SAHM's...Salary's to raise a family??

[DMickey28]

i am amazed by all the SAHM's on here. DH and I are trying to budget this year to see if we can make it work when we have kids. We live in suburban Chicago and are from MA.

What are the salary requirements to be able to do this? Provided that your monthly's are mortage/rent, car payment and insurance and basic living bills. Basically no (commerical credit card type) debt...

I don't want to ask what salary's the SAHM's are doing it on, but if you don't mind answering, i would love to hear!!

 

[CathrynRose]

Keep in mind a LOT of people live a very credit lifestyle (not all - some.... dont bother jumping, attacking and growling!)

 

[Pembo]

I think it can be done on any salary. You just have to adjust your lifestyle to fit your budget. We don't have much, shopping is a luxury, Xmas is frugal, we don't eat out very often, we don't drive new cars, and we sure can't keep up with the neighbors BUT I'm home and we're happy. We also have a low cc balance~usually less than $1000 and we only have one cc.

 

[mommaU4]

Okay here's my advice:
If you want to be a SAHM it can be done. Trust me. This is coming from someone who has been a SAHM for about 9 years now and used to live in the Los Angeles area (Burbank to be exact) where it is very expensive. And we have 4 kids. And if I were to tell you the amount of income we managed to do this with you would faint. But it can be done. You just have to make sarifices that not all people are willing to make. Which is fine too btw. It's a personal choice.

I don't get my nails done, we don't go to movies or eat at fancy restaurants, we don't take expensive vacations very often, we only have one car, etc. There were times and still are when we live paycheck to paycheck. There have even been times when DH has worked more than one job to cover all the bills.

But you see, it was worth it for us. I have never had to put my kids in a daycare or miss any milestone because I was there with them every step of the way.

And no, I'm not putting down anyone who has put their child in daycare before anyone jumps to that conclusion. All I'm saying is that it's a personal choice that everyone has to make and be happy with what ever they decide. It can be done if that's what you want. You are smart to be thinking about this now and planning. Good luck to you with whatever you decide.

 

[CanBeGrumpy]

We were able to do it because we didn't really care about "stuff" so we lived below our means. We drove old cars, we lived in (and still do) an old house that was furnished with hand-me-down furniture, I bought a lot of baby gear at garage sales, we didn't have cable TV, my wardrobe is very simple and inexpensive, etc. I went back to work part time when my youngest went to school, and now we are able to afford newer cars and other "things" but we still live below our means. It always amazes me the junk people buy with their money!!

We are just now starting to talk about possibly moving into a "nicer" home, but I doubt we will ever be able to part with the money! I am just a cheapskate!!

I would try to bankroll your income and live off the money your Dh makes. That way you can see if it will work, and you will also be building an emergency fund at the same time! Good luck!!

 

[Beth76]

For us it was easy because we got lucky. When I found out I was pregnant, that forced DH to get a better job. He was able to get a new job with a raise in salary that equaled what my salary was. Almost 5 years later he makes close to double that because he's moved up fast in his company. Plus, there are things that we live without. We don't have a huge house and we don't go on expensive trips to Disney.

 

[staci]

It is going to vary greatly due to many factors:

1. Housing. We have what I consider to be a very nice home for a young family and paid 100,000. I know there are many areas of the country that this isnt a possibility at all.

2. What kind of car/ how many car payments? Car payments can vary from 200-500 or more a month. We personally do not take loans for this type of thing. We save our income taxes, extra cash, etc. and wait until we have enough for a quality used car. By maintaining our vehicles, we are usually able to get a very good amount back when we sell.

3. What kind of savings do you have? Our budget is very tight, honestly with almost NO money for anything unnecessary. But we have a what we consider to be a very comfortable savings, that is there for the purpose of a emergency with our home, our cars, our health, etc.

4. Would SAHM be a long term arrangement or short? We feel very blessed to be able to do this short term, but are realistic in the understanding that I WILL need to return to work (hopefully in the school system) when dc go to school. Our budget allows us to only do what is necessary and is basically living paycheck to paycheck. We are comfortable doing this short term since we have our savings as a backup, but we know we will have expenses in the future such as retirement and college for our children. It is our hope that once we learn to live with one income, when we add a second back in we will be able to put nearly ALL of that into the retirement/college accounts. While we have both of these accounts now, they are not growing at a rate that I am comfortable with.

5. As you said, credit card debt can make a HUGE difference. We have none, and with a budget this tight that is really the only way we can make it work. We could care less about 6 months no financing type offers, as we will be just as broke in 6 months as we are now. We do charge each month and pay in full at the end of the billing period as we want to continue to build our credit.
6. Spending money. If you want to go to disney twice a year, you need to add this into the bottom line. Same with eating out, buying clothing, etc.

I would say the best way to determine what you can handle is to just sit down and budget out everything that will need, and see what the monthly income would need to be. If the home prices are hard to calculate, go to a realty website, find a few homes that look do able, and calculate your monthly payment based on the purchase price. The answer to this question could be very different for different people.

I hope this helped you in some way. Im not sure if I am comfortable posting dh's salary, but he is a maintenance guy for a property management company, so we are by no means millionaires.

 

[staci]

I would tend to agree with the people who say it can be done at almost any level, depending on the sacrifices one is willing to make. I do have a hard time believing that anyone could do it on the VERY low salaries (minimum wage) with only 1 full time job.

 

[MoniqueU]

Husbands job pays well I am not going to pretend it doesn't. But the main thing is we bought a house here in Southern California at the right time in the right place. That has helped greatly. Sometimes just when you bought your house and what your mortgage is makes the biggest difference in the world. I know if we were to be first time homebuyers right now things would be a stretch.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Keep in mind a LOT of people live a very credit lifestyle (not all - some.... dont bother jumping, attacking and growling!)

NOt any that you mention...

But the converse is also true--many work dual income b/c of the credit lifestyle.


I agree it can be done on any salary.

HOwever as with anything once you have children--your lifestyle is rarely exactly the same.

Keep in mind the expenses of working (including childcare) to evaluate what the true earnings are.

For the job I had--it came to about $1 per hour that I was making. I could do without the $160 per month. It has long since been made up by my husband's salary increases.

Also--when buying a home--use just the income of one person and not both so as not to overextend yourself and commit your income.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

Like Staci said, it depends on so many things. If you are willing to give up a few things, it can be done. My dh works lots of overtime and two jobs so that I can stay home. We do have a somewhat high mortgage payment, but we only have 3 credit cards with low limits, and one car payment. We use my dh's end of the year bonuses and we save for a Disney cruise every two years. We don't eat out a lot, and I don't dress my kids in expensive labels from head to toe. I sell on ebay from time to time to make extra spending money, and I have a direct sales candle business that I make a little extra money from. I get my nails done, but I go for months without getting my hair done! We don't have a house full of fancy furniture and fluff, and sometimes we have to save for things. I coupon shop. Sometimes there are good months where there is extra money, and sometimes it's tight. I consider myself very lucky and I'm grateful that my dh works so hard to make it possible for me to stay home with my kids. I think I will find something part-time when the youngest ones start first grade, because I do miss working outside the home a little!

 

[staci]

Also--when buying a home--use just the income of one person and not both so as not to overextend yourself and commit your income.

Very good point! We have so many friends who didnt do this, and now, even though they make WAY more than us, cant afford to stay home. Even if you DONT want to SAH, it is a much better idea to base your expenses on one income.

 

[DMickey28]

thanks for the advice and thoughts!

As far as this being a short term or long term SAHM, it would be short term for part time work at least and probably dependent on DH's success.

I figured out that my take home a month would be $500 with my current salary. My salary pushes us up into a larger tax bracket that eats away any extra I would bring home. DH is in software sales and two good deals closing make up my salary...He has a very strong future in his job...

Thanks, I appreciate the thoughts!!

 

[disneysteve]

I agree that it can be done on almost any income if both partners agree to make it a priority. DW and I agreed early on, long before we had DD, that she would be a SAHM. She actually stopped working one month before getting pregnant and remained a SAHM for 10 years, just returning to work last year.

We have always lived below our means. We bought a modest house based on what we earned at the time, not what we expected to earn later. We borrowed substantially less than we were pre-approved for and we're still in our "starter" home. And, of course, we have never carried any CC debt.

If being a SAHM is important to both of you, you can make it happen.

 

[disykat]

It depends on your bills. When we married, we knew we wanted me to be a SAHM and we were able to survive on dh's salary - so we did. We banked all of my salary and used it on a downpayment on our first home. Then we bought a small, older, starter home that we could afford on dh's salary (we qualified for much higher) and used my salary to make improvement then started some savings certificates for the car we knew we'd need in several years. We didn't have a dishwasher or a two car garage and we drove older cars that were paid for.

When I stopped working, it wasn't a big deal financially. When we sold our first house, we made quite a bit of money due to our improvements and inflation and now live in a nicer home. For us, isn't wasn't about the money - it worked because of the choices we made.

I agree with others that most people can do it if they cut back. However, those who are already living frugally and struggling probably won't be able to.

 

[cakesnkids]

Well, we do it, but I do supplement SOME with decorating cakes.
But how we do it is my husband works two jobs, and that's his choice. Keeping in mind that he'sa firefighter, he works 24 hours on at that job, and then on his 48 hours off, he works 12 hour days at his other job. We live in a modest house, 1300 sq ft, which was only $80,000 brand new, on a "lot" not on land. We live in a small community, with little industry, where people live and commute out to New Orleans La or Baton Rouge La for the "big jobs", but being a firefighter my DH doesn't commute.
For extras, I decorate cakes, and we save it up and use it. Part of the key also is to NEVER use extra money for things that are necessary, b/c then you will get used to having it. We drove used cars up till this year, when DH got a new one for the first time ever, and we don't go on expensive vacations, b/c we camp for vacation, ALOT to us is the $1200 we are spending on DIsney in the fall.
My husband says that working extra and having less is a small price to pay for his children being raised by THEIR mother, not someone else's. God love him!

 

[ReneeA]

When I found out I was pregnant with my DS, we decided to try the SAHM route. During the pregnancy, we lived on DH's salary and put mine in the savings account. That way, we had a pretty good nest egg built up, and we were sure that we could live on what he made.

 

[MoniqueU]

Another thing to consider is that if you have one SAHP be it male or femaile the working spouse may be freerer to work overtime, extra days or go on that work trip that may further a career. If someone is constantly having to leave work because their other spouse has already used their sick days that year or one needs to be the one to get the child at a sitters at a particular time that can impact a job. That is one extra benefit to having a SAHP.

 

[Sandy22]

I know this isn't the typical way to do it but I plan on borrowing $$$ to stay at home an extra year. I'll probably borrow the equivalent of buying a new car and to me it's worth the payments for the next 5 years to be able to stay home that extra year.

 

[luvmyfam444]

I think it can be done on any amount as well - but obviously depends on where you live - when we were in an apt with dd#1 we made less than $20k a year...but then our rent was only $350 a month!!! So that's makes a HUGE difference.

Check out these websites for some good financial advise....

www.cheapskatemonthly.com
www.daveramsey.com
www.crown.org

I have been a SAHM mom for 8 yrs now...BUT I have taken on "odd" jobs here & there when we needed some extra $ (like Christmas) I worked some temporay part time jobs (15hrs a week) when dh kept baby. When dd got old enough to be put into a preschool setting I substituted @ the preschool (again working about 12 hrs a week) and then most recently I worked as a nursey worker @ church on Sun a.m. & Weds p.m. so that was about 6 hrs a week. This $ seems like not much - but it gave me the extra $ that I wanted to play with so I didn't feel like I was taking $ from somewhere else when I wanted to buy dd's cute clothes....KWIM?

WE are making a bit more $ now - BUT have baby #3 on the way...& I'm gonna still stay @ home - have a friend who makes about the same as we do & complains about having no $ with just 1 kid _BUT they have 2 car payments!! PLUS everything else...

That's been our biggest is NO CAR PAYMENT! NEVER have had one - HOPE to NEVEr have to---if dh's car dies then it will be a piece of junk that we buy just to make it thru as long as possible (all of our cars have been 10 yrs or older with over 120,000 miles when we got them!) We sold our house & moved this year & took the $ we made to buy a newer van with only 50,000 miles on it - & we paid cash for it....so it should have @ least another 150k miles to go!

WE also did not have cable/satellite, internet, cell phones for many years. When we got the cell phones we went the prepaid route so if we couldn't pay then we just didn't have phone service (but still had it for emergency)....

You just have to be creative on your ways to save - & STAY OUT OF WALMART, Target or the mall---wherever your weak spot is (will be). I can sure cause some damage if I go shopping out there! SO I make myself stay away for the most part.

AND now this is our 2nd house that we've owned & it's only 200 sqft bigger than our last! IT's 1200 sq ft....with 3 bedrooms....tiny some may say - but plenty big for us...my mil is already suggesting we move 'cause it's too small! CRAZY! Like we didnt' know the size before we moved in!!!! OF course if I could own a larger house for the same mortgage payment in the same area then I'd choose bigger BUT since I can't then we are happy with a small house.

Ok - I guess I didnt' help you too much on my answers here - BUT check out those websites - each of them have great books out there that you can get @ the library too....