So frustrated with our finances right now.

[kamik86]

Have you ever tried a crockpot? Some of my favorite recipes don't even involve defrosting (I am HORRIBLE at remembering to defrost)-- you just throw frozen chicken or pork chops in there with a couple of other items, and you've got dinner made! Also, I try to stay out of Walmart and Target. I even buy my Laundry detergent, etc at the grocery store. I know it costs a bit more to buy them there, but I actually save money by keeping my butt out of Walmart !! --Katie

Unfortunately we can't avoid going to Target. Well I can but DH can't... He works there. He gets great discounts but there are many things we buy that we probably don't need because he finds a great deal on them.

I did just get a crock pot... used it to make spaghetti sauce and made meatballs and froze it.... we will have that for dinner one day next week which will be a cheap meal (we have pasta already in pantry too).

 

[ssawka]

You also have to consider where you live. We are in the DC Metro area, and with prices around here, there is no way we could eat for $100 per person per month. DW does the shopping, but I'm guessing we are between $400-$500 a month, not including eating out. Part of that though is because we have to buy gluten-free food for DD.

 

[ssawka]

Unfortunately we can't avoid going to Target. Well I can but DH can't... He works there. He gets great discounts but there are many things we buy that we probably don't need because he finds a great deal on them.

I did just get a crock pot... used it to make spaghetti sauce and made meatballs and froze it.... we will have that for dinner one day next week which will be a cheap meal (we have pasta already in pantry too).

Doesn't Target sell groceries? Do you get at least some of you groceries there since DH gets a discount?

 

[cglaura]

I'm sorry if I missed it if you are already doing this...

I saw that your retirement is in check, but it is specific things you are having trouble saving.

What helped me with this is to create a specific savings accounts for what I wanted to buy/achieve. I have one for each category I am saving: retirement, emergency, car, vacation.

The retirement accounts are totally different in nature (no 401K offered, self employed). Emergency is a savings account attached to my regular checking. So I can transfer for the emergency to pay the bill with my debit card or payoff the credit card used.

My car and vacation are two separate passbook accounts. I have to go to the bank to get the money. I know this is the least amount of interest type accounts, but they are sort of short term. Anything unused gets transferred to emergency or retirement. ETA: emergency account is also where I put $$ for home repair/maintenance.

Then I have another checking account that I pay monthly, things that need to be paid quarterly/yearly (se taxes, sewer, homeowners insurance, car insurance). I take all those fees, divide by 12, and pay that checking monthly, just like a bill.

When I pay the bills, I pay my savings just like it was a bill. Then (which I know is easier said than done for some), just don't touch it. I really treat it like a bill...as in, if I send Comcast $80, I can't go get it back. So neither can these.

Although I am sorted out now, there was a time after divorce and a mess of finances (whole other story for whole other thread. with dirtbag ex), I purchased a gift card for my groceries. At the time it was Acme. So, I knew when that was done, it was done.

I learned quick to manage that spread for the month or those last week meals were, uh, yeah. Lots of peanut butter.

I know having this many accounts is probably not ideal for most, but it is a way for me to keep organized and separate. Out of site, out of mind sort of thing.

My friend is the opposite. He puts into savings what he has left at end of month. Which is not alot, because he impulse buys.

It seems you have a good idea of budget on paper, so you know how much you can save each month.

Good luck, it seems you have a pretty good base...employment/retirement. Just have to fine tune. And stick with it!

 

[littlebit0863]

I couldn't believe it when I wrote it all down and realized I spent $200 a month in Starbucks. What helped me with food was I made a strict food budget. I divided it by the days in the month and allotted myself that much cash per day, the envelope system. In the first month, I ate Ramen, toast, and cereal the last 4 days because I had used up my food money and that's what I had in my pantry. Month 2 was better, because I learned my lesson.

 

[Tinetine]

What really helped me stay on budget is to switch to cash. That way, you have to limit your spending to what you budgeted.
As for savings, I never thought denying myself a 20$ book, or a 40$ skirt meant much...until I started adding the amounts I was spending on non-essentials, and then looking at it for the whole year. So a 1,000$ a month "lost" in your budget is 12,000$ for a year . That's a nice chunk of a downpayment ! You have to put yourself in another mindset : do I want new clothes (or gadgets) every week,even if you can afford it, or do I want a big fat bank account ?

 

[sookie]

This is not a budget, this is tracking your spending.
So you are at least starting it.

Cut the crap. That is what I translated your original post into - down to 3 words. Not to be mean - but that's what you are saying to yourself, right? You know it - I mean, you basically wrote it in your post - but in a lot of words! Cut back on the eating out. Look at your groceries - what are you spending it on? Could you cut back on the trips to the delis and start taking your lunch? Could you limit out your date nights to twice a month - or even once a week?? When we cut back, we cut back to 2 big date nights a month and then 2 date nights in a month (take out). That helped. We actually like our stay ins better now that we have our kiddos and are settled down more.
And I know you are asking yourself - how in the world are you spending 100 a month in COMICS?! That is squandering it. But really, people can say this about anything... video games, lingerie, whatever. When you are 65, are you going to be happy that you have 1,000's of dollars of comics - some of which may or may not be worth anything? Probably, the majority of them won't be worth anything. You will have probably gotten rid of the ones that were before then anyway. And I'm saying that as the loving wife of an old comic book nerd. Thank god he gave that habit up 1-2 years into our relationship - but it was never on that scale. You have to cut it back. Way back. $100 is too much. Go back. When things are more stable - guess what? You can go back to your 100 dollars if you want. When the savings account is funded. Tighten the belt for now.

You know where this is headed. Take control. You have to. You have a good job - you can do this! You do need to be saving more. Because if something changes you will totally be kicking yourself that you didn't save for a rainy (or bad) day.

 

[maggs1035]

So I just went through the budget for this week and we over spent by
$100 Last week it was $200.

Now we aren't really in debt. Technically we can afford what we are spending. But we aren't getting any savings. We will manage to have the money for our vacations we have planned and for expenses. But there won't be any real savings. I feel like we should be saving alot more. I feel like the budget we have on paper that both DH and I look at and think should work should be working and we should be saving... but we are always over and the saving covers that.

I am blessed to have a job that pays really well. But I feel we are squandering it. I spent a embarrassingly high amount of money on clothes two weeks ago. My DH spends probably $100 a month on comic books but those two I can deal with because we have our "fun money" accounts and in general manage to stay in them (DH is always a bit in the red but he is one of those people that if you give him $5 he will spend $5 even if he only wanted something worth $2.)

The big problem though is food. We have a budget of $1000 a month for what we call "variable expenses" but really its gas for the car, food, and general household stuff (paper towels, toilet paper, etc). The gas is about $40 a week. Which means we are spending over $800 a month on food. More since we are always going OVER the budget!! Oh and there are only two people we are feeding here.

I feel like we should be doing so much better on this part.

So do people have any tips for me on how to spend less on food? I'm trying to eat healthier too... When I just give up and we eat out all the time we actually do much better... when I'm trying and only doing ok like that week then we really blow the budget. Almost $100 was eating out. Although about $50 was from one trip we always do on Friday's. The rest was littler bits at a time (Subway, Wendy's, Papa Ginos, and panera bread).

Then there was $102.53 in grocery stores... but all in little chunks 6 separate trips.

I guess I just feel overwhelmed. I know we used to spend much less on food 3 years ago before I got this job and yet until I saw it all on paper today I had thought we really did good last week.

Goodness!!! We only spend between $500 and $600 a month on food for a family of 5?? Spend half of that $1000 and put $500 in savings!

 

[crisi]

Personally, I've always found it a pain in the butt to track spending IF I had "enough" money but it was just getting wasted. The better plan for my husband and I is to just decide to spend less. The hard part is getting my husband in line. I just watch my pennies and dimes (and dollars and twenties). Do I need this? Can I get it for less?

I don't need a glass of wine when we go out to dinner, in fact, I can drink water and split dessert. I don't need ice cream at the grocery store. I can keep going for a few months with my tennis shoes, have plenty of shoes, I can do my own nails (its best if once a month I get a real manicure, but I don't need it every month). Its harder to get my husband to pull out stops, but he can as well.

 

[BubMunkeyBles]

Plan meals, even if it's an easy meal. I'm horrible about thawing stuff in time too (and I stay home, just get busy). But there is always a back up meal. Crock pot meals are awesome (and you often can put frozen meat in). With two people you may even want to try doubling and saving the second portion for another night. We budget $600/month for food and that includes eating out. We live in a high cost of living area though and it would be really hard to get much under that. We do buy some convenience type stuff though.

 

[kamik86]

Doesn't Target sell groceries? Do you get at least some of you groceries there since DH gets a discount?

SOME target's have groceries. Our's does not.


To the one saying DH has to spend less on comic's. No. This one is one that although it frustrates me because I don't see why he likes them so much and they take up sooo much space. I can't tell him no unless he overspends his fun money. That is the deal with the fun money. He may not like what I spend mine on either.

 

[jsmith]

Try this-besides tracking your spending-decide how much you want to put in savings each pay period for each of you-we have a set amout each of us deposits in non retirement discretionary savings each week. Hubs gets paid once a week and i get paid bi weekly so my amount is twice as much as his. If you get paid by direct deposit simply have the the amount you want to save directly deposited into a savings account( your employer will let you split your deposit)-and ive found that having that account in bank seperate from where we have our checking accounts works best. The do your budget based on whats deposited in your checking account-the savings money is already gone and off your radar-you dont have to think about it and you cant spend it with out doing an interbank transfer. If you want to move it to a higher yeild vehicle-although there arent tons out there-you can do it every six months. This is basically the pay yourself first process-but it works-and mostly that money is out of site out of mind-ours goes into a credit union that only sends quarterly statements-my budget is based on what i know i will see deposited each week. Then i have a "liquid" savings that i transfer things live overtime, tax refunds, and any of the weekly budget that is left at the end of the week into and that funds our vacations and such. If you dont get paid by direct deposit you can achieve the same thing with an automatic transfer on the day you get paid-i.e friday or everyother friday. This way you can still budget out of your budget wmoney for savings-but if you blow it one week-you havent totally blown it. It sounds complicated-and probably silly to the budget board gurus but it works-and i dont have to think about it.

 

[Jeff_G]

SOME target's have groceries. Our's does not.
To the one saying DH has to spend less on comic's. No. This one is one that although it frustrates me because I don't see why he likes them so much and they take up sooo much space. I can't tell him no unless he overspends his fun money. That is the deal with the fun money. He may not like what I spend mine on either.

Start getting your fun money each week in cash, make a promise to each other you will not dip into the bank account if you dont have enough fun money.

Switch to cash for dining out / restaurants, set an amount each month and when its gone you don't eat out.

I would split out your budget, gas and bigger household stuff from groceries. For us TP, paper towels, cleaning supplies, etc all go into "groceries" basically everything I purchase at the grocery store into that bucket.


For me I find that I kill the budget when I make multiple small trips into the store. So I try to go once a week. I make a list of what I am going to purchase and I stick to it.


Biggest thing to do, get out a piece of paper and create a budget for the month on paper so you can see it. Shelter, Utilities, Food, transportation, then list out other bills and expenses. List your income at the top and subtract the two, better not be a negative number...

 

[moonpie85]

We could easily spend $300 a week on groceries and have in the past. We started emeals at the beginning of the year and it has helped keep our food spending in check tremendously. Yes, you have to pay a couple bucks a month for it and yes you could easily take the time and plan the meals yourself for free. But the truth is, I'm lazy, I'm not gonna take the 30 minutes to plan my weeks meals so it is the best option for us.

You might wanna check it out

 

[SplashMo]

Some items that do not cost very much are eggs, rice and potatoes. Add those into the other food you eat it saves money. Oatmeal for breakfast is tasty and cost effective as well. Splurge on some steaks and salmon instead of dinners out.

I hardboil eggs a dozen at a time and eat them through out the week. I also cook meat once a week and freeze it in lunch size meals. I take it to work frozen and it keeps until lunch where it gets microwaved. I only drink water which saves money and is also very healthy...

I like to shop the perimeter of the store for vegetables, fruit, meat, eggs and dairy and I avoid the aisles with all of the pre-packaged foods which saves money and is healthier as well.

Just thoughts...

 

[Couchy]

OP - we also spend alot on in incidentals , food, eating out and buying stuff we can afford it and we do have savings. It his past year it has not grown at all because I have been looser with the budget. Just have to sit down and set limits I guess.

To the people wondering about groceries . DH and I spend 100 a week and it is not really frivolous at all. We spen about $50 A week on produce alone. We eat tons of fruits and veggies and it is expensive. Nothing fancy either : apples, oranges, grapes, celery, carrots, peas, cucumbers, beans, zucchini, tomatoes, lettuce, etc. we then usually buy chicken on sale, ground turkey and tilapia. A couple boxes of cereal, and crackers, granola, cheese and Greek yogurt and milk and sometimes ice cream . $100 every time
It's not hard

 

[bridgie04]

I have cut my grocery bill literally in half by shopping at a grocery called Aldi. Do you have one near you? I go in with a list of meals I will cook for the upcoming week. HUGE savings. I have two extra kids this week (2 nieces) in addition to my DD and DH this week. I just spent just over $100 and am set for breakfast, lunch and dinner for the 5 of us.

 

[Tiger926]

I am having a hard time following the OP...

They can't figure out how to save money to buy a house, they spend double on food for 2 people than most of us spend on 4, yet it's ok to spend $100.00/month on comics? What is the OP's Fun Money budget? Doesn't compute!

We don't have Fun Money, and we don't believe in it. Spending $100.00/month on comics shows a serious issue with comics and overspending as far as I'm concerned. OP is doing great with retirement savings, but the overspending on food and comics could easily go towards paying for a house.

We rarely eat out (birthday here or there), don't drink alcohol, buy daily coffee nor drink pop, and the amount of money we save right there alone can pay for Disney each year! We eat very healthy, cook our own food, don't eat packaged or processed foods either, and don't really have coupons here in Canada for good food. The amount that they are spending on food is enourmous for 2 people, compared to us buying fresh foods. They need to start right there! I agree with everyone else, that OP needs to majorly work on the food budget, and then cut out that Fun Money, and if they refuse to do that, then $20.00/month is all it should be.

As my banker hubby sees everyday at work, the worst budget drainers are the little things as people don't add them up until it's too late: Starbucks, book, DVD, etc. Doesn't seem like a lot at first, but at end of month or end of year, yikes! $1200.00 a year on comics is utterly ridiculous, IMHO.

We all spend money differently, and prioritize differently, but this doesn't seem that difficult to rectify, but it is difficult if there is a psychological or emotional block with the spending. If that's the case, which it seems to be with the Fun Money/Comics, than I would suspect it's going to continue. Making a few meals in a crock pot is certainly better than eating out each night, but getting an actual handle on where their money is going, and spending it more wisely is what they need, IMHO.

OP needs to give herself permission to not spend the money just because it's there, or because it's easier on them to eat out, Tiger

 

[2disneyboys]

Our grocery budget is huge $600-800 for the 4 of us). However, it's very hard to get fresh fruits, veggies, meats much cheaper. We nosh on fruits and veggies all day long. I mean even a bag of gala apples are $4-5 dollars... We go through bags a week, as opposed to my sister whose family eats more packaged type foods... Her snack budget is 1/4 of mine, but none of it is fresh fruits and veggies. So op, yes I can see where it's easy to have a large grocery budget. I also went to cash. Cash for eating out and for groceries. Now, when we see the "envelope" getting low, we can reign in the spending in the category. Also, savings is a bill just like our utilities. It just happens . Period.

Good luck op!

 

[Karabee]

Grocery shopping can be the worst - and shopping at regular grocery stores without coupons is dangerous. I personally have found that shopping at somewhere like BJs or Costco for some things (lunch meat is a steal,eggs, paper goods) and then a place like Trader Joes for the rest, is good. Trader Joes has a lot of organic so you're thinking it's pricier, not so. They have some of the cheapest fruit and veggies around as well as some of the best pre-made frozen meals. I hate making lunch in the morning but hate buying lunch even more so I buy frozen Pad Thai from there and hear it up for lunch.
Another suggestion is one that may or may not work but I recently tried it. I've put more into my 401k so I have even less to spend each month. It helps me cut back on a lot of junk.