"Warning --When I am an Old Woman"
by Jenny Joseph
When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
with a red hat which doesn't go and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
and satin sandals, and say we have no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
and gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
and run my stick along public railings
and make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
and pick flowers from other people's gardens,
and learn to spit.
You can wear terrible suits and grow fat
and eat three pounds of sausages at a go,
or only bread and pickles for a week,
and hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.
But meanwhile we must stay respectable
and must not shame the children; they mind more,
even than we do, being noticable.
We will keep dry with sensible clothes
and spend according to good value,
and do what's best to bring the best for us
and for our children.
But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised when suddenly I am old and start to wear purple.
