RANT, VENT, TEMPER TANTRUM!!!! You name it. I'm doing it!

[kcork1026]

So, let me start this by saying that I am grateful that my hubby has a job, and that I know there are people out there who need jobs. But I have seriously had about all I can take.

My hubby is a "IT" guy, and his work schedule is out of CONTROL. He works at the office from 8-5 or 5:30 or 6:00, or whenever they decide it's safe for him to venture home. Most nights he runs in the house, and immediately has to sign on to computer because something has broken that needs IMMEDIATE attention. He is basically on call 24/7. And then absolutely every 4 weeks is on call for 24/7. He just told me that Mon-Wed next week he works from home from 5pm - 8am, and then has to be available throught the day in case he is needed. Then the following week the same thing will happen Wed-Fri.
So he will be working 15 hour shifts and then may still be called during the day. He says they can do this, because he is salaried. I still don't see how.

We have 2 very active dd's, he is missing so much. Not to mention I am burnt out. I just am so ANGRY.

Thanks for listening or actually reading!

 

[druidia]

Sigh...such is the life of an IT person. I know how it is. I'm on call this week and you hardly sleep. It sucks. I'm also salary and they pay me REALLY well, so I really can't complain.

The best thing he can do is get his systems to a point where they aren't requiring his constant attention, if at all possible. It is a lot of hard work initially, but it pays off big in the long run.

Sorry he's missing out on home so much.

 

[kcork1026]

thanks for the kind words, unfortuantely it seems to be getting worse, due to cut backs. Only 3 on his team, and he is always stressed. Thanks again for the kind words!

 

[MushyMushy]

I hear you. Is he looking for another job? Tell him to put the feelers out!

My DH didn't have as crazy a schedule as that, but it was pretty bad. He was gone over 12 hours a day, and as soon as he got home, he had his blackberry to his ear and working on his laptop. He's spent the past couple of years looking for a new job through recruiters and he finally got one in our town. He took a pay cut, but his work hours are insane -- in the other direction! He's in the office by 8 a.m. and back home between 4 and 5 p.m. Nobody calls him at home, and he does minimal work on his laptop. Totally worth it.

 

[LadyShiva]

Is your hubby just starting out? How many years does he have in that position? Versus in the IT field?

Brandie

 

[pearlieq]

I hear you. My DH's job is very similar except that he's in government so there's the added issues of public safety. It's hard to pitch a fit about him leaving when 911 isn't working, you know?

Still, it really can wear you out, and I'm sure it's wearing him out as well. I hope things get better soon!

At a certain point, it may be worth giving up the job. Money is nice, but you can never get time back. DH and I have talked about that a lot.

 

[ziggystardust]

my friend had to deal with this with her IT husband. It was crazy. Even when someone else was the On call one every one just called him b/c they trusted him more. So much for being rewarded on a job well done. It was too much to take and too little salary. He switched jobs recently - hates the new one with a passion but is able to be home by 5 to see his new little baby grow up. He wouldn't ever go back

 

[BeagleBrats]

I work in the IT department in a hospital and it is crazy, we are implementing a new HIS system and working long hours. I know it can be crazy. Maybe it's time to look else where.

 

[MomofKatie]

I feel your pain, OP! My DH is in retail management (he's a district trainer), and he never works less than a 14 hour day. He is also a MAJOR workaholic, type A, OCD guy, so he does work at home on his off hours. He also takes calls on his days off and vacations.

I've become resigned to it- that's just who he is. No matter what type of job he has, he just makes work for himself.

 

[WhatATreat]

Girl, you are preaching to the choir. My DH is not only the IT guy, he is apparently also the office manager. And since the other IT guy quit, they are heaping his responsibilities on DH. Oh, and now he has been told he needs to do everyone's budget spreadsheets because the head office liked his best. So he is basically doing about 3-4 jobs. And they keep asking him when the broken soda machine is getting fixed.....

 

[Nala2007]

Could be worse, not only is my DH an IT guy he has a different job when he deploys, so in-port he works 13 or more hours EVERY day and when he leaves for six months, he boards hostile enemy ships suspected of holding terrorists, drugs, etc...

I know it doesnt make either any better, I'm just trying to make you feel better, pinky swear!

 

[Cindy B]

A very normal schedule for IT. It actually sounds really good for an IT schedule. Be glad you don't have either

a) a full night shift 3-12 midnight
b) an overnight shift 11 pm- 7am
c) split shift 7-11, am --3-7 pm or any other four hour shift combinations
d) weekend shift 16 straight hours 3 full days
e) lots of travel in conjuction with all the shifts.

My DH has done all of these combinations.
I was thinking 8-5, how lucky... my DH has been on a split shift 4 hours/day--4 hours night shift for almost a year. He sleeps in the afternoons!

He has been on call for a year solid at one position.

Seriously, that is a great schedule.

And yes, we have two active children- I am in full time college and DH is also in college as well.

 

[SetzKitten]

I really feel for you. I'm also an IT person and the hours are horrific. Then, once you are home, you have to field calls from every neighbor on the street who wants free help.

 

[DISUNC]

Been There Done that! ...and NEVER AGAIN!

I did this for years, and the pay was good...but since I spent so much time at/for work...lots of eating out...lots of paying someone else to do laundry, gasoline & stress on Car...etc!

FINALLY after a long (8 months) and intensive search...I took a job for just 3 days 12 hour shifts...AND THAT's IT!!!! The $ was lower, however since I work 3 days...I HAVE plenty of time to LIVE! And with the $ i am saving in gas, not eating out & with a lower Tax bracket...I actually have more $$$$ in my pocket. Also I go in do what I have to do...and get out!

Hakuna Matata!

It is very common for IT Mang to treat their employees as slaves!

Tell him to start looking and Good Luck!

ps I PM'd you some info!

 

[DMickey28]

HUGS ... My DH used to be an "IT" guy. Now he is an IT Sales Guy. It's a bit better b/c he isn't on call but that's about it. He leaves the house at 7:20AM and returns home around 7:00PM. Then he works on the computer all night until he crashes. The weekends are luckily our break time which until this last job was not the case. Before that he was a "Programming Sales Consultant" and he would work for 12 hours straight customizing software before he went on the road to present it to some company somewhere ... lots of nights and weekends on top of his regular work day with that job.

I feel your pain and I don't have kids yet ...

 

[kcork1026]

Could be worse, not only is my DH an IT guy he has a different job when he deploys, so in-port he works 13 or more hours EVERY day and when he leaves for six months, he boards hostile enemy ships suspected of holding terrorists, drugs, etc...

I know it doesnt make either any better, I'm just trying to make you feel better, pinky swear!

I do know there are so many who have it so much worse. And I feel guilty for complaining.

 

[Alex2kMommy]

I worked in IT for over 10 years (in QA), but did not have the on-call responsibilities they now have. DH also works in IT, but at a higher level with 24/7 on-call (I mean every day, 365 days/year.) He works regular hours during the day, but as the need arises, works evenings, weekends and in the middle of the night. There is no one else who can do what he does, and only a couple of people who might be able to handle a small piece of what he does.

So the company got him a laptop (naturally), and recently a blackberry. He is wired wherever we go, which I guess is a step up from the pager that used to have him dashing off to use the phone. Still, I'm glad he's able to be home, even if he is working.

He is well-compensated for what he does, and his boss is great about trying to keep his hours down and pushing him to take time off now and then. Like MomOfKatie's DH, mine is also a workaholic with a strong sense of responsibility for the company's success. It's just who he is, so I've learned to try to balance it with an easy home life, and push him to take a break now and then.

The company has finally recognized their 'single point of failure' and wisely taken steps to hire and have DH train some back-ups, but they won't be ready for awhile. Here's hoping he can either share the on-call responsibility in the future, or even get out of it altogether!

 

[Imagine Ears]

Your DH's company is lucky they have such a hard working IT person like him. Our IT guy does a whole lotta' nothin' besides sit in the back of the building in this little tiny server room and talk to his wife all day who feels the urge to call *CONSTANTLY*.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

When my dh got out of college he was "IT" for a Hospital.

That was 24/7....Oh how I dreaded the in the middle of the night calls because the printer wasn't working.

To this day, when someone says...."the printer, computer, etc...isn't working", I hear in my head my dh saying "did you turn it off and then turn it on again?"

 

[Alex2kMommy]

And I feel guilty for complaining.

Don't feel guilty for complaining. I complain, too, and you think I'd know better having worked in IT myself and knowing what DH is like.

IT work is long days and crazy hours, no question! I complain mostly when I get worried about his health, or frustrated from not spending time together.

He's been putting in long days the past few weeks, so I put my foot down and demanded he take a couple days off next week (when our DS6 is on spring break.) He didn't fight it too hard. Hopefully we can have some relaxing fun together as a family. Occasionally I feel guilty when I do something like that (which isn't often), but he always says afterward, "Wow, that was so much fun. We should do that more often."