Question for the Ladies... tubal ligation

[proud_canadian]

I didn't read all the responses, but this is my story.

I had two children, both by c-section, my second one was scheduled, and my doctor asked me if I was interested in my tubes being tied. I started talking to him about side effects and my gynecological history (this was a new doc, we moved just before my 2nd dd was born). He asked me if i had any problems with cramps or heavy periods in the past and because I did, he strongly advised I do NOT get the tubal ligation. He said he has just seen so many women who end up with problems (not life threatening, but still life changing if you ask me) with heavier bleeding and terrible cramps. I was having a c-section so wouldn't have needed a seperate surgery, but decided to avoid it due to my issues I already had an didn't want to make it worse.

I too can never be on the pill due to a history of blood clots.

Anyways, after my 2nd dd was born, my DH went to get a vasectomy. He had the no-scalpel technique. It took him less time to have his vasectomy, including signing the paperwork and getting undressed and redressed, than it did for me to breastfeed our daughter! I waiting and fed our DD and he came out before I was done, lol. He drove home, and we watched TV. He was given tylnol 3 script but never needed any. Went back to work on Mon (had it on a friday), and everything is exactly the same as before. He did do a semen sample after a set amount of time (I forget if it was 6 weeks or 3 months or something) just to make sure he wasn't still excreting sperm and he wasn't. This is a very important step and many men do not go for this test and you can't know for 100% certainty that it works unless you do.

Anyways, I ended up with a hysterectomy 3 years later, and do feel bad about DH going through the vasectomy, as now it isn't needed. But he told me that it served us well the last 3 years and that alone was worth it. It was a given he would go after we spoke with my doctor, because he would never want me to take the chance of having more issues that could be avoided. He never was scared and never resented me either. It is very common here locally, almost all my friend's DH's have gotten it and I know no women who have actually got their tubes tied except my MIL!

Good luck! But if you already have gynecological issues, I would consider that when making your decision!

 

[I*heart*MickeyMouse]

Thanks for sharing your story ProudCanadian!! I (thankfully) have had a normal gyn history

 

[njmom47]

I had a tubal after my 2nd child.

(If you notice my signature, there are 3 kids!
He is our miracle child, for more reasons than that!)

Just sayin...

 

[Minnie J]

I believe everything out there truly has a risk and its just up to that person to figure out whether or not to take this risk. The pills have risk, TL has it, even vas for men have it. Its all about the choices and just praying for a good outcome from them

 

[herdtoDisney]

May I toss out an idea that you don't hear much these days? The diaphragm. It seems to be considered old-fashioned, but I am very happy with it. I've used one for about seven years, since my youngest (of 5) was born. It has been effective because she is my youngest

It's cheap, non hormornal, reversible, no side effects and once you get the hang of it (it is kind of humorous getting the hang of inserting it at first ) it's so easy.

 

[luvmyredheadboys]

I just sent you a message!! Let me know if you didn't get it!!
April

 

[rparmfamily]

I watched the show "The Doctors" today and they went over the risks associated with TL and Vas. It really made it seem that a vas was a no brainer compared to a TL. The rate of failure for a TL was high, 1 in 100.

 

[chellewashere]

I havent finished reading all the posts yet, but wanted to write my scenerio.

I had it done after my then youngest was born. We had to do it 6 weeks later due to the fact I delivered her in a Catholic hospital. It all went fine was simple just lots of cramping after. The problem insued 5 years later when I had an etopic pregnancy. That was so much more painful than giving birth. My tubes were burnt but we were young at the time and things I guess "just got through".

10 years after that my DH now and I decided we wanted to try to have another child and had to go thru IVF/FET to have her.

Im sure my eptopic pregnancy was due to my age at the time and that TL works great...sure did after that

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

I am a dude and just went this week for a consult for the Vas. going to be snipped in a few weeks. Going to have it done and when it is over, I am still a dude, still producing testosterone and all. Sexual functions will still be the same, less a few million swimmers.

The procedure for the man vs women, is outpatient vs inpatient, local anesthesia vs general anesthesia(all the way out) and recover time is 2-7 days vs several week(not sure exactly how long) Cost is probably less, mine is just $15 with insurance.

Not sure why your man is unwilling or if he is scared of losing his man hood. Not trying to sound gruff, but overall it is easier on everyone and he still can beat his chest.

I agree, this was actually on the Doctors yesterday morning and the OBGYN told the husband on the show that all the way around it was better for HIM to get the big V than for the woman to get the TL b/c of the reasons listed about by the PP.

I told fiance, I'll have the kids and go through childbirth, but HE'S the one gettin snipped when the time comes lol.

 

[lindap1]

First thing I have to say is PLEASE be completely positive that you will NEVER want another baby!!
That being said....I had a TL in 1995 (Hubby-EX now) talked me into it with the words "I have all I need with you and our two wonderful sons".
A month later he walked out on us! So be VERY sure that it is what you want!
Now, with my TL I had NO complications, except soreness. It was an outpatient procedure at the hospital under genereal anethesia. I was cut right above the pubic bone (about a 3 inch cut). Some cut through the muscle others separate them (I'm not sure what mine did) my recovery time was more like a month. After my divorce I had no problems with the fact that I couldn't have anymore kids, UNTIL I met my husband now. He had no kids of his own. To the point, I had a tubal reversal done in 2003 or 04. Luckily my hubby's insurance pays for ONE tubal reversal per lifetime. The reversal didn't work, so on to IVF we went. Now IVF brings up a whole new can of worms with religious people (I was told that I was interferring with God's work...same as what I was told with the TL). We did the first round of IVF, resulting in pregnancy and miscarriage at 4 months. One more round of IVF resulted in our beautiful little girl ( she was born in 2006 at my age of 40). That's why I said be very sure that this is what you want.
If would have known then what I know now, I would have NEVER had a TL, hubby would of had a Vasectomy. Good luck with your decision.

 

[Manda513]

My story...
Had a regular Vag delivery..got stitched up and wheeled into surgery for my tubal. Came out into recovery and back to my room. Maybe a total of an hour..if even that. The baby hadn't been brought back into the room yet if that tells you anything.
Pretty much as soon as I came to my room I was up and moving around. I felt a little crampy but that may have just been from giving birth. Other than that I felt pretty good and had no issues. Incision was maybe a 1/4 an inch in my belly button. 5 years later I can barely see it.

Now that being said I always had really heavy/clotty periods. These continued after the tubal...no real change. I ended up having the NovaSure procedure about 2 years later and it has helped but I am still having pretty heavy periods..just not as long as before (full 7 days vs maybe 3 now).

It's a peace of mind for me to know that if God forbid something happen between my husband and myself that I know I have no chance of getting pregnant. Sounds horrible to be such a pessimist but these days with all the divorces you just never know what life has in plan for you.

Good luck on whatever you decide!

 

[canadianjovigirl]

I too had a tubal 3 years ago. My hubby was terrified of the V due to friends experiences but when my dr. refused to prescribe the bc for me any longer as i was already past 35 i had to make a decision as we knew we were done having kids (have 2 girls and an adopted son) and i was not willing to take a chance and end up with a surprise baby so did make the appt. for a consult and booked a surgery date. I went to the outpatient dept of the hospital and it was quite easy really, besides my fears of being put to sleep I was out of there a few hours after the procedure and went home, took a nap and took it easy for the weekend and was back to work on Monday. I was always against having a tubal and thought hubby would have to be the one to do it, but the closer i got to 40 and the more sure i was that i was done having children the easier it was to go get it done as the thought of a baby stressed me more than the surgery after having 2 very difficult pregnancies resulting in 2 premature daughters...........

I has 2 small incision marks that are hardly noticiable and had no difficulties afterwards. I do not regret having the procedure and dispite my thoughts that it would always be up to hubby, i am happy with my decision and it worked for us.

 

[mischief32]

I am now 41 and am currently still on the pill. I have a year check-up tomorrow to get my prescription refilled mainly. I have no idea what we will do if this is denied. My husband does not appear interested in the big V so I guess we will see after tomorrow... I DO NOT want may more children and I feel this is mainly due to age and cost of another child...

 

[Minnie J]

My story...
Had a regular Vag delivery..got stitched up and wheeled into surgery for my tubal. Came out into recovery and back to my room. Maybe a total of an hour..if even that. The baby hadn't been brought back into the room yet if that tells you anything.
Pretty much as soon as I came to my room I was up and moving around. I felt a little crampy but that may have just been from giving birth. Other than that I felt pretty good and had no issues. Incision was maybe a 1/4 an inch in my belly button. 5 years later I can barely see it.

Now that being said I always had really heavy/clotty periods. These continued after the tubal...no real change. I ended up having the NovaSure procedure about 2 years later and it has helped but I am still having pretty heavy periods..just not as long as before (full 7 days vs maybe 3 now).

It's a peace of mind for me to know that if God forbid something happen between my husband and myself that I know I have no chance of getting pregnant. Sounds horrible to be such a pessimist but these days with all the divorces you just never know what life has in plan for you.

Good luck on whatever you decide!

This is why I got my TL. My doctor was saying to me I was young and Am I sure and what about if I got married and he wanted one. I told him Hell have to love on my 3 cause I won't risk being alone with 4 children. I think thats why I opted for the ring on my tubes instead of getting them burnt. I can have my TL reversed if I wanted to have another.

 

[Miss M.K.J.]

I had the Essure procedure done 4 years ago. I knew that I didn't want a tubal so I decided on Essure. Our son was 11 when I had it done and we knew we did not want anymore children. I was one month away from turning 35 so I knew I was done with babies. The procedure was done in my OB's office and I had no problems at all and haven't had any since then. I went back 3 months after the procedure for them to run the dye to make sure everything worked and that the tubes were totally blocked and they were. My insurance paid 100% of the procedure. So it's 4 years in the making and so far so good!! Don't be concerned that other people don't agree with the decision that you and your husband has made about the V. You need to do what is best for the both of you and a decision that you are going to be happy with. I didn't even really consider my husband getting a V--I am really not sure why.

 

[kristamil]

Just to weigh in with my experience...I had a TL in 2003 when my youngest DD was 2. She has had numerous health issues since birth and I knew another baby would not work well with the amount of time I had to dedicate to her and my oldest DD. I was on BCP at the time, but didn't want to be on them until menopause.

My DH actually was willing to get a V, but I thought it would be just as simple for me to go through the TL. Both my DDs were c-section deliveries and my recoveries were fairly good. DH is military and he couldn't afford to be off if he did happen to have complications, so I proceeded.

I had general anesthesia, 3 small incisions, my tubes were cauterized and was back home that afternoon. I dare say the pain and issues I had afterward were worse than either of my c-sections. The drugs prescribed made me sick. My belly button herniated and I had lots of cramping. I couldn't wear jeans for two weeks. My doctor admitted that I was an exception to most.

After the TL, my periods went from light 3-day cycles to extremely heavy 7-day cycles with lots of cramping.

In 2008, I had an ectopic pregnancy in my left tube. My doctor (not the same that did my TL) wouldn't allow me to leave his office and rushed me into immediate surgery because I was already bleeding internally. He said if I'd waited 24 hours, I likely wouldn't have made it. The removal of the hemorrhaging tube and a 2nd TL of the other side was done again with 2 more incisions. The recovery was not bad.

I have since still had terrible issues with heavy periods and fibroid cysts. Now, at 39, I am on a low-dose BCP to help with those issues. I am really right back to where I started from.

I know I have 20/20 vision as I look back on it all, but I wish we would've found the time for my DH to have had a V since he was OK with it.

Good luck as you make your choice! It is not easy, but you know yourself best.

 

[5stljayhawks]

Well here I sit 6 hours later, ice bag and all. The one thing I forgot to mention to Dr. B beforehand was NOT to skimp on the juice, after a few seconds and an adjustment of juice, snip here and there and I was done. Had dinner with fam and got on disboards to surf. There was some internal sadness, but great happiness for what is to come over the next 10, 20 or 30 years.....

 

[fitnessmouse]

Interesting discussion. Had the same discussion with dh for the last 5 years. ( our youngest turned 5 yesterday He finally agreed to get the V.
Went to the docter, turns out he has a medical issue and doctor is advising against it :-(