Punishment ideas for my 8 year old??

[NHdisneylover]

And I don't think giving essentially the same punishement to both girls did that. The 6 y.o. "bragged a little bit" because she'd been on the receiving end of the 8 y.o.'s bragging for a few years and was happy that she was finally getting to go to a sleepover like her sister. Not her best moment, but understandable. Tit for tat. The 8 y.o. did MUCH worse. Much. I'd give her a more serious punishment. The 8 y.o. felt entitled to assault her sister when her sister did the same thing the 8 y.o. had been doing for years. So it's fine and dandy for the 8 y.o. to brag, but if the 6 y.o. does it, she gets hit or spit on???? Totally unacceptable.

I have to say I am totally floored to have gotten to the update and find both girls were punished and punished essentially equally. I agree with the above quoted poster that the 6 year old didn't do anything overly wrong--nothing more than a reminder that bragging is not nice was needed there. The 8 year old was totally our of line though. SO now the 6 year old has learned that she better not talk about anything fun she may get to do because not only will her sister be nasty if she does, but Mom will punish her the same as the person who "hurt" her.

One good cure for spitting is to hand her a rather large clear cup or glass and tell her that since she loves spitting so that she needs to fill the cup with spit.

Believe me she will tire of spitting long before the cup is filled!

That was my first thought. Maybe I am too old fashioned. I think it is GREAT to explain a thought process or reason something is wrong to a child, but I think a lot of the posts on this thread are waaaaaay too far into the talk it to death and analyze feelings and basically take all responsibility for her actions away from the child side of things when what needs to happen is the child needs to see a direct and memorable punishment (yep, punishment!) for her actions.

 

[Alsobrook]

EMom

I find it refreshing and sometimes funny when kids are so honest about things. Of course their behavior deserves consequences....but kids make me laugh, sometimes.

 

[Magic Mom]

UPDATE:
talked to both girls after school... 6 y.o. DD admitted she was bragging "a little bit" about the sleepover...she said she bragged because her older sister brags to her about all of the cool things she gets to do, so she for once got to do something special and wanted to tell her about it.

8 y.o. says that she knew that spitting was wrong and said she would've hit her sister except her hands were full (lunch box in one hand and dog leash in the other), so spitting seemed easiest... She promised to never do it again.. and both agreed they were in the wrong. They had no playdates today, followed by no electronics (tv, computer, videogames) and they had to skip dessert...but thats it....they got it---I don't think it'll happen again... thanks for the advice!

Bragging and spitting get the same punishment?

 

[SaraJayne]

I have to say I am totally floored to have gotten to the update and find both girls were punished and punished essentially equally. I agree with the above quoted poster that the 6 year old didn't do anything overly wrong--nothing more than a reminder that bragging is not nice was needed there. The 8 year old was totally our of line though. SO now the 6 year old has learned that she better not talk about anything fun she may get to do because not only will her sister be nasty if she does, but Mom will punish her the same as the person who "hurt" her.


That was my first thought. Maybe I am too old fashioned. I think it is GREAT to explain a thought process or reason something is wrong to a child, but I think a lot of the posts on this thread are waaaaaay too far into the talk it to death and analyze feelings and basically take all responsibility for her actions away from the child side of things when what needs to happen is the child needs to see a direct and memorable punishment (yep, punishment!) for her actions.

I agree with everything you said.

No way does bragging (if she even was) deserve the same punishment as spitting on someone.

 

[136368]

In the future you could threaten to erase the offender's PlayStation saved games...

 

[goofyintoronto]

UPDATE:
talked to both girls after school... 6 y.o. DD admitted she was bragging "a little bit" about the sleepover...she said she bragged because her older sister brags to her about all of the cool things she gets to do, so she for once got to do something special and wanted to tell her about it.

8 y.o. says that she knew that spitting was wrong and said she would've hit her sister except her hands were full (lunch box in one hand and dog leash in the other), so spitting seemed easiest... She promised to never do it again.. and both agreed they were in the wrong. They had no playdates today, followed by no electronics (tv, computer, videogames) and they had to skip dessert...but thats it....they got it---I don't think it'll happen again... thanks for the advice!

I have to say I am totally floored to have gotten to the update and find both girls were punished and punished essentially equally. I agree with the above quoted poster that the 6 year old didn't do anything overly wrong--nothing more than a reminder that bragging is not nice was needed there. The 8 year old was totally our of line though. SO now the 6 year old has learned that she better not talk about anything fun she may get to do because not only will her sister be nasty if she does, but Mom will punish her the same as the person who "hurt" her.

I totally agree, i am floored too. 6yo did say that the 8yo brags all the time, thats why she took this opportunity to brag too. So not only did she learn she better keep quiet and not get excited about things, she learned that her older sister gets away with bragging all the time and that not only will she be hit or spit on by her sis when she shares her excitement, but her mom will punish her too. Wow!!