Pro's to having only 1 child...

[ThreeMusketeers]

Any of you out there only have one little disney baby? Do you like only have one child? I am torn..on one hand I love that we can give all the attention in the world to dd. I love that it is getting closer to a time now when dh and i can enjoy some time together and that we will have alot of extra money to do fun things with. But a part of me is screaming have more babies. And is dreaming of that smell again , and all the firsts, being pregnant and seeing my daughter with a sibling. And watching them grow together. For all of you with solo kids and keeping it that way...what do you think are the pros?

 

[TallyLassie]

I have two ds 6 and dd 8. One of the pros to having only one child I would think is no arguing. Sometimes I think my kids would argue over a piece of string.

 

[nuke]

I think the biggest advantage is that we can do so much more with just one child financially. I don't have to worry about airline tickets, hotel rooms etc. I don't have to worry if he wants to do a new activity that costs say $50 a month but if I had 3 kids it would be $150 a month. I can keep my small non-gas-guzzling car. These are just a few.

 

[Not so Dumbo]

I have two ds 6 and dd 8. One of the pros to having only one child I would think is no arguing. Sometimes I think my kids would argue over a piece of string.

I was thinking this samething
I have 3 kids so I can only tell you how I would think it would be different. Less daycare expense, less expensive to go on vacation ie tickets, meals. And of course the whole undivided attention issue.

 

[dmslush]

I don't know if there are any real pros.. just like I'm not sure there are any real cons. I am just satified with one child. Sure, at times I have had the urge to have more, but then when I think about all the dirty diapers, lost sleep, etc.. no way would I do that again. DD was not an easy baby. Each day was a battle for the both of us, she was colicy, she was very irritable. It was like she was this little genius trapped in a baby body and she wanted out. She wanted to talk, she wanted to walk and be mobile. And until she could do those things, she was cranky as all get out. LOL

So, I decided that one was all I need and all I could handle. Now, as an older child, she has been great.. she is like wine, the older she gets the better she is LOL

I do worry when something happens to me or her dad and her having to make a hard decision about one of us on her own. That worries me, but I am confident that she will go out and create her own family and have a support system that is not just her parents.

 

[Aidensmom]

I think the biggest advantage is that we can do so much more with just one child financially. I don't have to worry about airline tickets, hotel rooms etc. I don't have to worry if he wants to do a new activity that costs say $50 a month but if I had 3 kids it would be $150 a month. I can keep my small non-gas-guzzling car. These are just a few.

What she said.

Also, we don't have to worry about sibling rivalry (though DS gets jealous when the dog sits in my lap. )

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

What she said.

Also, we don't have to worry about sibling rivalry (though DS gets jealous when the dog sits in my lap. )

My DD gets jealous over the cat!
I agree with other posters. I can support two activities at a time for my DD. I would have loved to have had a second but due to other issues we stayed with one. My DH promised me that I could spoil her anyway I wanted if we didn't have any others. So everytime he starts to complain I remind him of his promise.

 

[Cool-Beans]

I have a total of four. Pros to one would be that nobody would ever come to you and ask you why Arbor Day meant they were going to die (because their brothers wouldn't tell them that.)

Nobody fights about who had the front seat for the longer time.

Less laundry, less illness, less worry, less money...less work!

You can let the kid pick which fast food place without 30 minutes of, "No, I don't want Taco Bell," and, "Well, then, I don't want McDonalds."

When you find a nick in the coffee table, you know who did it.

Nobody says, "God, you're sooo stupid-uh!"

The biggest reason I wouldn't want an only child is that DH and I will die one day. I wouldn't want to leave them alone in the world. No way to know if they'll marry and have kids or what. I know people who are all alone. It just breaks my heart.

 

[ThreeMusketeers]

Thanks everyone! I would love to hear more pro's and cons maybe? Anyone only have one and wish they would've had more?

 

[CEDmom]

We have 1 and are happy about our decision. DD is adopted and we felt we needed to give her own undivided time and attention when she 1st joined our family. The more time that went by the less we wanted to go through all that's involved in adopting to add to our family.

I sometimes feel badly about DD not having siblings because there will come a time when she won't have us anymore. We do make an effort to get together with extended family so she grows up with her cousins. They're scattered across the country though so it's hard.

Luckily, DD has several friends who are only children so she doesn't think much about it. Occasionally she'll ask for a sister but then I think if she had one she might be asking to send her back - you can't ever win with kids .

I have to say our life is pretty flexible just having one. We're able to go lots of places and do lots of things. Also, DH and I can do things alone together or on our own fairly easily.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I never really thought of it in terms of pros and cons. It is more of a persoanl preferance. We only wanted one child, and we have one.

DH is an only child and I was an only child until I was 10. Being an only child was working FINE for me, and would have been fine as a permanent arrangement.

DS is very clear that he has no desire for siblings, and really, he is 10 now and I have seen from personal experience that the 10 year gap is too wide. Having a baby now would be silly, so it's a good thing I don't want more kids!

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

We only have one and right now, I'm kind of at the point where I've decided that if the dr cannot absoultely 100% guarentee I'm going to have another boy, I don't think I want another one. I'm sure girls are lovely and fun to have and if you have one, yay for you. I just do not want one. Not at all.


TOV

 

[HSMndLKfan92]

I am an only child. I would have to say the benefits for my parents are that 1). They do not have to spend tons of money on things like birthdays/holidays. 2). They don't have to break up fights, as you would say, over pieces of string. (Sorry, I find that funny.) And 3). They won't have to worry about more than one college tuition in a few years time.

 

[Amity 3]

when you get the right one, one is enough:

our place is a cheerleader flophouse. she may be an only child, but she's never lonely. and we don't have to send the others to college.

 

[KrnB]

I ended up with a 2-for-1, so I can't tell you about having one child from a parent's perspective. However, I am an only child myself, so I can give you my thoughts from that angle.

I agree with the things others said. The financial aspect - they were able to give me what I needed and most of what I wanted (within reason). They were able to devote their attention to me. There was a whole lot less bickering.

I would imagine that I have a closer relationship with my parents because it was just the three of us. Hard to say that for sure, as it might have happened anyway, but probably not as much.

I think only children tend to be creative too, as they have to find ways to entertain themselves. I noticed that a lot with my Dstepson, who was an only child until the boys were born, as he could turn just about anything into a toy.

I love being an only child, but there have been times where I wished I had a sibling. That's especially true as an adult, as I see the close relationships that many people have with their siblings in adulthood. Of course, this doesn't always happen. And as a kid, I never had a shortage of people willing to "sacrifice" by donating their brother or sister to me.

Honestly, knowing that having a sibling would totally change who I am, I wouldn't have it any other way than the way it is.

There are pros and cons either way. Talk to your DH and follow your heart. If you make the decision together, you'll be happy with it no matter which way you go.

 

[Aidensmom]

I sometimes feel badly about DD not having siblings because there will come a time when she won't have us anymore. We do make an effort to get together with extended family so she grows up with her cousins. They're scattered across the country though so it's hard.

Extended family is a great thing.

My sister also only has one child (and also plans to only have one) who is just a little younger than my son and our children are very close. They may not live in the same house, but they are still family and will be there for each other. My brother and sister also both treat him like they do their own children. I am not worried about him ever really being alone. Not to mention that he makes friends very easily!

 

[Disney4Drew]

We love having an only. There are many pros and cons to all family sizes, and you are the only one who can decide what is right for your family.

Here are some things we love:
- more financial freedom
- easier to pick up and do things
- it is easy to schedule DS for activities
- can take more vacations
- choose private school if we want

One other big factor is that I decided to quit my job and go to graduate school full-time. This allows me to be home with DS most of the time. I'll be done by the time he enters kindergarten, so we won't need to worry about a babysitter or daycare. My Mom watched him while I was working (she started watching him at 9 months old), but I really couldn't stand it. I couldn't go through that with a baby again. I am a teacher so it will be easier to work my schedule around his.

 

[Beth76]

Not the side you want hear, but what the heck. I absolutely love having 2. They are such good buddies and we get extra joy by watching them together. They are good at keeping each other occupied. We struggled with the decision on having a second because our first was such a good baby and was very healthy; I didn't want to push my luck. I also hated being pregnant and had a difficult recovery. But ultimately it came down to the fact that DH and I both come from very small families. We felt it was the best thing for my son to have a sibling so that he wouldn't be left "alone".

 

[NJOYURLIFE]

We have 3 children and I sometimes feel bad because my time gets so divided. Not to mention money issues. My son wants to go to a local private high school and if he goes my daughter will also want to go. While tuition for one at a time would be doable, tuition for the two at the same time makes me hyperventalate. I don't even want to think of college costs. Also because there is 3 there is always at least one event each week that has no parent present.

Most days though I wouldn't change a thing though.

 

[Longsx3]

We weren't sure if we would have a second child or not then it became medically impossible.

Here is what we like about having an only:

DD gets our undivided attention, at home, in school and during her extracurricular activites.

Financially having only one child we are able to do for her much more than if we had two.

No fighting, it is very peaceful in our house and in our car!


I feel like we know her so much better than my parents knew me or any of my 5 siblings!