SO - did you/would you get a pre-nup?

[jrmasm]

We had nothing so no prenup. Still married after 22 years. If something were to happen and I remarried, I'd absolutely get a prenup.

 

[cluvsdisney]

We don't have one because there was really no need. If either one of us had assets that we would want to kept outside of community property I would not have been opposed to it at all.

 

[mco65]

No.. young and broke.. what was i protecting???
but if i were to marry again some day.. it wouldn't bother me if i were asked to sign one..

 

[sk!mom]

We married at 18- Completely broke and ignorant. I think a prenup is wise though so If either has assets to protect by all means get one.

 

[Shanti]

Interesting, I wouldn't marry someone who wouldn't sign one. I mean, are they looking at me as a cash cow? Yikes!

Or maybe they think, like many others on this thread, that a pre-nup means you're assuming the marriage is disposable. Not saying that actually is the case, but someone does not have to be looking to exploit just because they do not want a pre-nup.

Also, as another poster mentioned, pre-nups can be and are sometimes contested, so it's no guarantee of a hassle-free divorce. You can be as financially drained by attorney's fees as you can from an ex wanting a cut of your money.

Personally, I would be unhappy about being asked to sign a pre-nup. I don't know that I would refuse to sign one, but it would indicate a lack of faith in our marriage, and that's not a good thing. I believe in true commitment and would only divorce if abuse or adultery were involved, or if he just walked out on me and left me no choice. And if any of those things happened, I'd be entitled to some compensation. And so would he, if the shoe were on the other foot. I wouldn't cheat on, abuse or just walk out on a committed partner, so I wouldn't worry about losing anything.

 

[LSUmiss]

People change and are crazy, or you get the bad/good end of the stick...ya know? I hope you aren't suggesting that other people who haven't had the success you've been fortunate enough to enjoy are lesser. I'm sure you aren't, because it happens everyday.

The individual ppl aren’t, of course, but the marriage could be doomed from
The start.

 

[MrsDuck]

We didn't. I would consider it in a different marriage/circumstance.

 

[North of Mouse]

No! Would not go into a marriage with that hanging over us. I would not sign one and would not marry someone who wanted one.
Our marriage was/is based on faith, love and trust. To me, it's like saying, "I want this to work, but, just in case----" I wouldn't have married with those feelings on either side.

 

[Lilacs4Me]

Nope - 23 and 24 when we got married, and we had been together since we were 14 and 15. The only "assets" we had in 1998 was a 1993 Geo Storm and a 1989 Ford Taurus. Well, the cars and our mortgaged to the last penny 800 sq foot house. lol

19 1/2 years later, and we've upgraded to a 2016 Dodge Journey, a 2011 Kia Optima, 3 kids+a live-in nephew, and more bills than we had 19 years ago, that's for sure!

The only thing a pre-nup would do in our case is decide who would be stuck with all the bills.

 

[gillep]

We were both young and broke when we married so there was nothing to protect. If DH and I were to divorce, or if he were to pass, I would likely be in a situation where a prenup would be recommended, and I would likely want one, especially if DH and I were to have kids prior to the hypothetical divorce/death scenario.

 

[msjprincess]

No, we didn't have any assets to protect.

 

[Disneylover99]

No pre-nup for first marriage. All we had was love.
I'd probably get a pre-nup for the second one though.

 

[aprilchem]

No pre-nup, and DH had a significant amount of assets when we got married (I didn't; I had just finished my Ph.D. and had no money to my name). I personally wouldn't have considered it, because it seems to me like it treats the marriage as a business arrangement rather than a sacred union. But I understand why other people would want one.

 

[wvjules]

No. We were young and poor. Not sure I'd get one even if we weren't. I doubt I will get one for the next marriage either. We've been together for almost 10 years so most of what we have is "ours" anyway.

 

[tvguy]

Did not.
Would not remarry because our family trust/estate plan has a "one and done" clause. If either of us remarries if we were to divorce and remarry, or one pass away first and the other remarries, the kids immediately get half of everything.
Amazing when you do estate planning how many stipulations you can put in if something happens to you.

 

[wvjules]

Did not.
Would not remarry because our family trust/estate plan has a "one and done" clause. If either of us remarries if we were to divorce and remarry, or one pass away first and the other remarries, the kids immediately get half of everything.
Amazing when you do estate planning how many stipulations you can put in if something happens to you.

Sounds a lot like a pre-nup.

 

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

I didn’t bother with one since the only real asset I have at the moment is my 403b. While it is well funded for my age (I have worked for the same company since I was 20) my student loan debt is still more. If we end up divorced he can have half of my retirement as well as half of the debt .

If either one of us came into the marriage with large assets it might have been something to consider.

 

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

Did not.
Would not remarry because our family trust/estate plan has a "one and done" clause. If either of us remarries if we were to divorce and remarry, or one pass away first and the other remarries, the kids immediately get half of everything.
Amazing when you do estate planning how many stipulations you can put in if something happens to you.

So you did a postnup instead.

 

[handinpocket]

Your "divorce isn't an option" is pretty brutal. But good luck.

You really need to understand how defensive you are being. Your experience has made you unable to be objective. Divorce is not an option for many couples because they are in a committed and loving relationship.

 

[bellebud]

Like a lot of others here, we had nothing when we married 20+ years ago, so no. I definitely would if I ever married again. Later in life marriages are often quite different financially than first, young marriages.

For anyone saying no, you married forever, for love, etc, try to think of it if you were widowed and had somewhat substantial assets, and married again, would you then?