Spanking , hitting kids

[huckster]

ok if you call it spanking then its ok? would you spank a person that was not doing what you want ? (no really) then why would you spank .. hit .. your child ...i just dont believe in this type of punishmnet,, small spank or big ..theres just to many other ways. what do you think?

 

[Hillbeans]

I completely agree with you, and will not spank my child. I never have and both myself and my husband agree that we won't do this.

I feel it does nothing to help the situation.

That being said, I was spanked occasionally when I was little and I turned out ok.

 

[caitycaity]

i think there is a difference between spanking and hitting. spanking, i don't have a problem with. my parents spanked me and my sister and we are fine. quite frankly we deserved it any time they spanked us.

 

[huckster]

does spanking inflict pain?

 

[Ted and Holly]

Originally posted by huckster
does spanking inflict pain?

That is a loaded question. There are levels of "pain".

Spanking, in my opinion, offers just enough of a sensation to get someone's attention.

i was spanked as a child and I have no ill feelings about it.

I was a kid, I know for a FACT that I would not have stopped doing whatever I was doing if I were engaged in a "discussion" about it.

Ted

 

[poohandwendy]

I agree with caity.

does spanking inflict pain?

briefly, yes.

i just dont believe in this type of punishmnet,, small spank or big ..theres just to many other ways. what do you think?

I believe every parent should decide what disciplinary methods work for them.

 

[Maleficent13]

They really have got to add a popcorn smiley to our list of choices!!

 

[vernon]

Children are not small adults, there are times when you can not talk them through something and they will understand your reasons. There are occassions where, for safety, a parent needs a child to obey them, immediately, without question. There are times where a child is throwing a tantrum (not adult behaviour) and a quick, sharp smack on the backside will bring them to their senses sufficiently for the parent to be able to make them understand that behaviour is not acceptable in that situation. IMHO it's like having the death penalty on the statutes for certain crimes, the threat needs to be there, and VERY occassionally (if warranted) needs to be used. Bringing up kids can be hard work, at times a parent needs to make sure they have a range of options to keep control of various situations. Smacking all the time loses it's ability to shock the child, used occassionally it can take control of a potentially dangerous situation quickly, when speed is an over riding factor. To ignore it's benefits could mean the difference between your childs life or death.

All kids are different, some ( VERY few) kids respond to being told that mummy and daddy will be dissapointed if they do X, but in my experience most require some sort of punishment to bring about the required response. Sometimes that requires some sort of corporal punishment (or the threat of it).

If a smack on the backside ( or the threat of it) stops a kid from walking into the road in front of a car (or other equally dangerous activity) then it's more than justified.

If you're one of the lucky parents whose kids NEVER do anything that justifies a wallop, then you're very fortunate. However I've lost count of the amount of spoiled brats I've seen whose parents ignore their outragious behaviour, the kids rule their families with tantrums and demands. If you hand over the command of your family, to your kids, because you're too worried about using what ever is required to control your child then you're in for a torrid time.

 

[Bob Slydell]

This is one of those personal, parenting things that everyone will have an opinion and everyone's opinions and approach will be different. Whatever works for each family (short of beating the crap out of kids).

 

[Bob Slydell]

Originally posted by Maleficent13
They really have got to add a popcorn smiley to our list of choices!!

<a href='http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZZzebYYY' target='_blank'><img src='http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/1041.gif' alt='Munching' border=0></a>

 

[Big Dude]

Originally posted by Maleficent13
They really have got to add a popcorn smiley to our list of choices!!

 

[chadfromdallas]

Originally posted by Ted and Holly
i was spanked as a child and I have no ill feelings about it.

I was, too.

Since age 6, I've never looked at a belt without getting a slight chill

 

[poohandwendy]

well said vernon! ITA

 

[MosMom]

(short of beating the crap out of kids).

<a href='http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZSXXXXXX40US' target='_blank'><img src='http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/4/4_13_2.gif' border=0></a>

 

[mrsltg]

If a smack on the backside ( or the threat of it) stops a kid from walking into the road in front of a car (or other equally dangerous activity) then it's more than justified.

The reason for my dd's first spank when she was about two and a half!

There is nothing wrong with hitting a child on the butt to grab their attention as you cannot really reason with a little child. I can tell her till I'm blue in the face that a 3000 pound car would crush her 38 pound body and she will die and be gone forever, but that doesn't mean she'll get it. The quick smack on her behind reminds her to stay away from the street. Lesson learned. We'll save physics for later.

Erin

 

[snoopy]

I was never spanked as a child, and I've never spanked my kids as a form of punishment. I did spank my youngest child once, a quick swat on the behind, when he went to put his hand on a lit stove. More to get his attention then discipline him, in other words.

 

[Lynn CC]

DH and I have NEVER spanked or hit our son who is 17.
So far so good, he's a great kid. We've always treated one another with respect in our house, it's the only way.
It drives me crazy when I see a kid being verbally or physically abused. Have you noticed that you don't really see people spanking their kids out in public anymore? I haven't seen it in a long time! Verbal abuse, well I guess they think that's different Just the tone of their voice, as their "reprimanding" their kids makes me want to...well, nevermind.

 

[KristiKelly]

I guess it depends on how you view it. Have I spanked my kids? I dunno, I've popped their bottoms. I have never used anything other than the palm of my hand. I asked my son the other night in a hypothetical situation, if he'd rather have a spanking or spend an hour in his room, he said he'd rather have a spanking. Now, I can't stand being out somewhere & here some redneck say, "you're gonna get a whippin' (or whoopin') when we get home!" Ugh, just makes me cringe. When I was growing up my mom used a belt - let me tell you - That sucks!!! Am I messed up in anyway from that?? No, but I won't use a belt on my kids.

Once in a Walmart parking lot when DD was 3, my hands were full & I told DS to hold onto my coat & he hold DD hand. Right in the middle of Walmart Christmas traffic DD screamed, "I don't want to hold his hand" & took off running into all the Walmart traffic. 2 cars had to slam on breaks to prevent hitting her. I left the full cart & what I was carrying in the middle of the roadway, grabbed her and popped her good. Now, is this wrong? 3 pops on the bottom or let her run out & get hit by a car? This was shortly after a woman was videod "abusing" her child in a mall parking lot. I called DH & told him that I'd probably make the 6:00 news for what I did. Now, is DD "messed up" from this? I don't think so, I don't even think she remembers it, but for some reason she does know without being told that she MUST hold someone's hand while in a parking lot.

DH has a cousin who firmly doesn't believe in spanking, yet her 7 year old son who is full of both, self-esteem & disrespect will hit HER in the face, stomach, arm, wherever he can. His punishment - Time out. Well apparently that's not working.

 

[Ted and Holly]

As snoopy says, a quick swat on the behind gets their attention. To call that physical abuse is a bit excessive.

Ted

 

[Christine]

There were occasions that I had to swat my kids on the behind, or wrist, etc., to stop their behavior. It didn't happen often, but when I had to do it I felt that it was necessary. It usually always involved a safety issue. Now that my kids are 13 and 9, I can see no reason why I would have to do that and I can't remember when I last did that.

I was also "swatted" as a child and don't feel abused, humiliated, etc. In fact, I'm sure it was appropriate for my behavior.