Slightly OT, need advice

[Glorydaz]

the loss of a family member - no matter the situation - can be devastating. first and foremost, I want to send you my deepest sympathies...it's so hard when there are unresolved issues and no one to give you the answers.

our situation is also a bit different from yours. my father-in-law to be died last March and my fiance's son was killed in a car crash last Memorial day weekend. I don't think I have to tell you the immense grief and loss we are experiencing every day. Planning our wedding during this time has been a mixture of joy and sadness to say the least.

we are setting up a remembrance table....with framed photographs, a vase with Calla Lillies and a candle in a hurricane candle case ....we will also have a full place setting at the table and we are preparing a special toast to them...

speak with your Mom - I'm sure you will find a way to honor his memory that will suite everyone... God bless....

Michelle

 

[Summer-Caitlin]

Thanks guys for all your support I knew I would get the right advice from you all. I really appreciate that you can understand that although my father and I were estranged, I still loved him and want to remember him some way during the ceremony. I do actually feel he is watching over me, and I think at times he has become more of a guardian angel to me. The anniversary of his death is tomorrow, so i guess this is why it came to mind today. I will definately talk to my mom, but the flower sounds very nice and I really did want something like a Unity Candle so I may look into something like that also. I'm going to look through the CD tonight and see what song would be appropriate and at which point in the ceremony I could play it.

jasnal - if oyu could give me the website for that I would be very grateful.

Thanks all

 

[jasnal]

The website is www.kensingtonclassics.com and the product is called the memorial glass cylinder. hope this helps!

 

[DisneyFairy19]

I say go for it.. He will be watching you on your day and it would be nice if you incorporated a little something in rememberance of him...

 

[ChocolateMouse]

I was looking through a ceremony planning kit from Rev. Kevin Knox and it has this section on page 75 of 111:

#7 Honoring a Parent That Has Passed Away

Many brides and grooms want to include some type of remembrance during their wedding ceremony of a parent, grandparent or close friend that has passed away. This should be done in a spirit that celebrates the love and memories of the deceased so as not to promote undo sadness in a celebration of marriage.

Here are some options:

Lighting a memorial candle. This can be done at the very beginning of the ceremony.

Officiant may say:
As we celebrate this wedding today, we would like to pay tribute to the special memory of __________, the mother of _________. She is with us today in the hearts of those who knew her and loved her. The love that she gave continues to live on, especially in the love that _______ brings to this marriage. We light this candle to honor _______. (Couple should go together to like the candle)

Presentation of single stemmed flowers into an empty chair to recognize the honored person.