Question regarding Catholic baptism

[tink_n_pooh]

I'm Catholic but I converted as an adult so I'm looking for input for some cradle Catholics

My DH married into a Catholic family and his daughter was baptized in the Catholic church. My cousin (not Catholic) was asked to be the God father and he accepted. A few days before the baptism my brother called our cousin to remind him of the time, etc. and said to make sure he brings his checkbook... According to my SIL it is customary in the Roman Catholic church for the god father to pay the priest/church for the baptism....

Oh and by the way this all happened about 2 years ago...

When DH & I found out about this the other day we were ROFL I've never heard of such a thing and neither has DH or his 'cradle Catholic' family. The parents of the child always paid for all of the fees with everyone else I have ever heard of.

My cousins and I have just chalked this up to some more of my SIL's antics but I'm wondering if anyone has ever actually heard of this practice before?

 

[LauraC]

Nope. I'm a cradle Catholic as is all of my family and most of the town I live in (town of 12,000 with two Catholic churches and two Catholic grade schools). I have never known of an instance where the godparents had to pay any type of fee for baptism. Usually, they are the recipient of a gift from the parents who want to show their appreciation. The parents have always paid for everything.

 

[The Princess]

Never heard of that before!!!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Most Catholic churches will not accept a non-Catholic as a godfather for starters. Not sure how they got around that. Unless the godmother was Catholic, then I could see them getting around it possibly.

A donation is not uncommon however I never heard of the godparent paying. That was pretty rude on your SIL's part. She just was getting out of paying.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

There are different customs or traditions I guess based on how the persons family has always done things.

I know here it is customary for the Godmother to buy the christening outfit. Though I bought DS's when my SIL (not Catholic) became his Godmother. I wouldn't ask anyone to buy my kids christening outfits.

When my DD was born we asked my cousin and her husband to be Godparents(life long Catholics) my cousin insisted on buying DD her christening gown. I fought with her tooth and nail but she wouldn't give in.

We paid for the church donation both times.

 

[java]

Well I had not heard of it UNTIL I was a Godmother at a very Italian Christening. And there they said it was customary for the Godfather to foot the bill for the church/priest while my responsibility was in providing the "gown" for the baby.
I had heard the gown thing before in my family as well- but the other one about the Godfather- nope never before.
This was all on Long Island by the way so things are always a little different out there. (said by a former LIer)

 

[mjkacmom]

I've definitely heard of it - I believe it's an Italian Catholic tradition? We paid ourselves.

 

[Lmichele]

Yep - that's what our family has always done. Godmother purchases the baptism outfit and Godfater donates to the church. Like a PP said, "There are different customs or traditions I guess based on how the persons family has always done things."

When my BF asked me to be the Godmother of her son, I offered to buy the outfit - but she had already bought one...so I split the church donation with the Godfather.

The way the OPs SIL handled it was strange, but I look at it as a way to say thank you to the parents for asking you to be such an important role in their childs life.

 

[mhsjax]

wow, I am just floored on all points, but then again I am baptist, never heard of "paying" the church for a baptism, we don't do anything like that, it is done for free.

 

[funhouse8]

We are Italian and had four babies Christened. I never heard of asking the Godfather to pay anything. The Godmothers did buy the babies outfits. And the Church will not let you be Godfather if you are not Catholic, My Sister was the Godmother and they would not let my BIL be the Godfather because he is Jewish, even after he told them he would make sure they were raised as catholics if anything should happen to us. I even told the priest that Jesus was Jewish but they made my Dad stand in as Godfather,

 

[joviroxx]

wow, I am just floored on all points, but then again I am baptist, never heard of "paying" the church for a baptism, we don't do anything like that, it is done for free.

Its not really a fee, but a donation to the church. Im a cradle Catholic and never heard of the Godfather being responsible for the donation, but I guess different people, different traditions.

I am, however, more surprised at the non-catholic being allowed to be a Godparent.

 

[mjkacmom]

Okay, I just checked my favorite book on this subject, Catholocism for Dummies, and it states that it is a US unofficial tradition for the godfather to make a DONATION (we don't pay - it's not mandatory) in the amount of $20 - $100 to the church. One of my dd's godfathers isn't catholic, and my book states that some diococes (sp) will allow a church going protestant christian to be the godfather, provided the other godparent is catholic.

 

[mhsjax]

Okay, I just checked my favorite book on this subject, Catholocism for Dummies, and it states that it is a US unofficial tradition for the godfather to make a DONATION (we don't pay - it's not mandatory) in the amount of $20 - $100 to the church. One of my dd's godfathers isn't catholic, and my book states that some diococes (sp) will allow a church going protestant christian to be the godfather, provided the other godparent is catholic.

Ok, well call it what you will, we don't even make donations other than the regular money that we give on a weekly basis. Myabe that is the same thing, but there is no extra donation for being baptised.

 

[mtemm]

never heard of that before. I have heard of non-catholics allowed to be godparent, as long as the other godparent was catholic. depends on the church.

 

[Mickeypooh99]

I never heard of the Godfather paying or of the Godmother buying the outfit. Maybe because I wasn't raised Catholic, but married into it. No one in my husbands family ever mentioned these traditions, and they are very big into traditions. We paid for everything ourselves.

As for the Godfather not being Catholic, in our church they only required one Godparent to be Catholic. The other could be of any religion as long as they were baptized.

 

[mjkacmom]

Ok, well call it what you will, we don't even make donations other than the regular money that we give on a weekly basis. Myabe that is the same thing, but there is no extra donation for being baptised.

When do they do the baptisms? Here, they are performed outside of Mass, like weddings (and we make donations for weddings, too).

 

[mommasita]

When do they do the baptisms? Here, they are performed outside of Mass, like weddings (and we make donations for weddings, too).

Same here.

Both my children were baptized in a Catholic Church, and we are an Italian family. I would never ask anyone to buy anything, or donate on our part. In our family it is customary for the Godparents to buy jewelry for the babies being baptized, first rings, etc.

We do donate to the church, and did, but again we the Parents did.

 

[Missy1961]

Well I had not heard of it UNTIL I was a Godmother at a very Italian Christening. And there they said it was customary for the Godfather to foot the bill for the church/priest while my responsibility was in providing the "gown" for the baby.
I had heard the gown thing before in my family as well- but the other one about the Godfather- nope never before.
This was all on Long Island by the way so things are always a little different out there. (said by a former LIer)

I'm a Catholic of Italian descent who lives on LI. My parents paid whatever fees there were for our baptisms, and my sister paid for everything when my nieces were baptised. I paid for my godchildren's baptismal clothing, but that was my choice.

and most Catholic churches are OK with a godparent not being Catholic, as long as one is. I had to prove I still went to a Catholic church when I was asked to be 1 of my nephews godmother, but that's because that particular disocese (in Northern VA) is conservative, the other 2 (one is here on LI, the other was in Richmond, VA) were not.

 

[BuffettFan]

Yep - that's what our family has always done. Godmother purchases the baptism outfit and Godfater donates to the church. Like a PP said, "There are different customs or traditions I guess based on how the persons family has always done things."QUOTE]

Same here.
Godmother buys the gown
Godfather handles the church
Parents pay for the Baptismal luncheon after the service.

 

[mommyof3rookies]

I'm Catholic, my dh is not. My kids were Christened, they each have a godmother from my side(Catholic) and a godfather from his side(Christian). We donated the money to the church, but their godmothers bought their outfits, totally their choice not mine and my dh's.