Scared & need your thoughts -DD is getting notes

[Tantor]

Tantor, you may want to try calling the office of Gerard Kennedy, the minister of education. With the incident that happened recently at the Catholic High School in TO, he might be interested.

I would also consider telling your teacher that your child will not be returning to school until the situation is resolved. Write this in a letter that documents the whole incident and copy the principal, trustee, superintendent, director and minister. You might want to also copy the Toronto Star; they would love to get hold of this info right now. It is big anti-bullying time around here and this is a situation that shows that your powers-that-be are all talk and no action.

It is so easy for the prinicipals to pick on the little incidences in the playground and penalize the kids but as soon as the authorities actually have to do some investigating, the situation is played down.

We want to go up the chain of command first and see what happens. It might end up with Gerard Kennedy..................
By the way both DH and I have kept play by play notes on everything that has happened (times , dates) .

 

[disykat]

It really concerns me here that a child may be in danger, and some are attacking those of us who are saying "Go immediately to the actual Police Department and sign a complaint" and "Go immediately to the Superintendant and file an official report."

This is not "turning" on the OP
This is sound advice!
(which the OP clearly asked for!!!)

.

I hate to bring this up again, but I don't think anyone has attacked people for offering advice - re: go to the police (though people did note that many continued to to advise that after she had clearly already done so). The thing that has people upset are the posts that say that they would have handled it better and that she is negligent for not handling it as they would have. One is advice, the other is not helpful.

 

[nativetxn]

I couldn't read all of your replies. I just wanted you to know that I am praying for your daughter's safety and for the safety of her classmates. This needs to be resolved. {{{HUGS}}}

Katholyn

 

[TinkerBelle2992]

I wish you the best with the situation. I hope your daughter and her classmates will be ok. I haven't read this whole thread, not enough time, but I did read all of your posts. Nothing like this has happened at my school. Other things have happened, knife, drugs, but nothing like this. Again, I wish the best. Here's some prayers and pixie dust.
(((HUGS)))

 

[bgirldeb]

 

[OceanAnnie]

I've been following this thread. I'm so sorry your DD and your family are going through this! It has to be totally unnerving.

I don't have any advice. Just wanted you to know I'm keeping your DD and your family in my thoughts and prayers. I hope it is resolved quickly. I hope they catch who is doing this and that this person is brought to justice.

Hang in there!

 

[mark&sue]

I really feel so bad that this is happening to you.

I would trust the police to help as much as the school I am afraid. Perhaps you have more confidence in authority than we have in the UK.

I know that until you are in a situation like this you really would not know what you would do. It is all so easy to say you would do this or you would do that.

If there is a possibility of another school it may be worth looking at. I don't know at what age pupils change school in Canada but if they do change in a few years perhaps it could do no harm to cut your losses and get her away from this school and go to another and make a fresh start.

I wonder how different this would be if it happened at workplace instead of a school? It is unthinkable that this would be tolerated at any place or work.

Everyone here is feeling your hurt and can't wait for the post with the good news letting us know the culprit has been caught and taken away to somewhere secure.



Susan

 

[debm]

Just a quick comment---you mentioned an email you were sending late Sunday night.....I have a son in Special Education and have attended a weekend seminar in law in the schools. One thing the lawyers stressed was not to rely on email, and I don't mean just that it won't get to the inbox. Problem is someone can say they didn't get it, or it CAN be altered. They said it is very important to hand deliver anything that you want read. So I would really encourage you to hand deliver the letters Monday morning. That also is a big sign that you do mean business!

Thinking about you and your daughter!

 

[Blueeyes101817]

Good luck next week--hope things work out soon!

 

[Debbie]

Karen, damo has given you terrific advice. I would call the trustee today, if you have his number. I've done that before and was able to speak to my trustee on a weekend.

It's discouraging that the Safe Schools policy hasn't worked for you. Your principal should be on top of this. And if you don't get satisfaction, it probably IS time to hit The Star. Or even a 'threat' to go to the media.

Good for you for keeping copious notes.

to you, DH and Chloe, too.

 

[TLHB70]

I am just checking in to say that I am thinking of you/praying for you and your family today. Please post an update after the message has been sent and you have time.

 

[LBAK]

I have been following this thread very closely as it happened to my DD when she was in the 10th grade. I would forget the chain of command by this time and go right to the top. My school district was excellent in their approach. My DD was obviously older but there was an arrest made within 2 days and a restraining order against the boy and the boy was removed from the school.

Your child loves her school. You need for the school to find out who is doing this and remove that person not your child.

My prayers are with you! Watch DD carefully, I thought my daughter was handling it well but it caught up with her. PM if you want.

Lynn

 

[luvmyfam444]

tontor -
I wouldnt' emial the letters - people don't always check the email or if they see who it's from they'll just not open it...or automatically delete it. I'd find some otherway to get it there. What about the delivery where you have to sign that you got it? but that may not get it there by MOnday...uhh I guess the other option would be to take it in person? That way you know they got it - but then again who's to say they'll read it?!? UUUUGGGHH! I dunno!

 

[Candleshoe]

I've been following your situation and praying for you guys. I hope you are in the midst of getting a good resolution for it even now!

No negative comments from this corner, just positive vibes!

((((((( Tantor )))))))

 

[Belle0101]

Sending more

 

[Steamboat Marti]

I hope today went better for your daughter. Any updates??

 

[DVC Jen]

I have also been following this thread very closely and have kept your family in my thoughts and prayers. I wish I could say I am surprised by what your family has had to go through, but unfortunately I am not.

A co-workers 5th grade daughter was sexually assaulted on the playground by a classmate last year. It took 3 male students and 2 teachers to get this boy off her. They haven't gotten the best support from their school either and had to get a restraining order as well as begin a lengthy legal battle because of this.

Please keep us informed. There are many of us out there whom haven't spoken up yet..but still care.

 

[Blueeyes101817]

hope today went okay for you!

 

[Tantor]

Hey all, Thanks for all your caring notes, PM's and such. Means alot.

Well we decided that we would either pull DD out of the school till this was resolved or I would volunteer in the school. Since DD loves school I decided to stay in the school. I have been working in the library (3 doors away from DD class) The librarian has been great and loved to have me the library. I was able to watch the halls alot more than they could and I did.
DD class were all sent a letter stating what has happened, that it is against the law, etc. and that parents should talk to their children. Bottom half of the letter was to be signed and sent back. They are doing an anti bullying presentation on Friday for all of the Gr 3 and 4's. Not sure why Gr 5's are being left out. DH wrote on the part that was going back "why aren't the Gr 5 involved".
We also got a call from the police officer and he went to his higher ups because they have NEVER had this happen in an Elementry school in Brampton or Mississauga. He is VERY concerned.
Our letter to the Trustee and Director hasn't been sent yet as we wanted to wait for this letter from the school. It will be sent tonight via registered mail with a follow up phone call tomorrow.
And the saga continue's..................................

 

[DisneyPhD]

Thanks for the update.

Did they say what the consequnces of such actions are? I hope they are stiff.

Best of luck. I think you are doing the best you can to make the best of a very bad situation.