't feel bound to home like I did. My counselor thought I was beginning stages of agoraphobia which makes sense. I had several panic attacks while out and just being in the grocery store, sitting in a audience at one of my daughters shows at school, or church any of that was enough to kick on my flight or fight and I just wanted out. Couldn't breath, feared too much out of nothing.

I started in March at 331 and down to 305 today. It's coming off slow but mostly because I don't go as hard as I could on my eating and not walking enough. You can do it. And starting to admit these things to ourselves helps a lot. I fought the idea it was "in my head" or anxiety I was so sure something had to be wrong with my heart or something. The feelings were horrible. But finally I let it sink in and after trying just groups and counseling I decide to go a route I never thought I would and start on an antidepressant Lexapro. My depression wasn't but a high mild to moderate range but it helps with both.

Thank you for your service. I feel like my little anxiety period is just a glimpse of how so many come back from deployments and service.


I have a limited budget but lots of body weight exercises you can do at home too. I started with dumbbells I purchased many years back and later filled a gallon jug with water for something a bit heavier. Other than that walking and swimming. But like I said not as much as I could work at it. So I joined the Oct exercise challenge and going to work at 30-45 minute walks each day.

 

[zanzibar138]

Another high 5 here!

And congratulations on the weight loss so far

I just wanted to say to you that if you don't like going to the gym, or it makes you uncomfortable, don't go. There are plenty of exercise programs you can do in the comfort of your own home, using your own body weight to start with or even canned foods etc.

I have tried gyms, three times now. I've paid my joining fee and the monthly fee for the length of my contract (a year). Then I've gone like three times. I've tried using cardio/weights machines, doing classes, using the pool... Nothing interests me, I feel uncomfortable there, the classes are on at inconvenient times, and I can just never get motivated to go. It's been a huge waste of money. I have come to the conclusion that I am just not a gym person, and do all my workouts from home.

I am a beginner runner, and I do 3 runs per week, as well as walking my dogs every day. That is my cardio. For strength training, I use the plans from 30 Day Fitness Challenges. I do all my working out when it suits me, my cardio out in fresh air, and my strength training away from prying eyes.

On the other hand, some people really enjoy the comradeship of the gym, and enjoy working out with other people. If you like the idea of going to a gym, and it's just the thought of being judged that you don't like (which is absolutely fair enough!), then see if you can do a trial for a couple of weeks to see if you feel comfortable there.

 

[keahgirl8]

Honestly, I love the gym, but I work out alone. I just like what I like, so I do a mix of running outside, gym machines, and videos at home. You just have to figure out what works for you.

 

[pikaboo27]

High Five!

Congrats on what you have already lost!

I started at 280 lbs (i'm 5'6") so I feel you! I've lost 60 lbs and I'm training for my first half marathon in May. It's hard to find time to workout but you just have to do what works for you. I work out at lunch and I have a cousin who is a certified trainer who helps me with my weight training one a week in the evening. I can do cardio like crazy, but I suck at doing weight training by myself so it's nice to have the push.

You can do this! Good luck!