Should ex help out with these expenses?

[King Schultz]

It's the DIS. If a thread goes on long enough it often evolves into an online game of telephone.

If she had read the signs they would have never waded into that building and the infant wouldn't be dressed in a string bikini and they wouldn't have to sue Ellen.

 

[Goofy_Disney_Dad]

If she had read the signs they would have never waded into that building and the infant wouldn't be dressed in a string bikini and they wouldn't have to sue Ellen.

Don't forget the NDA...

 

[mom2rtk]

I also don't get everyone mentioning to the OP that her driving the kids around like that is something she should expect for living that far out. Really? The OP is living near her job being that she is earning an income and keeping the primary residence for the kids. I know that I did not dictate to my parents where we lived when I was I kid. We lived where they decided we would live and we made decisions around that.

Perhaps because she lives rural she does end up driving more than most, but the kids are of the age where they should know the distance they are from various activities. I think the OP will more carefully consider these commitments in the future and be more willing to say no or to only grant one request.​

Yes, really. But I was always in that situation as a kid. We lived too far out to have friends over or to be as involved in school activities as I wanted. If the OP has a short commute and doesn't do much driving during the school year, I really don't see the issue with doing it for a few months in the summer, especially since she agreed to it up front.

I think she should be supportive and happy that her daughter wants to work. If she is truly unable to get a license yet, then that's just something mom is going to have to deal with and help the daughter work through.

What we don't know is how involved the other daughter is during the school year, and whether this is her umpteenth activity or one of only a few. I think parents should do everything they can to help their kids be involved and active, but not to in insane degree. We have no idea if that's the case here.

 

[kellyjeanie]

Where did she say she's not happy and supportive of her daughter's job? All she was hoping for was a little help with the gas money. Hardly indicative of the massive regret and ridiculous lack of foresight attributed to her by some people in this thread.

 

[Minnie_me]

But you complained about sitting in your hot car.

Nope, wrong again. I said that only in response to someone suggesting that I try to combine trips, and I was explaining that I tried to do that, but the wait was too long, resulting in me having to sit in a hot car.

 

[Minnie_me]

I think she should be supportive and happy that her daughter wants to work. If she is truly unable to get a license yet, then that's just something mom is going to have to deal with and help the daughter work through.

What we don't know is how involved the other daughter is during the school year, and whether this is her umpteenth activity or one of only a few. I think parents should do everything they can to help their kids be involved and active, but not to in insane degree. We have no idea if that's the case here.

LOL! WHEN DID I EVER SAY THAT I WASN'T SUPPORTIVE OR HAPPY THAT MY DAUGHTER IS WORKING!??!??! I'm thrilled that she got this job! She took great initiative, researching places that would go along with her major, and emailed them asking about employment opportunities. The manager was so impressed with her, that she hired her right away. She's working 40 hours a week, making good money, and learning a lot.

And as for the other child, she is *only* involved in musical theatre and things that support that endeavor (voice lessons, etc.). She dropped all sports after her second concussion, and has been focusing only on this.

 

[mom2rtk]

LOL! WHEN DID I EVER SAY THAT I WASN'T SUPPORTIVE OR HAPPY THAT MY DAUGHTER IS WORKING!??!??! I'm thrilled that she got this job! She took great initiative, researching places that would go along with her major, and emailed them asking about employment opportunities. The manager was so impressed with her, that she hired her right away. She's working 40 hours a week, making good money, and learning a lot.

And as for the other child, she is *only* involved in musical theatre and things that support that endeavor (voice lessons, etc.). She dropped all sports after her second concussion, and has been focusing only on this.

No need to shout. Unfortunately for you, "support" at this age for a non-driver often comes in the form of a lot of time behind the wheel. I'm glad she found a good job for the summer and that you are supportive of that.

I hope you find a way to make things easier next summer.

 

[jevs]

Nope, wrong again. I said that only in response to someone suggesting that I try to combine trips, and I was explaining that I tried to do that, but the wait was too long, resulting in me having to sit in a hot car.

LOL! WHEN DID I EVER SAY THAT I WASN'T SUPPORTIVE OR HAPPY THAT MY DAUGHTER IS WORKING!??!??! I'm thrilled that she got this job! She took great initiative, researching places that would go along with her major, and emailed them asking about employment opportunities. The manager was so impressed with her, that she hired her right away. She's working 40 hours a week, making good money, and learning a lot.

And as for the other child, she is *only* involved in musical theatre and things that support that endeavor (voice lessons, etc.). She dropped all sports after her second concussion, and has been focusing only on this.

Personally I would just give up trying to defend yourself on this thread

The boards appear to be very irritable today, have a

 

[kellyjeanie]

Personally I would just give up trying to defend yourself on this thread

The boards appear to be very irritable today, have a

Just today? lol pass the pitcher

 

[jevs]

Just today? lol pass the pitcher

 

[Tuffcookie]

OP, I am so glad my days as a divorced mom-taxi driver are over! I agree, it sounds like the best plan is to ask the oldest DD to contribute to the gas fund. Hang in there!

TC

 

[disney4us2002]

I only read page 1 and page 13 so I'm certain I missed a lot of bitc....nevermind. I think it's great that you are still getting child support. In this state, dads (and moms) are done at hs graduation, so you are ahead of the game. I don't know why your oldest doesn't drive, but since she doesn't I think it makes sense that she give you a set amount per week for driving her around, maybe $25?

Good luck with the rest of summer.

 

[Pixiedustaway]

Remember, this is the DIS where all children are advanced, mature, and gifted and all parents are rich, but in the real world even if a kid can get a driver's license they may not because their parent(s) can't afford to insure them, or a car for their use isn't in the budget.

The OP says her daughter has a valid reason that she is unable to drive right now, so let's just accept that this is the case.

Truer words, my friend. To the OP, I've send our congressmen this link they should be changing the child support law any second now. Check your Facebook feed for the announcement. ;-)

 

[barkley]

And as for the other child, she is *only* involved in musical theatre and things that support that endeavor (voice lessons, etc.).

"only". I laugh o/p because I think back to my youth involved in musical theatre when my mom's friends would mistakenly think that she got off easy transportation wise with me b/c my "only" activity was musical theatre.

little did they know........when I think of all the driving my mom did to voice lessons, dance classes, rehearsals, performances.............from 10th grade through college and beyond it never ended. if I wasn't rehearsing for a play I was preparing to audition for one-and when she allowed me (aka made the mistake of allowing me) to join a repertory group there was a period of 3 years of every evening weekdays rehearsing for the next show while performing Friday-Sunday the current show.

rest whenever you get the opportunity.

 

[CarolAnn856]

Nope, wrong again. I said that only in response to someone suggesting that I try to combine trips, and I was explaining that I tried to do that, but the wait was too long, resulting in me having to sit in a hot car.

Then I apologize again. This is a 5-day-old, 13-page thread. Things get forgotten or remembered wrong. I was really just trying to defend your daughter, but you don't seem to notice that part of my posts. I'll bow out. Have a good day, and I hope your daughters have a good summer.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

I never said I didn't want to do the driving. I simply wondered about compensation for the gas $$. Funny how many things have gotten twisted in this thread.

I haven't posted but I get your point.

I'm a divorced mom of two kids. I live in South Jersey and my XH lives in Philly. It's only a 20 minute drive but involves a toll bridge. No way would he drive to us to take them to work somewhere else.

Personally I would eat it and leave my ex out of it. I try to minimize any arguing with him. We are on good terms and I want to keep it that way. If I asked him for gas money for the 18 year old he would tell me "No, she can pay you." If I asked for the 15 year old he would say that's why he pays CS which I do agree. He goes above and beyond for other things but something like that wouldn't be it.

When I divorced with custody of my kids I knew most of the work would fall on me and I accept that. It's part of the deal. My XH is a pretty good dad. He could be better but it could be worse. It's part of the divorce package.