Rev. Gary Aldridge's death

[Fitswimmer]

As a Catholic, I have a little experience with watching leaders of the faith turn out to be not what I had hoped they were. The crisis of child abuse, and the criminal acts of those who KNEW about these pedophiles and did NOTHING to stop them still angers me beyond belief.

However, having said all that-it has not changed my faith ONE bit. Jesus didn't abuse those children, men who could not control their sinful passions abused those children. The Church did not move these criminals from parish to parish-Bishops who were more interested in their own power moved them fearing negative publicity more than they wanted to do right.

I view this situation in a similar light. What this individual may or may not have done doesn't change the Gospel, and hopefully doesn't change the faith of those who follow God and not men.

Jesus taught that we are ALL sinners, and He also taught that we should look to how we are comporting our own life before we start lecturing others.

 

[Caradana]

Aside from the weirdness of two wetsuits, it sounds like a fairly standard case of accidental autoerotic asphyxiation. A UN delegate died in a fairly similar way a few years back, though his case also involved an orange. (oh dear)

If their hadn't been a plastic appliance in one of his orifices, I bet his parisihioners would be speculating that he must've been practicing his scuba diving in his basement, and had a terrible accident.

I'd be interested in what his parishioners believe to be inconsistencies in the report ... I mean, inconsistencies beyond "he was a nice guy who always wore a suit and wouldn't be interested in doing those kinds of things in his basement ..." Denial is a powerful force. It's what humans use when the world panics us and we need to feel safe.

Does anyone know how they found the body? I hope it wasn't his wife. I mean, to walk down the stairs and behold that -- it'd take five years off anyone's life expectancy.

 

[LuvN~Travel]

Aside from the weirdness of two wetsuits, it sounds like a fairly standard case of accidental autoerotic asphyxiation. A UN delegate died in a fairly similar way a few years back, though his case also involved an orange. (oh dear)

If their hadn't been a plastic appliance in one of his orifices, I bet his parisihioners would be speculating that he must've been practicing his scuba diving in his basement, and had a terrible accident.

I'd be interested in what his parishioners believe to be inconsistencies in the report ... I mean, inconsistencies beyond "he was a nice guy who always wore a suit and wouldn't be interested in doing those kinds of things in his basement ..." Denial is a powerful force. It's what humans use when the world panics us and we need to feel safe.

Does anyone know how they found the body? I hope it wasn't his wife. I mean, to walk down the stairs and behold that -- it'd take five years off anyone's life expectancy.

The wetsuit was his, he and his wife had just gotten back from Central America,probably Belize (my mom doesn't remember which country he had told her about) from the weekend before. So some of their stuff probably had not been put away since she had to almost immediately leave to go take care of her sick mother in another state. And, no his wife didn't find him since she was gone. She actually started calling around Saturday when she hadn't heard from him at all, which definitely wasn't normal for him. Two of our church family went with the police for a wellness check on Sunday after he didn't turn up and his cousin south of here checked his farm down there.

And, yes we know exactly what the 'perpetrators' will be the word I use here, want us to think about what happened. That's the point of contention among those who knew him, not as a pastor, but by his habits, what he'd done that day, and even what his own quirks were.

Kim

 

[Buckalew11]

I am not sure I understand what you are saying. You think he was murdered and it to look like something else right? But how could anyone really know a anyone (including a pastor) and his sexual habits?

 

[Cool-Beans]

My reason for posting this is Im curious to know if it makes people think about people of the cloth that preach one thing and live a very diffrent life than what they preach. Does this make one question there religious beliefs? Question messages being preached to us by certain religions on who we should be called sinners? No reaction?

Im not sure if this would violate any TOS terms on the DIS and dont want to link it, its easy enough to search if your intrested.

Why would one person's screw ups make another person question themselves?

Since one woman kills her children, should I question my motherhood?

Since OJ killed a woman, should I worry that all men might kill me?

None of it seems at all logical to me. So, no, I won't be questioning myself or anyone else.

 

[freckles and boo]

I am not sure I understand what you are saying. You think he was murdered and it to look like something else right? But how could anyone really know a anyone (including a pastor) and his sexual habits?

In the case of a beloved preacher it has to be easier to believe that there is some perpetrator out there. If there is a bad guy, I hope they find him/her/them soon. Realistically, though, I can't imagine how someone could force somebody else into this situation without traces of violence that would be obvious at autopsy.

 

[Buckalew11]

Why would one person's screw ups make another person question themselves?

Since one woman kills her children, should I question my motherhood?

Since OJ killed a woman, should I worry that all men might kill me?

None of it seems at all logical to me. So, no, I won't be questioning myself or anyone else.

I agree with this.

It is why I follow God/Jesus/Holy Spirit and not man or the church. People screw up. People commit what God calls sin. Sure, I'd like my preacher to be a really nice guy who never sins but truly that is impossible for him or me...we're just imperfect. And yes, it is embarrassing for this church and this man's family in the way he died. If someone set him up, like freckles and boo, I hope they catch the people. I am sure it was my preacher, I'd try to defend him also. It would be heartbreaking to his family and I am sure he never thought of going like this...or did he? One would have to know the dangers in it, I'd think. Maybe he just thought it would not happen to him.

However, because this man died in this way has no bearing on my faith in God or even of other believers. Most religions who refer to the word sinners refer to it with the belief that all people sin. All people, all their lives. All people are hypocritical during their lives, saying one thing and doing another...just ask any parent. I don't think anyone intends to be be a hypocrite. I know I don't. But I know I am.

Am I standing in a pulpit every Sunday telling people what God's Word says and then doing the opposite? No. But ministers don't get a free ticket to perfection just because they stand in the pulpit. I am sure they struggle with many issues. Don't we all?

 

[pansmermaidzlagoon]

a little OT.... but at first I was thinking "how does someone stuff themselves into two wetsuits?"..now I am left wondering "is it even posssible for someone to stuff someone else's dead body into two wetsuits"? I am not being snarky or funny, I just honestly can't fathom either one.

 

[tedhowe]

I like to think of church; any church as a hospital for sinners and not a museum for saints. One doesn't need to be a saint to try to tell us what is the best way to lead a righteous life. Its an embarrassing way to die and his family has my sympathy.

I rarely find myself saying this, but I agree with Dawn 100% on this point.

I'm not even sure that I believe what he appears to have been doing is sinful, but I'll agree that it is not the norm of sexual behavior.

 

[NYBlue1]

Why would one person's screw ups make another person question themselves?

Since one woman kills her children, should I question my motherhood?

Since OJ killed a woman, should I worry that all men might kill me?

None of it seems at all logical to me. So, no, I won't be questioning myself or anyone else.

Well its not just some random person, its a preacher, one that preaches to some beliefs that are not inclusive to all people. Does that make sence, probably not and I could throw it our there plain as day but seeing that there is a dear friend and member of the deceased reverands church here among us I choose not too.

The purpose of posting this was to see what people thought of incident and if it made them question not their religion but the men and women that preach it to them.

I dont see how your examples have anything to do with my post and none of it seems logical to me, so we are both sharing that common misunderstanding of each other. I did post this in hopes of having some positive conversation.

 

[Cool-Beans]

Well its not just some random person, its a preacher, one that preaches to some beliefs that are not inclusive to all people. Does that make sence, probably not and I could throw it our there plain as day but seeing that there is a dear friend and member of the deceased reverands church here among us I choose not too.

The purpose of posting this was to see what people thought of incident and if it made them question not their religion but the men and women that preach it to them.

I dont see how your examples have anything to do with my post and none of it seems logical to me, so we are both sharing that common misunderstanding of each other. I did post this in hopes of having some positive conversation.

Question all preachers because of one guy?

There was a Green Beret who killed his wife and children. I did not feel that was cause to suspect all Green Berets of being murderers.

There was a teacher who slept with her student. I didn't suddenly think all teachers were molesting children.

If this guy did something wrong, it will not cause me to believe that all people who do the same job he did are suspect, either.

No matter how you state it, you are asking if we should be suspect of one person because of the acts of another. The answer to that, at least for me, will always be "no." I believe most folks refer to that as prejudice and would try to avoid it. Maybe I'm wrong.

 

[NYBlue1]

Question all preachers because of one guy?

There was a Green Beret who killed his wife and children. I did not feel that was cause to suspect all Green Berets of being murderers.

There was a teacher who slept with her student. I didn't suddenly think all teachers were molesting children.

If this guy did something wrong, it will not cause me to believe that all people who do the same job he did are suspect, either.

No matter how you state it, you are asking if we should be suspect of one person because of the acts of another. The answer to that, at least for me, will always be "no." I believe most folks refer to that as prejudice and would try to avoid it. Maybe I'm wrong.

No thats not what im asking. And nothing about what Im asking has anything remotly close to suggesting prejudice. Apparently im not explaining myself properly and cant figure how to so im leaving it at that.

I would say that more and more of these "acts" are coming to light with the new "everything is out there media "we have today. People that say or act one way and represent groups that do are being found commiting acts that go against everything they publicly stand for. That is hypocritical. My hope is that someday we can all respect each other and each others beliefs and not make judgements that impact the lives of our fellow human beings.

I have been trying to step lightly for the reasons that I stated in my previous post, and honestly if I knew how would delete the entire thread. I dont wish to disrespect anyones personal aquantainces nor do I wish to have responces to the thread from any poster do that. I cant expalin this to you any better than this. Have a great night!

 

[Ashley71]

I can see how members of this preachers church would defend him. They can't possibly admit even to themselves that he actually did what hes being accused of. If they believed it, they would have to admit to themselves and the world that they were deceived. To admit you're deceived makes a person feel foolish and used. So yeah, I see how church members will continue saying they know the "real" person and he couldn't have done this horrible, sick thing. Got to be a conspiercy (sp?). But WHY would anybody want to set up a preacher if he's a good decent person to look so bad to the world? Why? Nobody sets up a moral, kind, decent, law abiding,innocent man who only want to win souls to the Lord and does good works for no reason. Okay, what is the churches theory on WHY this good man was set up.

 

[Buckalew11]

I am just wondering why they would be deceived? Preaching God's Truths from His Word does not mean you will never fall short and sin. I think I stand by my statement of not putting man up on a pedestal. Trust in God because people screw up.
The way this man died does not tell us who He was in Christ. We cannot know that by the way he died.

 

[LuvN~Travel]

I can see how members of this preachers church would defend him. They can't possibly admit even to themselves that he actually did what hes being accused of. If they believed it, they would have to admit to themselves and the world that they were deceived. To admit you're deceived makes a person feel foolish and used. So yeah, I see how church members will continue saying they know the "real" person and he couldn't have done this horrible, sick thing. Got to be a conspiercy (sp?). But WHY would anybody want to set up a preacher if he's a good decent person to look so bad to the world? Why? Nobody sets up a moral, kind, decent, law abiding,innocent man who only want to win souls to the Lord and does good works for no reason. Okay, what is the churches theory on WHY this good man was set up.

Actually the church in the body isn't going to take the time to figure out why he may have been murdered (or mishandled enough to cause death). Our church feels its focus is not on that, it is on going toward the future.
For whatever reason God has taken him home, now we go on with the plans that are in place. That is why we have as a body left it up to the police and their efforts.
Now personally, many of us know something stinks, but also know the authorities are at a dead standstill at the moment. Any case can be closed for lack of evidence, but can be opened again at any time down the road. We also have enough law enforcement authorities in our congregation who will be keeping their ears open for any leads. I'm sure they won't be going out on their own in their spare time and taking care of it themselves. They wouldn't feel that that effort is required of them right now from God. God will deal with it himself if nothing else.

And as to why someone would set him up this way? Oh for any reason known only to themselves. I know there are others like myself who can actually give someone a good idea of what type person did this. Methods are used all the time by authorities to 'paint' a picture of a perpetrator (usually the serial type of course) when they don't have hard evidence. But, as to the actual person/persons who did it we cannot have any known idea to us what their purpose was, only the intensity of their efforts in this case. Devastating to us as a church and community of course. All we can only hope for now is to not only go on with our purpose and lives but maybe to take the experience with us for any future needs.

But, one note here...My mom informed me of this tonight that we actually have people calling and emailing our church office with extremely nasty messages since this hit the internet. The ladies in our church office are already in mourning like the rest of us, but are now having to take verbal and email attacks because of nuts out there! It is very difficult for them right now. I would ask for anyone's prayers for this situation. These ladies really don't need this kind of stress right now and certainly don't deserve it in anyway. You can only wonder at the cruelty of people when they do this.

Kim

 

[DawnCt1]

I can see how members of this preachers church would defend him. They can't possibly admit even to themselves that he actually did what hes being accused of. If they believed it, they would have to admit to themselves and the world that they were deceived. To admit you're deceived makes a person feel foolish and used. So yeah, I see how church members will continue saying they know the "real" person and he couldn't have done this horrible, sick thing. Got to be a conspiercy (sp?). But WHY would anybody want to set up a preacher if he's a good decent person to look so bad to the world? Why? Nobody sets up a moral, kind, decent, law abiding,innocent man who only want to win souls to the Lord and does good works for no reason. Okay, what is the churches theory on WHY this good man was set up.

The truth is Ashley, you don't know why he died, and regardless of what he did or didn't do, he didn't deceive anyone. He was apparently loved and lead his congregation to the Lord. Isn't that what he was there to do?

 

[Zippa D Doodah]

Never mind -can't seem to get my words right just now

 

[Ashley71]

The truth is Ashley, you don't know why he died, and regardless of what he did or didn't do, he didn't deceive anyone. He was apparently loved and lead his congregation to the Lord. Isn't that what he was there to do?

No mam I do not know why he died and neither does anybody else here. I read the autopsy report and a medical examiner put his name on the report. I suspect they have to be ethical & honest in their report for legal reasons & I believe his findings to be truthful, so it appears strongly that the man was living a life that he hid from his congregation. Reason I say "hid" is because his church members say he could not have done this shameful act. They insist they know his character and it would not allow him to do this. According to the ME he did do this and that's why I feel he deceived his church. I think they love him and I think from all I read he loved them too. He was weak because he is human and all humans fall short.

 

[DISUNC]

As me dear sweet departed Nana always said..."You'll always find more sinners in Church on Sunday morning, then in a Bar on Saturday night"

However in response to the Ops question....I pretty much stopped being a practicing Catholic after the whole Priest secret lives fiasco. It was the straw that broke the camels back for me.

 

[LuvN~Travel]

No mam I do not know why he died and neither does anybody else here. I read the autopsy report and a medical examiner put his name on the report. I suspect they have to be ethical & honest in their report for legal reasons & I believe his findings to be truthful, so it appears strongly that the man was living a life that he hid from his congregation. Reason I say "hid" is because his church members say he could not have done this shameful act. They insist they know his character and it would not allow him to do this. According to the ME he did do this and that's why I feel he deceived his church. I think they love him and I think from all I read he loved them too. He was weak because he is human and all humans fall short.

Actually what the coroner reports is the condition of the body as he examines it. However, the police report in its entirety may show a better overall picture of a crime or accident scene. There are ways for a body to be considered both ways if the end result is the same.

If a man is walking over a low bridge on a dark night and is found the next day face down below, did he jump or was he pushed? A coroner may never know the answer without any evidence such as fingerprints or a witness. The end result will be the exact same though, a dead body. He can only speculate as to what happened before he got the body, which they don't usually do, they leave the speculation up to the other authorities.

Kim (oh and yes there are things that I'm sure are in the police report that aren't in the coroner's report, because locally we've already heard about them, but unless someone is ever brought to trial most people out of the local scene won't know.)