So what do you think?

dopeygirl156

DIS Veteran
Joined
Sep 4, 2006
Messages
622
I've been writing songs for a few years and i want your oppinion on one.

The Second String

You took my heart and tore it in two
Now what am i suppose to do with you
You expect everything will be okay
You don't know me
You don't know how i feel
(chorus)
I'm the second string
Not good enough for you
Now i see it was all just a lie
You weren't my friend then
And now you'll never be
( end chorus)

I trusted you with all my heart
Thinking you'll always be there for me
Now what i see and what you did
I can't trust you ever again

How could i be so blind
I thought you were different from all the other guy
Now i see that your ust the same
Same as the rest who just don't care Oh no

(chorus)

I couldn't see the truth
I only saw what i wanted to
I saw a kind, gentle, sweet loving person
But all you are is a lie, backstabbing, name calling, drug adict no good friend


I thought this was over
I thought you were done with all the lies
I kept letting you back in my life
You said That you have changed
You said this time would be different








I'm still thinking of more, but what do you think so far. And when it says chorus i don't write the chorus its just telling you thats what it should be.
 

First of all, only read this post if you can put up with brutal honesty..

It's ok..The beat doesn't seem like it would flow all that well, its defintly not bad though. Keep working.
 
EeyoreFan1 said:
First of all, only read this post if you can put up with brutal honesty..

It's ok..The beat doesn't seem like it would flow all that well, its defintly not bad though. Keep working.

Thanks for being honest i'm still working on that but its coming along. And i'm not saying that when everyone said they really liked it i'm not saying that your lieing but if there is anyone who doesn't like it tell me, i can deal with it. I like to hear if people don't like it so i can fix it more. I like to hear everyone's oppinions good and bad, thats how i can make it better.
 
dopeygirl156 said:
Thanks for being honest i'm still working on that but its coming along. And i'm not saying that when everyone said they really liked it i'm not saying that your lieing but if there is anyone who doesn't like it tell me, i can deal with it. I like to hear if people don't like it so i can fix it more. I like to hear everyone's oppinions good and bad, thats how i can make it better.
Good for you. :)
 
Wow. It's pretty good. Not like I could come up with something better, but still very good.
 


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